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User avatar #108577 - anenemy (12/24/2013) [-]
Has this board actually ever succeeded in helping people? I really want to know if I'd be wasting my time here.
User avatar #108633 to #108577 - ScottP (12/24/2013) [-]
Well people here have helped me after my ex broke up with me, and it's just nice to be able to vent things out and have other people bounce back and communicate.
User avatar #108617 to #108577 - aclopolipse (12/24/2013) [-]
That's the plus of having a format like this, as opposed to something like Yahoo! Answers - you actually get people coming back now and then to tell of how people's suggestions worked out for them. Naturally, some of the people still flop, but there are just as often success stories that inspire you to keep going with the advice business.
User avatar #108611 to #108577 - faithrider (12/24/2013) [-]
I have been on the giving end of good advice, and the receiving end of both good and bad advice. it really depends on what you need advice on. we seem to have people that actually know really well a lot of various fields of knowledge....
User avatar #108595 to #108577 - advicedude (12/24/2013) [-]
I believe so.
User avatar #108585 to #108577 - awesomerninjathing (12/24/2013) [-]
Depends on your question
User avatar #108579 to #108578 - anenemy (12/24/2013) [-]
I'm not calling you a liar, but I'm gonna need more than a one word reply.
User avatar #108597 to #108579 - thisisnachoday **User deleted account** (12/24/2013) [-]
These people's words are not written in stone. Your own judgement should tell you if you're wasting your time or not.
User avatar #108580 to #108579 - akho (12/24/2013) [-]
There was this one girl who asked what gets boys horny and I said "boobies" and all were of happy
#108565 - anon (12/24/2013) [-]
Oh god guys. Im freaking out. I know this girl okay? Shes an awesome girl but has some issues. She just constantly cheats on guys. There are times when shes sometimes seeing or fucking almost a dozen guys at once, juggling schedules for when she could see them. Anyway, recently one of the guys found out about this and he beat her up so bad that she ended up in a hospital on Guerrero street. I don't want her to have to go through this again. How can I help her?
User avatar #108673 to #108565 - iridium (12/24/2013) [-]
Talk to her. If she won't listen and just does it anyways, you probably can't help her.

I sure as heck would be very hesitant about getting in a relationship with her or having sexy time what with STDs n shit with her as well.
User avatar #108591 to #108565 - wydell (12/24/2013) [-]
Her fault the way I see it, why did you add the fact that it's in guerrero street?
User avatar #108604 to #108591 - slowbroking (12/24/2013) [-]
The Room - Roof Scene : "Oh Hi Mark" Because anon is obviously a troll.
User avatar #108575 to #108565 - anenemy (12/24/2013) [-]
Turn around and walk away. Never talk to her again.
User avatar #108574 to #108565 - awesomerninjathing (12/24/2013) [-]
Give her the best sex she's ever had in her life, then shoot her
User avatar #108572 to #108565 - misticalz (12/24/2013) [-]
You shouldn't help this bitch.
There's no way you can either.
But you can try anyways.
Just talk to her about it and try and get to the root of the problem.
User avatar #108552 - TheGodamnBatman (12/24/2013) [-]
Alright, the guy that was previously helping me stopped so I'll ask new people.

I don't want to copy and paste everything because its long and most people will skip it but heres the main points:

- I like my cousin's best friend
- Before I had feelings for her I made fn of her jokingly having a moustache in an awful attempt to be funny.
- I can't go around my cousin as me and the girl have only met a couple times so she usually stays around her side as she doesn't really know me or my cousins family either.

Which option do I do? Need a reply before the 25th..

Option A - Tell my cousin that I like her friend & tell her to give me her number and to see if the girl likes me to and once she gives me her number that night text her apologizing for the moustache thing and waiting to see what my cousin says if she likes me or not. If she says yes I'll ask her to hangout, If she says no I'll move on i guess.

