zombie apocalypse. .. With my luck, I'd be chased down by Usain Bolt's zombie and I'd try to escape by jumping into the water, just to meet Michael Phelps's zombie. zombie apocalypse With my luck I'd be chased down by Usain Bolt's and try to escape jumping into the water just meet Michael Phelps's
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#76 - chrisauh
Reply +94
(09/05/2012) [-]
With my luck, I'd be chased down by Usain Bolt's zombie and I'd try to escape by jumping into the water, just to meet Michael Phelps's zombie.
#98 to #76 - MisfitsFan
Reply +25
(09/05/2012) [-]
Plus, Osamas' zombie
Plus, Osamas' zombie
#273 to #98 - fizzled
Reply +2
(09/05/2012) [-]
Hahaha, nice gif. Don't mind me while I take it
Hahaha, nice gif. Don't mind me while I take it
#6 - ronyx
Reply +36
(09/04/2012) [-]
It's about luck really, if you dont get infected in the initial breakout then some asshole with a gun will most likely rape you, take your stuff away and kill you. Actually there are a lot of bad things that can happen to you if you survive the initial breakout.
Get beated up
Get killed
Get raped
Get robbed
Get tortured
Become a slave
etc
#33 to #6 - icameheretotroll ONLINE
Reply 0
(09/04/2012) [-]
Why would a sane person kill or torture another person, they might be only two alive on earth... Why not be 2 instead of 1
#37 to #33 - adriano **User deleted account**
+21
has deleted their comment [-]
#77 to #33 - ronyx
Reply +7
(09/05/2012) [-]
#86 to #6 - piclemaniscool
Reply 0
(09/05/2012) [-]
Hell, if you break a bone you could be pretty much done for without proper medical aid.
#55 to #6 - seventh
Reply +13
(09/04/2012) [-]
Then again, you could also be the person who:
Beats people up
Kills people
Rapes people
Robs people
Tortures people
Enslaves people
etc
#30 to #6 - Denver
Reply +33
(09/04/2012) [-]
Getting beated up would be the worst.
#157 to #30 - huskycreeper
Reply +4
(09/05/2012) [-]
Worstest*
#148 - darthblam
Reply +19
(09/05/2012) [-]
During the riots of chaos and confusion as the zombie apocalypse is happening I would steal the nicest tux I can find so that when I die whatever survivor sees me he will that "Man, that guy must have been rich when he was alive."
#158 to #148 - anon
Reply 0
(09/05/2012) [-]
you are a sad, sad little man
#161 to #158 - darthblam
Reply +27
(09/05/2012) [-]
A sad, little man in a really nice tux.
A sad, little man in a really nice tux.
#164 to #161 - joeyisamadman
Reply +9
(09/05/2012) [-]
YES.
#174 to #164 - darthblam
Reply +2
(09/05/2012) [-]
That played out rather well didn't it?
I was just looking for a random reaction picture and then I happened across this random gif that I haven't used in months. Perfect situation too.
#64 - hadtomakeanewname
Reply +16
(09/05/2012) [-]
#68 - syis
Reply +15
(09/05/2012) [-]
Considering the fact that zombies can't use any sort of weapon, I guess the best way to get prepared to a zombie outbreak is to go to a medieval faire and to suit up.
#78 to #68 - zzzbrabbitzzz
Reply 0
(09/05/2012) [-]
That's pretty ******* smart
#79 to #68 - anon
Reply 0
(09/05/2012) [-]
From the zombie survival guide:

In truth, standard medieval armor is far from invulnerable. The leather or metal joints that hold its many pieces
together can be tom apart by an individual's persistent hands, to say
nothing of a mob. Even intact, steel suits are heavy, cumbersome, suffocating,
dehydrating, and extremely noisy. If possible, study and wear
a real suit of armor and practice fighting in it against even one (mock)
attacker. You will find the experience uncomfortable at best, excmciating
at worst. Now imagine five, ten, fifty attackers, all converging on
your position, grabbing at the plates, pulling them in all directions.

