Virgin mary. www.facebook.com/noblemanlyfe.. That part is a little questionable. Virgin mary tumblr faggot
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What do you think? Give us your opinion. Anonymous comments allowed.
#36 - sniffalot (02/01/2013) [-]
That part is a little questionable.
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#51 to #36 - subjectzerojack **User deleted account** has deleted their comment [-]
User avatar #2 - thepyras (02/01/2013) [-]
I don't think many people believed Mary either at the time, but this is one of the things I've thought for Joseph many times. It would be really difficult for me to go through with marrying my fiance who was pregnant with a child that wasn't mine. That takes dedication.
User avatar #50 to #2 - admiralen ONLINE (02/01/2013) [-]
it wasnt that unusual at the time, it is believed she was raped by a roman centurion
User avatar #3 to #2 - semisane (02/01/2013) [-]
Or he was a major ******* beta.
User avatar #18 to #3 - bokkos (02/01/2013) [-]
Cuckold Joseph they used to call him.
#28 - anon (02/01/2013) [-]
Is it possible to be an atheist and not show your ass every chance you get?
#67 to #28 - anon (02/01/2013) [-]
I'm an atheist and I know it's possible not to show my ass every chance I get.
#29 to #28 - anon (02/01/2013) [-]
asking someone reasonable questions about why they have chosen their particular faith, is not atheism.
User avatar #49 to #29 - fishtacos (02/01/2013) [-]
No, but asking someone to explain the unexplainable then acting like some genius when they can't or won't explain it is internet atheism.
User avatar #43 to #28 - taintedangel (02/01/2013) [-]
Yes, anon. But it's really ******* hard not to when you're surrounded by alot of idiocy.
#57 to #43 - anon (02/01/2013) [-]
> ALOT
> A LOT
> You suck A LOT of black dick.
User avatar #37 - konradkurze (02/01/2013) [-]
well it worked on that retarded US soldier who was in the middle east then came back to his girl and a black baby
, his girlfriend said she got pregnant watching interracial porn in 3d
User avatar #55 to #37 - emmyizme (02/01/2013) [-]
That **** still makes me laugh. His fault for being a ******** .
User avatar #71 - theshadowed (02/01/2013) [-]
Hooray for all the CHristians, Atheists and Agnostics who can't take jokes!

We seriously don't need your religious views in the comments.What you should be doing is:
Laugh
Thumb
(Optional) Comment something humourus
Move the **** on
#52 - anon (02/01/2013) [-]
could someone explain why it seems like all atheists have a giant stick shoved up their ass when it comes to religion?
User avatar #56 to #52 - BerwindTwentyFour (02/01/2013) [-]
We don't. It's the ones that talk that all of the attention is on.
User avatar #54 to #52 - emmyizme (02/01/2013) [-]
Seriously? Cause only Atheists are like that, right?
User avatar #78 to #54 - BerwindTwentyFour (02/01/2013) [-]
I think our anon OP here is trying to ignore the stick he just sat on when he asked that question.
#80 - anon (02/01/2013) [-]
Half the top comments here are about how Christians can take a joke, and the other half are about how atheists are dicks for making it. Lolwut?

There are jokes about a girl drinking bleach or Muslims being violent or Conservatives or Liberals being stupid, but when it comes to one quip about Christianity it suddenly becomes too much. This is even about a literal interpretation of the bible, which everyone says is stupid to believe, so why is anyone getting all uppity about it?
#62 - ThpiderMan (02/01/2013) [-]
Honestly, imo, anyone who's completely ardent and outspoken about their beliefs is a cunt, whether that's religion or atheism.  Don't blindly hate someone because a book tells you too, while the same book damns you all the same for getting a piercing or a tattoo.  Don't be a condescending dick to someone because they faith, because faith doesn't mean the absolute dismissal of science and logic, like many atheists believe, there are just some who need that spark to keep them going, to give them something to fight for when they have nothing else.  You never know someone else's story.   
   
Like the old adage goes, just because you're proud of it, don't shove it down other peoples throats, whether its your dick or your beliefs.
Honestly, imo, anyone who's completely ardent and outspoken about their beliefs is a cunt, whether that's religion or atheism. Don't blindly hate someone because a book tells you too, while the same book damns you all the same for getting a piercing or a tattoo. Don't be a condescending dick to someone because they faith, because faith doesn't mean the absolute dismissal of science and logic, like many atheists believe, there are just some who need that spark to keep them going, to give them something to fight for when they have nothing else. You never know someone else's story.

