Check. The next time anyone says, "Where do you get your morals from!?!?!".. I'd kill you for a klondike bar. Morals morality Religion kill murder
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#19 - semisane
Reply +138
(01/24/2013) [-]
I'd kill you for a klondike bar.
#243 to #19 - superanonymouspers
Reply +1
(01/25/2013) [-]
But you can't blame anyone for that. it's a klondike bar... what WOULDN'T you do for a klondike bar?
#20 to #19 - SenatorSnowe [OP]
Reply +28
(01/24/2013) [-]
#1 - etoilation
Reply +49
(01/24/2013) [-]
How is this funny?
How is this funny?
#112 to #1 - anbieter
Reply 0
(01/24/2013) [-]
It's funny because alcohol and other drugs.
#26 to #1 - YllekNayr
Reply +3
(01/24/2013) [-]
The same way that the morbid and feel posts are funny.
#2 to #1 - SenatorSnowe [OP]
Reply +113
(01/24/2013) [-]
It's not.
#3 to #2 - etoilation
Reply +2
(01/24/2013) [-]
So why post it on a website called funnyjunk? I am sure you can easily find an atheist chat group or some ****
#4 to #3 - SenatorSnowe [OP]
Reply +11
(01/24/2013) [-]
I posted it on the Atheism channel. There's that, a religion channel, ***************, etc,. Despite the name, this place isn't limited to material perceived as 'funny.'   
On a lighter note, I've been looking for that give you first posted for quite a while.   
So thank you.   
Gif unrelated.
I posted it on the Atheism channel. There's that, a religion channel, ***************, etc,. Despite the name, this place isn't limited to material perceived as 'funny.'
On a lighter note, I've been looking for that give you first posted for quite a while.
So thank you.
Gif unrelated.
#6 to #4 - etoilation
Reply +1
(01/24/2013) [-]
You are welcome for the gif. And I have no problem with you promoting atheism, or someone promoting Christianity, or anything like that. As long as it is funny, or there is some type of joke in it.
#5 to #3 - anon
Reply 0
(01/24/2013) [-]
This.

0/10 would not bang.
#368 to #3 - kokanium **User deleted account**
-1
has deleted their comment [-]
#14 to #3 - blakedcampbell
Reply -1
(01/24/2013) [-]
atheist chatrooms don't exist bcuz atheists just like to talk about atheism with people who have a religion
#27 - Jackimole
Reply +52
(01/24/2013) [-]
"I wouldn't follow a God who told me to kill another human being. Luckily this doesn't conflict with my current beliefs, as God is a benevolent force with a capacity for forgiveness."

I'm not even religious, but that's a ******* easy question to answer.
#47 to #27 - jallious
Reply 0
(01/24/2013) [-]
Then why did he kill so many people, according to the bible, instead of just forgiving them?
#174 to #47 - gatoradefucker **User deleted account**
+3
has deleted their comment [-]
#224 to #174 - rikeus
Reply -2
(01/25/2013) [-]
isn't he an unchanging god? OOOOOOOOH
#54 to #27 - anon
Reply 0
(01/24/2013) [-]
Didn't the abrahamian god order abraham(?) to kill his son?
And he didn't know the god was going to say "loljk"?

Not such an easy answer for quite a few people now.
#163 to #27 - wiljones
Reply 0
(01/25/2013) [-]
tell that to all those Egyptian children he killed
#323 to #27 - MCmc
Reply 0
(01/25/2013) [-]
but your decision to not follow a god who told you to kill another human being demonstrates that you have morals outside of religion, which is the point of his post. and yes there are people who argue the point
#89 - visualmind
Reply +47
(01/24/2013) [-]
Im an atheist

