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126 comments displayed.
#173165 - anon
Reply 0
(01/30/2015) [-]
hey guys. My boyfriend is shy and he never makes the first move, I always have to initiate sex... how do I get him to come on to me sometimes?
#173203 to #173165 - dehumanizer ONLINE
Reply -1
(01/31/2015) [-]
lose some weight you fat sack of shit
#173173 to #173165 - fffffffuuuuuuuuuuu
Reply 0
(01/31/2015) [-]
Be direct. Bluntly direct.
#173166 to #173165 - genericnewfag
Reply +3
(01/30/2015) [-]
ask him
#173159 - istrollid
Reply -2
(01/30/2015) [-]
join the stoner board www.funnyjunk.com/hobby/
#173158 - ruffntuff
Reply 0
(01/30/2015) [-]
I would like to earn more green thumbs for content.
What would be a good topic to do a comp on?
#173168 to #173158 - genericnewfag
Reply +1
(01/30/2015) [-]
whatever you know a lot about
#173195 to #173168 - ruffntuff
Reply 0
(01/31/2015) [-]
Hmm... I'd have to think about that.
#173161 to #173158 - focalanemo
Reply +1
(01/30/2015) [-]
Random facts
#173196 to #173161 - ruffntuff
Reply 0
(01/31/2015) [-]
I think I'll try that. Thanks!
#173157 - tsoper
Reply +1
(01/30/2015) [-]
Im going to confess to my sister that I find her sexually attractive...

Any advice on whats the best way to go about this?

Extra info: She probably knows from the numerous hints I gave her, but I dont think she's into that. Although some days she seems to show interest.

Im just going to be straight forward with her. "Hey sis, i just want to tell you that Im sexually attracted to you. I feel so horrible about it and its wrong but I just cant help myself. I just wanted to let you know because it hurts keeping it a secret and I dont know what to do about it... So just wanted to let you know, are you ok with this?"

Wish me luck. Anything else i should add in?
#173212 to #173157 - fistfireace
Reply 0
(01/31/2015) [-]
This sounds like that one dude who usually comes on here and says he wants to fuck his sister.   He was a lying fuck.  So you could be too, for all I know.
This sounds like that one dude who usually comes on here and says he wants to fuck his sister. He was a lying fuck. So you could be too, for all I know.
#173194 to #173157 - genericnewfag
Reply +1
(01/31/2015) [-]
post results
#173184 to #173157 - spookyexplain
Reply +1
(01/31/2015) [-]
dont
#173181 to #173157 - gmanofwonder
Reply 0
(01/31/2015) [-]
But um... If you bone her, you bone her.
#173176 to #173157 - gmanofwonder
Reply 0
(01/31/2015) [-]
You've got to play it cool if you're gonna do this.

Now I know obviously this is some goddamn creepy shit, but man you're your own man and we all gotta deal with weird shit from time to time.

The best way to do it, is to lead into that conversation with an idea that you both can agree with. By the way, don't say sexually attractive; attractive is the same thing if you're talking to someone of the opposite sex in this society. She'll get it then and sexually doesn't need to be added.

Now, if I was in your spot?
something like this.
"Isn't it so fucking annoying how like, humans have to be attracted to people you don't like or some shit?"
She'll agree with it, go with it. She'll go into some story or some shit.
That would be the best time to say it to her.
"Yeah.. I mean your my sister and I'm attracted to you, and like, what? am I right?"
keep her laughing as you tell her this and hope it plays out for the best my man.

Good luck sir. Good fucking luck.
#173172 to #173157 - Decode
Reply +1
(01/31/2015) [-]
If you're not kidding this is one of those moments where everyone knows it's a bad idea but you say "what's the worst that can happen?"

