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Latest users (5): braveblue, ilikelizards, ilikethisusername, sineztro, xXThatxOnexGuyXx, anonymous(19).
What do you think? Give us your opinion. Anonymous comments allowed.
#120424 - xxxsonic fanxxx (03/06/2014) [-]
hey everyone
User avatar #120411 - foxen (03/06/2014) [-]
Quick question. I just kinda came to terms with the fact that I am Gay, and I was wondering who I should tell if anyone. Is it something that certain people (like my best friend) deserve to know?

As of now I don't think I'll tell my parents. Homophobia to the max on that front. But I feel like my best friend (also a guy) deserves to know. I'm not attracted to him in that way, but I feel like it's wrong to hide it from him because we have slept in the same bed and stuff (we stayed at his parent's place, then went snowboarding). Any advice?
User avatar #120437 to #120411 - thekiwihacker ONLINE (03/06/2014) [-]
Make absolutely sure that he knows that you aren't attracted to him. It will put a fucking knife in your friendship. I'm not saying you shouldn't tell him, but you need to be careful of how you let him know. If he thinks you're coming on to him, he'll most likely want nothing more to do with you
User avatar #120421 to #120411 - watermelloon (03/06/2014) [-]
Just tell them all strait up. I am bisexual and honestly, its better to just get it over with rather than dwelling on the fact you may loose some friends or get in trouble.
*An easy way is just a Facebook status.*
You can tell your bestie privately at first, tell him your not sexually attracted to him and just want to be friends. Expect questions from everyone like "How long have you been gay" "do you like me" "do you like girls at all?" "do you like boobs still" "what did your parents say" "Why?!" ETC ... you may even find some dude friends act weird around you at first, but I assure you they'll get over it and regain trust with you and the fact your not going to try anything.
I'm afraid I cant give any advice on the parental part, as my mother has always been accepting of homosexuality.
User avatar #120418 to #120411 - iridium (03/06/2014) [-]
Is your friend homophobic?
User avatar #120416 to #120411 - ipostcp (03/06/2014) [-]
Time and a place for everything. Don't rush it obviously.
#120404 - nonbenderinlife (03/06/2014) [-]
Hello there fellow funnyjunker's. Recently i started college (I missed the first semester because of various reasons) and every night homesickness hits me. Every single night i catch myself crying over how i miss my mother and my whole family in general. I live 6 hours away from my hometown and transportation isnt the best option. I've read about homesickness on the internet and they just tell you to forget and keep yourself occupied. The thing is, having missed the first semester its really hard to make friends since they're all in a closed circle and being the beta fag i am i cant really go up to someone and say "hey wanna be friends?". Do you have any advice for me and if you do it will be much appreciated aside the content of it.
User avatar #120410 to #120404 - thekiwihacker ONLINE (03/06/2014) [-]
I've also started university. I am also living away from home for the first time in my life. And I am loving this shit. Seriously. Its awesome. You've got all these options. You can do whatever you want. Don't get upset about not seeing your parents. Fucking skype call them. Send them a letter or an email. Don't be a pussy about it. Also on the friends front. Being beta doesn't have to stop you. When the lecturer asks the room a question, shout out something humerous. If you can't manage that, just fucking talk to someone. You don't have to get right in their social circle right away. Just start talking to people. Once you've made a friend, they'll bring you into their circle of friends and then you'll have even more friends
User avatar #120414 to #120410 - mtbmoosey (03/06/2014) [-]
This^^
I just made a new friend in my photography class because i don't have the nuts to yell out funny stuff to the whole class, so I just whisper them to her (Originally just whispered them to myself but she heard a few and laughed, so I started whispering them to her) and we have fun, and now we are partners for projects, and are pretty good friends. Plus I still skype my parents most weekends, we have a family text chat, stuff like that.
#120417 to #120414 - thekiwihacker ONLINE (03/06/2014) [-]
That too. I've got this girl who is already my friend, but we sit next to each other in most lectures and I always say funny shit (I'm kinda the class clown) and she can't get enough. Bitches love a funny guy.
That too. I've got this girl who is already my friend, but we sit next to each other in most lectures and I always say funny shit (I'm kinda the class clown) and she can't get enough. Bitches love a funny guy.
User avatar #120408 to #120404 - mtbmoosey (03/06/2014) [-]
I used to suffer from homesickness when I got to college. But it only lasted till my parents came to visit after 2 months. It was good to see my parents, but being independent is sooo much more fun. Wake up at like noon or something, and eat some cake for breakfast, and realize you can do anything you want. I went home over summer (Shattered my collar bone right before finals, so I went home for a few months to recover and take time off) and was soooo excited to come back to school.

I guess what I'm saying is there's nothing you can really do about it. Just keep going and really try your hardest to make friends. I suck at it too, but I'd just try my hardest to talk to people, and in a few cases it worked out. Just be yourself, not everyone will like you, but there's so many people at college that someone will, and the people that don't like you, you won't ever see them. But either way, you'll grow out of it. It took me 2 months to get over it, My mum says it took her about a semester, apparently my brother had it for a few months.

Just hang in there lil nigga. Everythings gunna be okay.
User avatar #120405 to #120404 - Leonidus (03/06/2014) [-]
Its really easy to make friends in college. Literally all you need to do is ask the people sitting next to you if they want to study for the upcoming exam in the library together. Boom, you'll study with them for the rest of the semester then will become friends.

ProTip: if you have a discussion section or lab or some smaller class with people in there, ask those people rather than people in lecture.
User avatar #120409 to #120405 - Leonidus (03/06/2014) [-]
Also, if you identify with a certain ethnicity, go to the student center, or student life or some shit like that and ask if there is a club on campus that you could identify with.

