Home Original Content Funny Pictures Funny GIFs YouTube Funny Text Funny Movies Channels Search

hide menu

Show All Replies Show Shortcuts
Show:   Top Rated Controversial Best Lowest Rated Newest Per page:
Order:
What do you think? Give us your opinion. Anonymous comments allowed.
#132 - xxxsonic fanxxx (01/04/2013) [-]
BREAKING NEWS! NOT ONLY CAN ASIANS READ MINDS BUT MEXICANS CAN TELEPORT

Studies have shown that mexican genetics can allow them to teleport. Notice their sunburn. The number one sign of time travel.

PLEASE SPREAD THE WORD ABOUT MEXICAN CLONING AND TELEPORTATION. WE CAN NOT LET THEM GET AWAY WITH THIS
#270 to #132 - xxxsonic fanxxx (01/04/2013) [-]
so mexicans are jumpers now!?
#220 to #132 - xxxsonic fanxxx (01/04/2013) [-]
That is a sexual reference
User avatar #133 to #132 - Sandisky (01/04/2013) [-]
cool bro
#126 - hipsophobadon (01/04/2013) [-]
Every comment below me.
Every comment below me.
User avatar #125 - foxtrotalpha (01/04/2013) [-]
Not related, but is there a limit to the amount of replies a comment can get?
-2
#108 - BobVader **User deleted account** has deleted their comment [-]
User avatar #122 to #108 - myuu (01/04/2013) [-]
What the **** did you just ******* say about me, you little bitch? I'll have you know I graduated top of my class in the Navy Seals, and I've been involved in numerous secret raids on Al-Quaeda, and I have over 300 confirmed kills. I am trained in gorilla warfare and I'm the top sniper in the entire US armed forces. You are nothing to me but just another target. I will wipe you the **** out with precision the likes of which has never been seen before on this Earth, mark my ******* words. You think you can get away with saying that **** to me over the Internet? Think again, ****** . As we speak I am contacting my secret network of spies across the USA and your IP is being traced right now so you better prepare for the storm, maggot. The storm that wipes out the pathetic little thing you call your life. You're ******* dead, kid. I can be anywhere, anytime, and I can kill you in over seven hundred ways, and that's just with my bare hands. Not only am I extensively trained in unarmed combat, but I have access to the entire arsenal of the United States Marine Corps and I will use it to its full extent to wipe your miserable ass off the face of the continent, you little **** . If only you could have known what unholy retribution your little "clever" comment was about to bring down upon you, maybe you would have held your ******* tongue. But you couldn't, you didn't, and now you're paying the price, you goddamn idiot. I will **** fury all over you and you will drown in it. You're ******* dead, kiddo.
#158 to #122 - dengekisushi (01/04/2013) [-]
What the darn-diddly-doodily did you just say about me, you little witcharooney? I’ll have you know I graduated top of my class at Springfield Bible College, and I’ve been involved in numerous secret mission trips in Capital City, and I have over 300 confirmed baptisms. I am trained in the Old Testament and I’m the top converter in the entire church mission group. You are nothing to me but just another heathen. I will cast your sins out with precision the likes of which has never been seen before in heaven, mark my diddily-iddilly words. You think you can get away with saying that blasphemy to me over the internet? Think again, friendarino. As we speak I am contacting my secret network of evangelists across Springfield and your IP is being traced by God right now so you better prepare for the storm, maggorino. The storm that wipes out the diddily little thing you call your life of sin. You’re going to Church, kiddily-widdily. Jesus can be anywhere, anytime, and he can turn you to the Gospel in over infinity ways, and that’s just with his bare hands. Not only am I extensively trained in preaching to nonbelievers, but I have access to the entire dang-diddily Bible collection of the Springfield Bible College and I will use it to its full extent to wipe your sins away off the face of the continent, you diddily-doo satan-worshipper. If yonly you could have known what holy retribution your little “clever” comment was about to bring down upon you from the Heavens, maybe you would have held your darn-diddily-fundgearoo tongue. But you couldn’t, you didn’t, and now you’re clean of all your sins, you widdillo-skiddily neighborino. I will sing hymns of praise all over you and you will drown in the love of Christ. You’re farn-foodily-flank-fiddily reborn, kiddo-diddily.
#293 to #158 - myuu (01/04/2013) [-]
What in Davy Jones' locker did ye just bark at me, ye scurvy bilgerat? I'll have ye know I be the meanest cutthroat on the seven seas, and I've led numerous raids on fishing villages, and raped over 300 wenches. I be trained in hit-and-run pillaging and be the deadliest with a pistol of all the captains on the high seas. Ye be nothing to me but another source o' swag. I'll have yer guts for garters and keel haul ye like never been done before, hear me true. You think ye can hide behind your newfangled computing device? Think twice on that, scallywag. As we parley I be contacting my secret network o' pirates across the sea and yer port is being tracked right now so ye better prepare for the typhoon, weevil. The kind o' monsoon that'll wipe ye off the map. You're sharkbait, fool. I can sail anywhere, in any waters, and can kill ye in o'er seven hundred ways, and that be just with me hook and fist. Not only do I be top o' the line with a cutlass, but I have an entire pirate fleet at my beck and call and I'll damned sure use it all to wipe yer arse off o' the world, ye dog. If only ye had had the foresight to know what devilish wrath your jibe was about to incur, ye might have belayed the comment. But ye couldn't, ye didn't, and now ye'll pay the ultimate toll, you buffoon. I'll **** fury all over ye and ye'll drown in the depths o' it. You're fish food now
#116 to #108 - scarytown (01/04/2013) [-]
did you know that if you called an Eskimo an Inuit, they would be severely pissed? The people from that region are more tribes and types than just Inuit. So if you don't know what tribe they're from, then you'd call them an Eskimo, because they see that as a general term for someone who comes from that region, instead of trying to pinpoint their type of people and getting it wrong. That's like if an alien were trying to identify you and called you (if you're white) a black person, when they could have just used the general term "human."
-1
#155 to #116 - maucorn **User deleted account** has deleted their comment [-]
User avatar #175 to #155 - Nihatclodra (01/04/2013) [-]
"First Nations People" to be exact. Also "Aboriginals".
#159 to #155 - scarytown (01/04/2013) [-]
Canada can **** themselves....gently and with love.
#161 to #159 - scarytown (01/04/2013) [-]
But actually I don't know what terms Canada uses.
0
#162 to #161 - maucorn **User deleted account** has deleted their comment [-]
User avatar #113 to #108 - TheHutchie (01/04/2013) [-]
Wrong, unfortunately. They're all Eskimos, even if they don't like being called that, but only very specific groups are called Inuit.
-6
#118 to #113 - BobVader **User deleted account** has deleted their comment [-]
User avatar #119 to #118 - TheHutchie (01/04/2013) [-]
You're wrong. Don't ******** me. You also used the word "eventually" twice in one sentence. I refer you to scarytown's comment, because he's right.
-4
#120 to #119 - BobVader **User deleted account** has deleted their comment [-]
#104 - sagen (01/04/2013) [-]
**sagen rolled a random image posted in comment #2394194 at My Little Pony: Friendship Is Magic ** all hail lord Sadler..
#98 - certifiedidiot ONLINE (01/04/2013) [-]
Make a religion they said..

