McDisasters 2: Return of the Trucker. Part 2, for anyone interested. This is the end of the trucker. If it gets enough positive feedback, I will continue with o mcdisaster
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McDisasters 2: Return of the Trucker

McDisasters 2: Return of the Trucker. Part 2, for anyone interested. This is the end of the trucker. If it gets enough positive feedback, I will continue with o

Part 2, for anyone interested. This is the end of the trucker. If it gets enough positive feedback, I will continue with other epics of disgusting proportions. 100% OC
LINK TO FIRST PART /funny_pictures/4530401/McDisasters/
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comanderspy and masterchiefawesome had a great idea. so far, so good...

name Mcdonalds, different manager
******* . GUY. comes back in like nothing
happened
gspot him from the grill area, tell the new boss previous
story
ccan' t refuse him service, store never pressed charges
gguy is out of his mind on something stronger than
Excedrin
borders 150 nuggets
tthats
a small cup full of ranch to dip them in
wave to check with manager
i' m afraid we can' t do that, dave'
flips ****
stakes sauce packets we gave him, drills them into the
windows with all the power ofa cracked out
trucker
danhales about 30 nuggets
instantly ill
explosively all OVER the trash can
avi
rules to sit and eat the rest of his nuggets
calls the cops
ftracker leaves, we don' t know his actual name, or what
truck is his in the lot next door.
ddude gets awae with it again.
dtr For mew
i.) (facc cent like it,
...
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+1892
Views: 91013
Favorited: 129
Submitted: 04/10/2013
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Comments(157):

[ 157 comments ]
What do you think? Give us your opinion. Anonymous comments allowed.
#32 - Dakafal (04/11/2013) [-]
McStorytime
>be 17 in highschool
>be a senior, so I'm allowed off campus for lunch
>it's ************* monopoly time at Micky D's
>friends and I pretty much eat for free with as many free food pieces we get
>one day some cracked out junky walks in
>he's behind us in the very long line
>keeps mumbling under his breath about how he's "gonna get his 'nopoly on"
>apparently "this time is it" and he's gonna "win it all" because he prophesied it after divining his future in his nuggets with a combo of heroin, crack, and pain killers
>all the students in line know something very interesting is going to happen
>we're getting nervous cos he keeps casually resting his hands on our shoulders
>finally order our food and get the **** out of his way
>he surprises everyone and orders very calmly
>the only weird thing about his order was that he ordered two of every item that came with monopoly pieces
>cashier tells him his total
>he is obviously displeased with the total
>stops to think for a second
>one can only assume he pondered the mysteries of the universe and divined what he should do next
>he orders some cookies
>everyone in the place exhales an audible sigh of relief
>then he freaks everyone else out again by screaming "WAIT ONE MINUTE ***** BITCH"
>"I WANT THE FRESHEST GOOIEST COOKIE YOU GOT"
>cashier nervously hands him a piping hot and delicious looking cookie
>he takes it calmly and thanks her with the most sincere thank you I have ever heard
User avatar #33 to #32 - Dakafal (04/11/2013) [-]
>then he puts the cookie in the palm of his hand
>looks at it
>really studies the complexities of the cookie
>sees beauty in the way the light glistened off the yet-cooled chocolate
>reaches back and slaps the cashier across her face with the force that only a raging ********************************* could deliver
>screams "I AIN'T PAYIN' DAT MUCH FOR MY GOD DAMMMMMMMMMNED FOOD, bitch"
>bits of cookie are falling off of the cashiers face as she lapses into shock
>she faints
>manager saw the whole thing
>without missing a beat he picks up a scalding, freshly brewed coffee
>launches it across the kitchen
>it's flight pattern is a thing of wonder
>flies perfectly horizontal, and the open end meets his face at a 90 degree angle
>the cup crumples like it was designed by a car manufacturer to perfectly deliver justice to his face in the form of 3rd degree burn inducing coffee
>the sound that emanates from his throat as he stumbles back can only be described as a cross between the Wilhelm scream and what I like to think a velociraptor would sound like if you introduced thermite to its testicles
>he continues roaring as he flails around
>he manages to take out a couple of innocent students
>half of the football team and the wrestling team jump on him and manage to subdue him
>but not for long
>he breaks free of his mortal captors and runs to the door
>he turns around and screams at us "THE PROPHET SHALL NOT BE DENIED"
>then he just runs off and heads into a neighborhood
>at least he's not our problem anymore
User avatar #34 to #33 - Dakafal (04/11/2013) [-]
>no one knows where to go from here
>decide calling an ambulance for the girl is a good idea
>later we're told he shattered one side of her jaw and cheek bone
>we get back to school and the principle announces that all who "saw the McDonalds incident report to the office"
>go to office, police get our stories
>we get told to go home
>not gonna say no
>watch news later that night
>they talk about the incident I saw
> apparently after he ran into the unsuspecting neighborhood he started running into unlocked homes
>all he would do is take a lap around the house and knock over some **** before leaving
>he did this for over 3 hours
>running, nonstop
>for over 3 hours
>eventually he's arrested and we hear no more of the prophet