Not to mention the armor used at most of those fairs is not battle-capable.
#423 to #79 - themarineelite
0
has deleted their comment [-]
#347 to #79 - finni
Reply 0
(09/05/2012) [-]
If you read it, you'll also know that you'll probably not run into any zombies if you stay on the right way and avoid the wrong places. Your real threat would be getting food and water. Also, as any guy who watches the Walking Dead knows, the biggest threat are the humans, not the zombies.
#93 to #79 - anon
Reply 0
(09/05/2012) [-]
Max Brooks ftw
#80 to #79 - anon
Reply 0
(09/05/2012) [-]
* excruciating
#102 to #79 - williamzanziger
Reply -2
(09/05/2012) [-]
thats false though, the book was written as a joke and people take it too seriously. the only downside to wearing a coat of arms is that its hot as hell and hard to move, but otherwise it IS the best plan.
#110 to #102 - anussuckle
Reply 0
(09/05/2012) [-]
Except he does have a point. It would be very heavy and Suffocating. Plus, You wouldn't be able to fend yourself very well from 15+ zombies. Also Carrying supplies such as food and water would also be a problem and if you're thinking about having a backpack, That would be very hard. Your movement is constricted. Also, Another great point is that, They CAN tear off the armour because it wouldn't last forever and it probably isn't battle ready.
#124 to #110 - williamzanziger
Reply 0
(09/05/2012) [-]
I'm not saying walk into a horde dude, obviously you have self preservation in mind before hand which is why you would only use it when you felt it was necessary.
#128 to #124 - anussuckle
Reply 0
(09/05/2012) [-]
Well, yeah, Obviously, But it's loud and if we go off that they can recognize sound they would come absolutely sprinting for you. I'm just saying wearing something lighter like normal clothing may actually be better than, heavy, Clunky and encumbersome armour. Or go for something like bike clothing like leather. That way you can run away faster and carry more stuff.
#129 to #128 - williamzanziger
Reply 0
(09/05/2012) [-]
shark suits are not loud at all, fit very snuggly so theres no chance of getting snagged, all you have to worry about from that point on is your head.
#87 to #68 - paranoidmuffin
Reply +1
(09/05/2012) [-]
i'd wear a full body chainmail suit. even sharks cant get through that ****
#107 to #68 - dragginbref ONLINE
Reply +1
(09/05/2012) [-]
That's cute
#62 - jacksterlad
Reply +9
(09/05/2012) [-]
knowing my luck id get chased by zombie Usain Bolt
knowing my luck id get chased by zombie Usain Bolt
#72 to #62 - YourLordAndMaster
Reply +13
(09/05/2012) [-]
How would the zombies catch Usain Bolt?
#74 to #72 - jacksterlad
Reply +8
(09/05/2012) [-]
he'd be the first person to contract the disease obviously
he'd be the first person to contract the disease obviously
#215 - thatsmrnoob
Reply +1
(09/05/2012) [-]
#228 to #215 - derak
Reply -2
(09/05/2012) [-]
**derak rolled a random image posted in comment #795886 at FJ Pony Thread 14 **
#226 to #215 - captainbh
Reply -1
(09/05/2012) [-]
**captainbh rolled a random image posted in comment #35 at Discord **
#231 to #226 - discord
Reply 0
(09/05/2012) [-]
You will be zombie food.
#234 to #231 - captainbh
Reply -1
(09/05/2012) [-]
No, i can use that.
#285 to #215 - satyrn
Reply -1
(09/05/2012) [-]
**satyrn rolled a random image posted in comment #78 at Holy Schnikes! **
Inb4 something completely un-weaponisable
#286 to #285 - satyrn
Reply +1
(09/05/2012) [-]
I'mma beat a zombie with a small child.
Legit as ****.
#232 to #215 - bronybox
Reply 0
(09/05/2012) [-]
**bronybox rolled a random image posted in comment #180 at Apple's Legal Team **
#255 to #215 - salsawin
Reply 0
(09/05/2012) [-]
**salsawin rolled a random image posted in comment #404038 at MLP Friendly Board **

