Retarded Dreams. People tell me dreams can be interpreted. That's probably .. we been having a lot at retarded dreams meld. these are a iew I decided to draw ou i bit my own Dick Once by accident sharks
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Retarded Dreams

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Retarded Dreams. People tell me dreams can be interpreted. That's probably .. we been having a lot at retarded dreams meld. these are a iew I decided to draw ou

People tell me dreams can be interpreted. That's probably ******** .

we been having a lot at retarded dreams meld. these
are a iew I decided to draw out.
film
or dent.
s baer
...
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Views: 74690
Favorited: 207
Submitted: 12/10/2012
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Comments(284):

[ 284 comments ]
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#5 - jaak (12/10/2012) [-]
My dreams are mostly Tom Hanks' head on animal's bodies.
My dreams are mostly Tom Hanks' head on animal's bodies.
User avatar #6 to #5 - prodick (12/10/2012) [-]
Even in the internet you are a weido
#7 to #6 - jaak (12/10/2012) [-]
shhhh Tom Hanks is a puppy
shhhh Tom Hanks is a puppy
#11 to #7 - captainwow ONLINE (12/10/2012) [-]
I wish I had your dreams..
#27 to #11 - jaak (12/10/2012) [-]
maybe if I post more....
maybe if I post more....
#30 to #27 - jaak (12/10/2012) [-]
... you can share my dreams
... you can share my dreams
#40 to #30 - prodick (12/10/2012) [-]
Good, good everything is going accordinf to the plan
Good, good everything is going accordinf to the plan
#41 to #40 - jaak (12/10/2012) [-]
MFW
MFW
#71 to #41 - jaak (12/10/2012) [-]
I'll just post some more because, why the 			****		 not.
I'll just post some more because, why the **** not.
#77 to #71 - prodick (12/10/2012) [-]
Conan O'Brien!!! Holy ******* ********* now you're talking my language. He's our golden God. I demand moar!
#79 to #77 - jaak (12/10/2012) [-]
leik dis?
leik dis?
#89 to #82 - jaak (12/10/2012) [-]
and I am afraid that was my last T. Hanks = Conan GIF I have
and I am afraid that was my last T. Hanks = Conan GIF I have
#93 to #89 - prodick (12/10/2012) [-]
No matter, thanks for the effort. You are truly a hero FJ needs
#103 to #93 - jaak (12/10/2012) [-]
neat.
0
#91 to #89 - prodick has deleted their comment [-]
#72 - afreeti ONLINE (12/10/2012) [-]
i don't know whether i should go to sleep and never wake up
or never sleep again
User avatar #137 to #72 - haveagoodone (12/11/2012) [-]
i love xkcd
#65 - ihatem (12/10/2012) [-]
I had a dream that this nation rose up and live out the true meaning of its creed: "We hold these truths to be self-evident: that all men are created equal."
I had a dream that on the red hills of Georgia the sons of former slaves and the sons of former slave owners were able to sit down together at the table of brotherhood.
I had a dream that even the state of Mississippi, a state sweltering with the heat of injustice, sweltering with the heat of oppression, transformed into an oasis of freedom and justice.
I had a dream that my four little children lived in a nation where they weren't judged by the color of their skin but by the content of their character.
I had a dream last night.
I had a dream, down in Alabama, with its vicious racists, with its governor having his lips dripping with the words of interposition and nullification; right there in Alabama, little black boys and black girls were able to join hands with little white boys and white girls as sisters and brothers.
I had a dream last night.
I had a dream that every valley was exalted, every hill and mountain was made low, the rough places were made plain, and the crooked places were made straight, and the glory of the Lord was revealed, and all flesh saw it together.

So how wuz ur dreemz guise?
#66 to #65 - justtocomment (12/10/2012) [-]
I dreamed that I could ******* fly and be invisible and move through walls!
+44
#15 - amandatoddd **User deleted account** has deleted their comment [-]
#294 - jettripleseven (12/11/2012) [-]
Ever since I was a little kid I've been having this dream where I'm on a ferris wheel, except the ferris wheel is floating on a buoy in the middle of the ocean in a dark storm with lightning flashing around. The waves lap up over the buoy, so every time I get to the bottom of the ferris wheel, this ignant-ass 			*************		 great white shark jumps up on a wave and tries to eat me. I always try to punch it in the nose, but I miss every time and it just falls. Then I have to mentally prepare myself for the next rotation and how I'll defend myself against the shark.    
   
Some day I'm going to punch that wise-ass 			************		 right in his toothy mouth.    
   
Pic related, it's the 			************		.
Ever since I was a little kid I've been having this dream where I'm on a ferris wheel, except the ferris wheel is floating on a buoy in the middle of the ocean in a dark storm with lightning flashing around. The waves lap up over the buoy, so every time I get to the bottom of the ferris wheel, this ignant-ass ************* great white shark jumps up on a wave and tries to eat me. I always try to punch it in the nose, but I miss every time and it just falls. Then I have to mentally prepare myself for the next rotation and how I'll defend myself against the shark.

Some day I'm going to punch that wise-ass ************ right in his toothy mouth.