I just want to know how the **** a fat drugged out black guy managed to run around a neighborhood for 3 hours before they ******* caught him.
#60 to #34 - senorfrog (04/11/2013) [-]
I already lost it at the "what I like to think a velociraptor would sound like if you introduced thermite to its testicles" part.
User avatar #48 to #34 - thatscrewedupkid (04/11/2013) [-]
this, by far, was the greatest thing ive ever read. 9001/10
#59 to #34 - tankthejackal ONLINE (04/11/2013) [-]
Comment Picture
User avatar #64 to #34 - ompalomper (04/11/2013) [-]
that there was some funny ****
User avatar #56 to #34 - GamerMandrew (04/11/2013) [-]
I've never had to choke down so many tears in the middle of class. You sir, are a god. Regardless if this is OC or not.
#51 to #34 - sprudlebass (04/11/2013) [-]
epic story
User avatar #52 to #34 - wesselite (04/11/2013) [-]
you sir are getting saved, not sure if this is oc from you but damn is it glorious. +1 thumb.
#105 to #34 - thekarmacharger (04/11/2013) [-]
Screen capped for futeure LOLS
User avatar #132 to #34 - iamtheblackgoat (04/11/2013) [-]
"THE PROPHET SHALL NOT BE DENIED"

definitely lost it then
#53 to #34 - chewythewolftwo ONLINE (04/11/2013) [-]
Holy **** , been laughing for ten minutes here
#134 to #34 - anon (04/11/2013) [-]
He was probablly high on bath salts. 10/10 would read again
#79 - tropicalbonerfish (04/11/2013) [-]
>18   
>working at McDonald's   
> old 			****		 an caretaker come in    
> I take their order   
>old 			****		 clearly to sick to be there   
>sneezes drops a  			*******		 of buggers on the counter   
>Caretaker and old 			****		 sit down to eat   
>Old 			****		 throws up all over the table and 			*****		 himself   
> Care taker keeps eating like nothing happened   
> my face when manager tells me to clean it up
>18
>working at McDonald's
> old **** an caretaker come in
> I take their order
>old **** clearly to sick to be there
>sneezes drops a ******* of buggers on the counter
>Caretaker and old **** sit down to eat
>Old **** throws up all over the table and ***** himself
> Care taker keeps eating like nothing happened
> my face when manager tells me to clean it up
#78 - nohate (04/11/2013) [-]
McStorytime
>Be me 19 opening at 5am at my mcdonalds
>well known crazy lady comes in(cries and screams for no reason)
>she pays for her coffee
>goes to sit in the corner
>then moves to opposite corner
>then sits at a booth
>gets a refill
>then she sits by the garbage can
>wtf....
>she goes to bathroom with her coffee
>ewww....
>she comes out and asks for a refill again
>as I am refilling it I notice what look like pubic hairs
>I give it back to her
>she sits where she originally sat
>then suddenly starts talking to no one(she is the only one in the restaurant)
>then starts screaming at the top of her lungs
>terrified me is watching this all go down
>she then screams and runs out of the restaurant
>manager comes from back to see if I'm okay
>I look at him like "where were you...."

