Why'd Jesus quit playing hockey?. Because he kept getting nailed to the boards! Why do girls like jesus? Cause he was hung like this! stretches arms out. Denon
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Why'd Jesus quit playing hockey?

Because he kept getting nailed to the boards!

Why do girls like jesus? Cause he was hung like this! *stretches arms out*

Denon roe
scizzor:
butth OWE
Host attended the best passion of the Christ play. As
they were "nailing" Jesus to the cross the entire thing
broke. No one knew What to do and it got quiet. Finally
one of the guards on stage said "You get out of it this
time Jesus"
I CAN' T STOP ******* LAUGHING NOBODY LOOK AT ME
ITS BACK
...
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Views: 29812
Favorited: 126
Submitted: 04/03/2013
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User avatar #4 - deescalation ONLINE (04/04/2013) [+] (17 replies)
"I can't stop ******* laughing, nobody look at me" -the sentence that killed the post
#3 - payseht (04/04/2013) [-]
This image has expired
I saw a movie where Jesus got nailed

they took a lot of liberties from the source material...
#18 - thevoididoidi (04/04/2013) [+] (1 reply)
Hey that's bad, they were only trying to save him from the aliens
#9 - sonofmymother (04/04/2013) [-]
I am so done with this site
#13 - motherfuckingkenji (04/04/2013) [+] (4 replies)
STORY TIME!   
One year when I was at Bible camp (Even though I'm atheist. Don't ask.), we had this guy with Down Syndrome named Jesse.   
On a scale of Po to tato, he was pretty downy, but he was a really cool guy and we became friends while we were there.   
Around the last day we were there, there was a "talent show", where anyone could go up on stage in front of the whole camp and 						****					 around really (Our cabin sung Amazing Grace as Arnold Schwarzenegger, the camp nurse played spoons, 						****					 was quite cash, old chap.). Every year he was there, Jesse always did a sort of Passion of the Christ play where he would have a couple counselors pretend to whip him and nail him to a cross and whatnot. There wasn't any talking, just an "ugh!" after each arm movement. When they put him in the tomb, he waited 5 seconds before standing up and shouting in his potatoey way "I'M ALIIIIVE!"   
Now, I wasn't there at the tomb a few thousand years ago, but I don't think that's what Jesus said when he got out of there.   
   
TL:DR a story that might make you exhale through your nose a bit.
STORY TIME!
One year when I was at Bible camp (Even though I'm atheist. Don't ask.), we had this guy with Down Syndrome named Jesse.
On a scale of Po to tato, he was pretty downy, but he was a really cool guy and we became friends while we were there.
Around the last day we were there, there was a "talent show", where anyone could go up on stage in front of the whole camp and **** around really (Our cabin sung Amazing Grace as Arnold Schwarzenegger, the camp nurse played spoons, **** was quite cash, old chap.). Every year he was there, Jesse always did a sort of Passion of the Christ play where he would have a couple counselors pretend to whip him and nail him to a cross and whatnot. There wasn't any talking, just an "ugh!" after each arm movement. When they put him in the tomb, he waited 5 seconds before standing up and shouting in his potatoey way "I'M ALIIIIVE!"
Now, I wasn't there at the tomb a few thousand years ago, but I don't think that's what Jesus said when he got out of there.

TL:DR a story that might make you exhale through your nose a bit.
#23 - redtooth ONLINE (04/04/2013) [-]
#37 - thebritishguy (04/04/2013) [+] (1 reply)
User avatar #38 - anonefg **User deleted account** (04/04/2013) [+] (1 reply)
XD LEPIC XDDD IM LE DONE LE 2 KINDS OF PEOPLE XDD :DDDDD EVERY1 IS ON DRUGSZZZZZZ LE EPIC REPOST 9GAGJUNK XDDDD :DDDDD :PP
#42 to #38 - anonymous (04/04/2013) [-]
Shut up.
#10 - wafflepan (04/04/2013) [+] (2 replies)
Do people find it funny when people post comments like...
"OH MY GAWD IM LAUGHING I CANT SOMEONE HELP I CAN'T"
User avatar #46 - cossackwhoop (04/04/2013) [-]
Oh Stamper...
#45 - fonzythekid (04/04/2013) [+] (1 reply)
MFW I thought the title had something to do with the picture...
#39 - critique (04/04/2013) [-]
Lucky, Jesus...
User avatar #29 - mrgoodlove (04/04/2013) [-]
What's the difference between Jesus and a picture of Jesus?

It only takes one nail to put up the picture.
User avatar #2 - fourtwentt ONLINE (04/03/2013) [-]
thumbed for the desc not the repost
#6 - anonymous (04/04/2013) [-]
Wasn't this taken from a facebook post or something.
User avatar #1 - epicwinone (04/03/2013) [-]
i think its a repost......

but its still really funny.
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