Are there directions?. . A manna spa. needs about 20 German men and the threat about a world war to make it happen? Grafenberg is a liar
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[ 192 comments ]
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#15 - neverbeing (04/05/2013) [-]
needs about 20 German men and the threat about a world war to make it happen?
+53
#122 - whataloser **User deleted account** has deleted their comment [-]
#53 - wholesomeburn (04/06/2013) [-]
Engineer's face when...
Engineer's face when...
#29 - MattSwan (04/06/2013) [-]
You don't know how to please a woman?
-10
#38 to #29 - slenderwolf has deleted their comment [-]
User avatar #174 to #38 - wtfduud (04/06/2013) [-]
It was an april fools joke.
-5
#36 to #29 - thereasonableperso has deleted their comment [-]
User avatar #51 to #36 - Nullifier (04/06/2013) [-]
I'm not sure if you were trying to be hilariously wrong there or not...
#13 - spongebrad (04/05/2013) [-]
Sounds like Seamen could help in your current situation... getting the sub to work anyway....
#150 to #13 - suchtino (04/06/2013) [-]
hehehe


seaman
User avatar #97 to #13 - deathstare (04/06/2013) [-]
On one hand having your seamen arrive before the action is great! On the other hand...
User avatar #31 - LiveDarkness (04/06/2013) [-]
"Oh you didnt cum?,........damn thats a shame, welp goodnight"
User avatar #39 to #31 - ilovehitler (04/06/2013) [-]
And then you sleep on the couch.
User avatar #33 - twinnedorphan (04/06/2013) [-]
at least the sub gets wet.
#47 - axeaddonis (04/06/2013) [-]
This guy knows.
0
#170 to #47 - sinceresandwich **User deleted account** has deleted their comment [-]
#85 to #47 - guruxz (04/06/2013) [-]
ohh dear god yes timesplitters
#140 to #85 - enorus (04/06/2013) [-]
Classics. The Timesplitters games are still among the most fun ways to kill you friends imo.
Classics. The Timesplitters games are still among the most fun ways to kill you friends imo.
#123 - usmcoorah (04/06/2013) [-]
Clit.   
   
   
Rhythm.    
   
   
Bang. Got yourself an orgasm.
Clit.


Rhythm.


Bang. Got yourself an orgasm.
User avatar #141 to #123 - weldbot (04/06/2013) [-]
Bada ************* bing, bada ************* boom.

Truth.

You heard it from White Goodman himself.
User avatar #193 to #141 - usmcoorah (04/06/2013) [-]
"Its me, White. W-h-i-t......E"
#43 - tvrulestwo (04/06/2013) [-]
You need forty germans to get the job done?
#30 - justsomeunitedguy (04/06/2013) [-]
you just need some magical fingers
you just need some magical fingers
User avatar #160 - jinxter (04/06/2013) [-]
She's 73 years old?
#24 - Crusader (04/06/2013) [-]
In both situation if you bang it hard enough with a hammer a few times, it stops being so finicky.
-1
#28 to #24 - alreadyexiststho has deleted their comment [-]
User avatar #71 - truemox ONLINE (04/06/2013) [-]
That sub is from 1918.
#101 - psychosamm (04/06/2013) [-]
**psychosamm rolled a random image posted in comment #19483 at Anime board social ** Have you tried turning it off and on again?
User avatar #115 to #101 - illusiveman (04/06/2013) [-]
this pic is really really related.
0
#118 to #115 - illusiveman has deleted their comment [-]
#130 to #101 - raexe (04/06/2013) [-]
Relevant roll.
Relevant roll.
#52 - splitpeasoup (04/06/2013) [-]
Just fill it with semen.
#49 - Temari (04/06/2013) [-]
I know this is a joke, but here are my professional sex tips:

-Tease her *
-Flick her clit (with your tongue)
-Spell out the alphabet with your tongue (on her clit) **
-Suck her clit
-Maybe lightly bite her clit (with her permission) ***
-Stick a finger or two inside her vagina while doing the above to her clit
-Find her g-spot (inner wall of her vagina, insert a finger or two inside, then make a come hither motion against the inner wall of her vagina, like the wall closer to her clit) with your fingers and play with it while you do all that good stuff to her clit
-Let her sit on your face so that she can control the oral sex, if you're licking too gently, she won't enjoy it. But, if she is on top, she can control how much pressure, she can move her pussy against your tongue however she wants it, etc.
-Let her be on top (it really is a good idea to let her be on top, as some men really are awful on top. Sorry to say it, but its true), and tell her to face you, and lean back. Your dick will hit her GSpot and it'll feel great for her.
-Remember, (most) women can have multiple orgasms, so 1 or 2 really doesn't cut it. Try for 3 at least. ****
[Combined, this'll definitely make her come]

*Kiss her thighs, lick her pussy lips, lick the entire length from her vagina hole to above her clit, etc. Foreplay in general should make her be practically begging for it, so if you tease her, she will really want it!
**That is a well known tip because it takes some time, and it will make your tongue pay attention to all of her clit. You'll probably have to go through a few alphabets before she comes.
***Don't hurt her, unless she's into that. Again, ask her permission, and be gentle until she asks for more. Don't chomp down on it, clits are sensitive as hell.
****Of course, every woman is different, but I can have like 12 orgasms at a time, and I honestly am really bored if I don't have at least 5 or so. Ask her how many orgasms she can take.
#172 to #49 - anon (04/06/2013) [-]
All the above are pretty good advice tips and thanks for sharing.

