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Latest users (3): cyberdemon, greyshirt, sugoi, anonymous(31).
What do you think? Give us your opinion. Anonymous comments allowed.
User avatar #110524 - oborawatabinost (01/06/2014) [-]
Not looking for any life advice, I'd just like to know what you guys think are the best settings to run uTorrent most effectively.
User avatar #110529 to #110524 - rokkarokkaali (01/06/2014) [-]
Have the download cap to unlimited
that usually helps
#110519 - xnotcreative (01/06/2014) [-]
Does anyone know a website I can use Photoshop on without download?

I want to help a friend date a girl older than him... but the thing is, she doesn't date younger guys so I'm trying to make a fake school ID and was wondering if anyone can help me help him by doing this?
User avatar #110525 to #110519 - delphine (01/06/2014) [-]
Agreed with awesomerninjathing.

She's going to find out eventually. If she doesn't date younger guys it's probably for a reason, and your friend should either use his wit and charm to convince her to make an exception or find someone else.
User avatar #110522 to #110519 - awesomerninjathing ONLINE (01/06/2014) [-]
Don't do that. It's not good to base a relationship off of lies
#110517 - anonymous (01/06/2014) [-]
Is there anywhere I can look at legal pictures of hot <18 teens?
User avatar #110764 to #110517 - noxiouspumpkin (01/08/2014) [-]
Funnyjunk.
User avatar #110530 to #110517 - rokkarokkaali (01/06/2014) [-]
facebook
User avatar #110521 to #110517 - awesomerninjathing ONLINE (01/06/2014) [-]
nudist websites
User avatar #110504 - salivarocker (01/06/2014) [-]
Ok so in the past two months i've started noticing this girl and after a while we started hanging out. the only problem is she's a cutter when she gets down. Not like full length but it still urks me, i want to help but she won't help me. We've talked about a relationship and i want it to happen and so does she. I just don't like self-harm at all i honestly like her so much but i don't know what to do.
User avatar #110506 to #110504 - hawaiianhappysauce (01/06/2014) [-]
Avoid her. She has problems that you cannot help her with. I can't force you to listen to me, but women who have issues like this are dangerous. Often times they drag you down with them. This is just my opinion of course, but still, you should think hard about this.
User avatar #110509 to #110506 - salivarocker (01/06/2014) [-]
I've helped women with worse problems than this though. I've helped two through suicide and another through just depression and they're all better now. Those i helped because of the friendship before it. I'm wanting to help this one because i like her to an extreme amount.
User avatar #110510 to #110509 - hawaiianhappysauce (01/06/2014) [-]
Well then you are a very good person, and women aren't attracted to good people. Most women enjoy being treated like crap. So the best relationship you can be with her if you want to help her is as a friend.
User avatar #110511 to #110510 - salivarocker (01/06/2014) [-]
If that's what it takes for me to help her through this... that's i'd rather be helpful and not have a relationship than have her miserable and be in one.
User avatar #110512 to #110511 - hawaiianhappysauce (01/06/2014) [-]
Then help her.
User avatar #110513 to #110512 - salivarocker (01/06/2014) [-]
I plan on it, thanks.
#110514 to #110513 - aceonfire (01/06/2014) [-]
Do it. I'm engaged to someone who used to cut, but after we started dating I helped her through it. If you care about her then it is definitely worth it.
User avatar #110520 to #110514 - salivarocker (01/06/2014) [-]
I've only known her for months but even thinking about her cutting makes me tear up, i want to do all i can to help her through it and i will.
User avatar #110496 - revengeforfreeze (01/06/2014) [-]
anyone else ashamed of masturbating or doing things that relate to sex and feel that it's wrong and disgusting alternatively entartete?
User avatar #110540 to #110496 - justaperson (01/06/2014) [-]
Once you jack off in front of a girl and then slap her in the face with your dick. You realize there was never any real shame to start with.
#110570 to #110540 - thegrohltroll (01/06/2014) [-]
Goddamn that made me laugh
Goddamn that made me laugh
User avatar #110515 to #110496 - hawaiianhappysauce (01/06/2014) [-]
Everyone does it, so why be ashamed?
User avatar #110488 - stutterguy (01/06/2014) [-]
How do you get over the feel of guilt?