Pic related, it's the ************ .
User avatar #311 to #294 - Juigiknows (12/11/2012) [-]
Somehow i can relate to this.... but i can't figure out how..
User avatar #328 to #294 - razerblazer (12/11/2012) [-]
I...know exactly what this dream means...do you want to hear?
User avatar #332 to #331 - razerblazer (12/11/2012) [-]
It means there is a certain goal or acomplishment that you constantly strive for your entire life, but every oppertunity you get to acheive it you **** up and you plan and wait for the time around for your chance, and an example for this is that for years youve trtied to impress your drunk father, but everything you do, everything you try, he is unimpressed and gives you no sort of affection because of it, and each time you try harder and harder....and if you need more detail jjust PM me it gets personal
User avatar #333 to #332 - jettripleseven (12/11/2012) [-]
Yeah, I guess I never thought of it like that, except my dad's been sober since college.
User avatar #334 to #333 - razerblazer (12/11/2012) [-]
it was an example, same thing can happen to someone you love, school, or trying to defeat this lifetime bully or reoccuring bullys
User avatar #4 - sepheroth (12/10/2012) [-]
I'm pretty sure the second one means you have to stop masturbating in public restrooms
User avatar #8 to #4 - hemming (12/10/2012) [-]
He haven't fapped in a public restroom, he's only dreaming of doing it, which means he probably really wants to do it...
User avatar #10 to #8 - sepheroth (12/10/2012) [-]
How sure of that statement are you? Because I'm pretty sure he has.
User avatar #13 to #10 - hemming (12/10/2012) [-]
Well, The title is "Retarded Dreams"
And in the description he talks about dreams can be interpreted, but he doubts this, because his dreams are ******* stupid...
User avatar #14 to #13 - sepheroth (12/10/2012) [-]
You don't get jokes very often, do you?
User avatar #36 to #14 - hemming (12/10/2012) [-]
Text + Sarcasm = My weakness. :c
User avatar #37 to #36 - hemming (12/10/2012) [-]
Also im writing a 20 page report about the inkas, my brain is toast atm...
User avatar #39 to #37 - sepheroth (12/10/2012) [-]
Haha, it's understandable. I think I pissed some chick off this same way on another thread.
Good luck!
User avatar #45 to #39 - hemming (12/10/2012) [-]
Haha, well carry on with that.
And thanks!
#119 - zumzizeroo (12/10/2012) [-]
I recently learned to lucid dream and i have to say theyre some of the most amazing experiences ive had in recent memory. the downside is i can only do it when i nap but my normal dreams have become vivid to the point where i can identify the type of wood paneling the floors.   
MFW I wake up from the equivalent of a movie i wrote and starred in myself.
I recently learned to lucid dream and i have to say theyre some of the most amazing experiences ive had in recent memory. the downside is i can only do it when i nap but my normal dreams have become vivid to the point where i can identify the type of wood paneling the floors.
MFW I wake up from the equivalent of a movie i wrote and starred in myself.
User avatar #153 to #119 - infinitereaper ONLINE (12/11/2012) [-]
Aw man. Lucky. I lost my ability to WILD and can't stay lucid for more than a few minutes. I think somethings wrong with me.
User avatar #274 to #119 - TheBanana (12/11/2012) [-]
u should uhhh idk, share how to do it
User avatar #339 to #274 - zumzizeroo (12/11/2012) [-]
I gave a basic tutorial below
#281 to #119 - perfide (12/11/2012) [-]
How do you learn that?
User avatar #289 to #119 - meganinja ONLINE (12/11/2012) [-]
I used to be able to lucid dream, but it always woke me up almost immidiately, and then I lost the ability, almost like my brain said "You ****** it up, i'm taking your privlidges away"
#125 to #119 - fiddyone (12/10/2012) [-]
I've heard so much about this! I also heard is meant to be quite dangerous if you look into a mirror during the dream? I forget the logic behind it however. Do you mind me asking, how do you do it?
User avatar #130 to #125 - zumzizeroo (12/10/2012) [-]
i had to train myself for a few months, starting with remembering my dreams. the better your recall, the easier it is to lucid dream. just think about remembering them while you try to sleep and you will eventually recall 2 to 4 dreams a night. keep on this path and the lucid dream will happen, just dont expect it right away. youll know youre getting close if your dreams start getting really detailed and vivid.
User avatar #135 to #125 - zumzizeroo (12/10/2012) [-]
also, you cant lucid dream unless you know you're in the dream, the way to check is to feel the walls (apparently they are intangible in dreams), or like you said, look in a mirror and try to see if anything's off. the first time i learned i was in a dream i woke up though so it takes a few tries
User avatar #128 to #119 - swagasaurusrex (12/10/2012) [-]
Just to say apparently if all else fails the only way you can wake up is by your dream scaring the ******** out of you. just what i heard
User avatar #134 to #128 - mynameisnotmike (12/10/2012) [-]
Usually realizing you arent breathing does it for me
User avatar #131 to #128 - zumzizeroo (12/10/2012) [-]
That isnt true, at least for me. I get kicked out of my lucid dreams all the time. it seems to happen when i try to do something fantastical so i eventually learned that i have to keep my dreams slightly realistic for them to last longer
#235 - parrotey (12/11/2012) [-]
The weirdest dream I had was one where I witnessed Michael Jackson in werewolf form battling optimus prime in the middle of the woods. I was so freaked out I woke up and puked all over my bed.
#140 - pedobearsepicness (12/11/2012) [-]
>be me at age 15   
>i sleep with no clothes on   
>intensely horny   
>go to sleep one night with massive boner   
>having dream about this girl who i know and were pretty good friends   
>she gives me bj   
>rough sex ensues   
*sidenote she was a squirter   
>im about to cum   
>in real life mom walks into room to wake me up   
>she wakes me up as i cum   
>cum all over mom   
>she runs out of my room   
>she trips face first onto coffee table   
>MFW
>be me at age 15
>i sleep with no clothes on
>intensely horny
>go to sleep one night with massive boner
>having dream about this girl who i know and were pretty good friends
>she gives me bj
>rough sex ensues
*sidenote she was a squirter
>im about to cum
>in real life mom walks into room to wake me up
>she wakes me up as i cum
>cum all over mom
>she runs out of my room
>she trips face first onto coffee table
>MFW
User avatar #262 to #140 - theghostrider (12/11/2012) [-]
Okaaaay....
#9 - phanact (12/10/2012) [-]
I had a dream where two FJers I know, a guy and a girl who were like... I dunno, I guess they were close.

