Religion explained by 4chan. It's worth the read. D Anonymous / 50 37 No ms was a knock at my door When w answered the door w rounds well groomed, miely dressed fourchan Religion Debate
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Religion explained by 4chan

D Anonymous / 50 37 No
ms was a knock at my door When w answered the door w rounds well groomed, miely dressed couple The man spoke my
dorm "Hr! w' , and tho rs Mary"
Mary "Mrwwe" re here to W/ wte you to come kiss Hanks ass us FF
Me "Pardon mew What are you talkig ? Who' s Hank, and why would w want to kiss Hrs asstr"
dorm "Wynn kiss Hanks ass, He' ll gave you a mars, and Wynn don' t, He' ll sht out ofyou FF
Me ‘man ls tho some son mob ?'
dorm "Hank rs a billionaire Hank bu/ jthm town Hank owns ms town He can do whatever he wants, and what He wants rs to gum you a moon dollars, but He cant undre you kiss ms ass
Me "That doesn' t make any sense Why TC
Mary ‘Who are you to queston Hanks gm um you want a ? lant rd worth a Mme Ins: on the ass?"
Me 'Well maybe, ms weard, but TC
dorm ‘Then come kos Hanks ass wth us
Me "Do you kos Hanks ass often?‘
Mary "on yes, trll the urns TC
Me "And has He gaven you a dollars?'
D Anonymous ) 11 51 34 No
dorm 'Well no You don' t actually game money undre you weave town (F
Me "so why dont you Just weave down now?"
Mary 'You cant weave undre Handballs you to, or you dont game money, and He books the m out Wynn TC
Me 'Do you know anyone mo assed Hanks ass, let town, and wt the dollars?'
dorm 'My mother kissed Hanks ass Tor years She wen down last year, and I' m sure she got the money"
Me "Haven' t you talked to her sues then?'
dorm 'ofcourse not, Hank doesnt allow l TC
Me "so what makes you Dunk He' ll actually gm you the money reyou" never talked to anyone who got the money?"
Mary "wen, he goes you a Mme [mime you leave Maybe youll , maybe youll mm a small lotto, maybe your justhad hm on the street,"
Me ‘What' s that got do do Hank?’
dorm 'Hank has certan 'connections "
Me Tm sorry, but ms sounds We some son con game (C
dorm "Bud t' s a m/ lon dollars, can you really take the chance? And remember, reyou dont Fuss Hanks ass He' ll kaathe sht ofyou FF
Me 'Maybe fl could see Hank who Hm, game cedar's mm FF
Mary 'No one sees Hank no one talks to Hank (C
Me "Then crowds you his Hrs ass?"
dorm " we Just blow Hulda kss, and drunk ass we kos Karl' s ass, and he passes l on TC
D Anonymous ) 11: 53 " No
Mary 'A mend or ours He' s the one who taught us all about Hanks ass All we had to do was take mm um do droner afew Mme: FF
Me "And you Just took ms word for l when he sad there was a Hank, that Hank wanted you to lass Hrs ass, and that Hank would reward you?"
dorm "on now an has a letter he god mm Hank years ago explaing the whole draong Here' s amply, see "
Fromthe desk
1 kss Hanks ass and He' ll We you a dollars when you leave down
2 Drunk only m
3 Kaathe sheeut who you
A Eat nght
5 Hank hm
5 The moon rs made bkgreen cheese
T Everyting Hank says IS nght
3 Wash your hands adder to the bathroom
9 Dont use alcohol
10 Eat on buns, no
ll KISS Hanks ass orde' ll kaathe
Me "TM: appears to be wetten on Kai' s letterhead"
Mary "Hank ddnt have any paper
Me "I have a hunch that rfwe checked we' dand ms rs Karl' s hardening (F
dorm 'becourse, Hank maimed rd _
Me "I thought you sad no one gets to see Hank?"
Mary "Nodnod, but years ago He would (swine some people
Me "I thought you sad He was a What son racks the sht out Just because the/ re "
Mary what Hank wants, and Hanks always rm
Me "How do you heure that?'
Mary "Item T says Everting Hank says rs nght ' That' s good enough for me?"
Me "Maybe gourmand made the whole draong up"
dorm 'No way! says Hank waded ms My ' Beads: tem? says ‘Use m moderation,' Itema says ,' and lent 8 says Wash your hands undergoing to the bathroom' Everyone knows those thigs are nght, so the rest must be true doc"
D Anonymous ( Wed) 11 as " No
Me "Bud 9 says Dont use alcohol 'whch doesnt we go wth adem 2, and 6 says The moon rs made cheese,' whch spost pearn wrong"
dorm ‘There' s no contradicted between Sand 2, ajust names 2 As far as , youve never been to the moon, so you cant say Tor sure (F
Me " have thatthe moon rs made chock (F
Mary "Bud they dont know me rook came from the Earth, or from out or space, " l could Just as eassay be green cheese FF
Me Tatt nod really an expert, but w thatthe the Moon was somehow 'captured' bythe Earth has been Eaves, nod knowing mere the rook came from doesn' t make scheise FF
dorm " Just that make mistakes, but we know Hank rs always nghty'
Mary 'ofcourse we do, Item 5 says so
Me "You' Sayler Hanks always nyet because the lst says so, the lst rs nght because Hank wasted I, and we know mended rd because the wt says so That' s wow, no sayang' Hanks rm because He says He' s nyoh"'
dorm "Now you' re gammy M It' s so rewarding to see someone come around to Hanks way (F
Me "Bud on never stund What' s the deal wth '
Mary (She blushers
dorm 'Winers, m buns, no condescends we Hanks way else rs wrong FF
Me 'What rm don' t have a bun?'
dorm "No bun no meme! a bun rs wrong"
Me 'No reishi No Mustard?'
Mary (She looks sticken r
dorm (He' s shouting )‘Theve' s no need for such orang kand are wrong?'
Me "so a mg we t# some weeners chopped up m rewound be out Mme questons"
Mary (Socks m her ears kw am not ms La la la we la lala we (F
dorm ‘That' s Only some son Mew! demand would FF
D Anonymous 02/ 15/ 12( as An No
Me "It' s good? w eat rd all the dune Tr
Mary (
dorm (He catches Mary r" weew. Nd known you were one w wouldnt have wasted my was When Hank docks the I' ll be there, coining my money and lauging I' ll his Hanks ass or you, you buiness (F
Wth ms, dorm dragged Mary to them warding car, and sped or
THE END
...
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Views: 12894
Favorited: 97
Submitted: 02/15/2012
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Comments(83):

