Excessive Masturbation. . After handing nut my resume nut be amand 'N, B , I just it says mien" under my hobbies... WHEN‘ Ne wonder I heven‘ t been getting any  Prank resume cv funny sibling brother excessive masturbation best hilarious
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Excessive Masturbation

After handing nut my resume nut be amand 'N,
B , I just ******* it says
mien" under my hobbies...
WHEN‘
Ne wonder I heven‘ t been getting any came
back. Them the last time I trust you to greet
read anything we ASSHOLE H with Jamar:
sand 311 timers like
this
5' 23 shares
in view 31 mere cerements
c?, Tag This Phatty
h' Ede Legall: -n
I Chang: eware
...
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Views: 61489
Favorited: 154
Submitted: 02/20/2013
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Comments(204):

[ 204 comments ]
What do you think? Give us your opinion. Anonymous comments allowed.
#149 - mishaestrin (02/21/2013) [-]
Real life
#150 to #149 - nirtse (02/21/2013) [-]
hahahaja
#193 to #150 - jakols (02/21/2013) [-]
you kinda sound like a stuttering ninja with tourettes about to smash some bricks...
"ha.,ha,ha.,haja!"
User avatar #40 - smittywrbmnjnsn (02/21/2013) [-]
I would hire that guy.



You can trust him not to take any money.



Because if he did, he'd tell you.
User avatar #61 to #40 - chuckbillrow (02/21/2013) [-]
yeah that kind of honesty at least deserves an interview
User avatar #38 - ponieskilledmyacc (02/21/2013) [-]
There's no such thing as "Excessive" masturbation.
User avatar #164 to #135 - rokkarokkaali (02/21/2013) [-]
42 is the meaning of life. You die if you don't send your sperm to the place that 'makes life' 42 times. It's all a conspiracy.
User avatar #51 to #38 - xyaleon (02/21/2013) [-]
Really? So if someone did it like every hour there wouldn't be something wrong with them? ._.
User avatar #58 to #51 - laky (02/21/2013) [-]
wait there's something wrong with you if you masturbate every hour?
#46 - anon (02/21/2013) [-]
I'm more impressed that he knows Macedonian.
User avatar #152 to #46 - kratosalza (02/21/2013) [-]
Have you considered that he himself might be Macedonian
#83 - auesis (02/21/2013) [-]
Honesty can land you a job more often than you know. I got fed up with all the failed interviews I'd had to get a ****** part-time job that I felt miserable in one particular interview.

"What do you think you can bring to this company?"

"A desperate man who will do anything he's told so long as he's paid for it."

I got the job.
#142 - biblioklept (02/21/2013) [-]
My hobby is computers
My hobby is computers
#90 - jalaven (02/21/2013) [-]
This is seriously a 			******		 thing to do. That could potentially black ball someone.
This is seriously a ****** thing to do. That could potentially black ball someone.
User avatar #99 to #90 - ldial (02/21/2013) [-]
That's funny but ****** .
#157 to #90 - swagbot (02/21/2013) [-]
only if people don't have a sense of humor.


oh, wait...
#163 - mrsoup (02/21/2013) [-]
one of my greatest hobbies
one of my greatest hobbies
User avatar #124 - nsfeverything (02/21/2013) [-]
who speaks macedonian?
User avatar #186 to #124 - corundum (02/21/2013) [-]
a couple million people
User avatar #137 to #124 - plainarcane **User deleted account** (02/21/2013) [-]
Nobody. Macedonian isn't a language.
#169 to #137 - themongoose ONLINE (02/21/2013) [-]
wiki/Macedonian_language
wiki/Macedonian_language
User avatar #141 to #137 - brothergrimm (02/21/2013) [-]
technically, we don't know that. Macedonia was an ancient civilization. it may have been a major language that is now dead..... like latin!
User avatar #143 to #141 - plainarcane **User deleted account** (02/21/2013) [-]
Technically yes we do know that. The Macedonians spoke Greek.
User avatar #144 to #143 - brothergrimm (02/21/2013) [-]
i was not aware of that.gif
User avatar #207 to #141 - ludislavonac (02/21/2013) [-]
It's not dead, there is a country called Macedonia you know
User avatar #133 to #124 - Faz (02/21/2013) [-]
Macedonians.
#129 to #124 - gojeda (02/21/2013) [-]
people who excessively masturbate
#105 - anon (02/21/2013) [-]
maybe you're not getting any calls because you can't spell socializing.
0
#180 to #105 - IamKirby has deleted their comment [-]
#179 to #105 - IamKirby (02/21/2013) [-]
oh because there's no possible way that he doesn't live in america.
#97 - gregredz (02/21/2013) [-]
Comment Picture
#151 - mishaestrin (02/21/2013) [-]
I proofread it for real this time -Jared
#147 - captainrobert (02/21/2013) [-]
that was 			*******		 funny
that was ******* funny
User avatar #122 - cumsinbucket (02/21/2013) [-]
I would've broke the proof readers legs
User avatar #138 to #122 - plainarcane **User deleted account** (02/21/2013) [-]
Me too. That's not even ******* funny.
#158 - burgessb (02/21/2013) [-]
i read that last part as bungeediving and sky jumping
User avatar #176 to #158 - thisisspartah (02/21/2013) [-]
i think you just came up with a new idea
#148 - macarenaoftime (02/21/2013) [-]
**macarenaoftime rolled a random image posted in comment #608981 at Friendly ** my secret hobby
#183 to #148 - anon (02/21/2013) [-]
can i call you if i feel like i need to be relieved of life like a good little anon?
#26 - nanapopo (02/21/2013) [-]
plus he spelled socializing incorrectly.
plus he spelled socializing incorrectly.
User avatar #30 to #26 - deathzor (02/21/2013) [-]
Nah, it's acceptable.
User avatar #39 to #30 - nanapopo (02/21/2013) [-]
my apologies
User avatar #44 to #39 - deathzor (02/21/2013) [-]
I told someone the spelling correction they made was incorrect and they were civil in responding to me.