It actually doesnt have to be an ethnic club either. At my college there is skate club for skateboarders, surf club, "Gaming Guild", dance clubs, DJ club, anything you can really relate to or like.
#120402 - xxxsonic fanxxx (03/06/2014) [-]
**anonymous rolled a random image posted in comment #3 at Ah yes the Gingers **   
   
What do I do about   
                             <---
**anonymous rolled a random image posted in comment #3 at Ah yes the Gingers **

What do I do about
<---
#120394 - xxxsonic fanxxx (03/06/2014) [-]
If there was a level beyond depressed, i'd have passed that ages ago. Holy hell, i'm just so freaking low. Everything about my life brings me down. I can't even get help because i'm so mentally fucked that i won't let me get help. I've tried offing myself so many times...but...I just won't die. Sometimes i wish i was a normal person like everyone else, with people i could talk to, but i can't. I didn't even want to type this out because it makes me feel like a whiny teenager and then i hate myself even more. My family hates me and fears me more than anything. My friends don't care about me, or how i feel. There's no one in the world who needs me. No one who wouldn't get over me being gone in a flash. I feel worse every day. I couldn't even go to class the past two days. I just slept in my car because i didn't have the energy to go. I can't even cry. I'm just so broken.  So. So. Broken.
If there was a level beyond depressed, i'd have passed that ages ago. Holy hell, i'm just so freaking low. Everything about my life brings me down. I can't even get help because i'm so mentally fucked that i won't let me get help. I've tried offing myself so many times...but...I just won't die. Sometimes i wish i was a normal person like everyone else, with people i could talk to, but i can't. I didn't even want to type this out because it makes me feel like a whiny teenager and then i hate myself even more. My family hates me and fears me more than anything. My friends don't care about me, or how i feel. There's no one in the world who needs me. No one who wouldn't get over me being gone in a flash. I feel worse every day. I couldn't even go to class the past two days. I just slept in my car because i didn't have the energy to go. I can't even cry. I'm just so broken. So. So. Broken.
User avatar #120502 to #120394 - toastersburnthings (03/06/2014) [-]
Ask for a prescription for Lithium or Valproic Acid, don't take no for an answer
Just think right now, there's no possible way it could get worse than it already is as a result of taking them, right? Valproic Acid will actually increase neural plasticity as well, so while you're picking yourself up, you can learn a shitton of everything about everything along the way, and retrain your mind so it won't get so fucked up again.
#120629 to #120502 - xxxsonic fanxxx (03/06/2014) [-]
I'm really against taking pills. I've always had this worry that once i start taking them, i'll become someone different, and i'll lose everything that made me me. What makes these better than the rest?
User avatar #120639 to #120629 - toastersburnthings (03/06/2014) [-]
Well, just that. By increasing plasticity in your brain, you're activating the same stuff that built your personality when you were young. You won't lose what makes you who you are, but you can build upon it and make yourself more resistant to shit like depression.
#120407 to #120394 - thekiwihacker ONLINE (03/06/2014) [-]
Alright man. I'm not going to presume to know shit about your life. Or even about depression. I know I've gone through periods where I've felt depressed, and at the time I thought that no one could know what this was like. With a bit of maturity I realised that it was nothing to actual clinical depression. I don't know what will help you. I can't tell you that everything will be ok, or that I'm there for you. I don't know shit about your life.

Does that make you feel better? Because I'd be very surprised if it did. Hell, I'm just a guy sitting here, hoping that because I've got my life fairly together it makes me qualified to tell you how to fix yours. I don't even know what you're question is. You've just told us all how crap your life is without actually saying that you want to fix it. Do you want to fix it? Or would you rather end it. Cuz I'd say that would be a bad idea. I'm an atheist. There's no heaven or hell. No divine retribution. If you kill yourself then you end everything that you are and everything that you could have been. You would make the world lesser and smaller by removing yourself from it. If your family hates you, then leave. Move on. Go somewhere new, make new friends, invent a new life for yourself.
#120628 to #120407 - xxxsonic fanxxx (03/06/2014) [-]
I thought that leaving would solve my problem, still do, but the moment i tried, my mother used my sisters against me, saying they won't sleep until i get home. I honestly did not care, but it was just so unfair to them that they had to suffer because i wanted out. I went back around 3 in the morning, and everyone was asleep in their rooms. The next morning everyone acted like nothing happened. They even still threaten to kick me out of the house.
Fuck damnation and fuck redemption. I've wanted to cease existing for as long as i can remember, there was only one good thing iv'e ever done in life, and everything else just turned to ruin. I know what i'm going to be if i stay here, and i've tried so hard to change it.
i'm still open to advice, since you seem to have your life in more order than i do/
User avatar #120644 to #120628 - thekiwihacker ONLINE (03/07/2014) [-]
Look bro, I can't tell you how to deal with your family. But it seems to me like they're treating you like shit. If you think you can get away, then go. They obviously aren't on your side. So fucking what if they go without sleep for a while? What's going to happen? You're sitting there, feeling depressed and getting no help from them.

A thought just occurred to me: How old are you. Because that could make this the difference between being a whiny little bitch and a real fucking problem. No joke. If you're a depressed 15 year old, my stance is that you're literally not qualified to feel that shit, regardless of brain function. However, if you're in your early twenties, for example, and you have clinical depression, in that case I'd say you do need help and you should make a move to get away from your parents.
#120649 to #120644 - xxxsonic fanxxx (03/07/2014) [-]
20. I'm going to get help. I set up an appointment for tomorrow. As for leaving, i'm gonna save up some money again (they took the few hundred i saved up) and get out as soon as i can.
User avatar #120659 to #120649 - thekiwihacker ONLINE (03/07/2014) [-]
Good stuff man. But a single therapy session isn't going to make you all that much better. What you need to do is make a plan. Pick a destination, make sure you can make it there. Try and arrange accommodation and work in advance. You think you're depressed now? It'll be ten times worse if you're jobless and homeless.