[ 83 comments ]
What do you think? Give us your opinion. Anonymous comments allowed.
#1 - awesomeqwerty (02/15/2012) [-]
4chan win. haha
#11 - trollvolta (02/16/2012) [-]
good read
User avatar #52 to #30 - alphawolffifteen (02/16/2012) [-]
Nice pic. But most of the people nowadays haven't done any of that to anyone. Therefore your argument is invalid
User avatar #54 to #52 - thegamegestapo (02/16/2012) [-]
"Study shows Atheists are more mistrusted than paedophiles"
You were saying?

Also the point is that it's ironic and hypocritical for religious people to play the oppression card.

User avatar #55 to #54 - alphawolffifteen (02/16/2012) [-]
I never played the oppression card. Where'd you get that quote? Who said it?
Nowadays if a scientist says something about evolution he is believed. Athiests are not mistrusted. Shut up.
User avatar #56 to #55 - thegamegestapo (02/16/2012) [-]
1) I know you didn't play that card I was just explaining what it was explaining.
2) It says the source at the bottom
3) www.scientificamerican.com/...
4) No I will not shut up.
#82 to #56 - phunkyzilla (02/21/2012) [-]
Oh god I wanted to say something witty but my mind is wierd lately and I haven't been able to do anything so here's a gif
Oh god I wanted to say something witty but my mind is wierd lately and I haven't been able to do anything so here's a gif
User avatar #15 - jizzexpert (02/16/2012) [-]
awesome... just awesome..
#4 - flyingwhale (02/15/2012) [-]
Comment Picture