Basically I was out down town with friends and this guy was being a right dick to my friends, and because I'm a guy he just completely ignored my existence so I did something rather mean without him know.
User avatar #110498 to #110488 - awesomerninjathing ONLINE (01/06/2014) [-]
what did you do
User avatar #110500 to #110498 - stutterguy (01/06/2014) [-]
I kinda went to the bathroom, ripped a part of my toe nail off, then put it into his drink and watched him drink it. He pulled a funny face when he drank the last bit. I'm guessing he felt it...
#110505 to #110500 - ilikethisusername (01/06/2014) [-]
nice..........
nice..........
User avatar #110502 to #110501 - stutterguy (01/06/2014) [-]
I'm a bad person.
User avatar #110638 to #110502 - angelodlt (01/07/2014) [-]
Holy shit thats nice
User avatar #110475 - contradiction (01/05/2014) [-]
so i'm going to start losing weight for my upcoming football season and for being healthy in general but i have one problem. with all pleasantly plump people comes the man titties, i want to lose them but i want to know if i can without doing chest workouts. the only reason is because i'm getting surgery on my shoulder and i cant do anything with my arms for 6 months. so will eating healthy and just doing cardio be enough to get rid of them( i dont need to have amazing pecs just a flat chest).
User avatar #110483 to #110475 - heraske (01/06/2014) [-]
Cardio workouts + eat less = loss of weight.
User avatar #110480 to #110475 - delphine (01/06/2014) [-]
Building muscle under fat tissue is the best way, but if you do enough cardio you'll lose weight all over, and your moobs should decrease in size-- a good fix, at least until you're healed enough to start bench pressing or doing push ups.
User avatar #110484 to #110480 - contradiction (01/06/2014) [-]
ill be able to do push ups during fall and winter but i can really start doing work in the winter again.
as long as i can decrease their size through a proper diet and exercise ill be good.
User avatar #110477 to #110475 - friendlypitbull (01/05/2014) [-]
I don't know if this helps, but my boyfriend had the most whopping pair of man titties 'til he started riding his bike every day to work.
User avatar #110474 - adrilazzaro (01/05/2014) [-]
Well guys, it's been a nice run, It's today in the last few hours before school that i realize how much time i have wasted on funnyjunk, dozens of assignments and homework i leave until later, just overall immense amount of procrastination and lazyness i spend on this site. I do nothing productive. I am going to delete my account, unless there's a way i could block myself for a few years without deleting it.
User avatar #110508 to #110474 - averagewhitekid (01/06/2014) [-]
Disable your account?
User avatar #110476 to #110474 - joeofold (01/05/2014) [-]
Don't do it, you will just end up going onto something else and regret stopping yourself from coming here. Just try and work through it ask someone to sit with you when you do the work so you will have to do it (may sound childish but it does work).
#110473 - nigalthornberry (01/05/2014) [-]
Well i got thsi from her now
she also says good morning,goodnight and seems more open now
User avatar #110497 to #110473 - revengeforfreeze (01/06/2014) [-]
this ur vcousin?
User avatar #110453 - dragx (01/05/2014) [-]
Hey Advice board. I have a problem. This applies with homework and tests but in this case a test.. I procrastinate soo much and begin dropping in grades, how can I fix this, I literally procrastinate till the last minute, literally minutes before my test. EVEN RIGHT NOW!!! I COULD BE REVISING BUT I'M NOT. How do I overcome this cause I fear its gonna have a long term effect on my life.
User avatar #110481 to #110453 - rebornpooper (01/06/2014) [-]
I advise you to eat poopy.
User avatar #110466 to #110453 - ScottP (01/05/2014) [-]
Don't turn on the computer when you do your homework unless you need it. Get rid of as many distractions as possible. Put your phone away, etc.

