Brandon So today I was delivering pizza on this road in the
middle of nowhere, so its deathly quiet. I pull up to the house and I go
up to the door and knock on it, and after I knack I start to feel very
gassy. The person, and elderly lady, opens the door, and takes the
pizza and starts getting my money ready (story continues]
2 hours ago - Comment - Like
sh Andy likes this.,
Brandon Meanwhile, the pressure in my bowels is
reaching critical mass. So she hands me my money and closes the
door. Iternet around and couldn' t wait any longer so Must let it
rip., Now, words, really don' t do this fart stace. My cheeks
bloomed open like a spring flower, and I let forth a mighty trump,
the likes inwhich would make gods shake in fear., Fm hanging
onto the railing for dear life, as swollen intestines forcefully
deflate, causing my ass hams to thundery usly applaud together.
The wooden porch shook and vibrated beneath me, putting any
ricer' s sub -woofer to shame. As the last of the noxious air
blasted out of me, I was relied with a wondrous sense of relief, and
audibly sighed with a high pitched orgasmic , like
Harry on the toilet in Dumb a Dumber.
Then Horned around, a proud smile beaming on my face, and
saw the elderly lady, frozen in terror at the doorway. Her hand
was outstretched with a couple dollars, apparently she forgot to
tip me. Her jaw was on the ground., She was completely
motionless minus the tears I saw welling up in her eyes. Adog
howls in the distance.
Not kn owing what else to do, lju st said, "Have a nice day!" And
skipped to my car.
2 hours ago - Like