From the depths of /b/. was browsing /b/ when I saw this. FIT‘ Bad first impressions t: Went to girlfriend' s hearse t: Firsttime meeting parents t: Pull inn: d i dont need em
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From the depths of /b/

was browsing /b/ when I saw this

FIT‘ Bad first impressions
t: Went to girlfriend' s hearse
t: Firsttime meeting parents
t: Pull inn: driveway
I know she has a cat and a dog
s Rememberd have my laser painter
excellent. ping
s Think I' m gonna make everybodie' s day by playing with the animals
a All shall tel
Ge inside
r Hi, Hells, My name is Dem, I' m 19, etc.
Dog on couch
r Cat walks We mom
Shine laser pointer an fizzor
p Cat Leaps far it
p Dog leaps for it
p Dag attacks cat for whatever the **** reason
s Cat died
r Dog has heart attack
Dog died
MFW I Miles these people' s beloved pets within five minutes at meeting them
emit?
********
Yandre pretty much my hem right now.
...
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Comments(122):

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User avatar #65 - ofwgktawolf (07/28/2012) [+] (2 replies)
Faggot walks into house
He shines a red light
Wtf is this ****
I think its a enemy so i attack it
Cat attacks it too
"I challenge you to agni kai cat"
I win
Cat dies
I get too happy
Heart attack
I died
I'm Dog
#92 - letrollface (07/28/2012) [+] (2 replies)
#27 - thekinganon (07/28/2012) [+] (1 reply)
**thekinganon rolled a random image posted in comment #99 at Epic Moonwalk FAIL ** your girlfriends face when
User avatar #47 to #27 - foreveralonememe (07/28/2012) [-]
She might want to get that checked out.
+8
#115 - jeminuz **User deleted account** has deleted their comment [-]
#76 - imusingdaforce (07/28/2012) [+] (4 replies)
this is quite sad so here's a par of rather fine pair of boobs to get your mind off of things.
this is quite sad so here's a par of rather fine pair of boobs to get your mind off of things.
-11
#58 - wafflesauce Comment deleted by baconface [+] (2 replies)
User avatar #70 to #58 - mitchellking (07/28/2012) [-]
You accidently spelling.
#55 - sirawesomedude (07/28/2012) [+] (7 replies)
#59 to #57 - sirawesomedude (07/28/2012) [-]
well i don't like to brag but yeah i'm fawken awesome
+8
#4 - lolzinyourmouth **User deleted account** has deleted their comment [-]
#88 - anonymous (07/28/2012) [+] (1 reply)
My reaction to this.
#101 to #88 - theugandanhero (07/28/2012) [-]
My reaction to that
User avatar #67 - ryantheatheist (07/28/2012) [-]
just play it off like "HAHAHA! MY WORK HERE IS DONE!"
#50 - anonymous (07/28/2012) [+] (5 replies)
>Me in kitchen, chopping up vegetables for dinner
>Dog walks in
>He gets really excitable when he's just woken up from a nap
>He starts shaking around
>Little bastard farts
>So loud I stop and burst out in a laughing fit
>Drop knife on my big toe
>Dog just stood there and watched as the blood poured out
>Limp to car
>Try to drive to hospital, painful as **** trying to put the pedal to the metal
>Go straight to the emergency ward
>Giant ass line
>I pass out from lack of blood and shock
>Woke up on a hospital bed with bandages over my severed toe
>They weren't able to re-attatch it
>Get so angry at my dog
>Never been in such a blind rage before
>Go home
>Dropkick dog into the fridge

MFW
User avatar #78 to #64 - rangerofthesea (07/28/2012) [-]
there is a major artery that goes into the fingers and toes of the left side of your body, due to this the body will bleed out faster fro left side cuts...so in turn the blood couldnt clot without constant pressure on the wound...which from the sound of it...he didnt use...therefore he probably "bled out" before anything could be done about it...because imaging lopping a toe off...then trying to rush to a hospital...thats easily a 10 minute drive...and a cut of an artery doesnt slow like anywhere else...it just keeps on chuggin out blood...and when the heart is depressurized "aka bloodloss of any degree" you lose conciousness to slow the heart and balance out the body so that the heart has an easier time of pumping blood...

themoreyouknow.jpg

im a ******* dictionary sometimes...
#22 - electromuffin (07/28/2012) [-]
Comment Picture
#131 - hrodebert (07/28/2012) [-]
good job
good job
#123 - Epicgetguy (07/28/2012) [-]
I was just in a thread about the Olympics that turned into ******* pillows and mattresses.
#8 - aBlindMoron (07/28/2012) [+] (1 reply)
**aBlindMoron rolls 03**
#113 - voltkills (07/28/2012) [-]
Comment Picture
User avatar #41 - comexx (07/28/2012) [+] (1 reply)
You know that moment when you laugh so hard that no noise comes out and you just sit there clapping your hands like a retarded seal?
User avatar #94 to #41 - gmarrox (07/28/2012) [-]
Everyone on Facebook knows that moment, and damn near half of funnyjunk has that moment in picture form.
User avatar #23 - dogoxd (07/28/2012) [-]
the depths? It was on /b/'s front page for like a whole day
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