Australia. I love being aussy. These Questions were posted an an Australian Tourism Website and the answers are the actual responses by the website officials, w aussy OI
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Australia

 
Australia. I love being aussy. These Questions were posted an an Australian Tourism Website and the answers are the actual responses by the website officials, w

I love being aussy

Tags: aussy | OI
These Questions were posted an an Australian Tourism Website and the
answers are the actual responses by the website officials, who
obviously have a great sense (not ta mention a law
tolerance threshold liar cretins!)
tts Q: [mes it ever get windy in Australia? I have never seen it rain an
TN, how do the plants grow? ( UK I
tts A: We import all plants Fully grown and then just sit around watching I
tts
tts Q: Will I be able to see Kangaroos in the street? t USA )
tts A: legends how much yau' been drinking.
tts Q: 1 want to walk train Perth ta Sydney - can I Fallow the railroad
tracks? ( Sweden)
tts A: Sure, it' s only three thousand miles, take lots at water,
uss
tts Q: Are there any Aln/ Is, (cash machines) in Australia ? Can you send
me a list ofthem in Brisbane. Cairns, Townsville and Hervey Bay ?
tts A: What did your last slave die
uss
tts Q: Can you give me some information about hippo racing in
Australia ? t USA)
3* A: is the big triangle shaped continent south of lolrape.
3* is that big island in the middle if the Pacific which does
not FII Oh forget it. Sure, the hippo racing is every Tuesday night in
Kings Cross, Come naked.
tts Q: Which direction is North in Australia ? (USA)
tts A: Face south and then tum 180 degrees. Contact us when you get
here and we' ll send the rest ortho directions,
tts
3* Q: Can I bring cutlery into Australia ? t UK )
tts AN/ ? Just use your fingers like we dc...
uss
tts Q: Can you send me the Vienna Hays’ Choir schedule? t USA )
3* A: is that quaint little country bordering , which
is III Oh ferget it. Sure, the Vienna Boys Choir plays every Tuesday
night in Kings Cross, straight after the hippo races. Come naked.
tts
3* Q: Can I wear high heels in Australia? t UK )
3* A: You area British politician, right?
tts Q: Are there supermarkets in Sydney and is milk available all year
round? ( Germany )
tts A: No, we are a peaceful civilization of' vegan hunter/ gatherers,
tts Milk is illegal.
tts Q: Please send a list Mall doctors in Dispense
rattlesnake serum. ( USA I
tts A: Rattlesnakes live in which is where YOU came from,
tts All A autralian snakes are perfectly harmless, can be safely handled
and make good pets.
tts Q: 1 have a question about a Famous animal in Australia , but I target
its name. Its a kind at bear and lives in trees. (LISA)
tts A: It' s called a Drop Bear. They are so called because they drop out all
tts You can scare them o ff by spraying yourself with human urine before:
tts Q: 1 have developed a new product that is the fountain .
Can yau tell me where I can sell it in Australia ? (USA)
tts A: Anywhere significant numbers gather.
tts Q: lho you celebrate Christmas in Australia ? (France )
tts A: Only at Christmas.
tts
tts Q: Will I be able to speak English mast places I gift Ufia)
tts
tts A: Yes, but have ta learn it first
...
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Views: 108451
Favorited: 64
Submitted: 12/14/2009
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Comments(151):

[ 151 comments ]
What do you think? Give us your opinion. Anonymous comments allowed.
#128 - anon (12/14/2009) [-]
AUSTRALIA FTW
User avatar #114 - ashleymofo (12/14/2009) [-]
LOL XD "come naked"
#68 - anon (12/14/2009) [-]
I love Aussies!!!
#72 to #68 - anon (12/14/2009) [-]
same here.
Other people in the world must think alot different to what we do.
AUSSIES!
#74 to #72 - anon (12/14/2009) [-]
pussies are better
#81 to #72 - anon (12/14/2009) [-]
now i wanna be a aussie, cuz u guys never get the hate, lol
#28 - anon (12/14/2009) [-]
lol they're trying to get alot of people naked in kings cross on tuesday nights
#55 to #28 - anon (12/14/2009) [-]
(It's because they're all gay)
#70 to #55 - anon (12/14/2009) [-]
oh yeah, i forgot there are no women in the world
-_-"
#63 - anon (12/14/2009) [-]
I giggled... and then laughed hysterically.
User avatar #91 - SantaC (12/14/2009) [-]
lmao!!...gotta love Australia xD
#1 - anon (12/14/2009) [-]
being an American, I must ask for your forgiveness due to the 99.99% of us who are idiots. (as shown above)