Then you regret this for the rest of your life
#173169 to #173157 - iridium
Reply +2
(01/30/2015) [-]
This isn't fiction bro. There's like a really good chance she's going to call you creepy.
#173170 to #173169 - iridium
Reply +2
(01/30/2015) [-]
At the very least. And she's probably gonna hold this against you for the rest of your life.
#173167 to #173157 - genericnewfag
Reply +4
(01/30/2015) [-]
oh god no stop
#173164 to #173157 - teoberry
Reply +3
(01/30/2015) [-]
there is no way this would end well for you. js
#173160 to #173157 - ruffntuff
Reply +2
(01/30/2015) [-]
Show her a bunch of those "wincest" pictures and see how she reacts to them.
#173154 - ruffntuff
Reply 0
(01/30/2015) [-]
Hey, advice board

Can someone explain to me how to properly save .gifs? It would be much appreciated and will be rewarded with a green thumb.

THANKS!
#173174 to #173154 - fffffffuuuuuuuuuuu
Reply +5
(01/31/2015) [-]
Right mouse button   
Save as
Right mouse button
Save as

#173197 to #173174 - ruffntuff
Reply 0
(01/31/2015) [-]
Sorry, bud. I'm just seeing this. I believe I've tried that before, but the .gifs didn't play. So you save it like a normal picture and it's supposed to move and all that when you view it?
#173230 to #173197 - fffffffuuuuuuuuuuu
Reply +1
(01/31/2015) [-]
As a thumbnail, it doesn't move. If you click on a .gif in file form it will (on default) your browser will open with the gif played in it. To be sure that it works, just select the gif you've saved when replying to something on FunnyJunk. Cheers m9
#173235 to #173230 - ruffntuff
Reply +1
(01/31/2015) [-]
Thanks, friend!
#173177 to #173174 - gmanofwonder
Reply +1
(01/31/2015) [-]
He didn't give you one, so I did instead.
#173198 to #173177 - ruffntuff
Reply 0
(01/31/2015) [-]
I delivered. I'm just seeing this. Thank you for your concern and green thumb, though! Both are much appreciated!
#173135 - anon
Reply 0
(01/30/2015) [-]
I have a big insecurity problem I think.

I mean I have an Okcupid account and no pics of me. Still I can't message girls because I don't know, I'm afraid of rejection or humilliation.

How do I get over this?
#173175 to #173135 - fffffffuuuuuuuuuuu
Reply 0
(01/31/2015) [-]
You gotta get past your fears. Do what you fear in order to kill it, take a risk. Without risk, you won't fail, and without fail you won't grow as a person. The pain you may receive after rejections is something you must learn to deal with. If you keep suppressing your fears, it will come back after you every time. What you resist, will persist. In order to change you gotta make the decision to fucking do it.

TL;DR: Do it to get over it.
#173149 to #173135 - hoponthefeelstrain ONLINE
Reply 0
(01/30/2015) [-]
what's the point of making an account on a dating website if you won't put our picture up? Rejection will happen and that's just something you'll have to brush off. Just have a little confidence. Dress better and work out, it'll make you feel better about yourself.
#173151 to #173149 - anon
Reply 0
(01/30/2015) [-]
But that's the thing. I already work out but what if someone I know sees I have one dating account.

I would be so ashamed. But that's not even the main problem as I even can't talk to some girls I don't know just because they may be fuckin' rude. Or just becase I don't know what to say.
#173162 to #173151 - hoponthefeelstrain ONLINE
Reply 0
(01/30/2015) [-]
if your friend finds out you have one then it's because they're browsing okcupid too. When meeting someone new, ask about their interests and if you have one in common, talk about it together
#173171 to #173162 - anon
Reply 0
(01/31/2015) [-]
thanks fella, you're right
#173116 - charizarddad
Reply 0
(01/30/2015) [-]
how do file income tax? just got my first job in august of 2014 and just turned 18 two months ago. i got my w2 already, what now?
#173152 to #173116 - braveblue
Reply 0
(01/30/2015) [-]
Ask your parents.
#173110 - ampt
Reply 0
(01/30/2015) [-]
I want to get a gameboy advance emulator for my laptop, but I don't really know where to start. Any advice on where to begin/what is a good emulator? Thanks.
I want to get a gameboy advance emulator for my laptop, but I don't really know where to start. Any advice on where to begin/what is a good emulator? Thanks.
#173114 to #173110 - arenaferox
Reply +1
(01/30/2015) [-]
I used virtualboy and it worked great.
#173150 to #173114 - enjoigiggity
Reply 0
(01/30/2015) [-]
I use visualboyadvance and that works pretty well
#173153 to #173150 - ruffntuff
Reply 0
(01/30/2015) [-]
You can't get Pokemon for gameboy advance on coolrom.com anymore