Option B - Tell my cousin that I like her friend & tell her to give me her number and instead of telling my cousin to tell her, I apologize with the "Hey I'm [Insert Name], [Insert Cousin's Name] gave me your number and I was just texting to apologize about the Moustache thing I did to you. I guess it was because i'm not really the confident guy and I was trying to be funny and make you like me but I guess it kind of backfired and well not make you like me anymore, I am truthfully sorry about that and I was just doing it because I thought you were cute and liked you"
User avatar #108677 to #108552 - iridium (12/24/2013) [-]
Sorry I didnt answer you before, Ive been away from my computer for the past couple days due to Christmas plans. I thought I did answer your question though, yet it turns out I didn't. I think other people have probably answered it better than I would have though.
User avatar #108689 to #108677 - TheGodamnBatman (12/24/2013) [-]
It's alright, your advice helped a lot.
User avatar #108596 to #108552 - advicedude (12/24/2013) [-]
Option C - Don't over think it, be yourself, and forget that day ever happened.
User avatar #108576 to #108552 - anenemy (12/24/2013) [-]
How about you apologize for teasing her and NOT pouring your heart out to her in the same text message? This isn't a movie; you'll just end up confusing and frustrating her.
User avatar #108587 to #108576 - TheGodamnBatman (12/24/2013) [-]
Then what do I do? We are not in a position to see each other everyday. I only see her when she tags along with my cousin who doesn't come over that often anyway.

What should I say to her and how long would it be best to wait inbetween apologizing and asking her out?
User avatar #108588 to #108587 - anenemy (12/24/2013) [-]
However long it takes to find out if you're even compatible. You don't even know the girl.
User avatar #108589 to #108588 - TheGodamnBatman (12/24/2013) [-]
That is what I was planning to do. I just typed that up there as an example to loosely follow. I was planning to ask her to Bowling or Minigolf or something so we could talk together.

Although would that be to much also?

P.S: I wasn't going to stupidly tell her I like her in the first text, It really was just something I thought to put at the time. I know better then that hopefully.

Goddammit, I am a beta.
User avatar #108557 to #108552 - thisisnachoday **User deleted account** (12/24/2013) [-]
Option B but tell it to her face. Asking others for numbers and apologizing with text messages just shows you prefer the easy way. But that's just me.
User avatar #108562 to #108557 - TheGodamnBatman (12/24/2013) [-]
Thing is, I don't really get to decide when I see her. It's whenever she accompanys my cousin and it could be weeks before I see her again if I don't move now.
User avatar #108564 to #108562 - thisisnachoday **User deleted account** (12/24/2013) [-]
Then by all means, if you really want that girl, option B. Go get her tiger.
User avatar #108573 to #108564 - TheGodamnBatman (12/24/2013) [-]
Do you have any tips on what to say?
If she does agree to go out with me,this will be my first date and I don't really know what to do,where to take her or well anything to be honest.
User avatar #108590 to #108573 - thisisnachoday **User deleted account** (12/24/2013) [-]
Best advice I can give you: Just be yourself cliche I know , if she likes you, it should be because of who you are and not who you pretend to be. Don't be an asshole and make jokes about her appearance either. Just take her out to somewhere pleasant, somewhere you think she'll feel comfortable, as well as you too. That's the key, if you're both comfortable the rest will just flow.
Overall just be nice and considerate, be a man.

If you ever get a solid second date, give her something with a meaning she can describe with words, I can almost garantee that if she's a decent girl she won't get over you that easily.

But firstly just focus on getting that date.
User avatar #108543 - revengeforfreeze (12/23/2013) [-]
Has anyone here killed a person accidentaly or intentionally?

I wanna know
#108566 to #108543 - anon (12/24/2013) [-]
Ive actually seen someone on here admit to an accidental murder in a shockingly real way.
User avatar #108569 to #108566 - revengeforfreeze (12/24/2013) [-]
remember who it was?

what happened?
User avatar #108608 to #108569 - hawaiianhappysauce (12/24/2013) [-]
I remember the comment. It was about a kid climbing a tree with a friend really high, the kid shook the tree when they were both at the top, the friend fell and died.
#108570 to #108569 - anon (12/24/2013) [-]
I can't remember the story exactly but it was on some content that Admin posted, asking people about their deepest secrets. If you find the content, it should be one of the top comments.
User avatar #108571 to #108570 - revengeforfreeze (12/24/2013) [-]
damn, okay.