Anime board may be my only hope here.
#260 to #215 - dagramcraka ONLINE
Reply 0
(09/05/2012) [-]
**dagramcraka rolled a random image posted in comment #59635 at Slice of Life thread II **
**dagramcraka rolled a random image posted in comment #59635 at Slice of Life thread II **
#262 to #260 - dagramcraka ONLINE
Reply 0
(09/05/2012) [-]
some animted character as my weapon.... i am not ok with this.
some animted character as my weapon.... i am not ok with this.
#268 to #215 - xtremedeath
Reply 0
(09/05/2012) [-]
**xtremedeath rolled a random image posted in comment #41057 at Social Board ** well... Im ******
#270 to #215 - sandwitchman **User deleted account**
+1
has deleted their comment [-]
#326 to #215 - drmrniceguy
Reply +1
(09/05/2012) [-]
**drmrniceguy rolled a random image posted in comment #326734 at MLP Friendly Board **
#328 to #326 - drmrniceguy
Reply +1
(09/05/2012) [-]
***********.gif
#236 to #215 - firecrotchq
Reply +2
(09/05/2012) [-]
**firecrotchq rolled a random image posted in comment #2 at doxtr **
#258 to #215 - twhanlove
Reply +2
(09/05/2012) [-]
**twhanlove rolled a random image posted in comment #34 at Favourite part of the Bible? **
#259 to #215 - andyshandy
Reply +2
(09/05/2012) [-]
**andyshandy rolled a random image posted in comment #170829 at Anime & Manga ** Here we go.
#252 to #215 - thisotherdude
Reply +4
(09/05/2012) [-]
**thisotherdude rolled a random image posted in comment #25 at tale of a hero ** chances are it won't even be a weapon
#253 to #215 - djequalizee
Reply +5
(09/05/2012) [-]
**djequalizee rolled a random image posted in comment #327 at Titty sprinkles **
#246 to #215 - arkanios
Reply +8
(09/05/2012) [-]
**arkanios rolled a random image posted in comment #984121 at FJ Pony Thread 14 **
**arkanios rolled a random image posted in comment #984121 at FJ Pony Thread 14 **
#271 to #215 - thanksgivingturkey
0
has deleted their comment [-]
#249 to #215 - dikslapping
Reply +1
(09/05/2012) [-]
**dikslapping rolled a random image posted in comment #443415 at MLP Friendly Board **
#264 to #215 - satexas
Reply 0
(09/05/2012) [-]
**satexas rolled a random image posted in comment #95 at man **
#298 to #215 - lavitts
Reply 0
(09/05/2012) [-]
**lavitts rolled user pkmntrnrred **
You're my new weapon, now transform!
#303 to #298 - pkmntrnrred
Reply +1
(09/05/2012) [-]
uh
i guess
a pokeball?
#312 to #303 - lavitts
Reply +1
(09/05/2012) [-]
Sweet! We'll use Charizard to roast the horde!
#315 to #312 - pkmntrnrred
Reply +1
(09/05/2012) [-]
Charizard is loafing around
Charizard is loafing around
#320 to #315 - lavitts
Reply +1
(09/05/2012) [-]
HAHA! I regret nothi-OW MY EAR!
#329 to #320 - pkmntrnrred
Reply +1
(09/05/2012) [-]
Charizard used ************************
Charizard used ************************
#256 to #215 - wheresthefudge
Reply 0
(09/05/2012) [-]
**wheresthefudge rolled a random image posted in comment #185764 at Anime & Manga **

Come on! Shotgun!
#291 to #215 - redheadedgamer
Reply 0
(09/05/2012) [-]
**redheadedgamer rolled a random image posted in comment #692 at Bill Nye motherfucker **
#292 to #291 - redheadedgamer
Reply 0
(09/05/2012) [-]
**** yeah my weapon is science!
#245 to #215 - iwantfun
Reply 0
(09/05/2012) [-]
**iwantfun rolled a random image posted in comment #35 at look at the description ** am i screwed or what?
#284 to #215 - rellergert
0
has deleted their comment [-]
#230 to #215 - tormenttheweak
Reply 0
(09/05/2012) [-]
**tormenttheweak rolled a random image posted in comment #175 at Fuck your cups **
#279 to #215 - wowflame
Reply 0
(09/05/2012) [-]
**wowflame rolled a random image posted in comment #96 at i just wish i was born in the 80s **
#240 to #215 - captaindakir
Reply -1
(09/05/2012) [-]
**captaindakir rolled a random image posted in comment #793846 at FJ Pony Thread 14 **
#278 to #215 - lordofthenash
Reply 0
(09/05/2012) [-]
**lordofthenash rolled a random image posted in comment #95 at Moe ** WHAT NOW?
**lordofthenash rolled a random image posted in comment #95 at Moe ** WHAT NOW?
#229 to #215 - bronybox
Reply -2
(09/05/2012) [-]
**bronybox rolled a random image posted in comment #130 at When I'm finally home **
#275 to #215 - rageeffer
Reply 0
(09/05/2012) [-]
**rageeffer rolled a random image posted in comment #41 at yes. **
#220 to #215 - multednipple
Reply -2
(09/05/2012) [-]
**multednipple rolled a random image posted in comment #237 at Christians:1 **
#272 to #215 - rodvich
Reply 0
(09/05/2012) [-]
**rodvich rolled a random image posted in comment #10 at 'murrica **
#238 to #215 - theflamingotrigger
Reply +12
(09/05/2012) [-]
**theflamingotrigger rolled a random image posted in comment #889654 at FJ Pony Thread 14 **
#242 to #238 - captaindakir
Reply +2
(09/05/2012) [-]
Holy ****, someone actually rolled a weapon.
#239 to #238 - theflamingotrigger
Reply 0
(09/05/2012) [-]
I am okay with is
#58 - spektre
Reply +12
(09/05/2012) [-]
Well yeah, hide in plain sight, don't draw all their attention to you. Duh
#73 to #58 - tommygunntyler
Reply +3
(09/05/2012) [-]
i love you
#8 - swampert
Reply +11
(09/04/2012) [-]
Either situation looks pretty ******, guy on top of car is super ******
#11 - iRetaliate
Reply +8
(09/04/2012) [-]
Protip: There would never be a zombie apocalypse unless the initial infection was widespread.