Like the old adage goes, just because you're proud of it, don't shove it down other peoples throats, whether its your dick or your beliefs.
User avatar #8 - ireallylikepotatoe (02/01/2013) [-]
>Implying the life of Jesus is the only thing in the bible
>Implying the bible is not supposed to make us better people
>Implying everything in the bible should be interpreted word for word (This makes the worst Christians and the worst Atheists)
User avatar #46 to #8 - ivoryhammer (02/01/2013) [-]
Stop saying implying, this isn't 4chan
User avatar #60 to #8 - BerwindTwentyFour (02/01/2013) [-]
If anything the bible should be used as a book of morals. not a book of facts.
A story doesn't have to be true for one follow it's moral.
That being said. Some Atheists read and follow some interpretations in the bible because they think it's morally correct, whether it has happened or not.
User avatar #21 to #8 - thatguywhohasbacon ONLINE (02/01/2013) [-]
>Implying gay bashing makes you a better person
>Implying being xenophobic about other religions makes you a good person
#19 to #8 - ravyen (02/01/2013) [-]
Oh, I didn't know the key to salvation would be in riddles. God wouldn't say "Ooooooh, that wasn't literal. Sorry, you go to hell."
User avatar #39 to #19 - Logicaltightrope (02/01/2013) [-]
Ever wonder why so much in the bible is in proverbs and stories? Like all the ones Jesus tells? It's not literal because it's meant to make people think learn themselves.
User avatar #42 to #39 - Logicaltightrope (02/01/2013) [-]
*Think AND learn
User avatar #44 to #42 - taintedangel (02/01/2013) [-]
You ever read a history textbook? Churches never wanted people learning.
#45 to #44 - Logicaltightrope (02/01/2013) [-]
You ever read a history textbook?  In the Middle Ages, the Church established colleges to advance knowledge and preserve it from Roman civilization.  Great progress was made in medicine, etc.  Also, monasteries kept ancient literature alive by saving and duplicating it.
You ever read a history textbook? In the Middle Ages, the Church established colleges to advance knowledge and preserve it from Roman civilization. Great progress was made in medicine, etc. Also, monasteries kept ancient literature alive by saving and duplicating it.
#23 to #8 - nicktheslayer (02/01/2013) [-]
>implying people come to funnyjunk to not expect jokes
#9 to #8 - improbablyyourdad ONLINE (02/01/2013) [-]
Using the bible as a moral guide...
User avatar #33 to #9 - goldenglimmer (02/01/2013) [-]
... you haven't actually read the Bible, have you?

You know, I can take the jokes, even horribly delivered jokes like the one in this content. Heck, I'll even laugh at some of them. If they're original and well thought out, why not? I want to establish the fact that it isn't the Atheist community voicing its opinions in the form of jokes (albeit terrible ones) that vexes me. It's the blatant ignorance in the comment section.

Listen, I'm an Agnostic-Catholic at best. Personally I feel like I'm still on a journey in my spiritual life, and I really try to keep my eyes open and stay objective to the truth, the absolute truth, which I believe in my heart exists. I don't buy the lies of modern culture; the seductive path of relativism and progressive thought. I believe in a moral universe in addition to the physical one, and that certain moral frameworks are more in sync with the moral universe than others. After scrutinizing and attempting to understand (admittedly at times ) some of the philosophies we've developed over the years, I've found that the morals and values of Christian thought is way superior to, well, basically everything else out there. I'd like to make it clear that I'm talking about traditional, Christian philosophy (specifically intellectual Catholicism).

So, considering this, I have to question the motivation behind your astonishingly pretentious statement. What is it that you find so repudiating in the Bible that makes you think that it isn't a decent moral framework to follow? Atheist or not, most respectable non-believers don't deny that it's high quality philosophy (in addition to the occasional superstitious passage about God's wrath, but that's all in the Old Testament). I don't understand your juvenile, yet cynical comment.

TL;DR: I'm guessing you didn't read this, which is okay. My point summed up is basically this: what makes you find the moral framework that the Bible provides to be unfitting?
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#48 to #33 - kanade **User deleted account** has deleted their comment [-]
User avatar #58 to #33 - phatsno (02/01/2013) [-]
I think that you deserve more than just simple thumbs for being the intelligent, honest, and non-apathetic person you are. I think that most atheists don't understand religion of any kind enough to even think about bashing it. And at the same time, a lot of religious people don't even understand their own faith; instead they give themselves a title and say they have faith, yet it's nothing more than simple words and in the end both atheists and religious folk look terribly stupid.
User avatar #35 to #33 - goldenglimmer (02/01/2013) [-]
It should be "(admittedly with futile attempts at times)" in the third paragraph.
My apologies.
User avatar #40 to #35 - stcronin (02/01/2013) [-]
It's okay it was well said
#41 to #33 - Logicaltightrope (02/01/2013) [-]
I'm a Christian, but I'm not gonna be pretentious and say I understand Christianity as much as I'd like to. In what I have found, however, is that most people - Christian or not - that get in on the Atheism v. Christianity debate are extremely uneducated about what sometimes is their own faith.