Once you get to wherever you're going, go to some sort of regular therapy sessions. You want to have some structure in your life. Something meaningful that you can look forward to each week or whatever. Eat healthy, maybe go for a run every couple of days. It helps when you need to think things through and stay positive.
User avatar #120396 to #120394 - soundofwinter ONLINE (03/06/2014) [-]
You should look into therapy and get something prescribed
#120399 to #120396 - xxxsonic fanxxx (03/06/2014) [-]
I was prescribed some extreme anxiety medicine and depression pills. I haven't taken them, people tell me i need them, and i mostly agree, but my body won't let me take them.
User avatar #120400 to #120399 - soundofwinter ONLINE (03/06/2014) [-]
What does that mean? Do you vomit them up?
#120624 to #120400 - xxxsonic fanxxx (03/06/2014) [-]
I know this is going to sound stupid, but i've got these voices in my head that stop me from doing anything that'll help me. Whenever i try and get help, i suddenly get horrible migraines.
User avatar #120630 to #120624 - soundofwinter ONLINE (03/06/2014) [-]
Sounds like some form of placebo effect. I suppose you could try to obtain some Sudafed to alleviate the headache and give you some energy to take the meds initially
#120632 to #120630 - xxxsonic fanxxx (03/06/2014) [-]
I'm setting up an appointment tomorrow. Thanks for taking the time to help me out, guys.
User avatar #120633 to #120632 - soundofwinter ONLINE (03/06/2014) [-]
You got this lil nigga
#120377 - Karibookiller ONLINE (03/06/2014) [-]
Should I keep my mullet?
User avatar #120569 to #120377 - meter (03/06/2014) [-]
that shit is ugly as hell
get a shave
User avatar #120419 to #120377 - iridium (03/06/2014) [-]
You don't look like you keep your hair too tidy. I'd say get rid of it.
User avatar #120413 to #120377 - hyrulist (03/06/2014) [-]
get rid of it

please
User avatar #120398 to #120377 - soundofwinter ONLINE (03/06/2014) [-]
Not unless you're the frontman of an 80s southern rock band
User avatar #120391 to #120377 - urinarytractinfect (03/06/2014) [-]
if u live in the usa. NO!
User avatar #120392 to #120391 - Karibookiller ONLINE (03/06/2014) [-]
Of course I live in the US, I'd be castrated anywhere else.
User avatar #120393 to #120392 - urinarytractinfect (03/06/2014) [-]
leave me alone
User avatar #120380 to #120377 - alecbaldwinning ONLINE (03/06/2014) [-]
hahahahahahahahahahahaha
#120378 to #120377 - mattwithnonumbers ONLINE (03/06/2014) [-]
NO!!!
User avatar #120364 - silverzepher (03/06/2014) [-]
any of you have questions about hotels?
like what actually happens behind the scenes when they have no one in house, or how much that room you got from "insert travel website here" cost them, or things like that?
i only have my current(soon to be former) job to base it off of, and it might not be the same every where, but i can tell you about mine.
User avatar #120874 to #120364 - sauditwo (03/08/2014) [-]
how often does shit get stolen from the rooms
and are they actually allowed to kick someone out if he or she is being noisy as fuck
User avatar #120892 to #120874 - silverzepher (03/08/2014) [-]
not as often as you think, then again, we aren't as big as hampton, so we don't have silk sheets or satin pillow covers.

and yes we can kick you for being noisy, if you are causing a disturbance to other guests we will warn you, i will call my manager, they will say warn them again, and if they don't stop call them and say a guest has called the police and then call us so we can call the police for you(it makes sure that i don't get blamed for wrongly kicking guests, or getting someone arrested)
User avatar #120898 to #120892 - sauditwo (03/08/2014) [-]
another quick question
maybe not so related to hotels
but usually there are the small bottles of alcoholic stuff
is there a place you get that stuff
or is that just sold everywhere?
User avatar #120902 to #120898 - silverzepher (03/08/2014) [-]
this hotel is owned by indians(the dot kind) so we don't stock booze, but you could try sam's club, they would have it in bulk, and walmart will sell some brands in small bottles, other than that none that i wouldn't know
User avatar #120903 to #120902 - sauditwo (03/08/2014) [-]
nah man
i'm a saudi that lives in saudi
i barely even drink
alcohol is illegal here anyway
i only know from holidays and stuff
i just always find them interesting
User avatar #120904 to #120903 - silverzepher (03/08/2014) [-]
but ya, i don't deal with stock so i wouldn't really know where they get anything but the fruit.
User avatar #120899 to #120898 - sauditwo (03/08/2014) [-]
like the tiny bottles in the mini fridge
User avatar #120406 to #120364 - Leonidus (03/06/2014) [-]
what about soiled bedsheets?
User avatar #120412 to #120406 - silverzepher (03/06/2014) [-]
what about them, we find everything from fleas, to bed bugs, splooge, blood, leftover food.
User avatar #120713 to #120412 - Leonidus (03/07/2014) [-]
I meant like, whats the procedure if you find like semen stains or vaginal fluids? Charge the guests or just forget about it and throw it in the wash?