We won't mess it up they said..
+62
#97 - adxminisgay **User deleted account** has deleted their comment [-]
#194 to #97 - qtrfuckinghazard (01/04/2013) [-]
Because the rain was 						****					 and the fish couldn't go to school?
Because the rain was **** and the fish couldn't go to school?
0
#292 to #194 - adxminisgay **User deleted account** has deleted their comment [-]
#187 to #97 - drmrniceguy (01/04/2013) [-]
Uh...hmm.
Uh...hmm.
User avatar #171 to #97 - OminousDemon (01/04/2013) [-]
because blueberry shart melon ear

christains: -1
atheists: 0
pastafarians: 1
fruitfacevulgarians: 3
0
#173 to #171 - adxminisgay **User deleted account** has deleted their comment [-]
#140 to #97 - mrjohnmarston (01/04/2013) [-]
I....uh.....wait
I....uh.....wait
+1
#170 to #140 - adxminisgay **User deleted account** has deleted their comment [-]
#127 to #97 - lookatmyhouseofwax (01/04/2013) [-]
What...i..what..how...
#123 to #97 - jellybob (01/04/2013) [-]
you brained my damage
you brained my damage
User avatar #117 to #97 - therulethirtyfour (01/04/2013) [-]
Did you turn into Bill Cosby at the end of your post?
User avatar #106 to #97 - chonies (01/04/2013) [-]
Because you am no real super sand
#228 to #106 - xxxsonic fanxxx (01/04/2013) [-]
what do you mean, virginia?
User avatar #103 to #97 - Keoul (01/04/2013) [-]
Because banana apple mango passion fruit boogers!
It's freaking obvious dude!
User avatar #102 to #97 - gaddy (01/04/2013) [-]
because you are no pickle pear poop stain
#100 to #97 - mothafuckingbatman (01/04/2013) [-]
i..uh....wat?
User avatar #107 to #100 - crazyhindu (01/04/2013) [-]
ia what, dude im with you im am ******* shroomed out and that my mind=boom
#92 - xxxsonic fanxxx (01/04/2013) [-]
I believe that when you die, you just cease to exist, but I think that if heaven/hell does exist, which one you go to is based on moral fiber and your actions in your life, and not whether you go to church every Sunday and pray every night.
User avatar #99 to #92 - zzzanzitron (01/04/2013) [-]
^this
but i do believe in heaven and hell, those unworthy to enter either will be just left as ghosts on earth
User avatar #105 to #99 - Keoul (01/04/2013) [-]
Being a ghost seems pretty sweet, just haunting **** all day.
Also the way you phrased that is hilarious

