Gandalfs flowchart. Ehem. I It I GANDALF PROBLEM SOLVING we gun is ' in ddanger? amd!. was YES; Cain 5:: -mutant! arse. ded with it? law What want Hobbits? YES  gandalf flowchart eagles magic lordoftherings lord of the rings LOTR
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Gandalfs flowchart

I It I
GANDALF PROBLEM SOLVING
we gun
is ' in ddanger?
amd!. was
YES;
Cain 5:: -mutant!
arse. ded with it?
law
What want
Hobbits?
YES
Are swords of
use here?
work
Call the sagas!
Proceed to ind an -r Premium solved?
suitable Flo bit!
NO YES
T Are gnu dead? j} Resurrect
Grand!
...
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Views: 63436
Favorited: 242
Submitted: 01/11/2013
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Comments(142):

[ 142 comments ]
What do you think? Give us your opinion. Anonymous comments allowed.
User avatar #19 - Gandalfthewhite (01/12/2013) [-]
you know the eagles charge hourly, i'm not made of money
#117 to #19 - Fedexx (01/12/2013) [-]
Share the load.
Share the load.
#20 to #19 - onichild (01/12/2013) [-]
I lol'd hard 10/10
#17 - serotonin (01/12/2013) [-]
Comment Picture
#102 - wyldek (01/12/2013) [-]
FLOWCHARTS!!
User avatar #4 - billybobjoeii (01/11/2013) [-]
Since the previous two comments did not do a suitable job, allow me to clarify:

Gandalf does not have Eagle summoning powers. The eagles saw a fight was going on and wanted a part in it. They then proceed to take Gandalf and gang to the Eagle's nest, where Gandalf then talks to the Eagle king to see where he will drop them off.

It is here we see another thing many people commonly think:

The King Eagle tells Gandalf that they will not take the party any further than where they end up dropping them off because it is too dangerous for them to proceed any further (hence why they don't fly Frodo over Mount Doom).

As for picking Frodo up from Mount Doom (and their fight with the Nazgul in the final battle in Return of the King), they were ordered there by their Master, the (at that time) greatest of the Valar, Manwe.
User avatar #5 to #4 - padrerebelscumole (01/11/2013) [-]
Isn't the brown wizard the summoner of the eagles?
User avatar #6 to #5 - billybobjoeii (01/11/2013) [-]
No. No one "summons" the eagles.
User avatar #7 to #6 - padrerebelscumole (01/11/2013) [-]
When Gandalf is kept prisoner on Sarumans Castle roof the eagle was sent by the brown wizard.
User avatar #8 to #7 - billybobjoeii (01/11/2013) [-]
No, Gandalf captures and sends a moth to go and ask the Eagles to come rescue him. An eagle named Gwaihir ends up doing so.

It might also be fair to note Gwaihir also took Gandalf's body from Zirak-Zigil (the place where he fought and killed the Balrog).
User avatar #15 to #8 - padrerebelscumole (01/12/2013) [-]
It appears to be a You need to login to view this link to the moth doesn't exist to the books.
lotr.wikia.com/wiki/The_Moth under controversy
User avatar #123 to #15 - billybobjoeii (01/12/2013) [-]
Huh. Must not remember that portion.... UGHAKLJ:AFKLMK

READING TIME!
User avatar #10 to #8 - blarglestheclown (01/12/2013) [-]
you know your lore sir.
User avatar #11 to #10 - billybobjoeii (01/12/2013) [-]
Haha, I love Tolkien.
#9 to #7 - anon (01/11/2013) [-]
Think you are right seeing how Gandalf was "speaking" to a moth before the eagles arrived.
User avatar #12 to #9 - billybobjoeii (01/12/2013) [-]
Tolkien's world is not ours, some animals speak in that world (though not any tongue commonly known), and he is a wizard, after all. So him speaking to a moth isn't too far fetched.
#18 to #12 - applescryatnight (01/12/2013) [-]
gandalf has wizard ears too
User avatar #13 to #6 - satrenkotheone ONLINE (01/12/2013) [-]
But I wanted to be summoner of the eagles...
User avatar #14 to #4 - kensislayer ONLINE (01/12/2013) [-]
I thought the king of he eagles owed gandalf because he saved their king from a poisoned arrow
User avatar #24 to #4 - turboderp (01/12/2013) [-]
eh.. didn't he talk to some butterflies, and they went and called for the eagles? I might be wrong, that's just how I got it..
User avatar #26 to #24 - Nullifier (01/12/2013) [-]
Thats some BS they invented in the movies, there are no butterflies..
User avatar #121 to #26 - billybobjoeii (01/12/2013) [-]
Actually there were, with one minor correction; it was a moth.
User avatar #144 to #121 - Nullifier (01/12/2013) [-]
They were used more by Radagast, though, who doesn't even appear in the movies as communicating with Gwaihir.
User avatar #27 to #26 - turboderp (01/12/2013) [-]
Oh.. Well, I have only watch'd the movies so I guess I don't kno **** :s