I may or may not be asking because I may or may not have done this over the weekend
User avatar #120716 to #120713 - silverzepher (03/07/2014) [-]
normally we don't care, unless you destroyed the sheet, and even then we don't like to charge because you can say it was like that before you got in the room. but we take the sheets and bleach the shit out of them anyways.
User avatar #120366 to #120364 - advicedude (03/06/2014) [-]
tell us the interesting bits.
User avatar #120369 to #120366 - silverzepher (03/06/2014) [-]
well it all depends on what you call interesting. like the gun scare a couple of weeks ago, the goings on of the staff, the food you get served at breakfast, what do you want to know
User avatar #120370 to #120369 - advicedude (03/06/2014) [-]
Top 5 occurrences / facts
User avatar #120388 to #120370 - silverzepher (03/06/2014) [-]
facts would seem better suited through my experiences/
1. my franchise doesn't send people to check things that often, so we can get away with shit that shouldn't fly. like the breakfast we serve, the "eggs" come in bags, we don't cook them, we microwave them, the sausage are jimmy dean breakfast sausage(microwaved), the steamer isn't set to any real temp, they just turn it until the light comes on. the sausage can be up to 2 days old, same with the eggs. the milk will be used past the exp date because the breakfast "staff" are ordered to pour it into the new jug. the bread might not be as fresh as you would think. if you really must eat breakfast you are better off with oatmeal(Quaker Oats) made with water, fruit, and juice from the machine(if it tastes watered down it is)

2.we will lie to you. i can make a room 20% off in the off season(once the owner unlocks the rate), we do know how much the site paid for your room, winter they pay about $65-75 a night, you will pay ~80 through them. in the summer they will charge you ~$110, and pay us $70-80, but if we are down to our last few rooms the price might be as high as $210, for a single king size. operating cost is 27+change per room according to corporate.

3. there is so much damage in a hotel that doesn't get fixed simply because no one complains, or gets hurt, or the fact that the owner doesn't want to shell out the money for it. the total cost to franchise in total investment for this company is ~14.5mil, on a 10-20 year contract. that comes out to about $750000, he makes a 1mil every year, so he makes after total investment he has $250000. he just doesn't want to fix it.

4. teen girls have the run of the hotel, simply for the fact that mainly men work on the weekends at the hotel, and we don;t want to be fired because of some pissy little girl says we touched them.

5.the biggest cash drop i had was 799.99, in cash,in authorizations i had taken about $20000.
User avatar #120647 to #120388 - advicedude (03/07/2014) [-]
Yeah why don't hotels invest in actual fucking eggs. Damn.
User avatar #120699 to #120647 - silverzepher (03/07/2014) [-]
cheaper not to, oh and the hard boiled eggs are keep for months, i wouldn't eat one to save my fucking life.
User avatar #120726 to #120699 - advicedude (03/07/2014) [-]
I know it's cheaper but if people were happier with their breakfast, they'd stay there more. I've never been satisfied from a hotel breakfast ever.
User avatar #120727 to #120726 - silverzepher (03/07/2014) [-]
the desk staff knows that, but the owner makes the call, not us. do you know how often i am yelled at because of stuff i can't do because i would get fired because i helped someone?
User avatar #120728 to #120727 - advicedude (03/07/2014) [-]
That's sad
User avatar #120732 to #120728 - silverzepher (03/07/2014) [-]
i get yelled at by customers because i can't do anything in group bookings(the owner and the front desk manager are the only ones allowed to touch groups), i get yelled at by management because they get complaints that i can't do anything in group bookings, i get yelled at because i have a different price than what a customer sees online, i get yelled at for selling rooms with the rate i am told to use on the weekend because i will sell 8-10 rooms a night and no one wants to pay $100 a night in the winter. it's fucked up.
User avatar #120365 to #120364 - awesomerninjathing (03/06/2014) [-]
do you watch people fucking
User avatar #120367 to #120365 - silverzepher (03/06/2014) [-]
as a franchise hotel that has a minimum standard, no. some of the rattier one do, but those are mainly local "mom and pop's" than big chains. i have heard a few going at it, and i have talked to a naked woman on the phone though.
User avatar #120371 to #120367 - awesomerninjathing (03/06/2014) [-]
how did that conversation go?
User avatar #120374 to #120371 - silverzepher (03/06/2014) [-]
as a clerk it is my job to do courtesy calls, well she got a hot tub room. so i call for my call and i get told i caught her while she was in the tub. nothing special, i mean if i would have been asked if i wanted to join i wouldn't have hesitated to run up the stairs in my birthday suit, but she didn't. i'm not some hero, i don't just randomly shag guests, and i don't often get the chance to either.
#120350 - xxxsonic fanxxx (03/06/2014) [-]
Hey guys. I have a question. Can a super fat landwhale get a girlfriend. not a super model, but a nice cute girl. is this physically possible. how so? can a woman be attracted to this type of person? why?
Posting as anon to save face
User avatar #120420 to #120350 - iridium (03/06/2014) [-]
Short answer, Yes.

long answer, see >>120390
#120390 to #120350 - thekiwihacker ONLINE (03/06/2014) [-]
There is no excuse for being overweight. Having a pre-existing condition means that you have to work harder than everyone else, but there is no reason that everyone shouldn't be inside of a healthy weight range. Get off your ass and go hiking. Once that's easy, start jogging. Get a bike. Get a treadmill. Get a rowing machine. GET OFF YOUR ASS. Eat healthy. Cut out the shit food. From here on, right now, you're going to listen to what I say. Are you listening? These are the rules for you for the next 12 months:   
Eat at home. You don't go out for a burger, or chips, or fucking sushi. If you suck at cooking, take an adult cooking class. Breakfast is either a REASONABLE portion of, say, bacon and eggs (that means no more than two eggs, and no more than 3 normal sized rashers of bacon). This is a fucking treat. You have that once a week when you've been for a really good run that morning. The rest of the week, its a small portion of high fibre cereal. I don't care if you're hungry. That's a good thing. Two closed sandwiches for lunch, with a REASONABLE amount of filling. Dinner is a small portion of meat, a small portion of carbs (i.e. potato, rice, etc) and a large portion of salad. WITHOUT THE SALAD DRESSING LARDASS. If you have to have something on it, put some damn lemon juice on there.   
   
