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Submitted: 12/04/2012
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Comments(304):

[ 304 comments ]
What do you think? Give us your opinion. Anonymous comments allowed.
#18 - recoveryone ONLINE (12/05/2012) [-]
STFU SUPERBITCH!!!
#346 to #166 - recoveryone ONLINE (12/05/2012) [-]
I don't think so...
#223 to #18 - anon (12/05/2012) [-]
Hey i got that comic it's HUSH :)
User avatar #224 to #18 - orionar (12/05/2012) [-]
Hey i got that comic it's HUSH ....
#103 - Ihazfunkitty (12/05/2012) [-]
Comment Picture
#150 to #103 - anon (12/05/2012) [-]
**anonymous rolls 44**
#82 - Lambda (12/05/2012) [-]
User avatar #89 to #82 - KingBoo (12/05/2012) [-]
LOL!
User avatar #189 to #89 - nefarian (12/05/2012) [-]
helaughedgethim.gif
#208 - carbondioxide (12/05/2012) [-]
Comment Picture
#228 - yentabear (12/05/2012) [-]
And now we wait for the **** ending.
#239 to #228 - amuro (12/05/2012) [-]
You talk like they were filming a porn movie...


Try to read Action Comics #592 – 593
#96 - thereisaguy ONLINE (12/05/2012) [-]
Super gay too
#64 - phanact (12/05/2012) [-]
I was just under the impression he was gay

I mean
Spandex

And like... his only weakness is a crystal
#209 - amuro (12/05/2012) [-]
Once...
#136 - anaphase (12/05/2012) [-]
Yeah, I'm sure I'd say "wtf" when being ripped in two by a supernatural being.
Yeah, I'm sure I'd say "wtf" when being ripped in two by a supernatural being.
User avatar #199 to #136 - Vpirate (12/05/2012) [-]
>supernatural

He's an alien.
#52 - anon (12/05/2012) [-]
Psh.... Superman Couldn't do **** to Batman....he kind of has Kryptonite in his utility belt.
User avatar #149 to #52 - angelious (12/05/2012) [-]
superman going all out moves so fast that batman doesnt even have time to react.
User avatar #247 to #149 - awesomanium (12/05/2012) [-]
But when he's normal, he'd never kill Batman, and if he's gone ******* insane then Batman would probably realise.
User avatar #252 to #247 - angelious (12/05/2012) [-]
i dont think he would realize it fast enough for it to actually help him. Considering superman could just "nuke" earth via heath vision...


and even when normal superman has ways to deal with kryptonite and other sort of monkey business.

#266 to #52 - saladtongsofdeath (12/05/2012) [-]
except for the fact that he can freaking move at the speed of ******* light and he could just tear him in half before batman can even think about taking out the kryptonite
#340 to #290 - franklyimaperson (12/05/2012) [-]
Flash doesn't take **** from no body

He punched that Zum ****** at escape velocity
#78 - lametitan ONLINE (12/05/2012) [-]
Who knows what evil plans Superman has in store for poor Spidey!
User avatar #212 - manbob (12/05/2012) [-]
Batman actually had plans in order to kill every member of the justice league, just in case they started to become corrupt. Also he had gauntlets specifically made with kryptonite in metal so he could kick the **** out of superman.
User avatar #231 to #212 - conoriskool (12/05/2012) [-]
> Superman uses x ray vision from afar
> sees Kryptonite
> Heat Vision
The End
#233 to #231 - lastsamurai (12/05/2012) [-]
That's the superlative positive for superman. Being in the air and deciding he wanted to kill him, thinking of the best plan. Not knowing batman's plans.

The superlative positive for batman would be to.. Well, he's extremely smart, so almost any situation could be dealt with.

Batman>superman
User avatar #235 to #233 - conoriskool (12/05/2012) [-]
I'm saying Batman can only kill Superman in close quarters, if you're talking about Batman murdering him well then yeah he could, but if superman was
fighting him in a scrape he new was to the death, he has the option of not letting him get close and just using heat vision.
#236 to #235 - lastsamurai (12/05/2012) [-]
Batman would've shot cryptonite at him.
He was prepared to take out Superman, which means he HAS to carry some quantities of cryptonite, launchable or maybe even in his glove.