#3 - CakemanRPG (02/15/2012) [-]
this guy does an excellent job explaining how flawed Christianity is if I do say so myself.
this guy does an excellent job explaining how flawed Christianity is if I do say so myself.
#29 - pave (02/16/2012) [-]
this is good enough for me
#7 - averagesol (02/16/2012) [-]
Them waiting for their million dollars
#48 - bakinboy (02/16/2012) [-]
i went through the whole capcha and "i agree" 			********		 to toenail clipping this. This is the first content i've toenail clippinged since that good feeling when you poop put in the capcha and i agree 			********		.    
thats how good this was.
i went through the whole capcha and "i agree" ******** to toenail clipping this. This is the first content i've toenail clippinged since that good feeling when you poop put in the capcha and i agree ******** .
thats how good this was.
User avatar #33 - pepsismash (02/16/2012) [-]
i had a conversation with someone about religion today and this describes their logic perfectly.
User avatar #24 - professorbag (02/16/2012) [-]
That was GREAT! the guy who did this deserves a medal of some sort
#8 - mrswagly (02/16/2012) [-]
is no one ever gonna defend Christianity... no oh ok
#25 - haaaxderp (02/16/2012) [-]
LOLjesus thread?
#31 to #25 - daysgoby (02/16/2012) [-]
Comment Picture

+5
#42 to #25 - robautiks **User deleted account** has deleted their comment [-]
#12 - wedal (02/16/2012) [-]
This deserves to be on the front page. You see when it comes down to complicated stuff like religion simplify it down and it probably won't make sense.
#6 - foelkera (02/15/2012) [-]
inb4 dumbasses start arguing over who's right and who's wrong.
inb4 dumbasses start arguing over who's right and who's wrong.
User avatar #13 - AnonymousWraith (02/16/2012) [-]
I'm a christian and I think I'm right. Well, not "myself", but my point of view, rather.

Another girl is an athiest and she thinks her athiesm is right.

A guy may be a ... I don't know the word for this, he believes in reincarnation or whatever. He thinks his thing is right.

So please, stop picking on other beliefs.
Not trying to live up to the christian stereotype here, but some of us are pretty cool, and I really do encourage you to go to a church to learn truth.

And, as an accurate analogy, parents put down rules for their children, some seeming bad and some seeming good. But we do break the rules sometimes, which isn't really good but is a learning experience of how you shouldn't repeat the same action.

It's all perspective. Since this post is the way it is, people will have a negative view of christians, however, if a post were to be said in a way where a christian guy did something amazing or another interesting analogy, christianity would be veiwed as cool.

And plus, since when have you ACTUALLY met a christian who ALWAYS dresses in church-y clothes, ALWAYS talks about God, like EVERY SECOND, and absolutely HATES anything that has nothing to do with him? I mean there's some that radiate with "innocence", but isn't that refreshing?

#27 to #13 - anon (02/16/2012) [-]
**** you asspussy.
User avatar #64 to #13 - derpyhoovesmuffins (02/17/2012) [-]
Buddhism, Judaism

i was a hardcore christian for the first 8 years of my life
then i hated churches but was still christian till 11
then i was atheist
i'm sorry, but i USED to go to church, but i will not go back for i see no reason to give money to faith

no it wouldn't

i have, he actually tried killing a group of 5 atheists, he killed 2 of them, that was when i was 6 fyi, so a long while ago, but still, you said have i actually...well yes i have
User avatar #65 to #64 - AnonymousWraith (02/17/2012) [-]
your church makes you give money? Well, that's just wrong, but what people usually do is freely and willingly give money to the church or to a ministry. I don't blame you for leaving a church that has a fee for cash.

.....I'm confused. Who's "he" that killed 2 athiests?
User avatar #67 to #65 - derpyhoovesmuffins (02/17/2012) [-]
it was when i was 6, so 31 years ago
User avatar #66 to #65 - derpyhoovesmuffins (02/17/2012) [-]
how was i supposed to know the name, i was 6 way back then
but he was shouting stuff saying atheist don't deserve to live
User avatar #68 to #66 - AnonymousWraith (02/17/2012) [-]
so this was just some "christian" guy? You didn't clarify it too much, so that's what I assume. If "he" was a "christian" but tried to kill a group of athiest, then he is obviously wrong and not following God's word. Did you know those people that died or something?
User avatar #69 to #68 - derpyhoovesmuffins (02/17/2012) [-]
yep
walking home the 4 miles one day
no, it was about 2 miles from where my school was
User avatar #70 to #69 - AnonymousWraith (02/17/2012) [-]
Well, that incident, although not clarified very well, shouldn't give you a reason not to be a christian. Just realize that, that guy was wrong and that is definately not something that God would tell you to do.


oh and.... you're trolling me, aren't you?