Anywhere else where I can get a good emulator along with Pokemon games?
#173115 to #173114 - ampt
Reply 0
(01/30/2015) [-]
I'll look into it, thanks!
I'll look into it, thanks!
#173107 - ssheinrich
Reply 0
(01/30/2015) [-]
do anyone have this guy saying 10/10 best game ever webm?
#173113 to #173107 - ampt
Reply +1
(01/30/2015) [-]
Its Jontron (if you didn't already know). Look him up on Youtube. I don't have his the one you want. Heres another one though.
#173112 to #173107 - focalanemo
Reply 0
(01/30/2015) [-]
ask autism board
#173106 - sineztro
Reply 0
(01/30/2015) [-]
So you know that feeling you get when waters in your ear, like all pressurized and stuff, how do I get rid of it, I don't have water in my car nor any debris that I could find
#173249 to #173106 - sineztro
Reply 0
(01/31/2015) [-]
hey thirdjess and dehumanizer my ear is fixed, turns out it need to be repressurized
#173134 to #173106 - thirdjess
Reply 0
(01/30/2015) [-]
Try depressurising your ears by holding your nose shut keeping your mouth closed and blowing until they pop/click.
#173146 to #173134 - sineztro
Reply 0
(01/30/2015) [-]
Will do
#173108 to #173106 - dehumanizer ONLINE
Reply +1
(01/30/2015) [-]
visit doctor
#173118 to #173108 - sineztro
Reply 0
(01/30/2015) [-]
Okie dokie should I visit today or should I wait like till first thing tomorrow?
#173119 to #173118 - dehumanizer ONLINE
Reply +1
(01/30/2015) [-]
your ear might have gotten sore, doctor should have a look and maybe perscribe you som medicine
#173103 - anon
Reply -1
(01/30/2015) [-]
How to get more erect? nver had any problems with it until I got sick a few weeks ago. i am not sick anymore, not even a bit, but i still can't get as hard as i used to. i can cum but it's not the same.
Would doing sports again help? i used to go to the gym but i stopped like 2 month ago. or is it just some psychological shit?
#173120 to #173103 - dehumanizer ONLINE
Reply 0
(01/30/2015) [-]
minutes, what did you say
#173270 to #173120 - minutes
Reply 0
(01/31/2015) [-]
replying here cause comment thread too long

Where did you get that information from? You don't have any experience concerning relationships, don't you? There are lot's of happily married couples. My parents for example.
#173271 to #173270 - dehumanizer ONLINE
Reply 0
(01/31/2015) [-]
I got rejected twice, it gave me PTSD.   
   
well mind you good sir my parents are an example to me, they are still together but i think its pritty much becasue they're stuck and they have a kid to raise.
I got rejected twice, it gave me PTSD.

well mind you good sir my parents are an example to me, they are still together but i think its pritty much becasue they're stuck and they have a kid to raise.
#173272 to #173271 - minutes
Reply 0
(01/31/2015) [-]
I think you know that you're talking bullshit when you say all that "hurr durr all women are cunts" stuff.
Get over yourself. It's incredibly hard, but why would it be easy?
#173326 to #173272 - dehumanizer ONLINE
Reply 0
(02/01/2015) [-]
look buddie I knew one decent girl and it turned out she was even wickeder than the rest
#173347 to #173326 - minutes
Reply 0
(02/01/2015) [-]
You either know not enough girls or you live in a shitty area. There are good ones.
#173348 to #173347 - dehumanizer ONLINE
Reply 0
(02/01/2015) [-]
Yes there are. And they are all perfectly happy with their boyfriends.
Yes there are. And they are all perfectly happy with their boyfriends.
#173350 to #173348 - minutes
Reply 0
(02/01/2015) [-]
You're so full of shit. Not ALL of them.
#173351 to #173350 - dehumanizer ONLINE
Reply 0
(02/01/2015) [-]
how can they be good then?
#173121 to #173120 - minutes
Reply 0
(01/30/2015) [-]
I wanted to mock you for thumbing this down but when I saw it written I thought it's dumb/childish so i deleted it instantly.
#173122 to #173121 - dehumanizer ONLINE
Reply 0
(01/30/2015) [-]
>mocking me