Superman gets weaker just by being close to cryptonite.
And you know how much superman loves to hold his enemies and hit them.
User avatar #237 to #236 - conoriskool (12/05/2012) [-]
Superman can fly fast enough to turn back time, pretty sure he could avoid any glowing green projectiles being launched his was from a distance. You should watch some clips of Clark Kent running in the Show "Smallville" for some perspective of just how fast he moves. look up a video on youtube called "Smallville Speed Force Running" for some clips
#238 to #237 - Lulzilla ONLINE (12/05/2012) [-]
Smallville, Really? SMALLVILLE. Go home. No get out of you damn house and go across to the pedophiles house with a sign that says "I'm ready". If your going to base your information on T.V shows that have a million flaws in them might as well say Super Man can turn into a Transformer.
User avatar #240 to #238 - conoriskool (12/05/2012) [-]
I was using it as a comparison you moron, he can turn back time in in the comic books so he's even faster in them, I mentioned smallville cause it gives you comparisons of his speed relative to the people around him, so before batman can even pick his nose
Superman would have crossed the ****** globe.
#245 to #240 - Lulzilla ONLINE (12/05/2012) [-]
If your going to use a comparison use the comic books not some bull 			****		 T.V show that is filled with flaws. Superman can never kill Batman. WE KNOW THIS. Batman has schemes for everything. Do you SERIOUSLY think Batman would over look "Oh, 			****		...He's flying now. I can't reach him". Seriously? Do you honestly think that?
If your going to use a comparison use the comic books not some bull **** T.V show that is filled with flaws. Superman can never kill Batman. WE KNOW THIS. Batman has schemes for everything. Do you SERIOUSLY think Batman would over look "Oh, **** ...He's flying now. I can't reach him". Seriously? Do you honestly think that?
#254 to #245 - oedad (12/05/2012) [-]
read the comics superman could split the earth into two with a single punch if he wanted to, he can move many times faster than light, he can survive unaided in outer space, his bones are many times stronger than the strongest alloy ever developed if batman got the jump on superman and snuck up behind him with superman having no knowing or reason to suspect maybe he could do some damage with kryptonite gloves, but if superman even whiffed a scent of something up it would be all over
User avatar #249 to #245 - CrashingSea (12/05/2012) [-]
It's people like you and last samurai up there that tick me off... "Batman has a plan for EVERYTHING!" Well... It's pretty frickin hard to stop a heat vision to the face if Superman just suddenly had an idea to kill him. If Batman knew someone wanted to kill him is one thing, but if he's surprised by it, he's dead... That's all there is to it... Yes he has plans to take out the other superheroes, but if any of them surprise him out of the blue, (and provided they are actually trying to kill him, not just injure) then he's a dead man.
#256 to #249 - Lulzilla ONLINE (12/05/2012) [-]
I don't think you quite understand, Kid. Why the **** would Superman would randomly go "Hey, Batman. **** you -Laser eyes-.". It's never going to happen. Batman would be able to tell when Superman is acting funny and would lash out. Batman one of the smartest people in D.C for NO REASON. Superman may have super powers but he's been shown to be unable to control them and let his feelings get the better of him. BATMAN has gone toe to toe with GODS, Celestial beings and WON. Quit making Superman this immortal, unbeatable guy just because daddy will never love you.
User avatar #261 to #256 - CrashingSea (12/05/2012) [-]
YOU'RE the one making Batman some undefeatable bad ass when the author's just downplay everyone so Batman can take him out. Yeah he's smart but the point of the matter is super powered reactions. Superman can go faster than Batman will ever manage and even if it wasn't heat vision by the time Batman could see and react Superman would've been able to circle the globe twice, stop for a cup of coffee, take a **** , and then punch him in the face. And Flash could do that 10 times over before Batman could do any friggin thing.

It's not making out excuses, it's the truth. Yeah, Batman has "plans" but the truth is in any real life situation where these heroes would turn evil, they wouldn't just pander about so Batman could do something... They'd kill him. The problem with this argument is that it's all theoretical. Yeah, we know it wouldn't just happen like that, but IF IT DID is what we're saying.
#268 to #261 - Lulzilla ONLINE (12/05/2012) [-]
It's been proven in the damn comics. There are plenty of these on the internet if you want to look for yourself. If Superman was just walking beside batman and he just wanted to kill him he couldn't because of the kryponite batman has on him. If he decided to kill him and batman wasn't around Batman would get word of supermans little plot. Batmans MAIN exploit or power is FEAR. Batman would snatch up Louis Lane in an instant. Superman wouldn't DARE to hurt Louis Lane. If Superman wanted to kill Bats then the other super heroes would stop Superman before he could time travel. You obviously have NOT thought about it. You put 0 effort into actually thinking what would go down. If your going to make pretend fights at LEAST use your damn brain.
User avatar #287 to #268 - metajunky (12/05/2012) [-]
part 1

DKR - Bats, after 20 years of planning, gets his ribs broke, his fancy suit torn to shreds, suffers a heart attack, and ends up in the ground. His entire plan relies on Superman holding back and NOT simply unplugging Bruce from his lamp-post or disabling him from space (if Supes really just wanted Bruce to turn himself in, rather than getting into a dangerous fist fight)... in other words, poor writing for Supes (out of character motivation, out of character intellect/tactics), who could have undid the Bat's plan easily.