ALSO DO YOUR WORK RIGHT NOW
User avatar #110470 to #110466 - dragx (01/05/2014) [-]
I always need my computer, don't use my phone much anyways, and its too late :'(
User avatar #110471 to #110470 - ScottP (01/05/2014) [-]
You need to constantly remind yourself to do your work for a start then.
User avatar #110472 to #110471 - dragx (01/05/2014) [-]
ok, thanks ;)

I think I need a better motive.
#110438 - goddammittyrone (01/05/2014) [-]
Hey FJ, I have been really fascinated by Dj's and band like Daft Punk (my favorite) and i am really interested in buying some Music equipment for this kind of stuff. I'm not really experienced on this kind of stuff, so does anyone know some some beginners equipment that i could get started out on to make music with?
User avatar #110482 to #110438 - rebornpooper (01/06/2014) [-]
I advise you to eat poopy.
User avatar #110440 to #110438 - misticalz (01/05/2014) [-]
Here's something I made with Ableton, sampling from Delegation's song "One More Step To Take" soundcloud.com/mrhalcyonmusic/halcyon-that-summer-feeling
#110456 to #110440 - goddammittyrone (01/05/2014) [-]
Sweet man, i love it. Got anymore to share?
#110443 to #110440 - mintaj (01/05/2014) [-]
This is some nice shit, props to you, man
User avatar #110469 to #110443 - misticalz (01/05/2014) [-]
Thanks m8
User avatar #110439 to #110438 - misticalz (01/05/2014) [-]
Ableton/FL Studio/Reason/Logic/Cubase/Reaper for music production
Numark Mixtrack Pro (1 or 2) for DJing
Fostex monitors (or any kind, around 500-700 bucks)
If you wanna make music like Daft Punk you gotta sample.
Look up 60s-80s disco artists like Delegation and sample from them.
Look up on Youtube "French House Sadowick" It's a nice tutorial on French House (The genre Daft Punk makes)
#110485 to #110439 - goddammittyrone (01/06/2014) [-]
I have a question misticalz, out of all the music producers you mentioned, which do you prefer.
User avatar #110486 to #110485 - misticalz (01/06/2014) [-]
Ableton.
#110489 to #110486 - goddammittyrone (01/06/2014) [-]
Another question, how do you sample a song. And, avoiding copywright at the same time
User avatar #110490 to #110489 - misticalz (01/06/2014) [-]
If you sample a song you can't sell the song you made with it.
Just give credit and you should be fine
#110491 to #110490 - goddammittyrone (01/06/2014) [-]
Alright, nice. And sampling itself?
User avatar #110492 to #110491 - misticalz (01/06/2014) [-]
what do you mean?
#110493 to #110492 - goddammittyrone (01/06/2014) [-]
Say i like a song a want to sample it, how do i get that song onto my Ableton and start making music with it. (sorry for the confusion, like i said, im not experienced.)
User avatar #110494 to #110493 - misticalz (01/06/2014) [-]
just download it with a youtube to mp3 converter
You can just drag and drop .mp3, .wav and .aiff files into ableton.

after that, as I said before you should look up "French House SADOWICK Production"
He has a few tuts on it.
#110495 to #110494 - goddammittyrone (01/06/2014) [-]
Alright thanks again, i owe you one.
#110487 to #110486 - goddammittyrone (01/06/2014) [-]
Wow that was fast. And thanks again
#110455 to #110439 - goddammittyrone (01/05/2014) [-]
Thanks man, i will definitely check the stuff out
User avatar #110434 - stockphotos (01/05/2014) [-]
miscarriage
#110431 - anonymous (01/05/2014) [-]
Why do most (young) girls who like alternative music feel the need to look alternative as well?
The image is of a random girl on okcupid. Every girl I came across who liked rock music had a look similar to that. Even the ones I personally know/know of who like alternative music look somewhat similar as well