Workout. Every damn day. You don't have to spend all day at the gym. Its simple stuff. go for a twenty minute jog. If you're not puffing after 2 minutes, you're not working hard enough. Bike rides are good. Make sure you're pushing yourself. A kilometre should take you less than 3 minutes, unless you're going uphill. Swim. Swimming is awesome. 10 lengths of a 25 metre pool is great.   
   
Are you paying attention? Follow this advice, and you'll turn your whole fucking life around. Ignore me, and you'll stay fat. Its that simple. If you're going to start this, you fucking commit. You don't get to stop this for 12 months. Understand? Now fucking get going
There is no excuse for being overweight. Having a pre-existing condition means that you have to work harder than everyone else, but there is no reason that everyone shouldn't be inside of a healthy weight range. Get off your ass and go hiking. Once that's easy, start jogging. Get a bike. Get a treadmill. Get a rowing machine. GET OFF YOUR ASS. Eat healthy. Cut out the shit food. From here on, right now, you're going to listen to what I say. Are you listening? These are the rules for you for the next 12 months:
Eat at home. You don't go out for a burger, or chips, or fucking sushi. If you suck at cooking, take an adult cooking class. Breakfast is either a REASONABLE portion of, say, bacon and eggs (that means no more than two eggs, and no more than 3 normal sized rashers of bacon). This is a fucking treat. You have that once a week when you've been for a really good run that morning. The rest of the week, its a small portion of high fibre cereal. I don't care if you're hungry. That's a good thing. Two closed sandwiches for lunch, with a REASONABLE amount of filling. Dinner is a small portion of meat, a small portion of carbs (i.e. potato, rice, etc) and a large portion of salad. WITHOUT THE SALAD DRESSING LARDASS. If you have to have something on it, put some damn lemon juice on there.

Workout. Every damn day. You don't have to spend all day at the gym. Its simple stuff. go for a twenty minute jog. If you're not puffing after 2 minutes, you're not working hard enough. Bike rides are good. Make sure you're pushing yourself. A kilometre should take you less than 3 minutes, unless you're going uphill. Swim. Swimming is awesome. 10 lengths of a 25 metre pool is great.

Are you paying attention? Follow this advice, and you'll turn your whole fucking life around. Ignore me, and you'll stay fat. Its that simple. If you're going to start this, you fucking commit. You don't get to stop this for 12 months. Understand? Now fucking get going
#120395 to #120390 - thorseph (03/06/2014) [-]
imma just sceenshot this and save it for when i'm portioning out meals when i live alone, that might be a while...
#120403 to #120395 - thekiwihacker ONLINE (03/06/2014) [-]
I'm just saying, being fit and healthy is a lot more involved than just "do this diet and go to this gym", but its also a lot easier than most people think. Willpower is all it takes. Like, I'm sitting here with a chocolate bar. A decent sized one. Its one of those cadbury 220g motherfuckers. I've eaten half of it today. Should I feel bad about that? No. Do you know why? Because I'm sitting right in the middle of the healthy zone for my weight and height. Because today I swam 250 meters, biked almost 8km and then jogged 8 km home because my damn bike got a flat tyre. I think I've fucking earned a bit of chocolate. Until you're in the same situation as me. Until you've reached your optimal weight and you're exercising regularly, I would suggest that you PUT DOWN THE CANDY, AND GET OUTSIDE AND EXERCISE!!
#120521 to #120403 - thorseph (03/06/2014) [-]
i'm about 245lbs at 6'3" that's almost normal, a little above average i think, but not obesse, i just wanna lose the belly roll
User avatar #120641 to #120521 - thekiwihacker ONLINE (03/06/2014) [-]
See? That's fine. As long as you keep working at it, and don't eat stupidly, its fine to have a little binge every once in a while. No more than once a month though, and its gotta be a reasonably small binge, but otherwise you're gold.
#120642 to #120641 - thorseph (03/07/2014) [-]
yeah but i've always just naturally been this no matter what i eat, i want to be thinner, but i know i'm at a reasonable weight as well...
User avatar #120643 to #120642 - thekiwihacker ONLINE (03/07/2014) [-]
If you want to be thinner, its simple. Kill the batman. And do an hour of cardio every day. Decrease your potion sizes at meals, but not dramatically. That's pretty much all there is to it
User avatar #120368 to #120350 - advicedude (03/06/2014) [-]
Personality and money.
#120361 to #120350 - xxxsonic fanxxx (03/06/2014) [-]
Well, the thing is. i allow my low self-esteem that comes from my excess amount of fat to prevent me from forming meaningful relationships with people, especially women. And while this girl from what i can tell is flirty with me. i cannot get passed this mental block in my head about my weight. and while i never talk about it save for when it is a problem, and have taken steps to lose weight such as working out and lifting. I'm just not sure how to go about this. I think about her a little bit and have had normal conversations with her ad she seems to like me, but it doesn't make scence to me because of my current physical condition. I just dont know guys.
Once again anon.
#120354 to #120350 - mattwithnonumbers ONLINE (03/06/2014) [-]
sure you can, but you'll need to find someone who isn't shallow and if your not willing to date someone your own size than that kinda makes you shallow... this in effect may prevent you from staying in a relationship with said unshallow person.
#120351 to #120350 - awesomerninjathing (03/06/2014) [-]
this guy got her and I think like 2 other girls