Started reading the hobbit in christmas, but then school started and haven't have too much time reading.. Probably will do in next vacation ^^ Easter probably! :D

(I do thehobbit, then the three LOTR books if I have time)
User avatar #31 to #27 - Nullifier (01/12/2013) [-]
They're tough reads, speaking as an avid reader myself. The vocabulary is "challenging" but mostly it's just that Tolkien goes onnnnnnnn and oooooooonnnnnnnnnnnnnn about certain things
User avatar #34 to #4 - shazmothree (01/12/2013) [-]
Valar? I'm guessing this is information from the books written by Tolkein's son
#40 to #34 - diroccodoodleedoo (01/12/2013) [-]
No, the Valar are from the Sillmarillion, the book Tolkien wrote concerning the entire history of the world of the Lord of the Rings (AKA Arda) up until the fall of Numenor (basically LOTR Atlantis). The Valar are basically the 'gods' of the world, although they are only servants of the one god, Eru Illuvatar. Characters like Gandalf, Saruman, and even Sauron and Balrogs are actually angelic beings called Maiar, which are basically subordinate Valar (read: angels). Sauron, Balrogs, and most other evil Maiar were corrupted by the rouge Valar, Morgoth, (aka Melko, Melkoth, Bauglir) who is basically the devil.    
   
If you are interested, I highly recommend reading the Sillmarillion, but caveat emptor, 			******		 denser than week old fruitcake and is basically a History textbook with only a few actual narratives in it. Although, there are a couple of great stories in it, such as the Tale of Beren and Luthien.
No, the Valar are from the Sillmarillion, the book Tolkien wrote concerning the entire history of the world of the Lord of the Rings (AKA Arda) up until the fall of Numenor (basically LOTR Atlantis). The Valar are basically the 'gods' of the world, although they are only servants of the one god, Eru Illuvatar. Characters like Gandalf, Saruman, and even Sauron and Balrogs are actually angelic beings called Maiar, which are basically subordinate Valar (read: angels). Sauron, Balrogs, and most other evil Maiar were corrupted by the rouge Valar, Morgoth, (aka Melko, Melkoth, Bauglir) who is basically the devil.

If you are interested, I highly recommend reading the Sillmarillion, but caveat emptor, ****** denser than week old fruitcake and is basically a History textbook with only a few actual narratives in it. Although, there are a couple of great stories in it, such as the Tale of Beren and Luthien.
User avatar #36 to #34 - lorddrake (01/12/2013) [-]
It's actually more of a bundle of all the small stories and mythology that Tolkien wrote over the years. His son finished the work by linking then one to another and filling the gaps. The book resulting is called the Silmarillion.

(could be wrong here)
User avatar #120 to #36 - billybobjoeii (01/12/2013) [-]
No, the Silmarillion was the first book started, and the book near completion when Tolkien died. He intended it to be the complete tale, and 95% of the book was written by him, and the other 5% was organized and completed using Tolkiens notes (sometimes he had 3 or 4 possible scenarios over the same story).

And it really isn't a history, it's just the story of the Silmarils, and the events thereafter, hence Quenta Silmarillion (the main portion of the book). The rest is just background and foreground info.
User avatar #37 to #36 - shazmothree (01/12/2013) [-]
So lets say I want to read what took place before the Hobbit in chronological order, what would I read first?
User avatar #39 to #37 - lorddrake (01/12/2013) [-]
You should read that book.
The Hobbit and The lord of the Rings are telling the story of the 3rd age.
The Silmarillion is telling the story of the 1st and 2nd ages. So yea, it's kind of the beginning. If you really like the Tolkien universe, read it.

