Best Comebacks In History. One word, two word, red word, blue word.. SDMB DE THE BEST ll HISTERY DAMN VS. SM! RANDEH LADY AT A WHITE MUSE DINNER Woman: MMW, id  no
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Best Comebacks In History

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Best Comebacks In History. One word, two word, red word, blue word.. SDMB DE THE BEST ll HISTERY DAMN VS. SM! RANDEH LADY AT A WHITE MUSE DINNER Woman: MMW, id

One word, two word, red word, blue word.

Tags: no
SDMB DE THE BEST
ll HISTERY
DAMN VS. SM! RANDEH LADY AT A
WHITE MUSE DINNER
Woman: MMW, id C, ll t? made H bet
agaist fl t' cll" rha, soul was
impossible to ger, moire than two words
Coolidge: You lose. _
CHURCHILL VS. A MEMBER DE 'fl,'
MP: Mr. Churchill, must you fall
Churchill: Nd '' sparely voluntary.
ill;
E Churchill: , Heme
ugly But toinen' o\\' . I' ll be sober.
skill be ugly "
i' luh. lle HAZARD VS. TI ADMIN!
Admire: ; [kn Mann. I am
Can you give me ' to
ho“ In an stalled?
Mozart: A symphony 15 it my complex mm
Perhaps you should begin “ill: some simple wmm and
uvek yum way up to an symphony,
Admirer: But Hen Mosaic, you urn:
ashen you M as S wan» old,
Mozart: Yes, but I Iit: VCI an) body how
TNMMAS REED VS. HENRY MN
In (' Mra Imus in “Hill TD MD!
REVEREND EDWARD EVERETT HALE VS. THE Jha SENATE
No. I Irrhl? the Senators
and may (thm the country."
not ASKED If Hi mm: ml THE warm
SHAWN FRITZ VS. HEN“
WEI manure» Iv HTS , amour will mm m IO", A DIME .
DOROTHY PARKER VS. NEW YORKER EDITH! HARDED TESS
I' m too fucking busy, and
vice versa."
My Ill an luv an In um In I DWI ism.
DEAR WINE VS. LEWIS HARRIS
...
+4554
Views: 81439 Submitted: 05/07/2012
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[ 276 comments ]
> hey anon, wanna give your opinion?
asd
User avatar #5 - brockyboi
Reply +325 123456789123345869
(05/07/2012) [-]
Woman: If you were my husband, I would poison your drink
Churchill: If you were my wife, I would drink it.
That's my favorite comeback.
#142 to #5 - anon id: 52605ef8
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(05/07/2012) [-]
Moral of the story: Churchill is ******* badass.
#160 to #142 - grutloo
Reply +30 123456789123345869
(05/07/2012) [-]
Great copypasta of the 2. top comment.
Great copypasta of the 2. top comment.
#169 to #160 - anon id: fa253279
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(05/07/2012) [-]
Either your blind or have a terrible memory, even though 2 Churchill quotes were used that one wasn't, the guy's a dissing machine
#179 to #169 - grutloo
Reply +5 123456789123345869
(05/07/2012) [-]
what? anon just commented the same as the 2. top comment?

<-- think you forgot this
#212 to #169 - anotherjoenobody
Reply +4 123456789123345869
(05/08/2012) [-]
he said "2nd top comment"
and he was right, faggot.
#192 to #142 - crazypat
Reply +10 123456789123345869
(05/07/2012) [-]
Moral of the story: Anon is a ******* dumbass.
#13 - RandomDoofus
Reply +240 123456789123345869
(05/07/2012) [-]
Moral of the story: Churchill is ******* badass.
Moral of the story: Churchill is ******* badass.
User avatar #298 to #13 - brianhanerjr [OP]
Reply +2 123456789123345869
(05/08/2012) [-]
No, the moral of the story is... You can't trust the system!


