It's funny because title. I once ate a monkey fart while riding a dolphin into space dressed in assless chaps holding a whip. Related.. I haven't fucked a dolphin yet because I can't swim at 20 knots underwater.
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It's funny because title

I once ate a monkey fart while riding a dolphin into space dressed in assless chaps holding a whip. Related

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Views: 20445
Favorited: 60
Submitted: 01/27/2013
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#1 - croc ONLINE (01/27/2013) [+] (4 replies)
I haven't fucked a dolphin yet because I can't swim at 20 knots underwater.
User avatar #8 - Jackimole (01/27/2013) [-]
I switched over a year and 3 months ago, and I haven't looked back. Fucking dolphins has changed my life.
User avatar #15 - defeats (01/27/2013) [-]
I'd rather not.

You'll be out there in the ocean, fucking a female dolphin and something horrible will happen.
A male dolphin will somehow find out, maybe through sound, smell, or just tingling dolphin senses. He knows what you're doing and knows what you want. He doesn't have a vagina but what he does have are a particular set of skills, skills he's acquired though serious rape tenancies, skills that make him a nightmare for any living creature with a hole, people like you.
If you leave the ocean now and stop fucking that female dolphin he will not look for you, he will not pursue you. But if you don't, the male dolphin will find you, and he will rape you.

Male dolphins even rape each other.
#35 - cball (01/28/2013) [-]
I never thought i would ever have to see a dolphin vagina. Thanks for proving me wrong again internet.
I never thought i would ever have to see a dolphin vagina. Thanks for proving me wrong again internet.
#13 - seymourtets ONLINE (01/27/2013) [-]
#26 - duathdaert (01/28/2013) [+] (4 replies)
So I think I'm going to go bang a dolphin.
So I think I'm going to go bang a dolphin.
#47 - werrew (01/28/2013) [-]
Dolphins cant make sandwiches
#19 - selfdenyingbeggar (01/28/2013) [+] (1 reply)
"A male dolphin's member is roughly S-shaped, tapered at the end. If you are in the water with them, it is best to support the dolphin on his side, just under the water, with one hand, and handle him with the other. Male dolphins, I find, tend to prefer the base of the penis to be gently massaged and squeezed, as well as gently rubbed along it's length.

Due to the size of a dolphin's member, the best you can do with a male dolphin is to masturbate him. Missionary position or anal sex are both out of the question. Also, be careful : when those things shoot, they shoot. Remember what your mom told you about trains and get out of the way.

The female dolphin can be either masturbated or fucked, depending on your gender. Roll the dolphin gently to her side, belly towards you, and prop yourself on an elbow to stay face-to-face with her."
User avatar #24 - imamawesome (01/28/2013) [-]
I haven't even fucked a woman yet, and dolphins seem way more superior than woman how am I gonna compare myself to them, their out of my league
#21 - benotter (01/28/2013) [+] (5 replies)
http://www.insolitology.com/guides/fuckdolphin.htm   
For Any questions you may have, this is apparently a real thing, that actual people do.   
Dolphin Fucking,   
Its whats for Desert.
http://www.insolitology.com/guides/fuckdolphin.htm
For Any questions you may have, this is apparently a real thing, that actual people do.
Dolphin Fucking,
Its whats for Desert.
User avatar #16 - Mward (01/27/2013) [-]
Didn't some guy get the skin ripped off of his dick for trying this once? I mean it's a huge animal that's one big muscle, I don't know if i'd want them squeezing my dick with all their might.
User avatar #3 - evilanakie ONLINE (01/27/2013) [-]
there muscles will rip your dick off
OFF
#36 - whateveridontneed (01/28/2013) [-]
BECAUSE WHERE ARE THE TITTIES?
#25 - anonymous (01/28/2013) [-]
There was definitely a follow up post to this one, from a guy who worked at like a marine amusement park, who'd enjoyed fucking a dolphin for about ten seconds till it circumcised him. Don't be drawn in, 4chan doesn't want you to be happy, it wants lulz.
+6
#22 - verinenhimo **User deleted account** has deleted their comment [-]
#45 - aurelianopeachdoor (01/28/2013) [+] (1 reply)
I once read a post about a guy who told us how he followed /b/ advice and fucked a dolphin, only to end up getting the head of his dick ripped to pieces.

So no, I won't fuck a dolphin.

MFW reading that guy's story.
User avatar #50 to #45 - jallious (01/28/2013) [-]
I once read a post that was complete bullshit so that that person could get thumbs.

Oh wait, that was just now.
#17 - tigasingy (01/28/2013) [-]
Semi-Related
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