There's hope yet for Funnyjunk!
User avatar #118 to #44 - nanapopo (02/21/2013) [-]
It happens. You just have to realize that many people on the internet either have the maturity of 12-year-olds, or are in fact 12.
User avatar #140 to #118 - deathzor (02/21/2013) [-]
You've got to love the underage douchebags....
#52 to #26 - montybalboa (02/21/2013) [-]
That is one creepy ass gif
+2
#188 - anonymouspusy **User deleted account** has deleted their comment [-]
User avatar #190 to #188 - breakfastskippa (02/21/2013) [-]
Maybe if your applying for a computer orientated job and your interests is computers, that might up your chances a little i dont know.
User avatar #197 to #188 - theshadowed (02/21/2013) [-]
Companies like to now about the person they're hiring
User avatar #202 to #188 - schneidend (02/21/2013) [-]
It's a resume. What goes on there is essentially up to you.
#218 to #188 - madebynorwegians (02/21/2013) [-]
Just found this .gif kinda cool xD
Just found this .gif kinda cool xD
User avatar #192 to #188 - beatmasterz (02/21/2013) [-]
Because employers want a serious person to hire and not one who makes jokes on his resume.
User avatar #194 to #192 - shadowbane (02/21/2013) [-]
I believe his question is why they were asking about his hobbies in the first place.
User avatar #203 to #194 - schneidend (02/21/2013) [-]
Nobody asked him about anything. It's a resume. You can put whatever you want on it.
User avatar #205 to #203 - shadowbane (02/21/2013) [-]
Er.. I only wish that were true.
User avatar #206 to #205 - schneidend (02/21/2013) [-]
Well, it is true. It's just that there are more successful things to put on it than others.
#178 - thisisspartah (02/21/2013) [-]
**thisisspartah rolled a random image posted in comment #3 at Old people **
my resume
#20 - felixjarl (02/21/2013) [-]
Roll a picture and commence furious masturbation to it, NO exceptions and NO excuses.
0
#50 to #20 - amirblumenfeld has deleted their comment [-]
#67 to #20 - blbrian (02/21/2013) [-]
**blbrian rolled a random image posted in comment #95 at Upskirt **
0
#92 to #20 - jinxbomb has deleted their comment [-]
#102 to #20 - krakalakin (02/21/2013) [-]
**krakalakin rolled a random image posted in comment #2997673 at MMORPG ITEM COLLECTIVE EXPERIENCE **
User avatar #103 to #102 - krakalakin (02/21/2013) [-]
*insert reason why I can't here*
User avatar #155 to #20 - thatkittyoverthere ONLINE (02/21/2013) [-]
*roll image*
#113 to #20 - applejaxl (02/21/2013) [-]
**applejaxl rolled a random image posted in comment #512570 at Friendly **
#55 to #20 - nelflover (02/21/2013) [-]
**nelflover rolled a random image posted in comment #496458 at Friendly **
#24 to #20 - withthelemons (02/21/2013) [-]
**withthelemons rolled a random image posted in comment #499846 at Friendly ** HERE WE GOOOO
#115 to #20 - salts (02/21/2013) [-]
**salts rolled a random image posted in comment #91 at It was worth it **
#167 to #20 - twi (02/21/2013) [-]
This image has expired
**twi rolled a random image posted in comment #89 at Danger **
okay
User avatar #168 to #167 - twi (02/21/2013) [-]
OH MY
#21 to #20 - arandomanon ONLINE (02/21/2013) [-]
**arandomanon rolled a random image posted in comment #68 at Actor Trivia Episode III: Revelations ** challence accepted
#47 to #20 - spyindisguise (02/21/2013) [-]
**spyindisguise rolled a random image posted in comment #89 at My face on the 14 february ** A man does not back down.
User avatar #64 to #47 - emmyizme (02/21/2013) [-]
**** that, I'd back down from this.
+7
#57 to #20 - jtdoggs **User deleted account** has deleted their comment [-]
#117 to #20 - watermelonmcnigger (02/21/2013) [-]
**			******************		 rolled a random image posted in comment #643935 at Friendly **
** ****************** rolled a random image posted in comment #643935 at Friendly **
0
#28 to #20 - Haentar has deleted their comment [-]
#27 to #20 - sckmybllz (02/21/2013) [-]
**sckmybllz rolled a random image posted in comment #3 at Well....this is a different view on this **
#199 to #20 - lapsushominum ONLINE (02/21/2013) [-]
**lapsushominum rolled a random image posted in comment #504178 at Anime & Manga - anime shows, anime games, anime art, manga ** Please be Rain Silves.
**lapsushominum rolled a random image posted in comment #504178 at Anime & Manga - anime shows, anime games, anime art, manga ** Please be Rain Silves.
User avatar #200 to #199 - lapsushominum ONLINE (02/21/2013) [-]
That's OK too, I suppose.
#100 to #20 - pulluspardus (02/21/2013) [-]