when was this posted?
#108581 to #108571 - anon (12/24/2013) [-]
Few months ago. I think it was between August-November but dont hold me to that
User avatar #108623 to #108581 - revengeforfreeze (12/24/2013) [-]
ah, okya thanks
#108545 to #108543 - swaggymcswag (12/24/2013) [-]
I did.   
Once, a filthy peasant looked at me, and he dropped dead from an overload of swag osmosis. That was a metaphor, silly casual brute. He died from shock from seeing somebody with such swag as myself.
I did.
Once, a filthy peasant looked at me, and he dropped dead from an overload of swag osmosis. That was a metaphor, silly casual brute. He died from shock from seeing somebody with such swag as myself.
#108531 - thefunnyside (12/23/2013) [-]
Alright FJ, when it comes to my abilities and things I can do, I'm basically a perfectionist. I feel like I have to be perfect and everything I do and I have to look perfect and act perfect and walk perfect and smell perfect  you get my point , and surprise surprise nothing I do is good enough for myself. I've more-less become bulimic too. I've also been struggling with self-harm for the past 6 months or so.   
TL;DR How can I chill the fuck out?
Alright FJ, when it comes to my abilities and things I can do, I'm basically a perfectionist. I feel like I have to be perfect and everything I do and I have to look perfect and act perfect and walk perfect and smell perfect you get my point , and surprise surprise nothing I do is good enough for myself. I've more-less become bulimic too. I've also been struggling with self-harm for the past 6 months or so.

TL;DR How can I chill the fuck out?
User avatar #108598 to #108531 - advicedude (12/24/2013) [-]
Eating and sleeping regularly and on almost a schedule.
User avatar #108544 to #108531 - revengeforfreeze (12/23/2013) [-]
do this
let your room be dirty for a few weeks
just masturbate, eat, sleep and shit
now you know true hedonism and you are no longer a perfectionist
just try to not think of doing anything right all that time
User avatar #108533 to #108531 - ScottP (12/23/2013) [-]
It used to think the same way too. I would always compare myself to other people, and my parents would do the same. Any accomplishment I made would be compared to my friends who usually accomplished better things. However, I came to the realization a month ago that I just don't care anymore. I don't care what other people are doing with their lives because it doesn't do anything for me.

It doesn't help me in any way at all to have that sort of mindset so I made a list of the things that I was not proud of that I have done, and all the things that I am proud of that I have done. In the end, I came to accept my achievements and I didn't take my failures as badly as before. You just have to accept that you can't possibly be perfect in everything. Tell yourself that no one can be perfect at everything. Accept that reality. It's the first step.
User avatar #108532 to #108531 - misticalz (12/23/2013) [-]
You forgot to put
>inb4 that's not the funnyside

Iunno nigga.
You just gotta stop caring.
Listen to calming music.
Find a new hobby.
User avatar #108534 to #108532 - thefunnyside (12/23/2013) [-]
every time I post something here I get that "well you're not thefunnyside at all" shit
User avatar #108535 to #108534 - misticalz (12/23/2013) [-]
I know, I've read every single one of ur posts.
User avatar #108536 to #108535 - thefunnyside (12/23/2013) [-]
I'm just saying. Sorry if I sounded like an asshole.
#108516 - anon (12/23/2013) [-]
Do straight guys ever fantasize about being fucked in the ass with a strapon or would it be more likely that he'd be leaning a little towards bisexuality if he thinks about that?
User avatar #108599 to #108516 - advicedude (12/24/2013) [-]
Straight guys usually don't want something going in their ass when some shits going out hurt enough.
User avatar #108612 to #108599 - faithrider (12/24/2013) [-]
i think this is the best way to describe exactly how i feel on the subject....

advicedude has done it again
User avatar #108568 to #108516 - xgameloverx (12/24/2013) [-]
Some guys do. Just because he likes it in the ass doesnt mean he's gay.
User avatar #108526 to #108516 - shoryuken (12/23/2013) [-]
If so, it would be had for him to call himself straight.
#108520 to #108519 - anon (12/23/2013) [-]
This guy I like keeps asking me to do that and I'm confused about it..
User avatar #108521 to #108520 - benjamino (12/23/2013) [-]
Anal play doesn't make you gay
#108510 - anon (12/23/2013) [-]
**anonymous rolls 030**
User avatar #108601 to #108510 - advicedude (12/24/2013) [-]
**advicedude rolls 226** lel
User avatar #108506 - revengeforfreeze (12/23/2013) [-]
Am I rude if I don't wish to add cousins or my grandfather to facebook?