You, my friend, have said the wisest thing that I've heard all week.
User avatar #84 to #33 - improbablyyourdad ONLINE (02/01/2013) [-]
It was written by primitive people with barbaric morals. What was okay to do back then/ was advised, will now get you put in prison.
For instance..
www.skepticsannotatedbible.com/says_about/children.html

There is more but Iv been up for 19+ hours so I don't feel like holding your hand. Just look for yourself.

Since questions are being asked...
Hell, its clearly a man made concept, so why threaten kids/none believers with it if you know its ******** ?

Being gay isn't a choice and it IS natural so why would "god" create something that's automatically going to hell?

If we can point to a time line and say this is around the time when this religion was written, why in the hell would you believe it but disregard more modern religions as false?

Also how does it make you feel knowing the story of jesus parallels so many others before him?
User avatar #94 to #84 - goldenglimmer (02/02/2013) [-]
Good. Let's get started.

1. You didn't actually answer my initial question, have you read the Bible? Your reply, although uninsightful, was incredibly revealing. For starters, your animosity towards Christianity makes it so blatantly obvious that your intellectual participation in this discourse is not intellectual at all, but emotional. Your "source(s)" (which I have checked out, thoroughly mind you) are nothing but unoriginal circle jerks, using verses taken out of context and displaying old superstitions from Genesis and Deuteronomy as unequivocal evidence of the "intellectual shackles imposed on us by religion". It is clear to me, and to everyone here, irrelevant of what side they represent, that you are factually and philosophically biased.

2. Really? The documents, these incredibly coherent and historically traceable documents, are obviously man made? See, this is what gets me about Atheists. The utter arrogance of many of you is so infuriating I nearly lose my composure. The fact that you can assert yourself intellectually and morally superior based on the notion that you and your ilk are somehow enlightened in your nihilism is perplexing, and to be frank, quite irritating. Stop it.
As you so astutely point out, it was written by "primitive people with barbaric morals". Okay, I'm game, let's run with that.
These barbaric farmers and shepherds with no education; no understanding of history or philosophy or any academic experience, are out of the blue inspired to come together and write one of the most profound stories in the history of mankind. A story that has endured for two thousand years; a story that has nearly a third of the entire world's population convinced must be true. They come together, and write a story that absolutely does not match the philosophy of the time, or the norms, or the culture. One that sticks out like a sore thumb.
User avatar #95 to #94 - goldenglimmer (02/02/2013) [-]
cont.

If you actually read the New Testament, you would see for yourself what its sentiments are; what the message is. But here it is, all wrapped up in an easy to understand sentence for you: it's a message of love. This is truly what separates the New Testament from other philosophies. It is so clear that Jesus had no agenda of power, or money, or fame. No, he truly believed he was the Son of God, and he selflessly endured a fate we cannot even begin to comprehend. These farmers tell a story of a God who lived and died for the salvation of man; they tell a story of a deep agape love, one which we can't possibly fathom. These philosophical concepts are deep when reflected upon on their own, but when one considers where they stem from, well, that's some weird **** .
This is what I've always said about the Bible and the nature of the Bible: I don't know if I believe it, but it truly is some weird **** .
So no, don't come here and say that it's obviously man made, because the only thing you accomplish is coming across as an arrogant prick. I'm not saying it isn't man made, but if it is, it certainly isn't obvious.

3. Thank you for bringing up a grossly reused subject, namely homosexuality. All I will say is this: the New Testament is the new pact, and nowhere in the NT does it state unequivocally that being gay is a sin. There. Happy? Probably not, that's one less banality you can arm yourself with in a debate with an informed person (although somehow I doubt this new data will make you think twice about it in the future).

4. This is a separate discussion. If you would genuinely like to know why I find Christianity superior to other philosophies, and it wasn't just a pointless rhetorical question, then feel free to ask.

5. I feel nothing, because that's a pathetic attempt at a cheap shot (and it's wrong). I'll answer that with a question: How does it feel that basically all the values presented within humanism are basically just recycled Christian values?
User avatar #96 to #95 - improbablyyourdad ONLINE (02/02/2013) [-]
I skimmed and went to bible camp for a few years. I am not saying the bible doesn't have good stories or beautiful poetry. It just shouldn't be seen as literal or used as a moral compass, well maybe now it should since they can just remove or edit all of the atrocities and contradictions that were in previous versions.

The fact that the bible is subject to change shows its not perfect. If it was "the word of god" don't you think it should be infallible?