Hush - Bats breaks his hand & resorts to thug-level hostage tactics, while admiting he doesn't stand a chance. Honestly, he just gets in one good punch (that breaks his hand) shortly after, Supes smashes through the street and effortlessly lifts a car in each hand, no worse for wear. His plan needlessly puts himself at risk and relied entirely on Clark holding back/being good, which he had no logical grounds on which the make that assumption... having a "gut feeling" that Clark can resist mind control does not constitute a good plan.

Red Son - Dies. Despite all his prep, he didn't account for Superman's allies, which he has in spades and certainly on a different power-level than- say- the Bat Family. If anything is true of Supes, it's that he has many friends that would readily risk life and limb for his sake- heck, in the regular universe, Batman considers himself one of that number... any plan meant to take Supes out has to take into account his allies, friends, family, robots, pets, etc.

Babel - Years of planning on how to stop a rogue Superman... result: an expensive synthetic rock that makes Superman MORE powerful (and doesn't even prevent him from using his powers with surgical precision). Wow. Brilliant.
User avatar #289 to #287 - metajunky (12/05/2012) [-]
part 2

Babel - Years of planning on how to stop a rogue Superman... result: an expensive synthetic rock that makes Superman MORE powerful (and doesn't even prevent him from using his powers with surgical precision). Wow. Brilliant.

Superman/Batman #2 - Owned. This is in Batman's home turf, the ideal situation to combat Superman and to enact all the theoretical plans his fans have long believed he has against a rogue Superman... but the result? Bruce isn't even Future Supes's target yet he's a breath away from death if not for a save from present-day Supes.

Lex Luthor:Man of Steel - Batman with kryptonite and prep, defeated handily by Superman. Arguably one of the most realistic portrayals of how Supes could still defeat Batman without instantly killing him regardless of Bat-prep.

Superman: King of The World - Batman with prep and kryptonite fails to stop Superman from being able to crush his throat... only with the intervention of Green Lantern and Martian Manhunter is Supes stopped. Here we see danger of Superman with limited prep, the legions of his similarly powered Superman robots.

Sacrifice - Again, Batman, king of protocols, the man entrusted with the Kryptonite ring as a symbol of trust and the express responsibility of stopping Superman should he go rogue by Superman himself... finds himself in said situation and instead of pulling out "always prepared anti-Supes plan" finds himself beaten to near death saved only by the Plot Gods
User avatar #291 to #289 - metajunky (12/05/2012) [-]
part 3

nfinite Crisis - After the last beating, you'd think Batman would create more comprehensive plans for taking out Superman and/or Superman-class enemies. Granted Kal-L is probably levels above them, but in terms of Anti-SuperBrick Planning, once again, Bruce fails... his entire defense the Kryptonite ring. Even if it were Kal-El and not Kal-L, it's highly questionable whether the ring alone would have been able to stop a motivated rogue Superman considering Supes has wielded the ring himself when fighting other Super-persons. If Batman were truly the master of planning and prep, this certainly should have been taken into consideration.

Final score: Bat Plans Zip; Supes nine of nine.

The only cases where Batman has been able to possibly get a leg up on Supes are when he has acted like a villain and held hostages or lead an assault against an unsuspecting Supes- hardly a feat (consider: who amongst us, with Batman's fortune and training, intimate knowledge of Superman as an ally, and even express consent from said target, WOULDN'T be able to come up with an attack plan against an unsuspecting Supes?). In any case where Supes has had the opportunity to fight back he has either won or been defeated by bad writing
User avatar #275 to #268 - CrashingSea (12/05/2012) [-]
I am, You're saying fights and I'm making fight scenarios. A fight is not where you have an extended period of time between confrontations, that is classified as a war. A fight is a single match, or battle let's say, with no time in between to prepare or "run off and capture Lois Lane." When in reality Superman, if hypothetically turned evil in a moment, can move faster than Batman can EVER react. The Kryptonite is hidden away until brought out. So if they were walking their merry ******* way down the road and Superman gets an evil hair in his ass, he crushes Batman's skull and goes about his malevolent way.

If they weren't together and Superman gets an evil hair, how is Batman going to know that Superman wants to kill him? Is superman just going to randomly start shouting out "Hey, I'm gonna kill Batman, spread the word"? no he's not, if he wanted to kill Batman and he wasn't around, all he'd have to do is ram him at super speed, once again, Batman's dead because he doesn't have faster than lightspeed reaction time.