you just need to be funny or some shit because that's what this guy did
User avatar #120355 to #120351 - bonerjam (03/06/2014) [-]
you cant automatically become seth rogen thats not how it works.
User avatar #120359 to #120355 - awesomerninjathing (03/06/2014) [-]
not with that attitude lil nigga
User avatar #120348 - blackkid (03/06/2014) [-]
Guys, I've got a real whopper. This girl I met, almost three years ago now... She was perfect. Literally everything I've ever wanted in a girl. Black hair, blue eyes, 8/10 face, 10/10 body, loves (good) video games, super heroes, minecraft, WoW, and more than anything else, Mortal Kombat. It was our special thing, it was there from the beginning. We hit it off so fast. We were official in 3 days, and we were so close, and always had so much fun. I didn't see her very often, because her mom had cancer, and she had 2 horses and 5 dogs to tend to. That didn't bother me much but, I still loved every second I was with her. We were so close, and we spent a ton of time together, had so many inside jokes, but things had been getting more distant over time, and after 2 years of dating her, she calls me one day, and says, "Hey, my mom is really sick right now, I'm taking her to the hospital. Just know that I'll be in and out of contact." I told her I loved her, and that she can come to me for literally anything, food, money, love, someone to talk to, rides, anything. I told her that me and my whole family were behind her. Little did I know that this was a ploy. She spent this time to go to a cabin with a dude she just met. She got drunk and fucked him. We lost our virginities to each other, and it was a big deal, she was scared but I told her how much I loved her, and I really did, and she eventually let go. Well when I find this news out I can't eat for four days, I can't sleep, I die every second of every day for months afterword. Every happy memory for the past two years hurt to think about. Guys, I can't do it. It happened July of last year, and every day I think about her, and every day I hurt. I hurt so much. Please help me. Help me get out of this. I just want to feel like I did when I was with her again.
#120397 to #120348 - thorseph (03/06/2014) [-]
can't say i understand, cause i don't, but i had a girl and she was about the same thing that you are talking about, however i was younger then and i probably just got into a lot of the stuff she did cause i thought she was cute. I did get to know her, and that was important, i have never had an emotional bond like that with anyone else, and i have never had sex with this woman, having known her for 6 years i still wish to marry her, i got blackmailed by a friend that wanted me, and she flung herself into the arms of another... i think about her less, but she still says she loves me, confides in me, tells me everything. it's so bloody hard to move on, i haven't been able to and admitting how i feel hasn't helped much, it's a long road bro, and it's different for everyone, good luck, it's the most i can do.
User avatar #120389 to #120348 - Jovierik (03/06/2014) [-]
hey, weve all had relationships, some of us have been thru the same things. one thing you cant do is beat yourself over it. you know, the time you had with her were probably special, and meant a lot. she may be a nice girl, she sounds like one, but you know what fuck her. fuck that girl man. she left, she isnt worth it.

the hardest part is going to be getting over it, its gonna hurt, espicially since you shared a deep connection with her. the pain is going to feel worse at times, and memories will flood back and hit you like a fucking truck. But the future is beautiful. look out the window man, its sunny every day. what you gotta do is get up and just keep your mind as best you can intact.

it sucks telling you this, cause i was in the same position and the advice i got is true, it takes time. and most of the time, its a long time, but dont feel so bad, you just gotta put yourself first now. not her, or how it was with her.

sometimes it hurts, itll hit you harder a certain day you know how it is. but once you get moving on and bettering yourself, itll hurt a little bit less. And then one day youre gonna wake up... and its not gonna hurt at all.
User avatar #120341 - advicedude (03/06/2014) [-]
I'm just gonna put it out there, unless you're a senior and have your shit figured out between you, highschool relationships are pretty lame. The social and sexual fun of it is nice but practically, not so much in my experience.
User avatar #120339 - mondominiman (03/06/2014) [-]
Can you brush your teeth the day you get a dental crown?
User avatar #120343 to #120339 - advicedude (03/06/2014) [-]
I'd advise not to.
User avatar #120334 - fuccthedevil (03/06/2014) [-]
My sister is basically neglecting my dogs while me, my mom and dad are at work. My Shi Tzu has matted fur because she doesn't brush him, and he's chewing the mats until he bleeds.

On top of that, they go 16 hours from the time I wake up and feed them (then go to bed), until I get home from work without eating.

It's making me sick to my stomach, and my sister (who is 18 years old) doesn't understand how important those dogs are to me.

She's a fucking lazy cunt who does nothing but sit around on her ass all day. She doesn't even clean the house while we're all gone trying to put food in her fat mouth.



My other sister has cerebral palsy and can't do anything about it.