Sure, some people would get bitten, but as soon as it became NEWS that there were zombies, people would just be going out in huge groups to kill all the zombies.

It would also have to start globally, because zombies cannot operate boats. FACT.
#38 to #11 - anon
Reply 0
(09/04/2012) [-]
That's the problem, there would be no new about zombies. They would try to keep everyone calm. No one would know about zombies until they saw it with their own eyes.
#40 to #38 - iRetaliate
Reply -2
(09/04/2012) [-]
That's not how that works...

The news doesn't hide things like THAT, they WANT the public to know, because it's good for ratings.
#45 to #11 - anon
Reply 0
(09/04/2012) [-]
then they can just use planes.
#54 to #45 - iRetaliate
Reply +1
(09/04/2012) [-]
#66 to #11 - BIGSEXYISBACKAGAIN
Reply 0
(09/05/2012) [-]
What if you got bit, then symptoms didn't appear for a month, but within that month, it was highly contagious.
#20 to #11 - ashleysmith
Reply +1
(09/04/2012) [-]
What if the virus is airborne, such as in I AM LEGEND, where some people are affected through the airborne virus and some only through bites.. then it would spread globally, just saiyan.
#23 to #20 - iRetaliate
Reply 0
(09/04/2012) [-]
"...initial infection was widespread"

The initial infection being "the external source that caused the infection".
#149 to #11 - hauntzor
Reply +1
(09/05/2012) [-]
This ******* guy.


In today's society and in popular culture, practically everyone younger than 30 knows what to do if one was even hinted. It would be over in a matter of days... weeks, tops.

Not to mention most countries have a thing called "military," and that's sort of their job, you know, to protect the public.

inb4 some 13-year-old yells to me why I'm wrong because he read a survival guide about zombies once (because you know, the author of the Zombie Survival Guide has totally run into zombies before)

pic unrelated
#155 to #149 - iRetaliate
Reply 0
(09/05/2012) [-]
Are...

Are you disagreeing with me...? That first part kind of threw that out there...
#159 to #155 - hauntzor
Reply 0
(09/05/2012) [-]
I wasn't even disagreeing with you. I thought I was adding on to your statement and backing up why you were correct.

Now I'm confused as ****.
#162 to #159 - iRetaliate
Reply 0
(09/05/2012) [-]
Your comment agreed with me, but usually "This ******* guy" targets somebody who you disagree with.
#165 to #162 - hauntzor
Reply 0
(09/05/2012) [-]
Oh, well I usually use it as a "this ******* guy knows his ****" kind of way. Sorry for the confusion.
#13 to #11 - lefish
Reply +2
(09/04/2012) [-]
It doesn't matter that they can't operate boats, they can walk across the ocean floor. FACT. (source, WWZ and the Zombie Survival Guide)
#60 to #13 - aBlindMoron
Reply +5
(09/05/2012) [-]
>reads fiction
>"it's fact"
#85 to #60 - lefish
Reply 0
(09/05/2012) [-]
Said fact to reference dwight schrute because 11 said fact to do the same
#16 to #13 - iRetaliate
Reply +2
(09/04/2012) [-]
Also, the Zombie Survival Guide is inaccurate. I should know, I have a doctorate in Astrophysics and I was in Vietnam.
#84 to #13 - thesnarfalarker
Reply +1
(09/05/2012) [-]
Theyd get crushed by the pressure
#42 to #13 - jbchockey
Reply 0
(09/04/2012) [-]
Really they wouldnt get squished because of Ocean Pressure or decompose by the time they hit land?
#51 to #42 - lefish
Reply 0
(09/04/2012) [-]
pressure is an excellent point, I never thought of that. As for decomposition, most zombie mythos's state that living animals/bacteria aren't interesting in zombie flesh, either because zombies are created by some form of parasite or disease which would destroy rather than feed parasitic organisms, or because of magic. Pressure is interesting though.
#15 to #13 - iRetaliate
Reply 0
(09/04/2012) [-]
Yes, but then they're even easier to detect... If you see somebody walk up onto shore out of nowhere, you know they're a zombie.
#50 to #15 - lefish
Reply 0
(09/04/2012) [-]
detection is only a significant issue in the early stages of the zombipocalypse.