(the last 0.01% are still idiots, just not complete idiots)
#142 to #1 - anon (12/15/2009) [-]
I would say 40% are stupid 20% are ignornant and 20% are okay. That is the case with most civilized countries, Not just america. Yes that includes Uk, Gemany, Austrialia etc...
#157 to #142 - anon (12/15/2009) [-]
what about the other 20% you left out?
User avatar #158 to #157 - Smashleigh (12/17/2009) [-]
He must be American
Him numbers no good...
#2 to #1 - anon (12/14/2009) [-]
and you can grow some balls...

the picture is hilarious though
#4 to #1 - anon (12/14/2009) [-]
Yeah, Americans make me sad. No offence, to those who show that they are intelligent, but most do.
#40 to #4 - anon (12/14/2009) [-]
Agreed.
#52 to #40 - anon (12/14/2009) [-]
stop encouraging countries to bash america. only like 20% of america is stupid, and those are the illegals.
#3 to #1 - anon (12/14/2009) [-]
lol naaa like 80% of americans are idiots, the over 20% r ok
User avatar #73 - Pedobear Sr (12/14/2009) [-]
some of those questions make me ashamed to be american. probably some rednecks. ****** rednecks.

captcha: penal.....giggity
User avatar #138 - patriotic canadian (12/14/2009) [-]
yahtzee of ZP might have had something to do with this...
#76 - anon (12/14/2009) [-]
Go Aussies!! lets do a singalong,

Australians all let us rejoice For we are young and free We've golden soil and wealth for toil, Our home is girt by sea: Our land abounds in nature's gifts Of beauty rich and rare, In history's page let every stage Advance Australia fair, In joyful strains then let us sing
Advance Australia fair.