but if a giant face came down from the sky, I would do anything it told me
#102 to #89 - telmarine
Reply +6
(01/24/2013) [-]
KILL PEOPLE
#106 to #89 - SenatorSnowe [OP]
Reply +7
(01/24/2013) [-]
Sodomize a puppy.
#135 to #89 - alexusapi
Reply +8
(01/25/2013) [-]
Tickle my anus
#110 to #89 - telmarine
Reply +9
(01/24/2013) [-]
GIVE ME 20 DOLLARS
#62 - jimimij
Reply +33
(01/24/2013) [-]
Hypotheticals are fun. Would you set your dick on fire if it caused world peace?
Hypotheticals are fun. Would you set your dick on fire if it caused world peace?
#70 to #62 - torchrose
Reply 0
(01/24/2013) [-]
not like my dick was going to please anyone anyways
#130 to #62 - leredspy
Reply 0
(01/25/2013) [-]
Yes, at least then everyone would agree that my dick is hot.
#320 to #62 - arstya
Reply 0
(01/25/2013) [-]
Yes.
#115 to #62 - alexusapi
Reply +3
(01/25/2013) [-]
yes i would, you never said for how long or how much fire. hit me with your best shot
#116 to #115 - jimimij
Reply +1
(01/25/2013) [-]
Would you clean a dirty subway toilet with your tongue if it meant you could have the superpower of your choice?
#120 to #116 - alexusapi
Reply +3
(01/25/2013) [-]
yes, have the superpower of being able to grant myself wishes, then wish myself healthy and wish to forget that i licked a toilet :)
yes, have the superpower of being able to grant myself wishes, then wish myself healthy and wish to forget that i licked a toilet :)
#121 to #120 - jimimij
Reply +1
(01/25/2013) [-]
But you'd still have to do it. haha
#125 to #121 - alexusapi
Reply +2
(01/25/2013) [-]
who cares if i forget it :) how can you prove your life is actually real? maybe everything around you was generated, even your memories. and you just woke up this morning but it feels like you've lived your whole life.
who cares if i forget it :) how can you prove your life is actually real? maybe everything around you was generated, even your memories. and you just woke up this morning but it feels like you've lived your whole life.
#126 to #125 - drekinn ONLINE
Reply +2
(01/25/2013) [-]
that blew my mind dude!
#127 to #125 - jimimij
Reply +1
(01/25/2013) [-]
The universe is simply a figment of its own deranged imanigation
The universe is simply a figment of its own deranged imanigation
#182 to #125 - undeadwill
Reply 0
(01/25/2013) [-]
This image has expired
Would you like to pm and have an semi intelligent conversations?
#184 to #182 - alexusapi
Reply 0
(01/25/2013) [-]
Sure, always interested in talking philosophical.
#358 to #184 - undeadwill
Reply 0
(01/25/2013) [-]
Well, I'm an informed voter and talented poet.
#363 to #358 - alexusapi
Reply 0
(01/25/2013) [-]
i added you as a friend
#132 to #125 - jimimij
Reply 0
(01/25/2013) [-]
Thank you for this.
you set me free.
I'm gonna head to 4chan and see if anyone wants to watch me kill myself.
#40 - gildemoono
Reply +22
(01/24/2013) [-]
Thats a loaded question and inherently illogical. This question assumes that God would demand such a thing regardless of the past actions, sins, of the murder victim in question. It also contradicts itself by first making it assumed that God did exist in the context of the question but then berates the mental soundness of the person that listens to His voice, as if he were insane and hearing something no one else can.

Im not trying to defend christianity (although I am one) because i know that causes ********** on this site. but im just saying, its a bad question.
#61 to #40 - therebemoose
Reply -1
(01/24/2013) [-]
Genesis 22:1-2
#79 to #61 - therebemoose
Reply -2
(01/24/2013) [-]
Furthermore, there is no contradiction, at least not until you injected it. There are two outcomes, which are clearly outlined in the OC. What you speak of insofar as the "contradiction" is simply your moral compass pointing you in the opposite direction of the "moral compass" that is God. You twisted it in an effort to keep your faith, plain and simple.
#42 to #40 - anon
Reply 0
(01/24/2013) [-]
Assume that God being the omniscient being that He apparently is knows something that you can't. The person He's ordering you to kill committed some grievous crime that only He knows about and that you have no way of knowing.
Are you willing to kill someone based solely on knowledge which you can't have?