One thing though.... The Cowgirl position may be true but if your the guy, dont do it, unless you like having your dick bent. ( It hurts, trust me, not enjoyable... maybe for her.) If you are going to do that, at least go Reverse Cowgirl. Enjoyable for both parties with less dick bending..... Only downside is its less intimate and more of a on top doggy style.
#67 to #49 - anon (04/06/2013) [-]
You can actually see where her fat ass belly has been pressing against her pants because she's, well, fat. Put that ****** dog back in it's cage, God damn.
#95 to #74 - tbagbandit (04/06/2013) [-]
I 			*******		 love you
I ******* love you
#167 to #74 - anon (04/06/2013) [-]
U MAD?
Y U MAD THOUGH?
User avatar #69 to #67 - Leopard (04/06/2013) [-]
I think she's slimmer then average.
User avatar #56 to #49 - mrgoodlove (04/06/2013) [-]
Usually make her cum 2 to 5 times with fingers/ tongue before you even think of sticking your dick in her, unless you can keep that **** hard for a solid 30 minutes. Body surfing is also a good position to hit the G spot. Have the girl lay on her stomach with a pillow under then mount her and go to town.
User avatar #57 to #56 - Temari (04/06/2013) [-]
yep, also important advice! women really arent ready to take a dick until they've had a few orgasms. ran out of room before i could type that.
User avatar #59 to #57 - mrgoodlove (04/06/2013) [-]
They don't call me mrgoodlove for nothing
User avatar #100 to #57 - mrgoodlove (04/06/2013) [-]
Also, I don't know if a guy has ever done this to you but

Protip: Hum while you're eating her out. The vibrations will drive her crazy.
User avatar #110 to #100 - Temari (04/06/2013) [-]
heh, I'm a lesbian, so yeah. the first woman i ever slept with taught me that. great stuff. it drives women crazy
#187 to #56 - anon (04/06/2013) [-]
well, yesterday my gf was little disapoitned because i ended so fast(we ****** for 20min, at least, but just when she started to enjoy, i started to enjoy to much and finished and she was little mad. Well round two, she was begging me to stop. My tongue hurt so bad but it was wort it
User avatar #194 to #187 - mrgoodlove (04/06/2013) [-]
That a boy. Satisfy your woman at all costs!
+2
#94 to #49 - maucorn **User deleted account** has deleted their comment [-]
User avatar #61 to #49 - rplix (04/06/2013) [-]
I am going to print this and keep it with me so I don't forget when the moment comes!
User avatar #104 to #49 - vortexrain (04/06/2013) [-]
I'm a virgin, and this girl that I'd like to actually get to know before we do anything is a virgin as well. I hope things get far enough for me to be able to. She told me that he mom doesn't let her buy tampons, and that she's never mastubater before. When the time comes (hehe) I'm going to destroy her with the sexual info that I've gotten from this site.
#189 to #104 - adamks (04/06/2013) [-]
It will be five glorius seconds!
#54 to #49 - williaint (04/06/2013) [-]
-Spell out the alphabet with your tongue (on her clit) **   
" A for Alfred, B for Batman, C for Catwoman"   
please someone get this reference.....   
   
< pic only related because of batman
-Spell out the alphabet with your tongue (on her clit) **
" A for Alfred, B for Batman, C for Catwoman"
please someone get this reference.....

< pic only related because of batman
#62 to #60 - williaint (04/06/2013) [-]
Comment Picture
0
#76 to #54 - captan **User deleted account** has deleted their comment [-]
#133 - eyeblowbarrs (04/06/2013) [-]
**eyeblowbarrs rolls 19**
#136 to #135 - eyeblowbarrs (04/06/2013) [-]
**eyeblowbarrs rolls 56**
#146 to #137 - ballerfifteen (04/06/2013) [-]
**ballerfifteen rolls 07**
**ballerfifteen rolls 07**
#8 - rockstarownage ONLINE (04/05/2013) [-]
i honestly thing the sub would be easier
User avatar #9 to #8 - pompladouche (04/05/2013) [-]
how about if the wheels on the sub changed purpose with every change in mood?
#10 to #9 - rockstarownage ONLINE (04/05/2013) [-]
true
#155 - mathafaka (04/06/2013) [-]
like they were easy to controll nowadays...

just sayin
User avatar #171 to #155 - Mahazama (04/06/2013) [-]
They are definitely a lot easier to manage, given that you can interface with all the crazy ass variables and the computer takes on a lot of the tedious workload.
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