I warn you tho, the writing is pretty different from The Hobbit or LOTR, more complex, more mythological.
And the last quarter of the book is almost un-readable, mostly talking about how this guy is the son of this guy and who gave birth to what line of warriors that lived under this one magic city, etc...
#45 to #4 - wudup (01/12/2013) [-]
Granted, Gandalf CAN call on the eagles when he needs help, as he saved their leader from poison a long time ago and they are thus willing to aid him when he needs it.
User avatar #122 to #45 - billybobjoeii (01/12/2013) [-]
If I can recall correctly, the eagles that appear in the hobbit had no previous correlation with Gandalf other than the "King Eagle" being the son of Thorondor, the first King of the Eagles.
#80 - shazmothree (01/12/2013) [-]
Comment Picture
#99 - marchinghurdler (01/12/2013) [-]
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#93 - snakefire (01/12/2013) [-]
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User avatar #100 to #93 - subaqueousreach (01/12/2013) [-]
I just watched this for a good four minutes... I have never felt such simplistic joy...
+9
#105 to #93 - nigglymcniggerton **User deleted account** has deleted their comment [-]
User avatar #106 to #105 - snakefire (01/12/2013) [-]
at first I thought this was just gibberish but then I got it....
User avatar #118 - carnivorouswalnut (01/12/2013) [-]
There could be an infinite loop if Gandalf solves a problem but dies everytime he checks.
(Problem solved?>YES>Are you dead?>YES>Resurrect>>Problem Solved?>YES>Are you dead?>YES>Resurrect>*initiate loop*)
User avatar #124 to #118 - krasnogvardiech (01/12/2013) [-]
No it won't, he'll solve the problem sooner or later.
Someday, he's going to get real sick of the problem's **** .
#87 - jiltist ONLINE (01/12/2013) [-]
If Middle Earth is in danger and Gandalf just wants to end it all, he can't (according to this chart).
User avatar #96 to #87 - hydraetis (01/12/2013) [-]
Actually, Yes-No-No-Yes-Yes-No doesn't include assistance from anyone else.
#97 - checkemtrain (01/12/2013) [-]
This image has expired
#85 - anon (01/12/2013) [-]
>be me
>go out tonight to watch The Hobbit for the first time with little brother
>thoroughly enjoy it
>answer every little question nine year old brother is asking
>he asks why Gandalf comes and goes as he pleases
>have no real answer
>come home
>get on funnyjunk
>could have used this
#119 - ChanChan (01/12/2013) [-]
**ChanChan rolls 51**
User avatar #126 to #119 - TheFixer (01/12/2013) [-]
**TheFixer rolls 079,058,465** not today
-2
#129 to #119 - mysterykid has deleted their comment [-]
-2
#130 to #129 - mysterykid has deleted their comment [-]
User avatar #133 to #119 - niklamacz (01/12/2013) [-]
**niklamacz rolls 38** not dubs
0
#134 to #119 - skullor has deleted their comment [-]
#98 - dafuqman (01/12/2013) [-]
Comment Picture
#139 - saybia (01/12/2013) [-]
What do you mean?

Do you mean to say, that this is Gandalfs own flowchart?
Or that this is a flowchart made for myself, gandalf?;
Do you mean that this flowchart would be good for Gandalf?
Or simply - That OP is a major faggot?
User avatar #140 to #139 - whitcher (01/12/2013) [-]
All of them?
#21 - cameronrox (01/12/2013) [-]
awww yeaaah gandalf, the smoker of ounces, the packer of pipeweed!
awww yeaaah gandalf, the smoker of ounces, the packer of pipeweed!
#22 to #21 - pineapplepeople ONLINE (01/12/2013) [-]
Really? Of all the badassery Gandalf and furthermore Ian McKellen is composed of, you chose to idolize his ability to inhale a burning plant? Really?
User avatar #29 to #22 - cameronrox (01/12/2013) [-]
ITS A GIF YOU TWAT! thats not idolization, its a ******* ship going through a hoop. And no im not going to remind you of all the much more badass **** he did, i know, you know, and so does everyone else
#30 to #29 - pineapplepeople ONLINE (01/12/2013) [-]
Yes it is a gif. And both your alternative titles for the grey wizard were marijuana related. You literally could have used anything he ever did, but you chose marijuana, which (though I may very well be wrong) was never specified as the plant in the pipe.
#38 to #30 - cameronrox (01/12/2013) [-]
He chopped off some goblins head.

omg su moch betur.