"These barbaric farmers and shepherds with no education; no understanding of history or philosophy or any academic experience, are out of the blue inspired to come together and write one of the most profound stories in the history of mankind. A story that has endured for two thousand years; a story that has nearly a third of the entire world's population convinced must be true. They come together, and write a story that absolutely does not match the philosophy of the time, or the norms, or the culture. One that sticks out like a sore thumb."
Oh boy... First of all how do you know that? Second, the reason why Christianity is so popular is because they lumped a bunch of variations together. You have probably heard this a lot but if you were born in India you would think Hinduism or Islam is the "sore thumb". So why is Christianity the true and others are not?

3. This is apart of the whole being subject to change bit, which is laughable.

4. Yes, I would like to know because I don't see you having a good reason to.

5. It's not a cheap shot, I was being genuine. This is what killed it for me and I wanted to know if this affected you like it did me.

As for the stories (people) that closely resemble Jesus but came before..
Romulus
Buddha
Dionysus
Horus
Krishna
Heracles
Glycon
Odysseus
Zoroaster
Attis of phyrgia
User avatar #47 to #9 - ivoryhammer (02/01/2013) [-]
It's fine as a moral guide, it's when people take it literally is the problem, they're just stories, just like Aesop's tales, they didn't happen, but they have a lesson.
#22 to #8 - archiferd (02/01/2013) [-]
It's just a joke man.
It's just a joke man.
#10 to #8 - anon (02/01/2013) [-]
makes us better people
tells us to sell daughter into slavery
#25 to #8 - anon (02/01/2013) [-]
God dammit, Christians like you are the reason why people think we don't have a sense of humour.
#11 to #8 - opjoopie (02/01/2013) [-]
That one simple joke is implying all that? Wow.. I thought it was just.. one simple joke..
That one simple joke is implying all that? Wow.. I thought it was just.. one simple joke..
#12 to #8 - duskmane ONLINE (02/01/2013) [-]
>Implying you're the leading authority on the bible.
>Implying you're the leading authority on the bible.
User avatar #16 to #12 - sonsofsol (02/01/2013) [-]
THERE IS NO GREENTEXT HERE!
User avatar #20 to #16 - duskmane ONLINE (02/01/2013) [-]
It's not whether the text is green or not.. but the idea of the thing.
User avatar #27 - xsap (02/01/2013) [-]
that has got to be the lamest excuse for why she got pregnant ever "oh god did it"... we all know she ****** her neighbor Muhammad
User avatar #66 - phatsno (02/01/2013) [-]
Why atheists and the religious cannot understand one another:

Being a religious person but having a very strong agnostic character allows one to understand the relative existence of the spiritual world on earth according to religion. Yet, they should not be so stupid as to think that human reasoning will allow one to understand the spiritual world; rather spiritual guidance is needed to understand all that is spiritual. In other words, how can any human who does not seek spiritual guidance ever hope to understand what is spiritual? How can the man who claims there is no God and no spiritual life after death and judgement from the Almighty claim to understand enough of this spiritual world in order to secede themselves from that level and claim to be higher or smarter than the average religious man or woman.

That is human reasoning. And spiritual understanding cannot come with a closed mind.
#87 to #66 - anon (02/01/2013) [-]
The reason isn't that one side understands spirtual 'guidance' while the other doesn't. It's because we are human. Our brains hate anything we don't don't agree with.

Look at it like teenagers who have different music tastes. One will bitch at the other for liking rock music, saying classical is the **** ; while the other bitches back. Not all of them are going to bitch at each other over it, just a lot do. It doesn't mean they don't understand what the other music is. It just means they don't like it/agree with it.

An Athiest could understand a Christian's reason for believing in a god and still find it stupid, and vice versa.
#24 - anon (02/01/2013) [-]
I wonder if I were to have a children, particularly twins, one would be christ and the other the anti-christ.
#1 - anon (02/01/2013) [-]
Check for loss of Virginity if the hymen is intact..... well **** .
User avatar #5 to #1 - zerokiller (02/01/2013) [-]
Girls masturbate too.
User avatar #15 to #5 - sarphog (02/01/2013) [-]
I don't think you know how female masturbation is at that age..
#14 to #1 - anon (02/01/2013) [-]
My girlfriend's hymen didn't break until the third time we had sex.. Just saying.
User avatar #63 to #1 - BerwindTwentyFour (02/01/2013) [-]
I think the Hymen would break during birth in this case..
#30 to #1 - kingnicholas (02/01/2013) [-]
I seem to recal that in the bible it says they did check although i could be wrong
#4 to #1 - anon (02/01/2013) [-]
Many women are born without a hymen / break it during gymnastics or some **** .
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#38 - peanutrexsaurus has deleted their comment [-]
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#26 - xsap has deleted their comment [-]
User avatar #6 - garvielxloken (02/01/2013) [-]
Well, I'd have no choice but to beat my daughter for heresy! (I would just like to clarify that I am joking)
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