It's not questioning God's reality or the deist's sanity, it's questioning whether the deist is willing to defer to such extreme judgement.
#192 to #42 - dadukesta
Reply +1
(01/25/2013) [-]
Or this could all be a God dammed test to see if you're a real Christian. God is facing you at heaven and tells you you can't get in unless you kill someone you don't know. If you agree, you go to hell for a while, if you don't you get into heaven.
#21 - zakvanloocke
Reply +12
(01/24/2013) [-]
Who needs God for a reason to kill?  Some people just piss me off.
Who needs God for a reason to kill? Some people just piss me off.
#25 to #21 - arandomanon ONLINE
Reply 0
(01/24/2013) [-]
Shielding behind an excuse.
#230 - cyberdemon
Reply +11
(01/25/2013) [-]
Comment Picture
#97 - recoveryone
Reply +11
(01/24/2013) [-]
Insanity: doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results.

~Albert Einstein

Someone is trying to convince religious people that their is no God(or Gods, or god, or gods, depending on which religion), to no avail, and yet keeps on trying. You see my fellow non-religious friend, anyone can use a quote, a definition, etc, to make another side/another belief look ******* retarded.
And anyone can use loopholes in what ever belief that make it look retarded, you're no different then a fundie asking you "What started the big bang, something had to, it can't just happen, Stephen Hawking even said so himself at one point(which, you may not know that he recently changed this idea, so you would possibly have no comeback in the least)". Or of course, you not be a edgy little douche about other peoples personal ideas, because everyone should keep these ideas to themselves because of the pointless ********** they turn up.
#104 to #97 - chasskika
Reply 0
(01/24/2013) [-]
While I appreciate your comment, and like what you had to say, I hate that Einstein quote. Something almost always changes, people usually overlook one major variable: Time. If you continue to do something over and over again, time will always change, and time usually changes things.

Once again, not trying to annoy you, just hate that quote.
#105 to #104 - recoveryone
Reply 0
(01/24/2013) [-]
Personally, I hate it too, I was just trying to prove a point.
#124 to #105 - anon
Reply 0
(01/25/2013) [-]
Using a quote you personally don't believe is true to prove a point.... Huh.
#133 to #124 - recoveryone
0
has deleted their comment [-]
#122 to #97 - ponchosdm
Reply 0
(01/25/2013) [-]
...
there have been infinite numbers of bigbangs
not energy nor mass cant be destroyed
universe is expanding and when it reaches it maximum size(it is infinite and it can have a maximum size, amazing), it start to contracts, when there is not possible to contract anymore(energy and mass trying to escape from itself), a bigbang happens, i really wonder if hawking couldnt think about that
#150 to #97 - firstgen
Reply +1
(01/25/2013) [-]
shamelessly: it is fun and gives me a sense of superiority. Debating like this to theist is fun for people like me, no i am not trying to make them rage but to engage with some one in a debate alone is fun but one so a) huge b) close to peoples hearts? thumb me down if you want but thats why i do it
#453 to #150 - recoveryone
Reply +1
(01/25/2013) [-]
I like to do the same, but only on the internet. But the way I do things is go into a thread with Athiests/Thiests, Republicans/Liberals, etc, and tell them why they are both wrong. Then it gets interesting.
#39 - mattdoggy
Reply +11
(01/24/2013) [-]
God wouldn't ask you to do such a thing
it isn't in his nature
if he did ask that He wouldn't be Him
>but what about all the "go kill him" in the bible
that deals with the old testament in the old covenant
in the new testament Jesus sacrifices himself to redeem humanity
in doing so he pushes for a servants heart and a passive hand even unto death

I know you want to feel like you are bettering the world by taking Christians down notch but a post here won't hurt Christians any and won't help Atheists really. All you are affecting is FunnyJunk by starting a rage fest with a question that any educated Christian or Atheist wouldn't even consider arguing over because it's so irrelevant. Enjoy this picture though as a sign of peace between us all
#60 to #39 - cullenatorguy
Reply +4
(01/24/2013) [-]
Matthew 10:34-10:39

Jesus was a good guy. There are numerous verses in the new testament that involve violence and death being the will of god. You can look it up. I won't argue with you, but don't say the new testament is all fine and dandy and perfectly peaceful.
Also, because this is a fun little thing to say...
Matthew 5:22
then
Matthew 23:17

Okay, I'm done. Sorry.