Also, if Superman is evil, what makes you even think he'd care about Lois? Also, what could the other superheroes do to someone that's indestructible? Hinder, maybe, but stop completely? It's not going to happen like that since Superman is too stinking powerful unfortunately.

As it seems I'm thinking more than you are about these pretend fights since all I'm getting from you is basically "Batman is the smarterest" and he could figure out and know all this damn stuff and react to faster than light speed movement when in reality, or fictional reality even, he can't. He doesn't have that capability. If Superman went truly evil and his morals were reversed, Batman couldn't stop him in the time it'd take for Superman to kill him first.
#333 to #268 - conoriskool (12/05/2012) [-]
You got ****** owned you fool, you should start trying to use your brain instead of telling everybody else to and spouting this ******** "batman has plans hurr" go to bed. Bravo, metajunky , you know your stuff. More than this muppet can say for himself.
User avatar #250 to #245 - conoriskool (12/05/2012) [-]
"Batman has schemes for everything" What a convenient ****** answer you gave for yourself there. Fact of the matter is Superman has all the tools he needs to kill Batman easily, were he so inclined.
What does it matter the comparison I use? I didn't suggest you go watch the ****** series just look at some of the hyper speed scenes FOR COMPARISON. So Superman is a couple hundred yards away, in the sky firing heat vision, suggest a "scheme" for that.
User avatar #253 to #237 - Fgner (12/05/2012) [-]
Okay, Superman isn't actually weakened by the crystal, but by the radiation emitted by it. Therefore, all Batman has to do is have a device that amplifies the radiation over a large area - Hell, he could put it over the entire world since it does virtually nothing to anything or anyone other than Superman - and Superman would immediately be weakened upon entering the field. You can't see the field, he can't read minds, and even if he saw the device, he'd have no idea what it did. Therefore he would have no knowledge of the massive field, and all Batman would have to do is hide somewhere where the only way to reach him was to enter the field. Then Superman drops like a fly, and Batman rapes his **** since Superman can't do ******* anything without his powers. If you want to use more Smallville reference, I believe there is an episode where Clark ends up being kidnapped by stupid ******* teenagers. That is the immense power of our Superman. Can't even outsmart teenagers to not get in the situation, and can't even do well enough when he get's in the situation to get away.
User avatar #259 to #253 - conoriskool (12/05/2012) [-]
Well he's a teenager himself in that episode, the whole point of Smallville is to see him grow up from a dumb kid into a superhero. These are a lot of "what ifs.." that people are using to support batman, oh what if batman suddenly created a giant kryptonite t rex that shoots kryptonite at the speed of sound out of it's nipples. Superman still gets my vote
User avatar #260 to #259 - Fgner (12/05/2012) [-]
I think that T-Rex is actually more powerful than both of them. That's my vote.
#219 to #212 - kraetyz (12/05/2012) [-]
Because he's the goddamned Batman.
#272 - ianosity ONLINE (12/05/2012) [-]
#20 - jlamb (12/05/2012) [-]
User avatar #146 - dementedllama (12/05/2012) [-]
I'm pretty sure in the justice league cartoons and the comics, Batman carries ways to neutralize each one of the other heroes at all times in case they ever go rogue.
User avatar #157 to #146 - heartlessrobot ONLINE (12/05/2012) [-]
They're called "The Contingency Plans". And not neutralize, kill. At any time, he could kill any member of the Justice League.
User avatar #186 to #157 - dementedllama (12/05/2012) [-]
If I remember correctly, the one for The Flash is basically some kind of bullet or injection that causes strokes or heart attacks at light speed.
#108 - lookatmyhouseofwax (12/05/2012) [-]
**lookatmyhouseofwax rolled a random image posted in comment #257 at Simon's Swag is over 9000 ** Explain this ********
User avatar #151 to #108 - blackcomet (12/05/2012) [-]
In on of the old movies Superman turned back time by flying around the world so fast in the opposite direction that the earth reversed it's revolution. Time went backwards, and he set time back in motion by flying around and spinning it in it's original orbit.
So, He killed Batman and turn back time.
+10
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#59 - gryx (12/05/2012) [-]
Batman already beat the 			****		 out of Superman in one of Frank Miller's comics.
Batman already beat the **** out of Superman in one of Frank Miller's comics.
User avatar #123 to #59 - admiralen (12/05/2012) [-]
>implying frank miller ever wrote a batman comic and not a crazy steve comic
>implying frank miller isnt completely insane
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