They have no idea. lulz ensured.. Then you have to either 1) talk loudly- making your mother wonder what the is going on. 2) Talk normally- exposing your lie to your girlfriend. They have no idea lulz ensured Then you to either 1) talk loudly- making your mother wonder what the is going on 2) Talk normally- exposing lie girlfriend
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#3 - solitaryweasel
Reply +203
(03/27/2013) [-]
Then you have to either
1) talk loudly- making your mother wonder what the **** is going on.
2) Talk normally- exposing your lie to your girlfriend.
#15 to #3 - anon
Reply 0
(03/27/2013) [-]
3) You could address both people at the same time.
#22 to #3 - nagafever
Reply 0
(03/28/2013) [-]
or he can claim to have lost his voice
#16 to #3 - guythatagrees
Reply +3
(03/27/2013) [-]
You could talk like you're talking to a retard, in order to make the impression that you are making your girlfriend feel better.
#41 to #3 - thatkiddonovan
Reply +11
(03/28/2013) [-]
MOM-THIS-IS-KATIE
KATIE-THIS-IS-MOM

Both will think you are speaking that way for the other person

later "sorry mom, katie has problems when i talk normally"
or "sorry katie, mom hasn't been the same lately."

problem solved
#4 to #3 - thatonesmartdude
Reply +38
(03/27/2013) [-]
3) Leave the room.
#14 to #4 - garagesale **User deleted account**
+21
has deleted their comment [-]
#48 to #14 - ddemiddon
Reply +6
(03/28/2013) [-]
5) **** bitches?
#5 - hkd
Reply +128
(03/27/2013) [-]
All great, until your mum tells everyone that you're dating a retard
#34 to #5 - alltimetens
Reply -3
(03/28/2013) [-]
an retard*
#57 to #34 - ltsparky ONLINE
Reply +3
(03/28/2013) [-]
#36 to #34 - iamscifer
Reply 0
(03/28/2013) [-]
in most cases you only use "an" when the next word starts with a vowel for the other cases its just "a"
#38 to #36 - alltimetens
Reply +1
(03/28/2013) [-]
But...but it was a joke. Ever heard of "an hero"?
#6 to #5 - mrgoodlove [OP]
Reply +27
(03/27/2013) [-]
There's some pretty hot retards dude.
#7 to #6 - oceanmist
Reply +30
(03/27/2013) [-]
Ya know, I honestly don't think I've ever seen one. Of course I've seen hot girls with IQ's that match the age they lost their virginity, but never a hot girl with an actual mental disability.
#19 to #7 - gloogy
Reply +29
(03/27/2013) [-]
"I've seen hot girls with IQ's that match the age they lost their virginity"
That's the best thing I've heard in my life.
#8 to #7 - mrgoodlove [OP]
Reply +4
(03/27/2013) [-]
I know this doesn't count, but at my college there was a freakishly large amount of pretty deaf girls.
#9 to #8 - oceanmist
Reply +3
(03/27/2013) [-]
Thats like the perfect woman. At mine all we have is like a couple blind girls, and a girl who hiccups nonstop. The blind girls might be cute, but i feel like the whole blindness part makes it harder for them to take care of themselves visually, they always look like they just woke up and have a hangover.
#10 to #9 - mrgoodlove [OP]
Reply +13
(03/27/2013) [-]
Haha yea I could see how that would be a problem. Have you tried punching the hiccup girl in her throat?
#11 to #10 - hawaiikid
Reply +12
(03/27/2013) [-]
That escalated far, far too quickly.
#26 to #10 - thejerseyjenn
Reply +3
(03/28/2013) [-]
oh god i just did that weird hyperventilating laugh.
#20 to #10 - IAmManbearpig
Reply 0
(03/28/2013) [-]
my abs are very sore and you made me laugh rather hard.
**** you, good sir.
#21 to #20 - mrgoodlove [OP]
Reply 0
(03/28/2013) [-]
It's my solution for any female who is being annoying.
#23 to #21 - IAmManbearpig
Reply 0
(03/28/2013) [-]
naturally, but it was just so unexpected. caught me off guard.
#12 to #6 - frysandaburger
Reply -10
(03/27/2013) [-]
And they believe you when you tell them you cum frosting.
#17 - justleavefagmin
Reply +10
(03/27/2013) [-]
I'm curious what the profit would be.
#33 to #17 - lazragoon
Reply +1
(03/28/2013) [-]
Well basically you'd have two women talking to each other like they're talking to babies.
#24 to #17 - unclaimedusername
Reply +4
(03/28/2013) [-]
Trick mother into thinking girlfriend is retarded

??????