Beneath our radiant Southern Cross, We'll toil with hearts and hands, To make this Commonwealth of ours Renowned of all the lands, For those who've come across the seas We've boundless plains to share, With courage let us all combine To advance Australia fair.
In joyful strains then let us sing,
Advance Australia faaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaair!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
#90 to #76 - anon (12/14/2009) [-]
most austrailians are thieves who descend from european settlers who stole the land of the aboriginese (not sure how thats spelled) btw the aboriginese are the oldest living civilization in history and you austrailians are pushing them further and further away from their cultures..but this is still funny as hell
#100 to #90 - anon (12/14/2009) [-]
You sir, are a ******* retard.
For a start: it's Aboriginals and Aboriginal is not relative to just Australia, it's the oldest/earliest known to any country, the indigenous Australians chose to be known as Aboriginals.
Secondly: Australians are not thieves, when there is nothing that the people these days can do anything about it.
Thirdly, how can you pretend to understand the cultural differences and conflicts between the two if you don't even know what one bloody culture is?!
Fair dinkum mate, go back to school and get yourself some ******* education.
User avatar #127 to #90 - jdzdabomb (12/14/2009) [-]
Wait, im an indigenous australian and i dont descend from thieving crims from the UK, and btw, im aboriginal who have quite a fashionable lifestyle, hence why i'm on the internet on funnyjunk :D. Btw bahaha aboriginese ROFLMAO (its aborigines and i hate being called that, i prefer aboriginals LOL). And also, btw, your argument is sorta invalid cuz aboriginal people are probs the only culture who still follow their traditional law and attend traditional ceremonies. You sir, are a bafoon. And i agree with comment #100 and also #99 LOL. Btw ROCK ON \m/
#106 to #90 - anon (12/14/2009) [-]
Are you American? Because I believe you done the same sort of thing to get your land. Besides, Australia is such a multi-cultural country. Also, I could just say, dating back. You are all decendants from murderers. Because I bet somewhere back, at least one of your ancestors killed someone.
#99 to #76 - anon (12/14/2009) [-]
dude your an idiot your skipping a few verse, the australian national antem actually has 5 verses though it is shortened to the 1 and 3 verse skipping out the second i bet you didnt know that, you disgrace all aussies
#153 to #99 - anon (12/15/2009) [-]
shutup, just shutup
#77 to #76 - anon (12/14/2009) [-]
I prefer Waltzing Matilda myself
#89 to #76 - anon (12/14/2009) [-]
im aussie, and yes, we are a part of the world! gosh, whod of thought lol. Hah, drop bears... yeah we had a couple on my farm!
#83 to #76 - anon (12/14/2009) [-]
I'm Aussie, but seriously, way to be lame. lol
#95 - anon (12/14/2009) [-]
Oh wow, lol
I'm in America and all, but damn most of the people here are dumbasses :]
#108 to #95 - anon (12/14/2009) [-]
thankyou! im not alone! dude every god damn day i see idiots everywhere asking those type of questions. im ashamed to call myself an american.
User avatar #141 - CrazyWhiteGurl (12/14/2009) [-]
Damn, I wish I was an Aussie...
#143 to #141 - anon (12/15/2009) [-]
yeah i know
#146 to #141 - anon (12/15/2009) [-]
:D I'm an Aussie
#150 to #141 - anon (12/15/2009) [-]
BITCH PLZ
#154 to #141 - anon (12/15/2009) [-]
Sucks to be you then. Be Aussie is great. lol nah every type of people group has their different advaantages and disadvantages
#23 - anon (12/14/2009) [-]
AUSSIE AUSSIE AUSSIE!
OI OI OI!
#29 to #23 - anon (12/14/2009) [-]
lol the office
User avatar #31 to #29 - Joshic (12/14/2009) [-]
what the **** ?
#36 to #31 - anon (12/14/2009) [-]
no it was my post, and i made it not stole it, but nvm
#97 - anon (12/14/2009) [-]
i am american and i am not surprised with how stupid we can be. i actually kne someone who didn't know what a koala bear was called just like in one of the questions
#155 to #97 - anon (12/15/2009) [-]
That wasn't a koala bear it was a drop bear XD
#34 - anon (12/14/2009) [-]
Haha notice how none of these questions are from Canada... Man i love being Canadian :P
#39 to #34 - anon (12/14/2009) [-]
u guys always forget ur are hat
#58 to #39 - anon (12/14/2009) [-]
Once again, I love being Canadian. If anything, we're a ******* fedora buddy. (The ones with the feathers)
#53 to #39 - anon (12/14/2009) [-]
we are hat?
#57 to #39 - anon (12/14/2009) [-]
hats mean cool right?
#54 - anon (12/14/2009) [-]
did anyone else realize theres no stupid canadians involved?
just saying :p
#80 - Chumley **User deleted account** (12/14/2009) [-]
I'm a proud American and this is ******* FUNNY. You are on FunnyJunk for goodness sake. Bring a friggin sense of humor next time if you can't laugh at this. Oh and **** CANADA, eh!
#20 - anon (12/14/2009) [-]
yeah, it's hilarious...but it's sad also. Why do only stupid Americans make contact with people from other countries? Is it to show the world that we're a country full of retards?
User avatar #33 to #20 - squishy (12/14/2009) [-]
long purple line is long
#21 to #20 - anon (12/14/2009) [-]
Naw, the mindless bastards just make us LOOK bad.
#27 to #20 - Azz (12/14/2009) [-]
THe entire country isn't dumbasses, most Americans I know are smart, and underwieght, but then again, I don't know everyone in America. I also see a lot of UK's, Sweden and France on there so why are Americans getting singled out?
#24 to #20 - anon (12/14/2009) [-]
Dickface, not all Americans are that ******* stupid. But most are D:
#56 to #24 - Deathstare **User deleted account** (12/14/2009) [-]
I think that's what he was saying................................ Dickface, teehee!
#22 to #20 - anon (12/14/2009) [-]
Because the smarter Americans are at home working on stuff to further enhance the world while the stupid ones go out and spend all thier money on vacations and make us look bad.
#151 - anon (12/15/2009) [-]
Doesn't really matter if you're Australian or not. The people who asked those questions are completely ignorant. I could say some smart ass responses too :))
#64 - anon (12/14/2009) [-]
there is going to be a lot of naked people tomarrow at the kings crossing XD!
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