"I'm sorry Jimmy but you're unworthy for hell, go back to earth and haunt some people, then maybe we'll accept you."
0
#110 to #105 - seelcudoom has deleted their comment [-]
User avatar #111 to #110 - Keoul (01/04/2013) [-]
Also naked red guys with horns that like to poke you with big ass forks.
But if you're into BDSM I guess hell could become your heaven!
#86 - doctoryou (01/04/2013) [-]
I think that there are different levels of hell, and people who were never taught about God would not be in the same place as a man who raped and murdered children
User avatar #77 - buttinspecter (01/04/2013) [-]
Because misery loves company.
#66 - davidavidson (01/04/2013) [-]
Just for you FJ
User avatar #65 - jokeface (01/04/2013) [-]
Where is it ever said that those who haven't heard the Gospel won't go to hell? I'd be interested to learn this.
User avatar #74 to #65 - hatersghate (01/04/2013) [-]
Dante made a special place in hell for the people who where born before christ / people who never knew about god
0
#157 to #74 - maucorn **User deleted account** has deleted their comment [-]
User avatar #82 to #74 - jokeface (01/04/2013) [-]
I think you misread my comment. I was implying that the ignorant will go to hell.
#68 to #65 - xxxsonic fanxxx (01/04/2013) [-]
um every religion book ever printed for 1st-8th grade catholic schools. Just saying... not that I would know because I had to read all of them.
User avatar #73 to #68 - jokeface (01/04/2013) [-]
This isn't even me trying to preach my faith, this is just what I read. The Bible says Christ is the only way to Salvation. That can only mean that those who haven't heard of Him are condemned to hell unless someone shows them the Gospel.
#90 to #73 - xxxsonic fanxxx (01/04/2013) [-]
what happens to a baby dieing before being baptized, they go to purgatory till someone prays for them. I would assume for Christianity its the same concept
User avatar #101 to #90 - jokeface (01/04/2013) [-]
Well it depends on which denomination of Christianity you're talking about. Not all of them believe in Purgatory. I was raised Baptist (but I don't identify as that anymore), and we never learned about Purgatory. We were just told there was earth, heaven, and hell. The Bible never mentions any other place.
#148 to #101 - xxxsonic fanxxx (01/04/2013) [-]
Im a Muslim, but our religions are very similar. And I would assume that if someone genuinely didnt know the presence of God and such, than why should they be judged to goto hell? If someone was raised in an isolated area for the most part, no religion, but wasnt a bad person, then i dont see how they can goto hell. But dont forget, only God knows...and that goes for ALL religions..
User avatar #172 to #148 - jokeface (01/04/2013) [-]
True, only God knows. But I'm just explaining what we (Christians) believe. And if we are to believe that Jesus is indeed the only way into heaven, then we have to assume this is absolute, because God is perfect and never improper. But it never says that those people will go to heaven. I know I said we don't believe in Purgatory, but there is another possibility. Our faith teaches that animals don't have an afterlife, and they don't go anywhere when they die. I guess the nothingness that atheists talk about, is what applies to animals. Perhaps (and this is just my speculation) the same applies to babies and those who haven't heard the Gospel.

I'm probably going to get even more hate for this next part, but whatever. You say what if someone was isolated from religion, but wasn't a bad person. Unfortunately, being good or bad is meaningless in this context.

"As it is written, 'There is none righteous, not even one; There is none who understands, There is none who seeks for God; All have turned aside, together they have become useless; There is none who does good, There is not even one.'"

- Romans 3:10-12

So basically, you could be the kindest, most generous, most well-behaved human being on the planet, but without Christ you burn. Even if you've never heard of Him. It's ****** , I agree, but that's the cold hard truth, as we believe. A few verses later it explains that God didn't even give us the laws as a means of getting into heaven, but rather to make us realize that we are inherently sinners:

"Now we know that whatever the law says, it says to those who are under the law, so that every mouth may be silenced and the whole world held accountable to God. Therefore no one will be declared righteous in God’s sight by the works of the law; rather, through the law we become conscious of our sin."