Profit
#18 to #17 - millenia
Reply +49
(03/27/2013) [-]
Hearty laughs, of course.
#43 to #18 - neverccd
Reply +3
(03/28/2013) [-]
Comment Picture
#39 - mytrakytra
Reply +44
(03/28/2013) [-]
Then your mom thinks your into tards.
#59 to #39 - dtcdannyboy
Reply -6
(03/28/2013) [-]
you're*
#72 to #59 - anon
Reply 0
(03/28/2013) [-]
deal with it faggot
#60 to #59 - ricrolledbitch
-1
has deleted their comment [-]
#62 to #60 - swagbot
Reply +3
(03/28/2013) [-]
uhhhh.... he's right.

YOUR into tards. Your what is into tards?
You're into tards. Your are into tards. Better.
#63 to #62 - ricrolledbitch
Reply +1
(03/28/2013) [-]
ah when i looked again i only read to the first your
#64 to #63 - swagbot
Reply +1
(03/28/2013) [-]
YOU'RE CURED SON! CURED!
#71 to #39 - anon
Reply 0
(03/28/2013) [-]
Downsyndromes get my dick so ************* hard you wont believe.
#29 - themastertroller
Reply +41
(03/28/2013) [-]
**themastertroller rolled a random image posted in comment #64 at this is our country ** mfw i date a retard
**themastertroller rolled a random image posted in comment #64 at this is our country ** mfw i date a retard
#28 - mrfourtysevenman
Reply +17
(03/28/2013) [-]
>find asshole number one one day
>i know where he lives
>he doesnt know exactly who i am
>get a call from asshole number 2 one day
>get in a fight over the phone
>tell him where i live
>give him asshole number 1's address
>call asshole number 1 and tell him im coming over to kick is ******* ass
>call the police and say "THERES 2 gay LOVERS IN A FIGHT NEXT DOOR"
>news comes by and films
>headline "gay throwdown"
what a day
#40 to #28 - anon
Reply 0
(03/28/2013) [-]
Why the **** is this faggot getting thumbs?
#42 to #28 - anon
Reply 0
(03/28/2013) [-]
WIFE / FEDS/ MEDFORD POLICE / NH POLICE / OHOH HIS BEW I AM SO NIT A CH EEA TEA ACT NOT GONNA CUT IT DINA!!! $$$$ HAHAHA. DIAMONDS ARE CUNT FOR EVER AAAAA IN A SMALLLL CHACHOTOTISIS CELL $$$ poor billy))))
#44 to #28 - mrblueftw
Reply 0
(03/28/2013) [-]
why would you turn a good story post into a crappy comment?
#52 to #28 - brothergrimm
Reply 0
(03/28/2013) [-]
although, lunacy is right. would've been much better in story format. not green text
although, lunacy is right. would've been much better in story format. not green text
#74 to #28 - LaBarata
Reply 0
(03/28/2013) [-]
Way to steal from 4chan
#32 to #28 - lunacy
Reply +31
(03/28/2013) [-]
Seriously? You took an epic story, left out all the details, and turned into ****** greentext format.
Seriously? You took an epic story, left out all the details, and turned into ****** greentext format.
#37 to #32 - owmowmow
0
has deleted their comment [-]
#31 - fortminorj
Reply +22
(03/28/2013) [-]
why isn't that a troll face? just saying, we can't lose touch here guys
#55 to #31 - raigen
Reply 0
(03/28/2013) [-]
I thought meme faces were hated.
#46 to #31 - skuser
Reply +5
(03/28/2013) [-]
Because someone did the gif this way
Because someone did the gif this way
#35 - vatra
Reply 0
(03/28/2013) [-]
At least OP is honest about his body shape.
#51 to #35 - zorororonoa
Reply +6
(03/28/2013) [-]
Once you accept it, you don't care who knows
#54 to #51 - vatra
Reply 0
(03/28/2013) [-]
Fair enough!
#47 - generaljackass
Reply +4
(03/28/2013) [-]
How is this remotely a good plan now there is a retard in the relationship. Hint it isn't the screaming bitch.
#2 - heretofuckshitup ONLINE
Reply +3
(03/27/2013) [-]
how would you have talked to either one with both in the room?