I got fired from my job as a train station announcer yesterday.
All I said was "If anyone has lost a small child, he has been found on platforms 3, 4 and 5."
I was following a young girl down a dark alley last night.
She suddenly noticed me behind her, so I said,
Dona worry, Tm not a rapist, Tm just walking home"
That‘ s what a rapist would say." she replied.
Turned out it was.
I saw a poor old lady fall unconscious in the snow today.
Well Tm assuming she was poor, she only had in her purse.
That‘ s all for today. Keep being
awesome. Feedback appreciated.