What do I do, advice board? I'm crying. Worrying myself sick over my dogs.
#120347 to #120334 - mattwithnonumbers ONLINE (03/06/2014) [-]
sorry to be the bearer of bad news but you could be brushing your dogs instead of browsing the fucking internet
#120349 to #120347 - mattwithnonumbers ONLINE (03/06/2014) [-]
its easy to blame others for your problems but sometimes you just gotta buck up and deal with it yourself
User avatar #120353 to #120349 - fuccthedevil (03/06/2014) [-]
I didn't know it was getting this bad until my dog was gnawing on his tail until he bled. I then proceeded to cut the mattes out of this fur, and brush him to -attempt- to soothe him. But his skin is so irritated now. It's gonna be at least a week before I can take him to the vet.
User avatar #120352 to #120349 - fuccthedevil (03/06/2014) [-]
Look I understand where you're coming from, but you've got to understand that this girl is home 24/7.
#120356 to #120352 - mattwithnonumbers ONLINE (03/06/2014) [-]
sorry to say it man but all that means is that she needs to get a fucking job not take care of your dogs
User avatar #120358 to #120356 - fuccthedevil (03/06/2014) [-]
I could've elaborated more than I did. But I was upset when I typed that comment out. I had just finished soaking the dog in cool water for a bit while I brushed out his fur.
#120360 to #120358 - mattwithnonumbers ONLINE (03/06/2014) [-]
OK, but it sounds like we both know that your lazy ass sister is never going to do anything to help the dogs (besides occasionally feed them) because she'd rather sit around and watch twilight for the hundredth time. So... you know what you gotta do dude.
User avatar #120363 to #120360 - fuccthedevil (03/06/2014) [-]
I'm not a snitch, but the health of those dogs is kinda in my hands right now. My mom works 6pm to 6am with only one day off every week, and my dad works the same job from 6am to 6pm every day, with a different day off. My parents are never home at the same time.
User avatar #120362 to #120360 - fuccthedevil (03/06/2014) [-]
I'd probably go to prison if I smothered her in her sleep.
But you're thinking. Moving us in the right direction.

Oh wait. You were suggesting that I do the work myself.
Right. Right.

I mean, I'm probably just going to let my parents know what's going down. Because they won't have that shit. I can only do so much for them. My shifts are irregular, so I don't get much sleep. I can only try.

And no. She's a fucking weeaboo. Which is ten time worse than a Twilight fanatic.
#120372 to #120362 - mattwithnonumbers ONLINE (03/06/2014) [-]
No you had me right the first time.
oh.. well just get her to fantasize that the dogs are anime characters or some shit (jk.. unless she's a real wack job.. in which case, go for it).
Sounds like you got it under control though.. good luck dude
User avatar #120357 to #120356 - fuccthedevil (03/06/2014) [-]
They're family dogs. They just mean a lot to me.
To everyone really. Just not her apparently.
User avatar #120346 to #120334 - alecbaldwinning ONLINE (03/06/2014) [-]
If you live with your parents, and are unable to convince your cunt sister through conversation, just talk to your parents about it.
User avatar #120328 - urinarytractinfect (03/06/2014) [-]
who here has gid. how do u handle it? wuts ur strategy?
#120327 - deusexmachinase (03/06/2014) [-]
Hey guys I need some help, my best friends birthday is coming soon and I want to get him an old gift. I got him a Pokemon gold plated card but I feel like it would be better to get him something else as well. We've been friends since forever and I was wondering if you guys knew something that would bring that sense of nostalgia we all love (from the 90's would e best). (I know it's in the wrong section and I apologize in advance)

Thank you
User avatar #120337 to #120327 - advicedude (03/06/2014) [-]
actual gameboy color with pokemon
#120344 to #120337 - deusexmachinase (03/06/2014) [-]
He has a gameboy color with gold version. Thank you though
#120322 - swiggityswooty (03/06/2014) [-]
ok, im a freshman in highschool whos had like two "girlfriends" total in my life. im also a really good athelete, ive practically dedicated the last four years to wrestling, and track, and judo. my problem is with this girl. im not exactly sure because im a social retard, but i think shes kinda into me. shes hot and im kinda into her. the problem is that whenever i try to do anything even slightly flirtatious or romantic, i blank, and im left with retard brain. so far ive got by on jokes and shit, but i think shes thinking that i dont like her back, the fuck do i do?
#120658 to #120322 - swiggityswooty (03/07/2014) [-]
update, i just jerked off and realized i was just horny. gonna try to ask her out tho
User avatar #120342 to #120322 - fuccthedevil (03/06/2014) [-]
Don't worry about girls right now. Hang out with her and build a relationship as friends for a while.

Guys "friend zoning" girls doesn't negate the possibility of relationships. Just the other way around. Focus on school, become awesome as fuck. Because once you're out of school, that's when girls matter, man.

Take it from someone who dropped out of school to be with a girl only for her to dump him.