As for the guys who I know/know of who like alternative music, many just have a completely generic image about them; they could like gangsta rap or classical music for all I know.
User avatar #110479 to #110431 - prettypalmtrees (01/06/2014) [-]
Really? Because people constantly ask why I don't dress like the music I listen to
i.e. avenged sevenfold, metallica, etc
User avatar #110478 to #110431 - friendlypitbull (01/06/2014) [-]
Because girls like to pose more than they like actually listening to music
User avatar #110441 to #110431 - ljxjlos (01/05/2014) [-]
If that´s a problem to you, you should really search help...or go to a place where you can learn what real problems are...What´s next? "I´m annoyed, why do forks mostly only have 4 forkrakes"?
User avatar #110436 to #110431 - misticalz (01/05/2014) [-]
"it's not a phase mom "
User avatar #110433 to #110431 - flowerx (01/05/2014) [-]
I love alternative music and I hardly look like that at all now. I still like to wear band shirts and keep my hair black though
User avatar #110432 to #110431 - kelseymiss (01/05/2014) [-]
its just to show we show more interest in the bands we like than guys do
User avatar #110427 - friendlypitbull (01/05/2014) [-]
Why does alcohol make my poop so runny?

I'm tired of having to wipe like a million times
#110428 to #110427 - mintaj (01/05/2014) [-]
Life's not a fairy tale, son.
User avatar #110430 to #110428 - friendlypitbull (01/05/2014) [-]
Good thing I don't have a furry tail, it'd be clumped with crap all the time.
User avatar #110419 - ScottP (01/05/2014) [-]
Does anyone here speak/read Czech? A friend of mine sent me this message three years back and I've never been able to translate it. I've just been kinda' wondering what it meant:

Nemocný ti přátelskou pusu na vář
User avatar #110437 to #110419 - misticalz (01/05/2014) [-]
Here it is one word at a time on google translate
Ill
The
Friendly
Mouth
On
Boiling

I'm thinking of blowjobs or a kiss. Iunno
User avatar #110447 to #110437 - ScottP (01/05/2014) [-]
I think I'm gonna' go along the lines of some sort of kiss. She also did follow up that message with "Let's keep that between you and me ;)"
#110425 to #110419 - anonymous (01/05/2014) [-]
I really want to fuck your mum
#110421 to #110419 - aceonfire (01/05/2014) [-]
I don't know the context or speak czech, so I don't know how far off google translate could be on this one.
User avatar #110423 to #110421 - ScottP (01/05/2014) [-]
Yeah I tried Google Translate, but it doesn't seem to make sense since I've never kissed her on the cheek...
#110424 to #110423 - aceonfire (01/05/2014) [-]
have you tried asking her what it means?
User avatar #110426 to #110424 - ScottP (01/05/2014) [-]
Yeah. She's always just been like "You have to figure it out."
User avatar #110435 to #110426 - awesomerninjathing ONLINE (01/05/2014) [-]
I think she wants/wanted your D
#110503 to #110435 - aceonfire (01/06/2014) [-]
I think you are right
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#110402 - mintaj has deleted their comment [-]
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#110401 - friendlypitbull has deleted their comment [-]
User avatar #110391 - beatmasterz (01/05/2014) [-]
Can you still confess in a church if you're not christian? What does the priest say?
User avatar #110407 to #110391 - iridium (01/05/2014) [-]
I don't see why you can, I just don't know what the hell the point would be.
User avatar #110416 to #110407 - misticalz (01/05/2014) [-]
to get something of his chest without consequence.
#110422 to #110416 - aceonfire (01/05/2014) [-]
Thats what forums like this are for.
User avatar #110404 to #110391 - misticalz (01/05/2014) [-]
POW POW POW POW POW
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