fucking normalfags you're all the same, day of retribution soon
#173123 to #173122 - minutes
Reply 0
(01/30/2015) [-]
Well why did you thumb it down?
#173124 to #173123 - dehumanizer ONLINE
Reply 0
(01/30/2015) [-]
beeing unable to get hard is a blessing, he shouldnt try to get bac kbefore
#173125 to #173124 - minutes
Reply 0
(01/30/2015) [-]
It's not a blessing if you have a gf.
#173127 to #173126 - minutes
Reply 0
(01/30/2015) [-]
I don't even know what to say anymore. Not every girl is like this.
#173142 to #173127 - dehumanizer ONLINE
Reply 0
(01/30/2015) [-]
keep dreaming
#173128 to #173127 - serhiy ONLINE
Reply 0
(01/30/2015) [-]
don't argue with him, i did it yesterday, he ends up whining about his life to you in the most half assed fashion, like he's expecting you to pay him or something.
#173139 to #173128 - dehumanizer ONLINE
Reply 0
(01/30/2015) [-]
btw how tall are you?
#173143 to #173139 - serhiy ONLINE
Reply 0
(01/30/2015) [-]
6ft 1 -2
#173145 to #173143 - dehumanizer ONLINE
Reply 0
(01/30/2015) [-]
well you're gonna make it then, im physicly disabled 5'9 ish
#173214 to #173145 - minutes
Reply 0
(01/31/2015) [-]
And again, I am 5'4. Stop trying to find excuses.
#173226 to #173214 - dehumanizer ONLINE
Reply 0
(01/31/2015) [-]
so what? you got lucky
#173227 to #173226 - minutes
Reply 0
(01/31/2015) [-]
Yes, you can get lucky too. As long as you try to make your chances of that happening as big as possible. The more you go out - the more people you get to know - the better you look - the funnier you are - the more interesting you get - the bigger are your chances.
#173232 to #173227 - dehumanizer ONLINE
Reply 0
(01/31/2015) [-]
>the bigger your chances are

kek you know 100x0 is 0 right?
#173240 to #173232 - minutes
Reply 0
(01/31/2015) [-]
I didn't say anything about multiplying. I said getting bigger. 0+1 = 1
#173242 to #173240 - dehumanizer ONLINE
Reply 0
(01/31/2015) [-]
1% + 3% = 4% successs

96% faliure

cool story
#173268 to #173242 - minutes
Reply 0
(01/31/2015) [-]
You can't just pull stats out of your ass. Also, even if that was right: 4% success > 1%
You want to suceed so you should take anything you can get even if it's only a really small thing, as long as it helps it's taking you a little step closer to your goal.
#173269 to #173268 - dehumanizer ONLINE
0
(01/31/2015) [-]
but this success is a lie, it doesent exist women only exist to destroy men
#173129 to #173128 - minutes
Reply 0
(01/30/2015) [-]
I know him. I am a frequent user on this board and I talk to him quite a lot. I kind of gave up arguing with him a few times already but I can't just sit there and watch so I try again and again.
#173130 to #173129 - serhiy ONLINE
Reply 0
(01/30/2015) [-]
yeah, i see him often aswell, I count it as shit posting. I've also pointed out his hypocrisies but he doesn't care.
#173132 to #173130 - minutes
Reply 0
(01/30/2015) [-]
He used to listen to me a bit, he even followed my advice once, but since I got a girlfriend he just calls me normalfag. Whatever, I'll still talk and listen to him.
#173140 to #173132 - dehumanizer ONLINE
Reply 0
(01/30/2015) [-]
>gib shit advice
>i fail
>you dont follow your own advice
>u get a gf
#173141 to #173140 - minutes
Reply 0
(01/30/2015) [-]
I did follow my own advice..
#173144 to #173141 - dehumanizer ONLINE
Reply 0
(01/30/2015) [-]
you didnt ask her out if she liked you ASAP
#173147 to #173144 - minutes
Reply 0
(01/30/2015) [-]
Then why did she tell her best friend (who happens to be the gf of a friend of mine) that "she isn't interested in me, i am too small" ? It wasn't that easy.
#173148 to #173147 - dehumanizer ONLINE
Reply 0
(01/30/2015) [-]
nigga you told me to ask her out asap, i did

