Jimpulse. .. -be on bus with grandma -going to the grocery store like a baus -gonna make some cookies -we come to our stop -she gets off before me -brain "You know if y
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Jimpulse

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Views: 83432
Favorited: 347
Submitted: 04/24/2012
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Comments(296):

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#6 - DmOnZ ONLINE (04/24/2012) [+] (5 replies)
-be on bus with grandma
-going to the grocery store like a baus
-gonna make some ************ ***************** cookies
-we come to our stop
-she gets off before me
-*brain* "You know if you pushed her off the bus right now, she'd probably break her hip*
-WTF BRAIN
-*brain* "do it"
-NO BRAIN
-*brain* "imagine her crying"
- **** YOU BRAIN, I SWEAR TO GOD I'M GOING TO KI...
-*grandma* "Hey dearie, are you coming?"
-"Yes granny"
-MFW my brain tried to make me break my grandmothers hip
#44 - xxxsonic fanxxx (04/24/2012) [+] (4 replies)
>Be holding baby nephew
>Brain: Hey anon, know what you should do?
>Me: Dammit brain, not again...
>Brain: Hear me out, man... Snap the baby's neck.
>Me: What the hell brain?
>Brain: What? You could totally do it.

Different Day

>Be brushing teeth
>Brain: Hey, anon...
>Me: Don't start, brain.
>Brain: It'd be awesome if you slammed your face in the mirror.
>Me: Da fuq brain?
>Brain: Bitches would love the scars...

Some time later...

>Brain: Hey, anon, you know what'd be cool?
>Me: Omg, brain, fok off.
>Brain: Anon pls.
#18 - thechosentroll (04/24/2012) [-]
This image has expired
Alternetively, you can just procrastinate. Right brain?
"Kill your family!"
Later.
User avatar #3 - xenophaigus (04/24/2012) [-]
I have the weird impulse to smash people's faces into the counter while I'm at work. WTF brain?
#123 - hauntzor (04/24/2012) [+] (1 reply)
>be me
>having conversation with male friend, my dad, basically anyone else who's a man such as myself
>receive brainwave:
>"I could grab this ****** and kiss him, straight on the mouth like a new bride while shoving my tongue straight down his throat and he couldn't do a damn thing about it"
>impulse vanishes as soon as it's conceived
>why brain, why
#112 - iamphoenix (04/24/2012) [-]
"You could throw her to the ground, rape her repeatedly and then stab her until she bleeds to death."
"Stop it brain, I'm at the nursing home."
User avatar #143 - joemand (04/24/2012) [+] (2 replies)
Has anyone else been in a car and looked at the door handle and just wanted to open it so you could fly out?

I've literally wrapped my hand around it...and nearly jerked it
#145 to #143 - joemand (04/24/2012) [-]
Oh god...my last sentence...was not intentional...
#131 - xxxsonic fanxxx (04/24/2012) [+] (3 replies)
>i be a girl   
>be me at school today   
>teacher comes up to help me   
>notice my hand is close to his crotch   
>Brain:"you could grab his dick and 						****					 him right now, he wants you, why do you think his dick is so close to your hand?"   
>mfw
>i be a girl
>be me at school today
>teacher comes up to help me
>notice my hand is close to his crotch
>Brain:"you could grab his dick and **** him right now, he wants you, why do you think his dick is so close to your hand?"
>mfw
#265 - MrFrolo (04/25/2012) [+] (4 replies)
>At school
>Hot chick bends over friend's desk
>Brain: "You know, you can **** that ass right now".
>Me:"Wtf brain... Why would I do that?"
>Brain:"Cmon, It's right there begging for your penis"
>Me:"Well...."
>Brain:"I bet she'll like it"
>Pretend to trip, fall on her, and rub hard penis against her ass.
>She thinks it was an accident.
>Jacked the **** off later.
>Best. Day. Ever.

#45 - Nails (04/24/2012) [+] (4 replies)
Usually when I walk by people who are bending over, I think "Smack her butt."

I've always wondered what would happen.
#16 - suckmyanon (04/24/2012) [+] (2 replies)
When I'm in the kitchen I think about how I could grab a knife and kill everyone and nobody would be able to defend themselves .. then I feel disgusted at myself for thinking about it.
#211 - gramfriggen (04/25/2012) [+] (1 reply)
>Sitting next to girl I like
>She's crying
>"Kiss her"
Why?
>"It'll be awesome, trust me"
>I kiss her
>I get punched
>"lol punch her"
>I actually punch her
>WTF BRAIN
>"lol"
#182 - duchessofcorn (04/25/2012) [+] (7 replies)
>In kitchen with my sister
>Slicing vegetables
> Think how easy it would be to crawl over the counter and slit her throat.
>Stare at her for a second and grasp knife harder
>Then snap out of it
>What the **** just happened?
#75 - TheCodFather (04/24/2012) [-]
related, highly.   
   
>in passenger seat of car   
>brain: Dude   
>me: Yeah?   
>brain: you could totally quickly unbuckle your dads seat belt then yank the wheel down   
>Me: NONONONORESIST BITE LIP PINCH LEG LOOK OUT WINDOW DONT DO IT   
>brain: im getting to you...one day ill win, you'll  see.
related, highly.

>in passenger seat of car
>brain: Dude
>me: Yeah?
>brain: you could totally quickly unbuckle your dads seat belt then yank the wheel down
>Me: NONONONORESIST BITE LIP PINCH LEG LOOK OUT WINDOW DONT DO IT
>brain: im getting to you...one day ill win, you'll see.
+28
#118 - jmrking **User deleted account** has deleted their comment [+] (1 reply)
#35 - codyklim (04/24/2012) [+] (3 replies)
>Be in class
>Brain: Hey Cody?
>Cody: Yeah Brain?
>It would be really cool if you would get up and stab your bitch teacher in the eye with a pencil right now
>dafuq brain
>Later on at my house
>Hey Cody, you should drown your dog in the bathtub since it keeps whining for food
>BRAIN GO **** YOURSELF
never able to get over my brain's blooslust
#274 - jremzthedragon (04/25/2012) [-]
>Be driving car
>friend in passenger seat refuses to buckle
>annoying beeping sound indicating seatbelt is not buckled keeps going off
Brain: "hey you could totally drive right into that pole over there and send him flying, that'll show him to listen to you."
Me: "That might just be crazy enough to wo- HEY NOT THIS TIME BRAIN!"
MFW I finally fall for it...
#74 - xxxsonic fanxxx (04/24/2012) [-]
>Be 12
>Runs around room throwing **** because it was fun
>Wild Dad appears
>'Cut that **** out, Tim!'
>'But it's fun Dad!'
>'You know what else is fun? Watching tv without hearing **** crash against the walls your mother made me spend 3 weeks painting because she couldn't make up her ******* mind what color she wanted your room!'
>Kick him in the nuts
>Runs
>Spend the next week at my Grandmothers house
>Come back
>Nothing's in my room but a bed, dresser and desk
>Dad sold all of my stuff
okay.jpg
#22 - xxxsonic fanxxx (04/24/2012) [-]
Me and my two friends and their dad were shooting firearms out in the grasslands, I kept thinking I could probably cap the two kids before his badass marine dad shot me down. WTF BRAIN **** YOU
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