...MAAAANNNN!!!
User avatar #12 - eikedoffen
Reply +141 123456789123345869
(05/07/2012) [-]
You can never trust quote on the internet
- Abraham Lincoln
#205 to #12 - anon id: 64391300
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(05/07/2012) [-]
this is for you
#59 to #12 - jakb
Reply +18 123456789123345869
(05/07/2012) [-]
Good sir i think you'll find the quote is actually
"The thing about quotes on the internet is that you cannot confirm their validity."
#101 to #59 - eikedoffen
Reply -35 123456789123345869
(05/07/2012) [-]
#103 to #101 - jakb
Reply +15 123456789123345869
(05/07/2012) [-]
I was correcting a quote which was obviously made up, i was being sarcastic...
#19 - madsnyeng
Reply +69 123456789123345869
(05/07/2012) [-]
Best on is between the two cricketers Glenn McGrath and Eddo Brandes

GM: Oi, Brandes, why are you so fat?
EB: because every time I sleep with your wife, she gives me a biscuit.
#111 to #19 - lessthanthreecmt
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(05/07/2012) [-]
i always thought he asked "Why are you such a fat ****?"
User avatar #190 to #19 - iisammehii
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(05/07/2012) [-]
I'm pretty sure that's just a rip from a TV series.

"That's right, every time I shag your wife she makes me a sandwich"

I could be wrong depending on when each quote was said, when was this Eddo Brandes one said?
User avatar #145 to #19 - iloverapingmen
Reply +1 123456789123345869
(05/07/2012) [-]
Does someone else on Funnyjunk watch cricket?
#193 to #145 - avyon
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(05/07/2012) [-]
i would if i knew what chanel it was aired on in america, but sadly it is not a major sport over here and somehow baseball is.
i would if i knew what chanel it was aired on in america, but sadly it is not a major sport over here and somehow baseball is.
#55 - BuddyTorre **User deleted account**
+63 123456789123345869
has deleted their comment [-]
#79 - SubjectThree
Reply +60 123456789123345869
(05/07/2012) [-]
Scene: Illinois

Drunk man: I promised myself if I ever met a man uglier than me, I should kill him.

Abraham Lincoln: Go ahead, if I really am uglier than you, then I don't want to live.
#110 - lolfire
Reply +56 123456789123345869
(05/07/2012) [-]
The best story I've heard about Churchill is when he walked into a bathroom and walked out less than a minute later.

A woman turned to him shocked and said "Mr Churchill, that was incredibly fast, you couldn't have washed your hands. We were taught always to wash our hands after using the bathroom!"

Churchill turned to the woman and said "My dear, where I'm from we were always taught not to piss on our hands."
#122 to #110 - tonyspinners
Reply +13 123456789123345869
(05/07/2012) [-]
Comment Picture

#159 - whalefister
Reply +42 123456789123345869
(05/07/2012) [-]
best quote
User avatar #197 to #159 - redwolfradolf
Reply +7 123456789123345869
(05/07/2012) [-]
That one always brings a little tear to my eye.....
#89 - hauntzor
Reply +40 123456789123345869
(05/07/2012) [-]
another Churchill quote:

Woman: If I were ever your wife, I'd poison your coffee!
Churchill: And if I were your husband, I'd drink it.
#186 - tranminh
Reply +35 123456789123345869
(05/07/2012) [-]
"Our arrows will blot out the sun."


"Then we will fight in the shade."

Before the battle of Thermopylae, Leonidas' General to a Persian messenger
User avatar #196 to #186 - redwolfradolf
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(05/07/2012) [-]
Athenians: Your tme is up, shall we come as friends or as enemies
Spartans: Neither
User avatar #200 to #186 - roninpenguin
Reply +2 123456789123345869
(05/07/2012) [-]
Just so you know who this quote is from a spartan warrior named Dienekes. There is debate over whether he actually said this but the author Herodotus accredits him with it (as well as that being the first quotation) and that is about as close as we are to come to an actual source.
User avatar #201 to #200 - rwnewton
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(05/07/2012) [-]
There is proof that this quote was actually said by Dienekes. Most of the 300 movie was fabricated for hollywood purposes but this quote was said.
User avatar #211 to #201 - roninpenguin
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(05/08/2012) [-]
Can you please provide me a link? The earliest piece that I have seen the quote is Herodotus' Histories which he put together about 20 years after the battle and while it is a VERY good source there is some speculation (or at least was when I was studying it) that some of it was added to give the Histories more "Flavor" and this may have been added by him.

And why the heck am I getting red thumbs just because I added detail to the quote?
#232 to #186 - hurati
Reply +9 123456789123345869
(05/08/2012) [-]