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Online User List [+] Online: (3): rokkai, sasha, sugoi, anonymous(5).
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#192252 - inuares
Reply 0
(07/26/2015) [-]
Alright, I've got a fucking tale for you guys. You are probably not going to believe a fucking word I say, but you know what? I don't give a damn. My Mother just announced to my Father that she had a crush on another man and wanted a divorce. The man she has a crush on is the father of my friend who commit suicide back in September. And he's fucking married. So now my Father feels like shit, I'm fucking pissed, my brother's pissed, and my autistic brother doesn't have any fuckin emotion on the matter because he's fuckin retarded. Basically, we're gonna have to sell the god damn house, pack up and move and deal with my retarded brother having to get transferred somewhere else. All because my mom is being a selfish cunt. If you have any god damn advice for this shit, send me a message.
#192296 to #192252 - blueninja
Reply 0
(07/27/2015) [-]
Ok, you need to put it out there how you feel. I understand this will be difficult to convince any parent or guardian that you have the moral high ground. Make it clear that your mother's actions have consequences. You need to have a real conversation with your mother. make her comprehend fully that she is flirting with losing not just your father but you and brothers. She may not take you serious or accept your moral high ground. You need to be able to say years from now if she ever wises up that you gave her an out, that you gave her the opportunity to do the right thing. You will have put her in a position to be held accountable. hope this helps
#192384 to #192296 - inuares
Reply 0
(07/27/2015) [-]
thank you.
#192259 to #192252 - whathaveyoudone
Reply 0
(07/27/2015) [-]
kill your mother that way your father wont have to sell your house :^)
#192261 to #192259 - inuares
Reply +1
(07/27/2015) [-]
Getting away with murder isn't something I can do. But the thought crossed my mind.
#192294 to #192261 - whathaveyoudone
Reply 0
(07/27/2015) [-]
what if you pay someone else to do it?
#192258 to #192252 - welliguessitsaname
Reply 0
(07/27/2015) [-]
Tell her how you feel.
#192253 to #192252 - dreygur
Reply 0
(07/26/2015) [-]
Say thank you to the mother on behalf of her family. See how she reacts.
#192250 - thesuperintendent
Reply 0
(07/26/2015) [-]
ive been pooping out of my teeth help
#192251 to #192250 - anon
Reply +2
(07/26/2015) [-]
Just stop doing that.
That should fix the problem.
#192249 - thumbsdenied
Reply 0
(07/26/2015) [-]
My puppy is only 8 weeks old, but is there a way to teach her the "no" command. I try to get her attencion of being bad and saying no, then if she stops for few seconds i give her a treat and praise.

Problem is she dont give a bleeper about anything i try to do to get her attencion
#192356 to #192249 - kegget
Reply 0
(07/27/2015) [-]
Say no in a deep, strong, snappy voice.

But goddamn, she's only 8 weeks old. She should've been with her mother up until now. Puppies are puppies, she's gonna be pretty fucking dumb for the next 1.5 years.
#192268 to #192249 - delphine
Reply +1
(07/27/2015) [-]
Puppies are like children. It takes A LOT of repetition. They don't learn it after only 8 weeks. My dog is 2 and is just now behaving himself and following command. When you say NO, don't scream or yell it. Say it loudly, say it in a low tone, with confidence. I usually will grab his muzzle (not tightly, just enough to grab attention.) and sometimes I'd pin him on his back to assert dominance. You have to establish yourself as the pack leader, and then her instincts will kick in and she will listen.
#192254 to #192249 - dreygur
Reply 0
(07/27/2015) [-]
Say it in a harsh voice so it gets used to it being wrong. It's much easier for a dog to get used to the tone of your voice.
#192238 - anon
Reply 0
(07/26/2015) [-]
Hi, i live in the uk and am expected to go to uni next year, but i have a bit of a problem.
I want to be here with my friends and family to study economics.
However i'd also like to go study in the US?
There are a lot of good schools here like LSE, and it would only take me 3 years.
I was told i should do my undergrad here and grad in america.
But i'm also considering going to Wharton at UPenn
I have an offer from both schools. But Wharton looks really interesting, and i hear their alumni are pretty well off financially. Any Americans or anyone who can shed light on my situation? Thanks
#192370 to #192238 - joshlol
Reply +2
(07/27/2015) [-]
why the fuck would you want to study in the US?