you didnt ask her out at start and only went out a few months after you became friends
#173213 to #173148 - minutes
Reply 0
(01/31/2015) [-]
I asked her out after a few month of texting. That's not really being friends imo. I really thought I am fighting a lost battle since she actively told others that she doesn't want me, still asked her out and tata I got lucky. I don't see how that's so much different.
#173225 to #173213 - dehumanizer ONLINE
Reply 0
(01/31/2015) [-]
Lets just say i didnt do exactly that.
#173133 to #173132 - serhiy ONLINE
Reply +1
(01/30/2015) [-]
your doing the work which no normal being can, keep on it.
#173117 to #173103 - minutes
0
has deleted their comment [-]
#173097 - gabsmatags
Reply 0
(01/30/2015) [-]
Guys, I need advice on Valentines day gifts. I started doodling on my table and come up with this cute comic card idea for my boyfriend, but I'm afraid that he'll think that's lame. Would that suck as a gift?
#173098 to #173097 - anon
Reply -1
(01/30/2015) [-]
yes
give him a blowjob
#173096 - ratchetmiles
Reply 0
(01/30/2015) [-]
I recently left a relationship (I'm a dude if that matters to you). My girlfriend wanted a family. We never had anything in common. We didn't even have anything to talk about, she always wanted to go to the park, I didn't. I wanted to focus on a career goals. I like being alone. I like being in control. I like being a whole, not a piece. Being in a relationship made me feel like I was cuffed to her. My girlfriend wasn't abusive or anything, she was really nice, but one day, she got really pissed that I didn't talk to her much or go to the park. This is where I felt like I was just her hobby or something. Even though I broke up, I feel like I was doing wrong. She needed me, but, I didn't need her. I don't want to get back into a relationship, but, I always feel like she's miserable without me. I'd hope she can just forget me and do her own thing. I don't feel like I shouldn't have broken up with her, I feel like I shouldn't have hooked up with her. It would save her from any heartache. I'm not upset or anything, I just ponder upon it.
#173136 to #173096 - thirdjess
Reply 0
(01/30/2015) [-]
Nah man, you did the right thing. Continuing in a relationship where your long term goals do not match up is just leading her on. Particularly in the case of getting married and having kids.
#173101 to #173096 - iridium
Reply 0
(01/30/2015) [-]
Beginning to think we need a vent board. Cool and all on you for getting out of something you didn't feel you needed to be a part of any longer, but is there anything you need help with or are you just looking for a place to vent your mind?
#173104 to #173101 - ratchetmiles
Reply 0
(01/30/2015) [-]
I'm just wondering if I'm in the wrong for my decisions.
#173105 to #173104 - anon
Reply 0
(01/30/2015) [-]
I don't think so. It seems like you didn't have too strong of feelings for her. If it went on it just would have been worse for her.
#173092 - ilikethisusername
0
has deleted their comment [-]
#173093 to #173092 - makotoitou
Reply +1
(01/30/2015) [-]
plow that shit
#173088 - mattempire
Reply +1
(01/30/2015) [-]
can i get a mod to walk me through sfw/nsfw on fj please? i'd like to do some medical related comps but i don't strictly want to get banned for a diagram of a donger etc.
#173137 to #173088 - thirdjess
Reply 0
(01/30/2015) [-]
Personally I would consider putting that on another account, because if enough assholes spam report you for 'nsfw' you get banned automatically.
#173094 to #173088 - iridium
Reply 0
(01/30/2015) [-]
Education is fine I believe as long as it's not for the purpose of porn whatsoever I believe, and worst case scenario you can mosaic or blur part of it.
#173080 - lulzformalaysiaair
Reply +1
(01/30/2015) [-]
Getting wisdom teeth removed tomorrow. So how many painkillers can I safely take and get high from? First time fyi.
#173109 to #173080 - dehumanizer ONLINE
Reply 0
(01/30/2015) [-]
>wisdom teeth