I honestly just want friends on it. I post some nsfw stuff occasionaly and troll people
User avatar #108522 to #108506 - TheGodamnBatman (12/23/2013) [-]
Make a seperate account for Family or one with everyone on it and be respectful and be as dirty as you want on your other account.
User avatar #108523 to #108522 - revengeforfreeze (12/23/2013) [-]
Thinking about doing that.
#108497 - smilegoddamnit (12/23/2013) [-]
Awkward thing here, Christmas is coming, and I'm drawing my boyfriend a glamour shot of a human female/male. I was thinking of using one of these examples (digital-photography-school.com/posing-guide-21-sample-poses-to-get-you-started-with-glamour-photography) but I wanted it to be a little sexier. You see, we're both virgins till marriage or until it drives us so bat shit we have to fuck. We're both bi, as artists/writers both we try to provide material for their needs. I was thinking of drawing him both a male and female to suit his desires, and the figures I wish to look full of engergy.
If you could provide glamour references that are guidelines not actual photos it'd be apperciated!
As always, thanks FJ!
User avatar #108499 to #108497 - advicedude (12/23/2013) [-]
Those on the link look really good. Use those.
#108503 to #108499 - smilegoddamnit (12/23/2013) [-]
We meet again! Thank you for the opinion good sir!
#108487 - anon (12/23/2013) [-]
If the mother if a child is mexican and the father is White What color will the kid be?
User avatar #108501 to #108487 - advicedude (12/23/2013) [-]
Depends on which race features has more dominant traits.
User avatar #108496 to #108487 - makotoitou (12/23/2013) [-]
What are you, a racist?
#108482 - anon (12/23/2013) [-]
I'm working on my voice acting and I've been trying to do a voice like this one www.youtube.com/watch?feature=player_detailpage&v=sr2PyNriPWI#t=599 (Armin, the blond guy, voiced by youtuber Takahata101) For some reason it is really difficult to make myself sound like that. Any tips?
User avatar #108484 to #108482 - nigalthornberry (12/23/2013) [-]
Try pushing your tounge back and just have a stupider attitude

I got a job redoing some Paul harvey stuff like this since i have a deep bass voice i have to raise it and have more air behind it so i sound like im in the last quarter of my life
Its just something you have to practice
User avatar #108475 - unncommon (12/23/2013) [-]
My little cousin has been writing my shitty name in little eight-year-old adorable calligraphy...I just hope that he never in a million years follows my life-style but between the fights and getting in trouble it looks like he is. What the fuck do I do? I mean, I'm obviously a piece of shit, but honestly, them? I actually care about them. I don't want them to be me...what do? This is the first time I've needed real help, and I'm hoping you guys can pull through for me...
User avatar #108461 - kokanum ONLINE (12/23/2013) [-]
How do I increa-let me just come out with it
My ass is thin as hell, how do I fucking fix that?
User avatar #108473 to #108461 - makotoitou (12/23/2013) [-]
I need pics first
User avatar #108462 to #108461 - feelythefeel (12/23/2013) [-]
Just eat oranges. You'll be k.
User avatar #108453 - faithrider (12/23/2013) [-]
hey guys. so my stepdad is an internet nazi and my internet gets blocked at night. basically after midnight i don't get internet access on my network. i believe it is blocked at the router by ip address, because other specific computers don't have the blocking (i.e. his computer and my mom's) anyway, in an effort to make me be more motivated to learn on my own form the internet he says if i can find some way to unblock it myself from my pc, then he will permanently undo the blocking. my problem is i have tried googling, and i don't know what words to use to find what i am looking for... so i was wondering if any of you guys could help, step by step things or links to ways to get around it.

another strange thing i have found is that on the computer i am posting this form, i am on ubuntu and it doesn't block the internet on here... not sure if that has anything to do with the method. but interesting thing...
User avatar #108463 to #108453 - feelythefeel (12/23/2013) [-]
Just eat oranges. You'll be k.
User avatar #108518 to #108463 - lukagamer (12/23/2013) [-]
God damn it gangplank....................
User avatar #108452 - fickenjudes (12/23/2013) [-]
why cant i go on the nsfw boards, new profile
User avatar #108464 to #108452 - feelythefeel (12/23/2013) [-]
Just eat oranges. You'll be k.
User avatar #108443 - ilikethisusername ONLINE (12/23/2013) [-]
Ok I just want advice so I came to the advice board...I mostly see love questions here but I hope you guys can still help me out. Ok so here it goes:

I am 17 years old, still in High School taking an extra year in High School so I can have at least 6 university courses to go to a university. Why do I need to go to a university? To get into a Law School, because I want to become a lawyer. I have chosen the business field of law. Meaning, my target is to become a Corporate Lawyer. Now, I have explained my goal of life, now let me slowly get to the problem so you guys can understand. I chose to be a Lawyer because I always wanted wealth in my future (Not that I'm a greedy fucker or anything, I always give money to those who need) it's just because I want to have a great life in the future. I am still young, I still have more time to decide but since I have one year left to decide my course in the university, I am beginning to panic now. Why? because, now I don't really see myself as the Lawyer anymore but I see myself in the Police field. Not a patrol police or anything, but I was thinking maybe Forensics or any kind of Detective (I don't know what else to call it but I think you get it). So now the problem is which way should I go? I mean I know it's about me and what I want and I can't have anyone decide on what choices I should make but I just need an opinion. I still want wealth in my life (I don't care about reputation or anything like that) and as you know, people police don't make a lot of money, just decent enough. I don't think I would hate being a lawyer but I'm just scared because what if I don't like it.

So if you were in my shoes right now, what would you do? I understand this depends on me, it's just that I've been under depression a lot and now I have this on my mind and I need to clear it real quick.
#108567 to #108443 - anon (12/24/2013) [-]
Im just going to say that my original intention was to go to law school. I found the classes to be boring when I got to college. Now, Im a semester away from being a history teacher, which when I think about it, is what I always wanted to do and I just wanted to law for the money. Its a career and a learning experience that requires a lot of commitment. Just wanting the money isnt enough for most people to put so much effort into something they dont particularly like.
User avatar #108593 to #108567 - mentlgen (12/24/2013) [-]