High school relationships are shit.
User avatar #120329 to #120322 - nommonsterbaa (03/06/2014) [-]
Sometimes it's better to look kind of like an idiot in seeming like you like her than to just not show it at all. As long as you don't come across as an absolutely unattractive person, just do whatever comes to mind as far as making it clear you like her. Be blunt if you must. Like the kiwihacker said, doing it online is a lot easier, but. Either works, I suppose. Just my experience, I'm a freshman in highschool as well.
#120324 to #120322 - thekiwihacker ONLINE (03/06/2014) [-]
If you can't do it in person, let her know how you feel online. It might seem beta as hell, but its better than nothing, and has worked for me in the past. Just send her a facebook message saying that you like her, insert a tonne of compliments, whether they're true or not, but sincerity is usually the best policy in this situation. Its easy enough to just get it out there that you like her, and then once that's said, you don't feel as worried when you're talking to her. She already knows you like her, so you won't feel like a fuckup when you're talking to her
User avatar #120318 - angelmitskano (03/06/2014) [-]
I feel like I might not be able to control myself anymore guys. I've always been a short tempered person, but for the past few months, I feel like it's gotten a lot worse. I usually just get angry and argue or just bitch about it to someone, but now I just don't say anything to anyone and I just think about it for a long time. In the last two months though I think it's reached the worst point. I literally sit around and think about hurting/killing people that have negatively affected me. And I find myself really going into detail. I try not to think these things but I just can't help myself. I've gotten really close to hurting people too. For example, I really despise my room mate, and last night she kept me up until 2 in the morning even though I begged her to let me sleep. When she finally went to bed, I was so angry and I kept thinking that I should just kill her. I have a knife in my room for when I cut oranges and I got up and held it for while, and I was seriously only thinking how long I had to escape by the time they found what I had done. I don't know what to do. I really try not to dwell on these things but when I get angry, I get a headache, and this headache has been with me for 6 days. No matter what I take the headache won't go away. I have literally been secluding myself so that people won't bother me but I can only do that for so long. And hurting people is all that's been on my mind. If I even look at some one that I don't like, my head throbs and I get this ache in my chest. How should I approach this? Who should I see first? Please help me.
#120325 to #120318 - thekiwihacker ONLINE (03/06/2014) [-]
Number one suggestion: get your ass to a therapist. Right fucking now. If you don't want to do that, then you're not serious about preventing harm to others and you're a sociopath. I'm not saying that's a terrible thing. Sociopathy is a disease, something people have to live and deal with.

In my youth, I had very serious problems with anger management. I twice beat other people so badly that they had to be sent to the hospital. I'm told that one time I lost control to such an extent that I punched a man in the mouth and he lost most of his teeth. I have no memory of this, but I do remember the lead up to that, and having bleeding and bruised knuckles for days afterwards.

I overcame this when a therapist taught me about CBT: Cognitive Behaviour Therapy. It might seem dumb, but the basic principle is that you decide how you feel about something. Consciously recognize that you're becoming angry, and then act to change the emotion before you get a physiological response, i.e. the adrenaline and other chemicals which fuck with your head and make you want to break/hurt things/people. Its really as simple as deciding that its not going to make you angry, and then exerting the energy in other ways. Push against a wall as hard as you can. Go to the gym, put as much weight as you can manage on a machine, and then push as hard as you fucking can. All this will help you calm down and metabolize the adrenaline.

But seriously, get your ass to a fucking therapist bro. No joke. Do it. Right fucking now.
#120316 - badgerbaiting (03/06/2014) [-]
Ok, so I was in love with this girl for a long time. We had sex quite a few times, a quasi-relationship for a while but for the most part it was strictly platonic and lasted ages. I would talk to her about anything, she helped me through some deep depression. I helped her through a messy break up, a few suicide attempts and an abusive boyfriend.

About half a year ago she cut me out of her life at her new boyfriends insistence. I shrugged and decided fuck it, we had a good run. I haven't thought about her since.

Until three days ago. I was lifting and I was stuck on my last rep. I remembered an old trick I'd been told; think of a girl to make you push yourself, a girl you want to protect, look after etc. She walked through my mind and I can't stop thinking about her. I don't want these feels again.

What should I do?
User avatar #120313 - nibbero (03/06/2014) [-]
When does your name start turning blue?
Where does the phase "Raise your donger!" come from and what does it mean?
When is the best time to post content?
What kind of content does FJ want to see?
Sorry for being a 'new-fag'
User avatar #120423 to #120313 - iridium (03/06/2014) [-]
-Dunno
-imaqtpie, League of Legends streamer.
-Best guess is around 7:00-8:0 PM GMT if you want it to get the most thumbs, that's when probably the most people will see it.
-Nobody fucking knows, it changes every hour and the site has a hive mind most of the time. Whatever is in the media at the time is usually popular, as well as trivia. Be mindful that old memes, rage comics, Ponies and Videos of any sort rarely make front page, while GIFs tend to do well. Also, NSFW content is liked but gets deleted every 24 hours and will likely only net you a few thumbs per content.
User avatar #120321 to #120313 - misticalz ONLINE (03/06/2014) [-]
ヽ༼ຈلຈ༽ノ raise your dongers ヽ༼ຈلຈ༽ノ
User avatar #120317 to #120313 - awesomerninjathing (03/06/2014) [-]
ヽ༼ຈلຈ༽ノ raise your dongers ヽ༼ຈلຈ༽ノ
User avatar #120307 - splattercrap (03/06/2014) [-]
Hey does anybody have a guide on how to edit a gif in photoshop? Everytime I try it doesn't work.
User avatar #120335 to #120307 - advicedude (03/06/2014) [-]
Open .gif file
Open Timeline window in PS
each layer is a frame. Select frame and layer to change. As you go, only one layer will be visible so yeah.
User avatar #120896 to #120335 - splattercrap (03/08/2014) [-]
How to you add text?
User avatar #120910 to #120896 - advicedude (03/08/2014) [-]
just like you normaly would
User avatar #120912 to #120910 - splattercrap (03/08/2014) [-]
but when I do that, it adds text to all the below frames too
User avatar #120917 to #120912 - advicedude (03/08/2014) [-]
make sure to hide the text layer. when you don't want it.
#120305 - xxxsonic fanxxx (03/06/2014) [-]
When I play a game, Ill hold down the W key to walk. But after I let go of the W key my computer sometimes makes me keep going forward. Why is my computer doing this and how do I fix it? It isnt my keyboard either. I switched it out with a different one and it still does it. I've had this new computer for a month and it has just started to do this.
User avatar #120306 to #120305 - letting (03/06/2014) [-]
In one game, or different games?
#120309 to #120306 - xxxsonic fanxxx (03/06/2014) [-]
any game. Also I have not seen it do this on any other application like word processor or on a browser.
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