Untermensch Detected
#173155 to #173109 - lulzformalaysiaair
Reply 0
(01/30/2015) [-]
What does that mean?
#173156 to #173155 - dehumanizer ONLINE
Reply 0
(01/30/2015) [-]
wisdom toothless master race here

www.livescience.com/27529-missing-wisdom-teeth.html

Please do not polute the genepool with your neanderthal tier mouth.
#173102 to #173080 - iridium
Reply 0
(01/30/2015) [-]
Don't fuck with prescription painkillers dude. There are far easier drugs to work with if you absolutely feel the need to get high. Take the recommended dose. There's a reason you need a permit to sell them and it isn't about getting high off of them. They have some powerful withdrawal symptoms and can fuck you up big time.
#173089 to #173080 - durkadurka
Reply +1
(01/30/2015) [-]
The painkillers I got just made me feel dizzy. Not worth it man.
#173082 to #173080 - teoberry
Reply +1
(01/30/2015) [-]
They'll give you a prescription. They probably won't get you high considering they'll prolly just give you tramadol or ketorac
#173081 to #173080 - tarfyki
Reply +1
(01/30/2015) [-]
The exact number they tell you to take
#173077 - corps
Reply +1
(01/30/2015) [-]
Just seen this a minute ago and I'm at a loss of words.

Thoughts on this anybody? More specifically women, perhaps?


Deleted my previous comment because the text color made it impossible to read. I always forget about that.
#173138 to #173077 - thirdjess
Reply 0
(01/30/2015) [-]
I'm a woman and kinda an outlier I think. One of those annoying shits that'll say one thing and want another, in this regard.

I feel weird about people doing favours for me, though it flatters me. So if someone opens my car doors for me, pulls out my chair for me, buys me a drink or something I'll tell them not to but I actually want them to keep doing it.

I don't want them to do those things because they think they have to, but if they insist it means they actually want to.. or at least that's my logic.
#173095 to #173077 - iridium
Reply 0
(01/30/2015) [-]
It's not going to stop me from it, though I will slam the door on any bitch who says this to me.
#173099 to #173095 - corps
Reply 0
(01/30/2015) [-]
I checked this bitch's profile out after I posted this screenshot. She seems to be one of those retarded cis-hating demisexual genderfluid trans-hippokins that are "triggered" by every other thing you say.

So I guess it's not as bad as I thought I was, since she's obviously just a dumbass.

But come on, I swear there's some kind of sub-species of human that are born without brains and we just haven't discovered it yet. Even though we all know of their stupidity.
#173100 to #173099 - iridium
Reply 0
(01/30/2015) [-]
It's not being born without a brain. There was a guy who was missing 75% of his brain and he STILL had an IQ of about 75 (retardation starts at 70).

These people have brains. They aren't fucking using them.
#173087 to #173077 - pixmantle
+1
has deleted their comment [-]
#173091 to #173087 - corps
Reply +1
(01/30/2015) [-]
Yeah, the last part of your comment is exactly what I'm wondering here.

Showing appreciation for someone random, or your wife/girlfriend is sexist? I don't fucking understand it. It's impossible to know if someone would do it for just women or for everybody. I want to continue on with this argument but there are just so many holes in it, it's just such a fucking retarded thing to say. I mean what the fuck?

Maybe from now on I'll just hold the door open for everybody, no matter what gender, race or religion they are, and then slam the fucking door in their face and tell them fuck you because apparently when you're nice to someone it's sexist now.
#173090 to #173087 - corps
0
has deleted their comment [-]
#173076 - corps
0
has deleted their comment [-]
#173075 - goddammittyrone
0
has deleted their comment [-]
#173072 - sry
Reply +1
(01/30/2015) [-]
whats that thing people use to draw on a computer, you know the kind where people make designs for shirts on a computer?
#173086 to #173072 - ScottP
Reply +1
(01/30/2015) [-]
Graphic tablets?