couldn't resist.. . A 'alh' year old little girl was asked by another classmate, "whatis it lololl to he a Christian? The girl replied, "it' s like being a pump Religion lol
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couldn't resist.

Tags: Religion | lol
A 'alh' year old little girl was asked
by another classmate, "whatis it
lololl to he a Christian? The girl
replied, "it' s like being a pumpkin
God picks you from the patch,
brings you in, and washes all the
1' lloll off of you. Then he cuts open
the top and scoops out all of the yucky stuff.
He removes the seeds of doubt, hate, greed,
eta, and then He carves you a new smiling face
and puts His light inside of you to shine for all
the world to see."
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Jesus CHRIST '
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Submitted: 09/30/2013
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Comments(132):

[ 132 comments ]
What do you think? Give us your opinion. Anonymous comments allowed.
#2 - quoterox (09/30/2013) [-]
Damn, christians are hardcore.
Damn, christians are hardcore.
User avatar #75 to #2 - mchurtstab (10/01/2013) [-]
that mother ****** is like a shiite christian or something
#136 to #75 - darshian (10/02/2013) [-]
I think people think you're trying to say **** , rather than shiite (the islamic group)
#30 - acidreign (10/01/2013) [-]
"Then he just puts you on display and watches you rot over the next few weeks"
#57 to #30 - thebasisst (10/01/2013) [-]
Son?

Oh wait..That's impossible. I HAVE NO BALLS.
#74 to #57 - jellymadofficer (10/01/2013) [-]
it's possible. I can confirm. I was balls.
#9 - kristophskie (09/30/2013) [-]
and then you rot because you are completely empty and useless.... the pumpkin i mean...
User avatar #3 - lexausaurusrex (09/30/2013) [-]
that sounds like a pretty damn dirty ass rape ... god is a vicious rapist
User avatar #67 to #3 - ilovehitler (10/01/2013) [-]
he is godtherapist
#90 to #67 - stevvyboi (10/01/2013) [-]
Just realized the word "therapist" broken apart is "The Rapist"    
 That explains a lot
Just realized the word "therapist" broken apart is "The Rapist"
That explains a lot
#113 to #90 - hokeymon (10/01/2013) [-]
I just realize something too from alice return to madness.
User avatar #28 to #3 - haqq (10/01/2013) [-]
well that's how jesus was born
#39 - callan (10/01/2013) [-]
So THAT'S how he got those scars...
#27 - pwnnbwn (10/01/2013) [-]
Feel it within.
User avatar #26 - heroofkvatch (10/01/2013) [-]
I was a christian for 14 years.

it was nothing like that.
#32 to #26 - baditch (10/01/2013) [-]
17-year-Christian reporting in.

How good you feel about it really depends on how seriously you take it and how you interpret it. Just like everything else in life, religion is what you make of it. A lot of Christians are miserable bible-thumpers whereas many are very happy.
User avatar #33 to #32 - heroofkvatch (10/01/2013) [-]
Yea, I guess. I lost my faith when I read the bible and saw that what they were teaching wasn't what was written in the bible.

then i realized how science is ******* amazing, and my family/ church had an issue with that, so i left and now i'm just kinda eh.

I hate bible thumpers, but people who are religious because they feel it helps them i don't mind.

#35 to #26 - ricks (10/01/2013) [-]
was it worse?
User avatar #36 to #35 - heroofkvatch (10/01/2013) [-]
Well, I was scared that satan was going to get me, that demons where trying to possess me/ my mom, i was afraid of dying and going to hell, i was afraid of my friends going to hell, i was afraid of people secretly being demons/ satan trying to get me to go to hell.

I was basically always scared that god was pissed at me and waiting to punish me.

User avatar #1 - fourtwentt (09/30/2013) [-]
That's ******* brutal

inb4 god is so metal
#10 to #1 - massiveguilt (09/30/2013) [-]
You know you can not stop the unstopable.
#48 - schneidend (10/01/2013) [-]
Oh my science...
Oh my science...
#5 - aytoktonik (09/30/2013) [-]
God brings you in washes the ground in which you grew out of .Then he takes all the precious material inside that holds vitamins and kills your descendants(seeds).After that he carves your dead empty shell . And uses what used to be your womb and guts as his "light" holder.
#15 to #5 - CHODYTHEBLAKGUY (10/01/2013) [-]
that. that is what is brutal
#77 to #5 - slugnugget (10/01/2013) [-]
Christian are not actually pumpkins.
#116 - andovaredoras (10/01/2013) [-]
''Then he cuts open the top and scoops out all of the yucky stuff''   
   
From an atheist's point of view it would be read as:   
''So...you choose religion and you lose your ''brains'' (logical and rational thinking) in return? ''   
   
Not trying to offend anyone
''Then he cuts open the top and scoops out all of the yucky stuff''

From an atheist's point of view it would be read as:
''So...you choose religion and you lose your ''brains'' (logical and rational thinking) in return? ''

Not trying to offend anyone
#79 - ivoryhammer (10/01/2013) [-]
So you're saying he scoops out your brain?
#55 - theseventhalias (10/01/2013) [-]
Man, I never thought about how horrifying to would be to be a pumpkin until now...
#7 - ninjabadger (09/30/2013) [-]
Well.... that's one way to put it.
#110 - nyawgga (10/01/2013) [-]
Reminded me of this.
#121 to #110 - mehy (10/01/2013) [-]
You mean how to make a religious person ?
You mean how to make a religious person ?
#68 - granodd (10/01/2013) [-]
Oh hey I have that picture.
#105 - samoaspider ONLINE (10/01/2013) [-]
heh, so according to this, as a counter-argument   
   
Religion is like a pumpkin, you get picked up without your permission,    
then it washes off the dirt from you (other religions),    
cuts you open (religious traditions like penis snipping/baptising)    
and THEN your insides get scooped out (own ambitions, logical thinking)    
   
and then he carves you a new smiling face, like making you go to church like other fools without a reason so the whole world could see you're going heaven or something like that, based on bible beliefs and ignites the burning passion to have faith only in that one specific religion out of 26 official religions in the world.  (because obviously you have to believe the 			****		 everybody around you believes mr. sheep)
heh, so according to this, as a counter-argument

Religion is like a pumpkin, you get picked up without your permission,
then it washes off the dirt from you (other religions),
cuts you open (religious traditions like penis snipping/baptising)
and THEN your insides get scooped out (own ambitions, logical thinking)

and then he carves you a new smiling face, like making you go to church like other fools without a reason so the whole world could see you're going heaven or something like that, based on bible beliefs and ignites the burning passion to have faith only in that one specific religion out of 26 official religions in the world. (because obviously you have to believe the **** everybody around you believes mr. sheep)
#112 - anotheroneonearth ONLINE (10/01/2013) [-]
what if the pumpkin was too hard to open?
what if the pumpkin was too hard to open?
User avatar #117 to #112 - andovaredoras (10/01/2013) [-]
Then you become an atheist.
#82 - electrickwalrus ONLINE (10/01/2013) [-]
so what dos that make this guy?
#139 to #82 - anon (10/04/2013) [-]
God.
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