Romans 3:19-20
#63 - konradkurze (01/04/2013) [-]
This image has expired
Forget your false faiths, they lead you to damnation

embrace Chaos as the truth and seek unity in the pantheon of the Dark Gods

0
#145 to #63 - ftk has deleted their comment [-]
#121 to #63 - anonomoz (01/04/2013) [-]
we offer you the way of The Greater Good, free yourself from oppression, find your place among in the new society, work together to achieve the goal of The Greater Good
#243 to #121 - konradkurze (01/04/2013) [-]
This image has expired
aha but thats politics not religion
you and your Tau Communism!!!
#112 to #63 - xxxsonic fanxxx (01/04/2013) [-]
MORE BLOOD FOR THE BLOOD GODS
User avatar #76 to #63 - traveltech (01/04/2013) [-]
That symbol's oddly symmetric and orderly for a symbol of chaos...
#89 to #76 - xxxsonic fanxxx (01/04/2013) [-]
chaos was order
User avatar #81 to #76 - konradkurze (01/04/2013) [-]
Chaos is everywhere
Chaos is everything

the star is like a compass of faith
#71 to #63 - warlockrichard ONLINE (01/04/2013) [-]
Blood for the blood gods
Skulls for the skull throne
MILK FOR THE KHORNE FLAKES!
#62 - gelflingchey (01/04/2013) [-]
Comment Picture
#61 - foreman (01/04/2013) [-]
you dun ****** up now you have a call to answer.
0
#60 - chralievillanueva has deleted their comment [-]
0
#59 - chralievillanueva has deleted their comment [-]
#54 - grimmwaters ONLINE (01/04/2013) [-]
#146 to #54 - azsx (01/04/2013) [-]
from and link plz
#41 - marlkarxthethird (01/04/2013) [-]
Hi FJ. Damn dirty Jew, here. Maybe you could clarify something for me? I was lead to believe that Christians think that moral and upright non-Christians were sent to Limbo, the first level of Hell, after death. Is that a thing, or is that solely the story according to Dante?
Hi FJ. Damn dirty Jew, here. Maybe you could clarify something for me? I was lead to believe that Christians think that moral and upright non-Christians were sent to Limbo, the first level of Hell, after death. Is that a thing, or is that solely the story according to Dante?
User avatar #94 to #41 - appleboom (01/04/2013) [-]
The Inferno is fiction, and was meant to be taken as fiction.
#58 to #41 - tylosaurus ONLINE (01/04/2013) [-]
I didn't even know that was called Limbo.. I thought of this..
#53 to #41 - nocoolnamesleft (01/04/2013) [-]
It seems you've been mislead by the myth spread in education that all Christians believe what Catholics believe.
I am a Christian and my biblical studies have lead me to believe there is Heaven (where you constantly worship God) and Hell (where you are separate from God, and all of his goodness)
If people have no intention of worshiping God then they wouldn't really enjoy Heaven that much anyway...
0
#160 to #53 - maucorn **User deleted account** has deleted their comment [-]
0
#83 to #53 - kanade **User deleted account** has deleted their comment [-]
#88 to #83 - nocoolnamesleft (01/04/2013) [-]
I assume you skipped over the "... and all of his goodness" bit. If you are separate from goodness, all that is left is suffering.
0
#138 to #88 - kanade **User deleted account** has deleted their comment [-]
0
#50 to #41 - whitemager **User deleted account** has deleted their comment [-]
#49 to #41 - bigrog (01/04/2013) [-]
To add on christians dont believe in limbo, thats catholics, and only orthodox catholics if im correct
#47 to #41 - bigrog (01/04/2013) [-]
I've never read dante but im guessing it's just from that. I've never heard of any religion that believes that
User avatar #43 to #41 - heartlessrobot (01/04/2013) [-]
As an avid reader of the inferno and the bible, I believe that if there is a hell and Christian mythology is accurate, righteous pagans are trapped in limbo.
User avatar #44 to #43 - marlkarxthethird (01/04/2013) [-]
A'ight. Thank'ee doodle, friend-o.
User avatar #57 to #44 - Marker (01/04/2013) [-]
Wow, a calm and educated religious discussion on FunnyJunk. I am impressed.
#75 to #57 - xxxsonic fanxxx (01/04/2013) [-]
ive had a dream that describes levels of reality. earth is between 3-4. 7 is the holy realm and 1 is the dark realm. this dream was so intense i will never believe otherwise. at the end of the dream i was lost on the first level looking for my brother.(reallife brother) i had lost all hope and was in despair. at the end of the dream god himself kissed my forehead to let me know everythign would be ok. this scene was in my room i was watching my own body. it was so strong an emotion from this that i woke up weeping tears of joy.
User avatar #289 to #75 - Marker (01/04/2013) [-]
I can't quite say I'm one to believe the whole out-of-body-experience thing, but I'm also not one to step on someone else's beliefs.
 Friends (0)