50 facts about Chuck Norris. Top 100, thanks you ever so much guys . When Alexander Bell invented the telephone he had 3 missed calls from Chuck Norris Fear of
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50 facts about Chuck Norris

Top 100, thanks you ever so much guys

When Alexander Bell invented the telephone
he had 3 missed calls from Chuck Norris
Fear of spiders is aracnaphobia, fear of tight
spaces is , fear of Chuck Norris is called Logic
Chuck Norris wen American Idol using only sign language
Chuck Norris doesn' t call the wrang number.
You answer the wrang phone.
Ghosts sit around the campfire and tell Chuck Norris stories.
Chuck Norris wen the World Series of Poker using Pokemon cards
Once the cop pulled over Chuck Norris....
the cop was lucky leave with a warning.
Chuck Norris has a grizzly bear carpet in his room.
The bear isn' t dead it is just afriad to move.
Chuck Norris ran the Boston Marathon backwards
just to see what second place looked like.
Chuck Norris doesn' t actually need to eat.
Food just uses his body for protection
There used to be a street named after Chuck Norris,
but it was changed because nobody crosses Chuck Norris and lives.
If you rate this 5 roundhouse kicks,
then Chuck Norris WILL roundhouse kick Justin Bieber' s ass.
Chuck Norris died 20 years ago,
Death just hasn' t built up the courage to tell him yet.
Chuck Norris has already been Mars;
that' s why there are no signs of life.
Did you know Chuck Norris had a role in Star Wars .... ..he was the force.
When Chuck Norris rides into the sunset,
the sun is actually running from him.
Some magicana can walk on water,
Chuck Norris can swim through land.
Charlie Sheen calls it ‘winning.
Winning calls it 'Chuck Norris'.
When Chuck Norris puts milk on Rice Krispies they keep quiet.
Chuck Norris can cut through a hot knife with butter
Chuck Norris ence urinated in a semi truck' s gas tank as a joke
that truck is new known as Optimus Prime.
Chuck Norris and Superman once fought each other on a bet.
The leser had to start wearing his underwear en the outside of his pants.
Chuck Norris grew a beard at the age of eighteen. Seconds.
Chuck Norris can make ice cubes with a microwave.
Chuck Norris can start a fire by rubbing two ice cubes together.
Chuck Norris deosn' t flush the toilet, he scares the sh* t out of it
Chuck Norris is the reasen why Waldo is hiding.
Chuck Norris doesn' t eat honey. He chews bees...
Chuck Norris counted to infinity - twice.
Time laughs at all things... Excapt Chuck Norris.
Time knows better than to laugh at Chuck Norris. And that' s why he will live forever.
Chuck Norris can kill you as many times as he wants to.
He knows CPR,
Death once had a Norris experience
If Chuck Norris were to ever run out of ammo,
his weapon would continue to fire out
of fear of disappointing Chuck Norris.
If it looks like chicken tastes like chicken
and smells like chicken and Chuck Norris says it' s beef then it' s beef.
Chuck Norris doesn' t sweat. He forces the air around him to cry
and uses it' s tears cool himself.
Chuck Norris puts the 'laughter' in "manslaughter'
Every time Chuck Norris looks into a mirror it breaks.
Even glass is not stupid enough get between Chuck Norris and Chuck Norris.
Chuck Norris once got bit by a rattle snake ...... ..
After three days of pain and agony ................ ..the rattle snake died
Chuck Norris can kill two stones with one bird.
Usually when kids go to sleep they sleep with a teddy bear...
Chuck Norris sleeps with an actual bear
Chuck Norris sleeps with a pillow under his gun.
Chuck Norris can slam a revolving door.
When the Boogeyman gees to sleep every night,
he checks his closet for Chuck Norris.
Some people break the laws of the state,
Chuck Norris breaks the laws of physics.
Chuck Norris can drown fish.
At Halloween, ghasts and minsters sit around the campfire
telling Chuck Norris stories...
Avatar' s were invented when Chuck Norris laid an uppercut to a smurf.
The only time Chuck Norris was wrang was when he thaught he made a mistake
Chuck norris can eat soup with chop sticks
Chuck Norris can finish Mario Bros without using the jump button.
...
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Views: 10884
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Submitted: 12/06/2011
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+5
#1 - zleyer **User deleted account** has deleted their comment [+] (6 replies)
User avatar #17 - luckybastard (12/07/2011) [-]
51. Chuck Norris narrated Morgan Freeman's life.
User avatar #12 - yunoknow (12/07/2011) [+] (3 replies)
why do i feel like many of these can be used as in soviet russia jokes
#13 to #12 - prewhoregermaine (12/07/2011) [-]
In Soviet Russia, Chuck Norris is still awesome
User avatar #4 - pararaptor (12/07/2011) [-]
5 and 46 are more or less the same...thumb anyway.
User avatar #3 - harsis (12/07/2011) [-]
47 is wrong

no one would be able to survive an uppercut from Chuck Norris
User avatar #7 - banjofrank (12/07/2011) [+] (1 reply)
Chuck Norris can fart the alphabet.

I made one up ages ago and I was pretty proud of it , but I never put it up so I'll leave it here destined to rot away in the comments. hope you enjoyed.
#6 - Womens Study Major (12/07/2011) [+] (1 reply)
48 is a paradox
#8 to #6 - abdullahmag (12/07/2011) [-]
no it's not
#22 - Womens Study Major (01/09/2012) [-]
#49 is definitely wrong. Asians eat soup with chopsticks, too. Lmao
User avatar #15 - luckybastard (12/07/2011) [-]
In soviet russia

chuck norris is religion.
0
#5 - patownslife has deleted their comment [-]
User avatar #2 - scroul (12/06/2011) [-]
lol i eat soup with cop sticks
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