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Tard stories

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Submitted: 08/02/2012
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#3 - trandhal (08/02/2012) [-]
> Stare up at the clouds
> It is finished
> No matter what happends, no matter how old I get
> I'll never forget...
> Fats McGee. And his Retard Three

The ending was just too beautiful. Manly tears were shed
#5 - iskandersa (08/02/2012) [-]
i ******* lost it at the thunderdome
#56 - puccypirateisback **User deleted account** (08/03/2012) [-]
this is how I imagine Fats
this is how I imagine Fats
User avatar #37 - roflstorm (08/03/2012) [-]
folks, thisll sound "of ******* course" like but, i have a tard story of my own.
its the story of Dallas.
>6rd grade
>be new to school
>sitting on office waiting for some ****
>random megatard walks in office, half naked. (no shoes or pants)
>dude couldve been at least 300 lbs
>casually sits down next to me
>"mi nem ith dals"
>sit there blankly
>grabs my arm and reefs me to ground
>sudden onslaught of ******* brock lesnar strength hammer fists
>tard wrangler busts in with back up
>megatard sounds the tard alarm with a bomb siren type of scream
>stampede of tards of all sizes storms office like the ******* allies storming normandy
>its the wranglers VS the tards
User avatar #39 to #37 - roflstorm (08/03/2012) [-]
Dallas and the great tard war pt I
>Dallas climbs on table and raises fist
>Tards at the ready
>you could here a pin drop
>sudden eye of the ******* tiger glare bombards the wranglers
>a brigade of a dozen battletards drops on all fours
> ******* beast modes
>im watching this glorious sight from behind a desk
>the front line of battletards lunges out at the wranglers in complete unison
>everything that wasnt bolted down was used as weapons
>staplers, pan holders, books, pencils cases, everything
>the wranglers never had a chance
User avatar #43 to #39 - roflstorm (08/03/2012) [-]
Dallas and the great tard war pt II
>many screams rung out of the tards mouths
>some high pitch bat cries signaling some kind of special attack from the stumptards
>others were like ******* bass drops from hell. these i shortly learned meant they were signaling their leader that a life was claimed.
>meanwhile Dallas is coordinating every single battletard with a variety of grunts, screams, roars and oddly enough, belches.
>then one high pitches scream in particular shutters the battlefield
>the weakest tard was taken out.
> ********* .jpg
>Dallas flips absolute ****
>jumps off the table and in some kind of slow motion, does this swan dive
>battletard leader Dallas lands on wrangler
>the end is nigh
>cont'd some more
User avatar #44 to #43 - roflstorm (08/03/2012) [-]
Dallas and the great tard war pt III
>the wranglers get a hold of one of the tards and disarms him
>2 battletards fire a pencil case artillery shell into the field
>a barrage of multiple dozen pencil crayons and their broken let scatter shots pelt the wranglers.
>its no use
>some of the wranglers duck behind desks and strategize
>the head wrangler calls out "XJ49 DELTA"
>immediate battle change
>wranglers suddenly immune to pencil case artillery fire
>Dallas sees this and gargles illegible words
>3 minitards run at tables and jump
>he called in a ******* air strike
>minitards hit their mark
cont'd again
User avatar #47 to #44 - roflstorm (08/03/2012) [-]
Dallas and the great war finale
>wranglers never saw it coming
>head wrangler witnesses several of his men give their lives
>calls out the retreat
>several wranglers retreat into the vans
>the war is over
>the tards have won
>but at what cost?
#64 to #47 - phantomseeker (08/03/2012) [-]
#60 to #47 - trandhal (08/03/2012) [-]
Oh god wat?

It's glorious... but still so much Wat?
User avatar #45 to #44 - tables (08/03/2012) [-]
what happened to me?
#46 to #44 - roflstorm has deleted their comment [-]
#17 - thesmarterest (08/03/2012) [-]
I like Neal more. I think it has enough plot that they could make a movie of it.
(Be warned, the pic is very large.)
User avatar #73 to #17 - littlemsfunnyjunk (08/03/2012) [-]
i ******* love these!!
User avatar #22 to #17 - notsofunnycomedy (08/03/2012) [-]
holy **** that was a long read
#24 to #17 - jmbraze **User deleted account** has deleted their comment [-]
#25 to #24 - thesmarterest (08/03/2012) [-]
That's all I have.
#61 - phantomseeker (08/03/2012) [-]
A tale that shall be passed on down through the ages.   
Literally. I'm going to make a temple in every MC server I go in, and write this down in a book at the heart of every temple.
A tale that shall be passed on down through the ages.

Literally. I'm going to make a temple in every MC server I go in, and write this down in a book at the heart of every temple.
User avatar #9 - verticalvampire (08/02/2012) [-]
this should be a movie
User avatar #10 to #9 - zzforrest (08/02/2012) [-]
And fat McGee should be forced to attend.
User avatar #12 to #10 - verticalvampire (08/03/2012) [-]
it shall be called "FAT McGEE AND THE TARD 3"
starring Nicholas Cage as teacher
costarring - John Travolta as fat mcgee
User avatar #13 to #12 - zzforrest (08/03/2012) [-]
Holy **** let this happen.
User avatar #14 to #13 - verticalvampire (08/03/2012) [-]
call twisted pictures
User avatar #1 - themrawesome (08/02/2012) [-]
OK, first comment on undoubtedly front page material.
I have to play this cool, to get massive thumbs.
Here goes.....
...... **** !
User avatar #7 to #1 - tropius (08/02/2012) [-]
Too bad this is a repost.
#19 to #7 - jzaned (08/03/2012) [-]
Too bad I don't care.
#8 to #7 - noobiereaper ONLINE (08/02/2012) [-]
which ofc means itll get to frontpage
#36 - Visual (08/03/2012) [-]
That's a lifelong achievement to brag for generations,

That's a lifelong achievement to brag for generations,
User avatar #49 - lederhosen (08/03/2012) [-]
My only tard story
>Be about 15, at friend's birthday party which is held at her stepdad's house
>Stepdad has a tard son
>Stepdad also has huge ass pool in the backyard, which we were about to get in
>Friend's brother is standing on the side of the pool, talking to someone
>Bad idea
>Tard is standing around and sees the brother
> ******* tard speed, grabs him and makes gurgling noises
>The brother accepts his fate and is plunged into the pool with all his clothes on
>He's reduced to tears as hes dragged out of the pool by the stepdad
> ******* everyone Lol'd
#31 - RonsteR ONLINE (08/03/2012) [-]
that was definitely worth the read, good job sir
#23 - toolazytocare (08/03/2012) [-]
******* .

This is the reason why I love people's sense of humor. You, sir, are the reason why patience is a ******* virtue.
Well. ******* . Done.
#67 - jettaelas (08/03/2012) [-]
ho.ly. 			****		.   
			******		 intense
ho.ly. **** .

****** intense
#55 - jonluw (08/03/2012) [-]
Comment Picture
#20 - anon (08/03/2012) [-]
give this man a damn medal
#2 - anon (08/02/2012) [-]
took me a while to read, but totally worth it, thanks OP
#65 - squishypyro (08/03/2012) [-]
That. Was glorious.
That. Was glorious.
#54 - anon (08/03/2012) [-]
good job
good job
#52 - WootBoot ONLINE (08/03/2012) [-]
#16 - anon (08/03/2012) [-]
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