Mechanics Humor. When Airline mechanics have a sense of humor. After every flight. FEDEX pilots out a form, known as a "gripe sheet" to tell mechanics about pro
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Mechanics Humor

When Airline mechanics have a sense of humor

After every flight. FEDEX pilots out a form, known
as a "gripe sheet" to tell mechanics about problems
with the aircraft. The mechanics fix the problem, and
then document their repairs on the form.
Here are some actual maintenance problems submitted
by the pilots (marked with a "PH and the solutions
recorded [marked by an "5") by maintenance
engineers, who by the way have a sense of humor:
P: Left inside main tire almost needs replacement.
St Left Inside main the almost replaced.
P: Test flight UK, except dutchland very rough.
St Dutchland not installed on this aircraft.
P: Something loose in cockpit
5: Something tightened in cockpit
P: Dead bugs on windshield
St Live bugs on back order.
Pt Auto pilot in mode produces a 200
feet per minute descent.
St Can' t reproduce problem on the ground.
P: Evidence of leak on right main landing gear.
til: Evidence removed.
P: DME volume unbelievably loud.
St DME volume set more believeable level.
P: Friction locks cause throttle levers to stick.
S: That' s what friction locks are for.
P: IFF inoperative in {FF mode.
S: IFF always inoperative in OFF mode,
P: Suspect crack in windshield.
St Suspect you' re right.
P: Number 3 engine missing.
St Engine found on right wing after brief search.
P: Aircraft handles funny.
S: Aircraft warned to straighten up, tht right and
be serious.
P: Target radar hums.
S: Reprogrammed target radar with lyrics.
P: Mouse in cockpit
St Cat installed in cockpit:
P: Noise coming from under instrument panel.
Sounds like a midget pounding on something
with a hammer.
S: Took hammer away from midget.
...

Comments(59):

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#1 - feralxinsanity (11/22/2012) [+] (3 replies)
"P: Something loose in cockpit.
S: Something tightened in cockpit."

******* lost it.
#7 - ooants (11/23/2012) [+] (2 replies)
Most of these are just the mechanics being dicks.
Most of these are just the mechanics being dicks.
User avatar #9 to #7 - namdelliks (11/23/2012) [-]
You have an odd definition of dick. You also a probably not a fun person.
#26 - oldenglishassassin (11/23/2012) [+] (5 replies)
IFF is not availiable on Fed EX planes. It is strictly a military feature which allows a pilot to determine if a long range radar contact is friendly or not. IFF = Identify Friend or Foe
#5 - magicana (11/23/2012) [+] (1 reply)
This list was originally attributed to Qantas, an Australian international carrier with 0 accidents.
#52 - palestineforlife (11/23/2012) [-]
*******					 lost it at,  "Aircraft warned to straighten up, fly right, and be serious."
******* lost it at, "Aircraft warned to straighten up, fly right, and be serious."
#42 - aerosol ONLINE (11/23/2012) [-]
Target radar after the tune-up.
#11 - urfunnyman (11/23/2012) [-]
Comment Picture
#4 - jtistillam (11/23/2012) [-]
This is still one of the funniest things on the internet.
#55 - fecal ONLINE (11/23/2012) [+] (1 reply)
well that a refreshing collection of complete and utter ******** !
User avatar #58 to #55 - ShadeMinus (11/23/2012) [-]
Doesn't have to be true to be funny bro.
User avatar #48 - CRONIK (11/23/2012) [+] (1 reply)
Seen this 10000 times and have never laughed at it, am i doing something wrong
User avatar #23 - kirkbot ONLINE (11/23/2012) [-]
these are older than the internet
User avatar #19 - tealkangaroo (11/23/2012) [+] (1 reply)
Actually, this was originally from an Australian Air line called QANTAS (qu-one-tus), before it was reposted an uncountable amount of times and switched to FedEx for some reason.
#13 - gjsmothefirst (11/23/2012) [-]
I LMFAO'd.   
Srsly though, this is the hardest I've laughed in a while. I would give you a few thousand thumbs, but I'm limited to one. Sorry. Take it.
I LMFAO'd.
Srsly though, this is the hardest I've laughed in a while. I would give you a few thousand thumbs, but I'm limited to one. Sorry. Take it.
User avatar #8 - namdelliks (11/23/2012) [+] (1 reply)
Holy **** this is gold.
#53 - justbeingcool (11/23/2012) [-]
**justbeingcool rolled a random image posted in comment #91 at straight outta facebook ** huehuheue
User avatar #51 - imthatbrony (11/23/2012) [-]
Who works as the mechanic? Dmitri Martin?
User avatar #31 - malizlewaa (11/23/2012) [-]
P: Content made me laugh. Requesting more.
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