Scientific hell. Now it all makes sense<br /> this is so awesome. thank you guys for my second front pager. by the way... DONT LOOK AT THE TAGS. HELL EXPL
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Scientific hell

Now it all makes sense<br />
this is so awesome. thank you guys for my second front pager. by the way... DONT LOOK AT THE TAGS

HELL EXPLANED BY CHEMISTRY STUDENT
The following is an actual question given on a University of Washington chemistry . The answer try one
student was so "profound" that the professor shared it with colleagues, via the Internet, which is, of course, why we
now have the pleasure of enjoying it as well :
Bonus Question: is Hell exothermic (gives off heat] or endothermic [absorbs heat)?
Most of the students wrote proofs of their beliefs using Boyle' s Law (gas cools when it expands and heats when it is
compressed] or some variant. one student, however, wrote the following:
First, we need to know how the mass of Hell is changing in time. Therefore, we need
to know the rate at which souls are moving into Hell and the rate at which they are leaving. I think that we can safely
assume that once a soul gets to Hell, it will not leave. Therefore, no souls are leaving. As for how many souls are
entering Hell, let us look at the different religions that exist in the world today. Most of these religions state that if you
are not a member of their religion, you will go to Hell. Since there is more than one of these religions and since people
do not belong to more than one religion, we can project that all souls go to Hell. With birth and death rates as they are,
we can expect the number of souls in Hell to increase exponentially.
Now, we look at the rate of change of the volume in Hell because Boyle' s Law
states that in order for the temperature and pressure in Hell to stay the same, the volume of Hell has to expand
proportionately as souls are added. This gives two possibilities:
1. If Hell is expanding at a slower rate than the rate at which souls enter Hell, and then the temperature and pressure in
Hell will increase until all Hell breaks loose!
2. If Hell is expanding at a rate faster than the increase of souls in Hell, then the temperature and pressure will drop until
Hell freezes over.
so which is it?
If we accept the postulate given to me by Teresa during my Freshman year that, ''It will be a cold day in Hell before I
sleep with you," and take into account the fact thatl slept with her last night, then number two must be true, and thus I
am sure that Hell is exothermic and has already frozen over.
The corollary of this theory is that since Hell has frozen over, it follows that it is not accepting any more souls and is
therefore, extinct .... ..leaving only Heaven, thereby proving the existence of a divine being which explains why, last
night, Teresa kept shouting "Oh my God."
...
+500
Views: 35477
Favorited: 222
Submitted: 03/07/2010
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Comments(147):

[ 147 comments ]

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User avatar #26 - pickletoe (03/07/2010) [-]
but my mom says im straight!!
#21 - UrDEAdTomE **User deleted account** (03/07/2010) [+] (1 reply)
**UrDEAdTomE rolls 756,996,987** ends in 7 next person to comment is gay
User avatar #3 - NoThisIsBlaze (03/07/2010) [-]
Wow, how could you possible think of this?

Also i wonder what his teachers reaction was...
User avatar #1 - Ariath Uchiha (03/07/2010) [+] (3 replies)
**** he must have been very high to produce this, i know i would have to be.
User avatar #2 to #1 - FuckinNorway (03/07/2010) [-]
in all honesty i was not high i was making a shot at my chemistry professor for being a douchebag and always making sex jokes. it was starting to bother me that every time i thought about sex his *********** jokes popped up in my head. ***********
User avatar #78 - funnys ONLINE (03/08/2010) [+] (2 replies)
dont look at tags......
#80 to #78 - jonagoo (03/08/2010) [-]
i never would have until you said this.
User avatar #47 - IronDragon (03/08/2010) [-]
Dean of whatever university:
"Well since you are obviously the smarter than 98.2% of the World and the fact that you managed to get with Teresa I'm giving you your diploma.

Now that you have a college education we can offer you a job. Your first assignment is to travel the World and teach everyone how to be as epic as you.

Now go do great things for humanity".
User avatar #6 - epicwincomments (03/07/2010) [-]
i hope he ****** marked it right!
User avatar #131 - redfang (03/08/2010) [-]
**redfang rolls 981,659,159**<---how many people already slept with teresa
#77 - freehomem (03/08/2010) [+] (2 replies)
C-C-C-C-C-C-C-C-COMBO Breaker

Fatality, brutality, animality
#79 to #77 - anonymous (03/08/2010) [-]
It's bestiality. Idiot.
User avatar #75 - TehTodd (03/08/2010) [-]
Duuuuuude .... Hell-Five! *Raises hand*
#73 - IhaveNoscopedJFK (03/08/2010) [-]
They're idiots, the real Hell is Justin Beiber's YouTube channel >:\

Ignorance!
#34 - IgaveGODaids (03/07/2010) [-]
holy **** , my mind is blown! that was truly and irrefutably epic
User avatar #32 - Redapoluza (03/07/2010) [+] (1 reply)
My mind has just been raped
#105 - anonymous (03/08/2010) [+] (4 replies)
**anonymous rolls 696,270,760** if this ends in 0 then it's a sign from God himself to start smoking...
User avatar #60 - Rat Chieftain **User deleted account** (03/08/2010) [-]
SO MUCH WIN ... but the fact that teaches are asking religious questions during a science class ... what is this world coming to ?
#59 - uniqueasalways (03/08/2010) [-]
Who else read the answer in Sheldon Cooper's voice?

This is so much win, man. I wish I had the guts and the brains to write something like that lol.
+2
#40 - finexillxjoin **User deleted account** has deleted their comment [-]
User avatar #36 - AnAverageGuy (03/07/2010) [-]
MIND=BLOWN!!!!!!!
#20 - anonymous (03/07/2010) [+] (5 replies)
Fake.

Read a variant a year ago, that stated that he didn't sleep with the girl. Th he said #1 was true.

FAKE FAKE FAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAKE.
ty.
#33 to #20 - Shermanatorb (03/07/2010) [-]
You anons will just never understand FJ. We here don't care if it's fake. If it's FUNNY, it BELONGS ON FUNNY JUNK.

If that doesn't make it crystal clear, then I don't know what will...
User avatar #7 - WarpedHT (03/07/2010) [+] (7 replies)
**WarpedHT rolls 457,610,381**
I don't understand this, if every religion says that if you aren't a member of
their religion your going to hell then not every one is going to hell as is stated above, if this state ment is true and there are lets say 100 religions then 99 percent of the people in those religions are going to hell this of course is if you count atheism as its own religion, but you also must count how many people are in each religion, lets face it the catholics got more than others and snake worshippers got lest than most, so these figures seem to be based on a number of variables that haven't been considered leading me to believe that the author who penned this work is a ****** LIAR!!!
#22 to #7 - anonymous (03/07/2010) [-]
Christianity states that if you aren't Christian, you go to hell.

Judaism stats if you aren't a judaist, you go to hell.

Since Atheism, Buddhism, and the rest aren't Christian or Judaism, since CHristian isn't Judaism, and Judaism isn't Christian, then we can conclude that all people go to hell. Because, These 2 religions say the other goes to hell. And since neither are the same, it happens.
And you, sir, fail to realize that in the CHURCH OF FOAMY, smart asses go to hell LV9. Bitch.
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