Mate, I want to become a lawyer because of the money in it, but I love history and I'm really good at teaching other student in my class what the fuck the teacher is saying to them in a much more basic way. WHY ARE YOU ON THIS SHITHOLE WEBSITE IN THE FUTURE?!
User avatar #108450 to #108443 - fickenjudes (12/23/2013) [-]
i guess i kinda relate to you, cause im 17 also and taking some administration of justices classes since 10th grade and this years class counts as a college course, and i think our teacher (ex patrol police officer and FBI ) and guest speakers told us info on lawyers and forensics and stuff [ i shoiuld have paid more attention haha] , anyways im thinking you should go to university ^^ in case something doesnt work out, you have a degree and also so you can get promoted faster, so degree
User avatar #108505 to #108450 - ilikethisusername ONLINE (12/23/2013) [-]
well yeah, I'm planning to go to university no matter what. but i was just confused whether to be a lawyer or go into police. i want both but i was police mostly but then again lawyers make much more money and I want my future to be great.
User avatar #108508 to #108505 - fickenjudes (12/23/2013) [-]
ohh so this is were some info i heard comes in, lawyers arent like the one you see in the movies all the time, like only 10% i think go to courts, the other 90% do papers and stuff, also to be one of those rich criminal lawyers, the chances of that are really low. but depends which lawyer you want to be,
User avatar #108509 to #108508 - ilikethisusername ONLINE (12/23/2013) [-]
yeah, i've worked for a lawyer as a co-op student. it's usually just papers and notarizing and whatnot. i was going for a corporate lawyer or business lawyer, you can say. but i'm that type of a guy who likes changes in my life, i don't like to stick into one place. i like to see changes and i love working with mystery.
User avatar #108511 to #108509 - fickenjudes (12/23/2013) [-]
well i dont know, i dont know if you can move from places while being a lawyer, personally i want to go into a government job like customs or border patrol or something where theres at least some action, i get a gun and benefits and dont have to work that much like my father does
User avatar #108512 to #108511 - ilikethisusername ONLINE (12/23/2013) [-]
if you want some action involved, then why didn't you pick the military?
User avatar #108513 to #108512 - fickenjudes (12/23/2013) [-]
well its one of my options
User avatar #108514 to #108513 - ilikethisusername ONLINE (12/23/2013) [-]
yeah. well thanks for the advice. i really needed it
User avatar #108515 to #108514 - fickenjudes (12/23/2013) [-]
no problem ^^
User avatar #108446 to #108443 - advicedude (12/23/2013) [-]
Do what you want, not the money.
User avatar #108507 to #108446 - ilikethisusername ONLINE (12/23/2013) [-]
that's true too. what about you? what do you want to be in life? i'm just asking, since your name is "advicedude" and you spent most of the time browsing the advice board. I'm guessing a psychiatrist or maybe a doctor? sorry i understand it's none of my business, but i just wanted to ask.
User avatar #108594 to #108507 - advicedude (12/24/2013) [-]
Took a course in AP psych and have always had a philosophic mindset. I'm going into computer science/software engineering because I've always liked tampering with computers and aspiring to write my own code from playing Roblox as a child. Also the pay is well for something that wouldn't be considered a "job". I've lived by the saying "Don't look for a job, find a career" and "If you like what you do, you don't work a day in your life."
User avatar #108607 to #108594 - ilikethisusername ONLINE (12/24/2013) [-]
well apparently my dad is telling me to stay on track to go to law school and i hate to argue with him because if someone argues with him, he gets mad and his BP gets high. i'm always scared of him and i'm now trying to explain to him about the police career, but he just keeps saying, "if you go to law school its so much better, police just wanders around and shit". So i don't really know what to do now.
User avatar #108637 to #108607 - advicedude (12/24/2013) [-]
He just has a misunderstanding of a police-man's work. I find them quite respectable (except for the crooked ones). Ultimately, once you're of age, let your family know you are an adult and you feel it is right for you to learn. They should accept if you deliver it lightly but if they say no and won't pay for college, I'd just go to law school, do well, and go do whatever you want after you're out.
User avatar #108444 to #108443 - ilikethisusername ONLINE (12/23/2013) [-]
people in police don't make a lot of money, they just make decent enough*
User avatar #108421 - mcderper (12/23/2013) [-]
How the fuck do you get to the sfw random board??
User avatar #108466 to #108421 - feelythefeel (12/23/2013) [-]
I ate oranges and it was k.
User avatar #108472 to #108466 - mcderper (12/23/2013) [-]
I nom ham was yum
User avatar #108429 to #108421 - philliyoMLB ONLINE (12/23/2013) [-]
It's titled "Brony"
User avatar #108408 - heraske ONLINE (12/23/2013) [-]
Be me, 2 years in depression
>First chick I ask out, rejected
>Second chick is cyberrelationship, which now she hates me, for almost 2 years now
>third chick lied to, but still am friends with her (only person who actually talks to me really)
>fourth chick keeps putting me off (or whatever its called) then find out she was going for another guy after obvious statements which meant she liked me
>fifth chick, same deal
>Sick Metal concert, can't go, because of work
>Sick airsoft game, can't go, because of work
>Attempt drivers license, fail by 21 demerit points
>Second atttempt, 0 demerit points
>tfw no one to drive with, because, once again, life is cock blocking me.
>My car has no ABS, almost slide/drift by accident into a car because roads are icy as FUCK (I was blinded by the ice, which didn't reflect 'till I Got closer), and my wheels locked up, which meant I couldn't steer, so I had to drive straight to the left side, right past the car that was supposed to be going opposite direction. Sit at the curb on the left side, facing the wrong way waiting for oncoming vehicles to clear before driving across, feeling like the biggest dip shit ever, and getting glares by passing drivers.
>Depressed for 2 years, although I'm in denial, sometimes there's good times, but then it just strikes me.
>Last day of school before xmas break, playing scramble in history class. Enough people for 3 games of four people, I'm the odd man out. Decide to finish homework in class, then realize no one offered to include, despite the fact I always try to include, because not being included feels terrible
>Suicidal thoughts, though I wouldn't consider serious
>Every teacher thinks I'm a deadbeat or someshit it seems, though have an 87% average, and haven't missed a minute of a class unexcused. 0/0 days/absents.
>Joining the CAF reserves by end of school so I can get my mind off of other shit and work with people who'll make me effort and put in the same effort as me.
User avatar #108465 to #108408 - feelythefeel (12/23/2013) [-]
Just eat oranges. You'll be k.
User avatar #108440 to #108408 - dragondust (12/23/2013) [-]
It seems like life is always working and revolving around the individual but sometimes bad things just come and go like phases.
I am always terrified that I will get in an accident so I'm not about to say you have it easy, but just hang in there. Something good has to happen eventually.
#108412 to #108408 - heraske ONLINE (12/23/2013) [-]
Rough sketch of what happened.
User avatar #108413 to #108412 - heraske ONLINE (12/23/2013) [-]
I also was going downhill, and turned at about 25 KM/H. Vehicle is also standard. I was going way too fast. my dick is big enough to hit the brake pedal
User avatar #108410 to #108408 - awesomerninjathing (12/23/2013) [-]
maybe you're just over thinking things
User avatar #108418 to #108410 - iridium (12/23/2013) [-]
I second this.
User avatar #108398 - tyrano ONLINE (12/23/2013) [-]
I just finished a small fap so I went on tumblr and looked up a porn star. I clicked on one of her pictures and a new tab opened up. It was a government site that said i was looking at child porn. I was absolutely not looking at that. the site also knew my state and city and said i had to pay a $300 fine in a week. When I tried to exit a long list came up and said my files and data is now being tracked so i just turned the computer off. I'm so scared that this is real and how am i gonna explain this to my mom if it is real. I just need someone to reassure me that this was fake.
User avatar #108669 to #108398 - loveyameanish (12/24/2013) [-]
It's fake. If it only happens once, it's a prank. If it's reccuring, or locks up your computer, it's a virus. If you happen to have Norton, this is how to get rid of it. If not, this should reassure you that it's not legit and that it's fixable anyway:

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User avatar #108529 to #108398 - thefunnyside (12/23/2013) [-]
Relax, it's not a virus or anything. Any website can effortlessly track down your city and state. If your PC is working fine, then it's nothing. I've heard of this prank before. Relax man, nothings gonna happen.
User avatar #108467 to #108398 - feelythefeel (12/23/2013) [-]
Just eat oranges. You'll be k.
User avatar #108455 to #108398 - faithrider (12/23/2013) [-]
do not listen to the people saying that you can relax just because it is a fake. this really is a virus.
User avatar #108454 to #108398 - faithrider (12/23/2013) [-]
you have a virus. and that ones nasty, the only way i have heard to get rid of that one is to reinstall you operating system... it might be another way, but i work in computer repair, so i doubt it (my boss told me specifically about that one, saying specifically that that one does that and that is the only way he knew of to get rid of it as well...)
User avatar #108442 to #108398 - dragondust (12/23/2013) [-]
Yeah it's like everyone is saying, don't worry about it at all.
You most likely didin't get any viruses and there no way in hell it was legitimate.
User avatar #108406 to #108398 - iridium (12/23/2013) [-]
Completely fake.

You would never get sent something like that through the internet. And Child Pornography is a felony punishable by 5 to 40 years in prison in the US depending on severity, it's not something you can get out of by paying a 300$ fine.

Even if it was legitimately accusing you, they would require solid evidence, which, assuming you don't own any child porn, they can't arrest you without.
User avatar #108407 to #108406 - awesomerninjathing (12/23/2013) [-]
hell, if it was only a 300$ fine, I'd be doing it more often
User avatar #108404 to #108398 - awesomerninjathing (12/23/2013) [-]
you're fucked up bro jesus christ you're fucked m8e oh lord you're so fucked
User avatar #108401 to #108398 - MooseGnome (12/23/2013) [-]
Relax, it's fake. If it were serious, they wouldn't tell you over the computer and give you time to delete any other child porn you may have. Even if it were real, which it's not, you could prove that it's not a serious habit and it was one wrong click.
User avatar #108402 to #108401 - tyrano ONLINE (12/23/2013) [-]
that makes me feel a lot better.
User avatar #108399 to #108398 - TheGodamnBatman (12/23/2013) [-]
Is it on mac?
I read some stories recently that locked people's computers and wouldn't let them do anything else and the only thing on the screen was a virus that said something along the lines of:


[bullshit FBI seal]
User avatar #108400 to #108399 - TheGodamnBatman (12/23/2013) [-]
OH yeah forgot,thats not the exact message just an example of soemthing similar i read. I cant remember it exactly.
User avatar #108405 to #108400 - goodcheese (12/23/2013) [-]
yea i got it too. i can't close the damn thing though without doing the whole end task thing which also closes all my tabs of porn i had opened up.
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