True ******* story.
#80 to #78 - alboorack (04/11/2013) [-]
Hiding....
#85 to #78 - ianus (04/11/2013) [-]
let me guess, yfw he came back (changing text, sry i can't manipulate almighty gifs)
let me guess, yfw he came back (changing text, sry i can't manipulate almighty gifs)
#9 - awesomerunner (04/11/2013) [-]
>not mine   
>my brother, 16 working at Mcdonalds   
>He has to work the night shift   
>Crazy lady comes in at 2 am   
>she wants coffee   
> The coffee machine has been turned off already   
>My brother tells her she is going to have to wait 10 min if she wants her coffee   
>She flips a 			****		   
>She steps on to the counter and starts rampaging   
> My brother calms her down finally   
>My brother asks if she still wants coffee she says no   
> She wants Orange Juice   
>Takes 10 min to make orange juice because it was already turned off   
> My brother tells her   
>He gets slapped and she leaves   
>mfw noone else was there to witness this because it was night shift and no one believes him except me
>not mine
>my brother, 16 working at Mcdonalds
>He has to work the night shift
>Crazy lady comes in at 2 am
>she wants coffee
> The coffee machine has been turned off already
>My brother tells her she is going to have to wait 10 min if she wants her coffee
>She flips a ****
>She steps on to the counter and starts rampaging
> My brother calms her down finally
>My brother asks if she still wants coffee she says no
> She wants Orange Juice
>Takes 10 min to make orange juice because it was already turned off
> My brother tells her
>He gets slapped and she leaves
>mfw noone else was there to witness this because it was night shift and no one believes him except me
User avatar #10 to #9 - sirbrentcoe (04/11/2013) [-]
the OJ machine never goes off at McDonalds though, unless it's off for cleaning... what a cunt-o-matic
User avatar #12 to #9 - dafuqisdisshit (04/11/2013) [-]
Video?
User avatar #16 to #12 - awesomerunner (04/11/2013) [-]
sadly no so you can choose to belive it or you dont either way i find it funny
User avatar #24 to #16 - weinerdick ONLINE (04/11/2013) [-]
No, no, like surveillance footage
#153 to #9 - adrianoc (04/11/2013) [-]
I read "night shift" as " ***** **** ". Man was I confused at the beginning.
#19 - rangider (04/11/2013) [-]
Im afraid I can't let you do that Dave.
User avatar #20 to #19 - sirbrentcoe (04/11/2013) [-]
only took 8 hours, i'm proud of you rangider
User avatar #21 to #20 - rangider (04/11/2013) [-]
Haha thanks man! Just finished the book. Have you read it?
User avatar #22 to #21 - sirbrentcoe (04/11/2013) [-]
not for a long time. I'm re-reading the LOTR/Hobbit quadroligy right now.
User avatar #23 to #22 - rangider (04/11/2013) [-]
Nice! Finished rereading the hobbit the other month. The book put the movie to shame (Doesn't it always?) Glad you appreciated the comment! Cheers man!
#14 - josieabby (04/11/2013) [-]
When I worked at McDonald's, I'd go back and steal the pickle slices and put them over my nipples.  I would go all day sporting my saltly/sweet secret underneath my lingerie.  I felt like such a badass.  Then at the end of the day, on one of my last orders, I would wait for someone to order a McDouble 'for here'... I would sneak around to the kitchen and put my boobie slices on their burger.  After they received their order I would watch them eat the McDouble.  The joy and arousal I got from watching them chew, swallow, and digest the pickles that were in contact with my skin was almost orgasmic.  To think that someones body was holding a little part of me inside them made me feel dominate.  Like a man.  Like I was completing a metamorphosis that would one day save humanity.  I was winning.   
   
(author unknown)
When I worked at McDonald's, I'd go back and steal the pickle slices and put them over my nipples. I would go all day sporting my saltly/sweet secret underneath my lingerie. I felt like such a badass. Then at the end of the day, on one of my last orders, I would wait for someone to order a McDouble 'for here'... I would sneak around to the kitchen and put my boobie slices on their burger. After they received their order I would watch them eat the McDouble. The joy and arousal I got from watching them chew, swallow, and digest the pickles that were in contact with my skin was almost orgasmic. To think that someones body was holding a little part of me inside them made me feel dominate. Like a man. Like I was completing a metamorphosis that would one day save humanity. I was winning.

(author unknown)
User avatar #114 to #14 - SonofChuck (04/11/2013) [-]
And that's why I ask them to hold the pickles on my burgers.
User avatar #131 to #14 - HARDSTYLESHUFFLER (04/11/2013) [-]
Jokes on you, I take the pickles off!
User avatar #45 to #14 - drastronomy (04/11/2013) [-]
but....fat people
#102 to #14 - theflamingfire (04/11/2013) [-]
But....but i ordered a McDouble like the story mfw
#93 to #14 - anon (04/11/2013) [-]
I completely understand why you have no significant other.
#18 to #14 - ninonybox (04/11/2013) [-]
Comment Picture
#30 to #14 - izzygirl ONLINE (04/11/2013) [-]
#65 to #14 - oceanfrank (04/11/2013) [-]
I've had to use 3 i dont even pictures in the last 2 days.... Funnyjunk is going hardbody with these what the **** stories.
#15 to #14 - sirbrentcoe (04/11/2013) [-]
...guh
...guh
#109 to #14 - hanakoikezawa (04/11/2013) [-]
yfw I don't eat pickles
#146 to #109 - atma (04/11/2013) [-]
yfw you were the culprit all along
yfw you were the culprit all along
#38 to #14 - DevDizzy ONLINE (04/11/2013) [-]
Reminds me of the Ass Pennies.