they call it pipeweed in the movie, refer to The fellowship extended edition scene 5. and LORD HELP ME IF IM WRONG BUT PERHAPS THEY USE THE ******* METRIC SYSTEM!
#42 to #38 - pineapplepeople ONLINE (01/12/2013) [-]
I concede the point on the 'pipeweed', for as I mentioned before I wasn't sure. Second, how many people do you know that have decapitated a goblin? Third, I'd prefer you keep your sarcastic misuse of grammar to yourself.
User avatar #47 to #42 - cameronrox (01/12/2013) [-]
y dun u leik me tlak dis wai? pinaplepepul pls! pinaplepepul! stahp!! Ive read my fair share of books involving the decapitation of goblins... Rook Barkwater from the edge chronicles for one. And i completely meant it to be taken as weed, because tis what it be! "your love of the halflings weed has slowed your mind gandalf!" - Saruman. How many people do YOU know that can make cool 3D moving object out of smoke? (any kind)
User avatar #62 to #53 - Kanoah (01/12/2013) [-]
That wasn't even spelled correctly.
User avatar #70 to #53 - cameronrox (01/12/2013) [-]
I duno, i feel fine, but like the hulk my seething rage knows no bounds!
#50 to #47 - pineapplepeople ONLINE (01/12/2013) [-]
Because I am attempting to have an intelligent conversation with someone and hope they prove they are more than just another retarded stoner. And if we're citing fictional characters as our personal acquaintances to answer each other's questions, then I'm gonna go with god. He made the universe from nothing, I think he can make a 'cool 3D moving object out of smoke'.
User avatar #56 to #50 - cameronrox (01/12/2013) [-]
1- False. Bears are best.

2- God isn't real, and is not the main protagonist in any novels, your weak counter point leads me to believe it is YOU who may not only be "another retarded stoner", but a cantankerous stereotyping asshat! Do not bring religion into this. Do not.

3- You are a liar... and a vagabond who enjoys sodomy. Harumph. Intelligent conversation you say, but you and your snide comments have started this arguement and theres no turning back now!

4- God dammit man Gandalf is a fictional character! Stop feeding me ammo!



#60 to #56 - pineapplepeople ONLINE (01/12/2013) [-]
1-Okay?
2-That's why I listed him as a fictional character and never specified him as a main character. This debunks the rest of your comment, so I'll just say work on your interpretation skills.
3-( **** this is fun) I have not once lied, nor do I prefer penile shafts to vaginal canals. Intelligent conversations are quite possible to maintain while still being hostile, provided both parties possess a shred of wit. In fact, it is one of my favorite hobbies.
4- Yes he is. Now bite the bullet.
User avatar #69 to #60 - cameronrox (01/12/2013) [-]
1-seventeen

2- In context to the rest of out conversation, which YOU might need to sharpen your interpretation skills on, all examples have been from real life books. You can use god for any example. ANY. Example. Now write another response to number two!

3- Sodomy as in your copulate with animals.

4- There are too many replys to this, whatever you may think of us "retarded stoners", ive got better things to do than slam my head into my keyboard all night. GOOD NIGHT, SER.
#76 to #69 - pineapplepeople ONLINE (01/12/2013) [-]
1- Tralse
2- Are you implying the edge chronicles are based in real events? Or that the bible isn't a 'real life book?' Just wondering what you're saying before I tell you how wrong you are.
3- That's true. But I'm very picky. I only accept Homo Sapiens. (and a few close cousins)
4- I was merely making a play on words. I happen to like stoners a lot actually. My best friend is quite the, um, token pothead? I just don't like when people bring their inhaling/ exhaling habits into every facet of their lives. I suggest using your fingers next time. Good night Cameron.
#32 to #30 - swagbot (01/12/2013) [-]
chill out slut