shit's expensive yo

check your euro provilege
#192248 to #192238 - noobpeller
Reply 0
(07/26/2015) [-]
Hi, going into second year economics student here. I'd highly recommend saving Wharton as a grad option and doing undergrad in the UK you mentioned LSE was interested in you? let me just say i envy you . The problem with American universities is that they are usually more expensive, meaning that you usually have to take out a loan that, on average, you won't repay until you hit your midlife crisis, regardless of what job you get i've heard horror stories from some American friends that say that the interest on the loans are too high . It will also greatly affect your post-grad life, since you will have less money to set towards relatively basic things a house, a car, food,... I remember that after i had gotten accepted into my university, I looked at British universities both to see if i could do an exchange program, and i was also curious , and was amazed that places like Cambridge, Oxford, and LSE were as cheap as some universities in the US i would qualify as "mediocre". So, I'd suggest going with the cheaper option, since you are gonna get an amazing education closer to home, while also saving money you could put into going to a good grad school. What you could also do is look into your local university exchange programs. My university, for example, offers students the possibility of spending 2 years here and 2 years in an American university at the cost of my local university which is extremely cheaper . If you absolutely must do undergrad in Wharton, i'd suggest looking into that also, i don't really know if its different in the UK, but at my university there's a counselor specifically dedicated to helping people with exchange programs.
tl;dr: go to the UK, its less financially straining for the same great education
#192381 to #192248 - anon
Reply 0
(07/27/2015) [-]
Thanks, for the advice aha.
LSE is decent, but you don't understand, there's no ambition in the UK.
Wharton offers an economics degree on completion of a concentration.
There's no "fixed" course, they allow you to individualize your concentration.
#192389 to #192381 - noobpeller
Reply 0
(07/27/2015) [-]
Yeah, that's the more unique part of the US education system. The problem i usually see is the alternatives it gives you. You basically have to make your own diploma which could be a good thing if you're into that , but colleges do tend to have certain guidelines, where they tell you what options you can take. To name an example, my friend studies engineering over in the US, and he was not able to take more than two classes related to his major in his first year because if not he could not get the diploma of engineering from the university where he is at. Long story short, he's now taking an English and Philosophy course to get an engineering degree. What the college basically says is: "You can pick these courses that you know you aren't gonna use for shit in the future for the specific diploma you came to us for, or you can take courses actually worth their salt, at the price of your degree being changed to a liberal arts degree which, at least in the US, has as much value as two-ply toilet paper ".
Let me tell you at least how it goes in my university, which i guess is a bit closer to the british system than the american one is. I am in what i guess you'd consider a university with "fixed" courses. I have to obtain a number of obligatory credits by the time of graduation to get my diploma. However, everything i learn is working towards what will help me in the area i'm majoring in except maybe this theology course i had to take this year which in my opinion was complete bollocks, but then again, its understandable since my university is catholic . After the first year, however, i've found myself with alternatives pertaining to my second year. The electives i've gotten aren't that plentiful in fact, i only had the choice of 5 , but they do branch out into different economic areas just to give you a taste of what i mean, the electives i had to choose deal with credit-giving, worker's rights, marketing, economic history, and finance . I don't really know how it works over in the UK, but after the first year, you'll find that the "fixed" structures do tend to flex a bit more in the other years within, of course, the major you chose . However, if you feel like adding a bit of diversity into your diploma, then i suggest trying the Wharton option.