I had a dream where one of them raped the other. But she actually gave consent so it wasn't rape, and I had to stop the attorney from finding the guy and arresting him for raping her when he really didn't do that

This happened in norway
I've never been to norway
#367 to #9 - John Cena (02/03/2015) [-]
confusion
User avatar #1 - mayormilkman (12/10/2012) [-]
I think the first one implies that Abraham Lincoln was actually some sort of bacteria.
#3 to #1 - sepheroth (12/10/2012) [-]
Who the **** you callin' bacteria?! You don't know me! You don't know my life! Step off ***** !
#193 - lolzordz (12/11/2012) [-]
is anyone else starting to notice humor nowadays is dependent on being really random to be funny
#203 to #193 - neelix (12/11/2012) [-]
I wouldn't say it's dependent, but people do seem to find random things a lot more funny than when I was younger which is quite annoying.
User avatar #222 to #193 - AquariusCyclone (12/11/2012) [-]
I agree. There are some people in my school who are genuinely funny, while others just yell "random" things and post "random" statuses in capital letters.
+10
#175 - oxytoxic **User deleted account** has deleted their comment [-]
User avatar #12 - baracknessmonster (12/10/2012) [-]
I had a dream that I became president, and the first thing I did was drain all of the ocean water and ship it to space, just to reduce the number of shark attacks
#263 - mytrakytra (12/11/2012) [-]
This image has expired
Last night I had a dream about you
In this dream I'm dancing right besides you
and it looks like everyone was having fun
the kind of feeling I waited so long
#301 to #263 - harbingerwolf (12/11/2012) [-]
OOO, i dont know what to do...
OOO, i dont know what to do...
#139 - MisterGir (12/11/2012) [-]
last night I had a dream that I was in the woods with my black friend and we came to an opening and when I looked around I saw a dead deer that had been shot in the neck laying there in a pool of blood. We kept going and I found a camelback (backpack water bottle kinda thing) on the ground with 666 written on it. It was filled with the deer's blood. My black friend looked at it and turned to me and said "You're taking this too far dude!" and then I woke up. mfw
User avatar #116 - DisgruntledTomato ONLINE (12/10/2012) [-]
Here is a weird dream for you
> Was at a beach party with some friends on a pier of all places
> Pretty ******* weird as we all had the same towel whatever
> Anyway I was smoking a little bit of bud on the seafront
> My friend suddenly charges into me and knocks my joint underneath the dock
> So I got really pissed and went "go and ******* get that"
> So he went under then dock and was hunting around
> Turning over a few rocks looking for it
> Finally see this rock which is standing out from the rest.
> But It wasn't a rock
> It was a rock lobster
#122 to #116 - azsx (12/10/2012) [-]
6.5/10
#199 - shmedly (12/11/2012) [-]
i find myself asking this question in every dream i have
i find myself asking this question in every dream i have
User avatar #169 - classyfish (12/11/2012) [-]
Those dreams are normal next to mine son. The last one I remember.
>wake up on a pile of a hay
>stand up put hand in the hay
>take out a needle
>attached is a rope
>pull rope
>rope pulls back
>I fall inside
>I fall forever before landing on a ring of Saturn.
>The justice league is the but Morgan Freeman plays the Green Lantern and I'm the flash
>Then this evil dude comes out of nowhere and we all go into action mode
>he kills everyone but me
>Then I hear a voice that says "his defeat lies in you're pockets"
>reach in my pocket pull out a glasses case
>inside case is the word friendship written on a paper
>I throw it at him
>he turns all nice and brings the rest of them back to life
>Wake up.
User avatar #171 to #169 - classyfish (12/11/2012) [-]
there but Morgan*
your pockets*
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