**pulluspardus rolled a random image posted in comment #527541 at Friendly ** I always roll good ones!
**pulluspardus rolled a random image posted in comment #527541 at Friendly ** I always roll good ones!
#101 to #100 - pulluspardus (02/21/2013) [-]
**pulluspardus rolled a random image posted in comment #2 at The next pope ** not today...
#111 to #20 - salts (02/21/2013) [-]
**salts rolled a random image posted in comment #2889360 at MMORPG ITEM COLLECTIVE EXPERIENCE **
#29 to #20 - tehskyizblue (02/21/2013) [-]
**tehskyizblue rolled a random image posted in comment #280181 at Pokemon **
#191 to #20 - greasynutsack (02/21/2013) [-]
**greasynutsack rolled a random image posted in comment #3002246 at MMORPG ITEM COLLECTIVE EXPERIENCE **
#72 to #20 - doctorhorrible (02/21/2013) [-]
**doctorhorrible rolled a random image posted in comment #58 at Valentine's Day **
**doctorhorrible rolled a random image posted in comment #58 at Valentine's Day **
#84 to #20 - GOTTACATCHEMALL (02/21/2013) [-]
This image has expired
**GOTTACATCHEMALL rolled a random image posted in comment #540623 at Friendly **
#81 to #20 - philliyoMLB (02/21/2013) [-]
**philliyoMLB rolled a random image posted in comment #24 at What time is it? **
#45 to #20 - justthisonepost **User deleted account** (02/21/2013) [-]
**justthisonepost rolled a random image posted in comment #271428 at Pokemon **
#87 to #20 - puredeliciousness ONLINE (02/21/2013) [-]
**puredeliciousness rolled a random image posted in comment #3020670 at My Little Pony fanfiction, backgrounds, songs, lyrics, and GIFs. ** .....This is exactly what it looks like.
#35 to #20 - secretdestroyers (02/21/2013) [-]
**secretdestroyers rolled a random image posted in comment #643531 at Friendly **
#63 to #20 - thisdoescompute (02/21/2013) [-]
**thisdoescompute rolled a random image posted in comment #540006 at Friendly **
#85 to #20 - jacksterlad (02/21/2013) [-]
**jacksterlad rolled a random image posted in comment #51 at Bush's only good decision **
**jacksterlad rolled a random image posted in comment #51 at Bush's only good decision **
User avatar #86 to #85 - jacksterlad (02/21/2013) [-]
its possible
#56 to #20 - residentblackman (02/21/2013) [-]
**residentblackman rolled a random image posted in comment #92 at Cannot decide ** let's go ***** !
#32 to #20 - taintedangel (02/21/2013) [-]
**taintedangel rolled a random image posted in comment #206561 at Ponyville ** Let it begin.
**taintedangel rolled a random image posted in comment #206561 at Ponyville ** Let it begin.
0
#211 to #20 - ghostrollerelite has deleted their comment [-]
#60 to #20 - inuk (02/21/2013) [-]
**inuk rolled a random image posted in comment #50 at Relatable Anime **
**inuk rolled a random image posted in comment #50 at Relatable Anime **
#165 to #20 - rokkarokkaali (02/21/2013) [-]
**rokkarokkaali rolled a random image posted in comment #4 at This is just cruel... **
#213 to #20 - knighttheknight (02/21/2013) [-]
**knighttheknight rolled a random image posted in comment #27 at MLP: Princess fight(Commissioned) **
**knighttheknight rolled a random image posted in comment #27 at MLP: Princess fight(Commissioned) **
#112 to #20 - salts (02/21/2013) [-]
**salts rolled a random image posted in comment #45 at Just sharing my wallpaper **
#212 to #20 - ghostrollerelite (02/21/2013) [-]
**ghostrollerelite rolled a random image posted in comment #153 at Fucking North Korea, dude **
#96 to #20 - unbentgodfather (02/21/2013) [-]
**unbentgodfather rolled a random image posted in comment #68 at Fucking Lilly.. **
#184 to #20 - dmkstarstar (02/21/2013) [-]
**dmkstarstar rolled a random image posted in comment #61 at Sad Name ** Here goes nothing or at least my life if I eff up.
User avatar #187 to #184 - dmkstarstar (02/21/2013) [-]
Hey he's a 40 year old man I'm at masturbating so this won't take long!
But like the guy below me is suicide an option?!?
-1
#93 to #20 - jinxbomb has deleted their comment [-]
User avatar #175 to #173 - arstya (02/21/2013) [-]
...is suicide an option?
#181 to #175 - anon (02/21/2013) [-]
SHUT UP AN FAP
User avatar #182 to #181 - arstya (02/21/2013) [-]
Guess it's off to the **** brony board...
#161 to #20 - alldaypk (02/21/2013) [-]
**alldaypk rolled a random image posted in comment #3218919 at My Little Pony fanfiction, backgrounds, songs, lyrics, and GIFs. ** here goes nothing!
#162 to #161 - alldaypk (02/21/2013) [-]
ohhh **** !
0
#70 to #20 - dickcockpenisetc has deleted their comment [-]
#65 to #20 - emmyizme (02/21/2013) [-]
**emmyizme rolled a random image posted in comment #3128139 at My Little Pony fanfiction, backgrounds, songs, lyrics, and GIFs. **