tl;dr: Wharton= diversity at the price of relevant subjects, UK= relevant subjects at the price of choice
#192398 to #192389 - anon
Reply +1
(07/27/2015) [-]
In all honesty, i would prefer to live in the US, which visa wise is another good option.
But i've also got an offer from Oxford into their Politics, Philosophy and Economics program. My whole issue is i prefer arts.. the aesthetics of things. I chose business and economics as a compromise, and i feel wharton gives me that compromise. But i don't know anyone in the US, and the Oxford option is a bit tempting, but i don't think an oxford degree is that respected in the US compared to their own colleges.
#192410 to #192398 - noobpeller
Reply 0
(07/27/2015) [-]
In the end its your decision. Go to the US if that's your preference. I'll tell you one thing, the American college lifestyle looks way funner than the European counterpart. I guess the US is less academics-focused than Europe is. Also, regarding Oxford, a) God do i envy you What, did you also get accepted into Cambridge, Harvard, Yale and all the other A-list universities too? , and B) I think its one of the most recognized universities there are, on par with Harvard and Cambridge. However, I wouldn't really go to Oxford just because everyone knows it, but only if you really see yourself studying there. The plus you'd have in studying in Wharton would be that if you plan in staying there and working there, you'd get a better feel of the people there. Plus, since your choice is Wharton, I can almost guarantee you will make connections there that will help you later in life. Economics in England and Economics in the US have some notable differences between them that can get pretty confusing at times I'm in a bilingual program, which means i get to learn the "English version" of things, which unfortunately is not limited to the American or British system. For example, British and American accounting systems have different ways of organizing and naming certain things, meaning i'd have to learn both terms to know what's what. . So yeah, if you really feel like going all-out American, then going to Wharton is your best bet. A post-note tip if you do decide on Wharton: look at the scholarships you can use. As a caveat to this, i suggest looking at exactly what the scholarship gives you. I've seen scholarships that are only for a year as well as scholarships that could just be described as glorified loans, so make sure before you pick.
#192428 to #192410 - anon
Reply +1
(07/28/2015) [-]
Actually I did get into Cambridge aha Oxbridge
I also got an offer from Harvard Law. I had a pretty good college resume Didn't get anything for Yale though aha.
I think i may go do an undergrad PPE at oxford, then maybe a second bachelors at Wharton, then MBA at Harvard.
I personally don't know too much about Wharton, do rich Americans send their kids there? What connections are there to make?
#192462 to #192428 - noobpeller
Reply 0
(07/28/2015) [-]
Well, let's just say Wharton tuition fees are closer to 50,000$/ year whereas in comparison Harvard's are closer to 40,000$/year. The connections, however, are not solely based on your classmates and their potentially rich families. Companies do tend to look at Wharton for potential employees, and I'm not saying "Old Pop's General Store" type companies but "Right in the smack middle of Wall st." type companies. And even just regular people that go there have high potential of being able to do something amazing in the future there's a reason Wharton accepted them .
I think your idea is pretty good. Oxford looks like an awesome college, and even if you decide to change your plans after graduating, you'll have an Oxford diploma, which is really worth something.
#192577 to #192462 - anon
Reply 0
(07/29/2015) [-]
I thought Harvard was more highly regarded than Wharton?
Why do companies look at Wharton?
#192578 to #192577 - noobpeller
Reply 0
(07/29/2015) [-]
Well, i didn't exactly say that Harvard was better than Wharton, i just made a price comparison to something familiar so you could see how its a large investment to study there. Now as to your second question, companies look at Wharton cause its a good school for economics. Famous places like MIT are famous because of their quality education they are said to give particularly in one or two things. The programs that they are known for are usually better in comparison to others, which is why no one usually takes an Anthropology major from MIT, since that's not what companies look for in an MIT graduate. So, long story short, companies look at Wharton because their Economics program is good, and what they need are good economists, just like they look at Harvard for good lawyers.
#192580 to #192578 - anon
Reply 0
(07/29/2015) [-]
I hear people coming out of Wharton are also particularly making a decent living.
#192239 to #192238 - anon
Reply 0
(07/26/2015) [-]
when people call college "uni"
#192240 to #192239 - ephialtes
Reply 0
(07/26/2015) [-]
Well in the UK 'college' is what America calls 'high school' (I think) so we have to use a different word for university.
#192241 to #192240 - dragx
Reply 0
(07/26/2015) [-]
Nah man, we call high school, secondary school.
Then we call good higher education uni
and less so college.
#192242 to #192241 - ephialtes
Reply 0
(07/26/2015) [-]
Oh okay, my bad.
So what do Americans call what we call college?
#192243 to #192242 - dragx
Reply +1
(07/26/2015) [-]
I don't think they categories as much as we do.
Good high schools are called, grammar schools in the UK
while normal ones are just secondary school.
Good higher education facilities are uni,
whilst normal ones are college.
I guess we just live in a more class orientated society
#192232 - kegget
Reply 0
(07/26/2015) [-]
Ways to protect face from sun without the use of lotion? I have sensitive skin and can't use sun cream without getting a rash.
#192244 to #192232 - delphine
Reply +2
(07/26/2015) [-]
Same problem. I always wear a baseball hat and try and stick to shade. If I'm going to be outside for a LONG time, I use Neutrogena Pure and Free for babies. Baby sunscreens are typically gentler.
#192234 to #192232 - beams
Reply +5
(07/26/2015) [-]
Just stay inside on funnyjunk comrade
#192219 - victhree
Reply 0
(07/26/2015) [-]
I'm scared. A few minutes ago, I suddenly lost the ability to speak properly. Every single sentence I tried to make up was a train wreck (e.g: I started things like "praty" instead of "party", or "pssa" instead of "past"). I managed to excuse myself and go to the bathroom. There, I attempted to calm down and tried to say some words to regain confidence, but It was useless, I still got them all wrong. After a couple of minutes, everything went back to normal and I was able to read out loud the label on the shampoo bottle, but I wasn't easy.