User avatar #72 to #70 - derpyhoovesmuffins (02/17/2012) [-]
btw, i respect you for your oppinion and your beliefs even if i don't agree with all of them
User avatar #74 to #72 - AnonymousWraith (02/17/2012) [-]
thankyou! I, along with other christians, respect others' too. :)
User avatar #83 to #74 - phunkyzilla (02/21/2012) [-]
>MFW you say I along with other Christians, I am a Christian and I don't respect some peoples opinions, therefore I will not be biased as 1 unit, I mean I respect atheists opinions ,but not the retarded atheists that rant all the time about how Christianity is retarded. I also don't respect the Dumb Catholics, Christians,ect that feel the need to argue with said retarded atheists.
User avatar #84 to #83 - AnonymousWraith (02/22/2012) [-]
dude.... leave it alone. It's done.

Bye.
User avatar #71 to #70 - derpyhoovesmuffins (02/17/2012) [-]
ok

nope, good job to you for making that automatic assumption though

good day to you fine user
User avatar #75 to #73 - derpyhoovesmuffins (02/17/2012) [-]
i respect you for your oppinions and beliefs, even though i don't agree with all of them

good day to you
User avatar #76 to #75 - AnonymousWraith (02/17/2012) [-]
I know, you said that.

L8r
User avatar #77 to #76 - derpyhoovesmuffins (02/17/2012) [-]
ok then :D
User avatar #78 to #77 - AnonymousWraith (02/17/2012) [-]
have a nice day!
User avatar #79 to #78 - derpyhoovesmuffins (02/17/2012) [-]
you too
User avatar #80 to #79 - AnonymousWraith (02/17/2012) [-]
not to continue with the annoying messages but, I'll pray for you, man.
Will do!
User avatar #81 to #80 - derpyhoovesmuffins (02/17/2012) [-]
ok then

User avatar #49 to #13 - ijew (02/16/2012) [-]
I'm pretty sure Buddhism or Hinduism was the word for "Reincarnation or whatever".
#14 to #13 - anon (02/16/2012) [-]
It's because of people like you that I don't want people to know I'm Christian (logged out just to say this)
User avatar #19 to #13 - fireprincess (02/16/2012) [-]
Oh and I believe Buddhism is the religion you were looking for....
#28 to #13 - insertswearword (02/16/2012) [-]
A lesson in letting people do as they wish......

From a Christian!
User avatar #60 to #28 - AnonymousWraith (02/16/2012) [-]
I never told you to go to church,
I said I ENCOURAGED you to do so.
User avatar #23 to #13 - professorbag (02/16/2012) [-]
hahaha "learn the truth" that made me chuckle a bit
#34 to #13 - italianrambo (02/16/2012) [-]
Tells people that he wants them to believe what they want   
   
Tells them to learn his truth because he's right
Tells people that he wants them to believe what they want

Tells them to learn his truth because he's right
#16 to #13 - anon (02/16/2012) [-]
'I really do encourage you to go to a church to learn truth.' truth?
#17 to #16 - anon (02/16/2012) [-]
Apparently 'truth' is selective when talking about religion
That **** wouldn't fly in a court of law
User avatar #18 to #13 - fireprincess (02/16/2012) [-]
But have you never looked at your religion and thought, maybe I'm wrong? You've never looked at another religion and though that maybe, just maybe, they have it right?

And that line, " I really do encourage you to go to a church to learn truth" is one of the reasons people don't like Christians.