it's just a joke.
#33 to #32 - pineapplepeople ONLINE (01/12/2013) [-]
At this point, becoming more chill is a physical impossibility. I am currently as chill as an eskimo's nutsack.
#41 to #33 - cameronrox (01/12/2013) [-]
Which is a body part they like to keep nice and toasty thank you very much.  what, do they run around the great north with their willies hanging out?  your groin is also one of the warmest/biggest heat producing area on your body.
Which is a body part they like to keep nice and toasty thank you very much. what, do they run around the great north with their willies hanging out? your groin is also one of the warmest/biggest heat producing area on your body.
#43 to #41 - pineapplepeople ONLINE (01/12/2013) [-]
I see, and tell me good sir how you came to acquire this knowledge of the nature of northern natives nads?
User avatar #49 to #43 - cameronrox (01/12/2013) [-]
mmm dat alliteration. well sonny let me tell you about this magical place called yellowknife! Far to the north where the spit freezes in the air, and your eyeballs frost if you dont blink fast enough, you will find these brave men. And you will find they are just like you and me, and dont all think seal eyeballs "taste like icecream". They dont want a cold penis anymore than you or I my friend.
#55 to #49 - pineapplepeople ONLINE (01/12/2013) [-]
Thank you, I enjoyed writing that. As for the simile I used earlier it was more to establish an easy to understand counterpoint than to hold any semblance of accuracy. If you desire I shall craft a more suitable comparison to suit your tastes. How's this: "chiller than Walt Disney's corpse"?
User avatar #58 to #55 - cameronrox (01/12/2013) [-]
Walt disney was a powerful and very rich man, he could have had any funeral arrangements he desired, heated coffin, sleeping bag, the boiling blood of cthulu. Also he was cremated so the last remnants of his corpse were pretty ******* warm.
#63 to #58 - pineapplepeople ONLINE (01/12/2013) [-]
Yes, but there is a popular urban legend that he was frozen in an attempt to save him for a resurrection (or treatment, depends on the legend you hear) to be performed in the future.
User avatar #66 to #63 - cameronrox (01/12/2013) [-]
"urban legend". i dont think i need to say anymore.
#67 to #66 - pineapplepeople ONLINE (01/12/2013) [-]
A comparison can play off of something that isn't necessarily true. If it couldn't poetry would be much duller.
#83 to #30 - ohhitheree (01/12/2013) [-]
....They use pipeweed which is tobacco. A legal drug.
#88 to #83 - pineapplepeople ONLINE (01/12/2013) [-]
I am not well versed in the many varieties or flammable, recreational plants, as I have no interest in using them.
User avatar #51 to #30 - supersaiyajin (01/12/2013) [-]
Tolkien specifically stated later on that the material being smoked was tobacco, NOT marijuana. I love how stoners make a big deal out of it, as if 'weed' automatically means 'pot'.
User avatar #65 to #51 - cameronrox (01/12/2013) [-]
Because Tolkien knows how much the public enjoys their wacky tobacky! Hey, you may be right. I may be right. We may both be wrong and its magical pixie dust. Who said anything about it being pot? Your the first person bringing that up ser. All context to weed was in reference to LOTR, and whatever the substance may be! While everyones combined efforts are indeed turning this into a "big deal", I just enjoyed the connections you could make between the ravenous always hungry hobbits, their love of weed & other quirky jests in the movies. Har!
#82 to #22 - ohhitheree (01/12/2013) [-]
Have you seen those smoke rings?
+5
#61 to #21 - felinescrotum **User deleted account** has deleted their comment [-]
User avatar #72 to #61 - cameronrox (01/12/2013) [-]
Your on the internet, what do you expect? I could find even more mentally challenged arguments if you fancy. not hard really, you have to wade through a dozen to reach the real comment section gold.
+4
#75 to #72 - felinescrotum **User deleted account** has deleted their comment [-]
#136 - felixjarl ONLINE (01/12/2013) [-]
This image has expired
#116 - skinless (01/12/2013) [-]
Comment Picture
#3 - anon (01/11/2013) [-]
It is quite funny if you have read the books and then look movies.
He can not summon eagles, in LOTR eagle king should be wearing crown, they stayed for night @ eagels (hobbit ending - they flew away). In hobbit eagles spotted action in woods and wanted to get part in it.
User avatar #110 - pedobubblegum (01/12/2013) [-]
wow, that Ironic. I was listening to this when I saw this:
http://www . youtube . com/ watch?v=UJ4xA5Cggp4&list=LLoSJPZd-sviFd_SQ2p5y0qQ
#111 to #110 - koshana (01/12/2013) [-]
I don't mean to be that guy, but it'd be a coincidence, not irony.
User avatar #112 to #111 - pedobubblegum (01/12/2013) [-]
well coincidences are sometimes Irony.
#113 to #112 - koshana (01/12/2013) [-]
Not in this case. =P
#127 to #112 - anon (01/12/2013) [-]
not ever
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