Life. Please read through :3. God created the deg and said; Sit all day by the deer d your house and bark at anyine who comes in er walks past. Fer this, I will Life
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Life. Please read through :3. God created the deg and said; Sit all day by the deer d your house and bark at anyine who comes in er walks past. Fer this, I will

Please read through :3

Tags: Life
God created the deg and said;
Sit all day by the deer d your house and bark at anyine
who comes in er walks past. Fer this, I will give ) U a life
span d twenty years.‘
The dog said: 'That' s a long time E be barking. How about
only ten years and I' ll give you back the other ten?'
So God agreed,
Then Gad created the monkey and said:
Entertain peeple, do tricks, and make them laugh. Fer this,
I' ll give you a life span,'
The monkey said: 'Monkey tricks for twenty years? That' s a
pretty leng time to perform, How abaut I give mu back ten
like the Deg did?'
And Gad agreed.
Then God created the cew and said:
fed must go inte the field with the farmer all day leng and
suffer- under the sun, have calves and give milk support
the farmer' s family. For this, I will give you a life span d
sixty years.‘
The cow said: ‘That' s kind of a taugh life you want me to
live for sixty years. How about twenty and I' ll give back
the ether farty?‘
And Gad agreed again,
Thereafter (Bed created humans and said:
Eat, sleep, play, marry and enjoy yew" life, Fer this, I' ll
give you twenty years,'
But the human said: 'only twenty years? Could mu possibly
give me my twenty, the forty the cew gave back, the ten
the mankey gave back, and the ten the deg gave back; that
makes eighty, okay?'
Cikan,' said God, "mu asked for It.'
Be that is why fer em first twenty years we eat, sleep, play
and enjoy ourselves, Fer the next forty years we slave in
the sun try support em fa midy.. Fer the next ten years we
mankey tricks to entertain the grandchildren” And for the
last ten years we sit en the frend porch and bark at
everyine.
Life has new been explained to yew
...
+3976
Views: 92046 Submitted: 02/08/2012
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39 comments displayed.
#35 - atait
Reply +84
(02/08/2012) [-]
**atait rolled a random image posted in comment #1812050 at FJ Pony Thread ** that that makes a lot of sense and im ashiest
#43 to #35 - Kibaxyru
Reply +332
(02/08/2012) [-]
NO, I AM THE ASHIEST
#103 to #43 - shiversmcduck
Reply +91
(02/08/2012) [-]
NO, I AM
#155 to #103 - herashak
Reply +72
(02/09/2012) [-]
#501 to #103 - analleakage
Reply 0
(02/09/2012) [-]
NU-UH
#500 to #103 - analleakage
0
has deleted their comment [-]
#287 to #43 - anon
Reply 0
(02/09/2012) [-]
insert ***** picture here
#59 - chrottos
Reply +132
(02/08/2012) [-]
According to this post, cows were condemned to work for farmers before man was even created + they “originally” lived 40 years longer than the farmer.
#252 to #59 - darnhyena
Reply 0
(02/09/2012) [-]
This must of happened when they made the new testament.
#69 to #59 - supermegasherman
Reply +33
(02/08/2012) [-]
#75 - eiramart
Reply +126
(02/08/2012) [-]
First I was wondering why there was no cats in this story, but now I'm glad that there's no cats.
It would be horrible to spend 10years licking my butthole, burrying my poop and playing with headless animals.
#104 to #75 - notabtard
Reply -1
(02/08/2012) [-]
No, it'd be ******* awesome. Why do you think the cat wouldn't be willing to give any of it up?
#79 to #75 - ajvams
Reply +5
(02/08/2012) [-]
lmfao...
#232 to #75 - breakfastlunch
Reply +8
(02/09/2012) [-]
Funniest thing I've read in a week.
#249 to #232 - eiramart
Reply +4
(02/09/2012) [-]
#253 to #249 - breakfastlunch
Reply +3
(02/09/2012) [-]
#53 - comradewinter
Reply +60
(02/08/2012) [-]
Too bad most humans don't make it past phase 1.
#242 to #53 - nzlallblacks
Reply +7
(02/09/2012) [-]
Phase 1! SECURE THE KEYS!
#72 to #53 - neoexdeath ONLINE
Reply +19
(02/08/2012) [-]
Only lives 40 years

Lives long enough to have two cows
#257 - imfromyoutube **User deleted account**
+42
has deleted their comment [-]
#8 - holler
Reply +30
(02/08/2012) [-]
#153 - apercent
Reply +29
(02/09/2012) [-]
lol wat
#74 - awkwardsauce
Reply +4
(02/08/2012) [-]
There's your proof. Your move atheists.
#76 to #74 - anon
Reply 0
(02/08/2012) [-]
proof of what exactly?
this prooves nothing....
#77 to #76 - awkwardsauce
Reply +5
(02/08/2012) [-]
HAHA. Congratulations on your low IQ.

I'll put your simple mind to ease though. I was joking.
#96 to #76 - rileyisawesome
Reply +3
(02/08/2012) [-]
Comment Picture

#78 to #74 - ScruffytheJanitor
Reply +13
(02/08/2012) [-]
#81 to #74 - highaspinkiepie
Reply +25
(02/08/2012) [-]
Zip boopity meep bop.
Christians :0
Atheists: 0
Cosby: zoop
#107 to #81 - nizarut
Reply +7
(02/08/2012) [-]
Comment Picture

#82 to #81 - paulpaulpaul
Reply +7
(02/08/2012) [-]
Dear Bill Cosby.
You are a god and I will die and/or kill others in your name.

ZOOP! ZAP! BOOPITY BOO!
#115 to #81 - ianmoone
Reply +3
(02/09/2012) [-]
HAHAHA! LMAO! THANK YOU! XD This made my week! I literally laughed at this for a good 5 minutes at my computer.. and usually I just have a blank face. I like funnyjunk, but I don't laugh out loud, I usually just smirk.. if even.. and this made me almost cry.. thank you! :D
#118 to #81 - Nickdowgg
Reply +2
(02/09/2012) [-]
Comment Picture

#48 - thesoulless
Reply +23
(02/08/2012) [-]
mfw we're only supposed to live 30 years.
#63 to #48 - goblingang
Reply -4
(02/08/2012) [-]
The average in the Middle Ages being around 30 isn't because people naturally died at that age, it's because the massive rate of child deaths brought the average down. Quite a few people lived til they were quite old, around 80.
#58 to #48 - onebadbassoonist
Reply 0
(02/08/2012) [-]
Where did you get 30 years from?
#62 to #58 - jaakoko
Reply +1
(02/08/2012) [-]
Lifespans of undeveloped areas, also archeological facts and ****....
#185 to #58 - thesoulless
Reply 0
(02/09/2012) [-]
becuase that's our average natural life span
#112 - skiskinator
Reply +21
(02/09/2012) [-]
re-re-re-re-re-re-re-retoast
#238 to #112 - hadokendude
Reply +2
(02/09/2012) [-]
found some