It's not like this post is going to change the way people look at Christians. Even if there was one about a cool christian or whatever, it wouldn't make people go, "Oh, I was wrong. Christianity is awesome!!"
#21 to #18 - mtandy (02/16/2012) [-]
<---- Atheist, but nice to see an actual response to a religion-supporting comment rather than the auto-flame response others give.
User avatar #22 to #21 - fireprincess (02/16/2012) [-]
Why thank you. I was raised Christian so I understand the mindset of it.
User avatar #61 to #22 - AnonymousWraith (02/16/2012) [-]
Can you explain what you think the mindset is, please?
I'm not trying to pick a fight, I just wanna see your way of thinking for it.

User avatar #62 to #61 - fireprincess (02/17/2012) [-]
It's hard to explain, but I'll try.

Well there's the love/fear of God. It makes it hard to stray away from the religion for fear of eternal damnation. When you're raised with everyone telling you if you're not saved or you don't believe in God, it's hard to think that maybe it's wrong for that fear. I understand this because I've been there. Fighting with myself over whether it's right or not. Only believing because it's what's been told, not because I feel it's right. Questioning it, but always brought back by the fear of, maybe it's right and I'll go to hell.

I hope that explains my thoughts some. Sorry if it's confusing or anything. It's kind of a jumble in my head so it's hard to get out.
User avatar #63 to #62 - AnonymousWraith (02/17/2012) [-]
no, I understand.

I didn't grow up with everyone telling me I wasn't saved (because as I was growing up I admitted I did believe in Jesus, even before I really made my faith my own), but the way you said "when you're raised with everyone telling you if you're not saved" it makes me assume that you grew up christian but didn't believe? I can't say I've been in your shoes, but I do emphathize (spellcheck?) with you, sir.

Honestly, when I was younger, about middle school aged, my only reason for believing in God was soley to avoid hell, and that was in vain. Now that I am older, I believe in God because, well, I believe that He is real, and I want a relationship with Him.

Thanks for sharing, even though we don't quite see eye to eye. :)
User avatar #59 to #18 - AnonymousWraith (02/16/2012) [-]
I have, in the past. But I am now confident in my faith.
Well, I just figured all of the things I said beforehand would have made sense once I said "the truth." Don't you get it? It's what I believe is the truth, so therefore, I'm going to say it's the truth! If someone else thought otherwise, they would referr to the truth as being what they believe to be the truth!
User avatar #51 to #18 - spamalope (02/16/2012) [-]
ive thought about that stuff before and im a christian
User avatar #44 - hemming (02/16/2012) [-]
I was expecting Tree Fiddy at the end...
User avatar #53 - spamalope (02/16/2012) [-]
the bible never says that alcohol is not allowed, jesus drank wine all the time
User avatar #57 to #53 - TigerShark (02/16/2012) [-]
Did anything in this say it had anything to do with christianity? no.

your argument is invalid
User avatar #58 to #57 - spamalope (02/16/2012) [-]
well most of the arguments was christianity
#2 - anon (02/15/2012) [-]
TL;DR

#5 to #2 - anon (02/15/2012) [-]
this was actually worth it
User avatar #32 - IceViper (02/16/2012) [-]
this **** is so hypocritical. Religious stuff explaining atheism in a biased manner would get toenail clippinged down hard while this is probly going to get close to front page
User avatar #36 to #32 - pepsismash (02/16/2012) [-]
its not hypocritical. it's explaining the way religious people think. its not say athiests are right. its not saying anyone's right. it's essentially explaining faith. don't call it hypocritical. cause it's not.
User avatar #38 to #36 - IceViper (02/16/2012) [-]
yeah well its still ******** because it makes no sense how this gets 100 toenail clippings but once you say something religious it starts a *********
User avatar #39 to #38 - pepsismash (02/16/2012) [-]
but this is religious. people are missing the point.
User avatar #41 to #39 - IceViper (02/16/2012) [-]
this is against religion
User avatar #43 to #41 - pepsismash (02/16/2012) [-]
no. religion is a relative term. this is not against religion. it is questioning aspects of religion. but even athiest are so convicted athiesm has in itself become somewhat like a religion.
User avatar #45 to #43 - IceViper (02/16/2012) [-]
alright but if anybody ever posted something criticizing atheism then it would get toenail clippinged down, but suddenly this is acceptable
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