...I'm at work, this could get interesting.
#125 to #20 - sirbutterballs (02/21/2013) [-]
**sirbutterballs rolled a random image posted in comment #311 at when you see it **
User avatar #126 to #125 - sirbutterballs (02/21/2013) [-]
This is the stupidest most irrelevant roll ever.
#53 to #20 - hadokendude (02/21/2013) [-]
**hadokendude rolled a random image posted in comment #19 at Never Ending Road **
**hadokendude rolled a random image posted in comment #19 at Never Ending Road **
#116 to #20 - salts (02/21/2013) [-]
**salts rolled a random image posted in comment #611586 at Friendly **
#48 to #20 - dirtyheron (02/21/2013) [-]
**dirtyheron rolled a random image posted in comment #152 at Fact of the Day **
#82 to #20 - truelunar (02/21/2013) [-]
**truelunar rolled a random image posted in comment #635847 at Friendly ** ok lets see where this goes
**truelunar rolled a random image posted in comment #635847 at Friendly ** ok lets see where this goes
#43 to #20 - JohnE (02/21/2013) [-]
**JohnE rolled a random image posted in comment #29 at Can i come over? **
#36 to #20 - kevinzheng (02/21/2013) [-]
**kevinzheng rolled a random image posted in comment #14 at JR's new show **
#78 to #20 - iaminfactawizard (02/21/2013) [-]
**iaminfactawizard rolled a random image posted in comment #587310 at Friendly **
#31 to #20 - deathzor (02/21/2013) [-]
**deathzor rolled a random image posted in comment #32 at WAAAGH ** aight
#77 to #20 - fatspartan (02/21/2013) [-]
**fatspartan rolled a random image posted in comment #2906427 at MMORPG ITEM COLLECTIVE EXPERIENCE **
**fatspartan rolled a random image posted in comment #2906427 at MMORPG ITEM COLLECTIVE EXPERIENCE **
#22 to #20 - whycanticaps (02/21/2013) [-]
**whycanticaps rolled a random image posted in comment #447 at Too much ** Oooooh Myyy
#69 to #20 - chayio (02/21/2013) [-]
**chayio rolled a random image posted in comment #38 at Rides! **
#123 to #20 - Durp (02/21/2013) [-]
**Durp rolled a random image posted in comment #27 at In the moment **   
Ohohoh
**Durp rolled a random image posted in comment #27 at In the moment **
Ohohoh
[ 204 comments ]
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