www.youtube.com/watch?v=DO1Q7F23DxM
#39 to #38 - josieabby (04/11/2013) [-]
"You throw my ass pennies in fountains and make wishes on them."
"You throw my ass pennies in fountains and make wishes on them."
#99 - mrdrpage (04/11/2013) [-]
>Be me, 19
>Go in McDonalds
>Hot chick behind register 8.5/10
>Order 2 McDoubles and a large drink
>She says "Oh I get that all the time!"
>Bonding
>feelsgoodman.jpg
>I ask her how much I owe her
>She says "I need about tree fiddy."
>Well it was about that time I noticed the hot girl behind the register was a 3 story tall crustacean from the Paleozoic Era.
>I said, "DAMMIT YOU LOCH NESS MONSTER! YOU AIN'T GETTIN' MY TREE FIDDY!"
>MFW
0
#144 to #99 - egotistical has deleted their comment [-]
#145 to #99 - egotistical (04/11/2013) [-]
**egotistical rolled a random image posted in comment #409276 at Video Games Board - console gaming, pc vs console gaming, video console and games **....So what happened to the 2 McDoubles and large drink?
#120 - studbeefpile (04/11/2013) [-]
>tries to eat 150 chicken nuggets
User avatar #84 - gglai (04/11/2013) [-]
Mcstorytime

>Order Mcdonalds online
>Order large fries
>Got small fries instead
:(
User avatar #108 to #84 - elmarcocfc (04/11/2013) [-]
There's a McDonalds online? :O
User avatar #121 to #84 - madeyoulooknana (04/11/2013) [-]
. .. .ONLINE?
#89 to #84 - Logicaltightrope (04/11/2013) [-]
It's a sign.

Stop eating.
User avatar #111 to #84 - tocoolforyouinajar (04/11/2013) [-]
When you're to lazy to walk across the corner, and just buy mcdonalds, its time to start ordering small fries.
User avatar #82 - banditmuffin (04/11/2013) [-]
>Be 16 working overnight shift at McDonalds
>3 AM Watching on cameras as car approaches order box
>Two black women get out of the car, one pulls down her pants and starts pissing in the bushes
>Turn on headset
>"Ma'am...we can see you on camera"
>Woman gets so startled, she trips, rolling out of the bushes and into the pavement, pants down, piss following her
>Her friend was clapping her hands, jumping from foot to foot and spinning in circles, laughing
>Compose themselves after a minute, get back in car, order 6 Jr chickens like nothing happened

User avatar #1 - oldsandwich (04/10/2013) [-]
I hope he vomited in the same ****** garbage bag
User avatar #2 to #1 - sirbrentcoe (04/10/2013) [-]
wasn't on the same day, it was a couple of months down the road. our old store manager actually requested a transfer because of the previous incident.
User avatar #3 to #2 - oldsandwich (04/10/2013) [-]
shshshhshh don't ruin the fantasy for me

I'm just imaging the same can with rotten **** in it that nobody has touched for months because as soon as anybody is asked to take it out y'all quit on the spot and they actually need to have a staffed restaurant so they let it slide
#63 - bioscott (04/11/2013) [-]
RANCH Mutha ***** do you eat it?
#62 - ncisagentgibbs **User deleted account** (04/11/2013) [-]
you go noooooow!!!!!
User avatar #157 - phoenix grinder (04/11/2013) [-]
hey, it's a rough life being a trucker. the combination of high and lonely manifests itself in a hungry belligerence that can't be sated
#155 - MrMeatStick (04/11/2013) [-]
Comment Picture
#130 - jameshill (04/11/2013) [-]
My good sir i think you meant to say Disasters sorry for the Nazism
#135 to #130 - killyojoy (04/11/2013) [-]
Because correcting someone's spelling should be compared to 6 million jews.
#140 to #135 - jameshill (04/11/2013) [-]
OK Mr.Dickbutt i must inform you that if you are going to correct at least be accurate there was a total of 5.9 million Jews, and a grand total of 11 million trust me I'm a doctor
#142 to #140 - anon (04/11/2013) [-]
"Trust me A Doctor!!! I'M"
#141 to #140 - killyojoy (04/11/2013) [-]
1) I rounded  2) I didn't say the Nazis killed a grand total of 6 million I said 6 million Jews.
1) I rounded 2) I didn't say the Nazis killed a grand total of 6 million I said 6 million Jews.
User avatar #143 to #141 - jameshill (04/11/2013) [-]
i know man i am playing bro chill, funny gif tho :p
+5
#101 - russianbro has deleted their comment [-]
#42 - anon (04/11/2013) [-]
>Be me, overweight truck driver
>One day, high as high can be
>Decide to order a king's ransom of McNuggets
>Look at cashier, not sure if I remember him
>Cashier looks sacred ********
>"Sorry sir, we can't fill out your order."
#43 to #42 - anon (04/11/2013) [-]
>WTF.jpg
>Start flipping **** because reasons
>Flush 30 McNuggets into the void that it my mouth
>McNuggets and my digestive system engage in an epic battle
>Puke
>McNuggets won
>Run outside
>Get in my truck
#44 to #43 - anon (04/11/2013) [-]
>Beep beep beep
>Vroom
>Gone
And I didn't even pay
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