I've remember reading about these sort of episodes. Something might be wrong with my brain, and that terrifies me. While writing this, I made a lot more spelling mistakes than I usually make. Should I be worried?

Sorry for the English, it's not my first language and I'm a bit too shocked to write a decent text right now.
#192299 to #192219 - blueninja
Reply 0
(07/27/2015) [-]
dude get that checked it almost sounds like you had a mini stroke
#192288 to #192219 - assyria
Reply 0
(07/27/2015) [-]
I would say it might be a complex migraine. They're weird things that can affect you in a ton of different ways you wouldn't even realize. Sometimes it paralyzes half your face, and sometimes the victim spouts gibberish every time they open their mouth.

There's a video of a reporter on TV suffering a complex migraine and sounding like she was speaking Latin. That's an example of a complex migraine.
#192255 to #192219 - dreygur
Reply 0
(07/27/2015) [-]
I think it's common to have one of those days where you can't speak or write properly. I myself wouldn't be too worried too soon unless the issue persists. My mother language is pretty complicated, so I tend to have periods where I can't form correct sentences.
#192220 to #192219 - anon
Reply +1
(07/26/2015) [-]
Sounds like a stroke, man. You okay?
#192221 to #192220 - victhree
Reply 0
(07/26/2015) [-]
I'm fine. It only lasted for a few minutes.

I haven't slept in a while but I've suffered insomnia a few times and nothing like this ever happened.
#192222 to #192221 - anon
Reply 0
(07/26/2015) [-]
Well, I only know one language so I wouldn't know what it's like to speak or think in two separate languages so maybe you're just a little stressed out.
#192223 to #192222 - victhree
Reply 0
(07/26/2015) [-]
No, I was speaking Spanish with my family, and suddenly it happened. When I was freaking out in the bathroom, I tried to see if It also happened when I spoke in English and yes, it did.
#192224 to #192223 - anon
Reply 0
(07/26/2015) [-]
Ask someone else who is also bilingual to see if that has happened to them. It doesn't sound all that serious, but just check to be sure.
#192225 to #192224 - victhree
Reply 0
(07/26/2015) [-]
I'm usually pretty fluent with english, this has never happened before, and I use both languages a lot everyday. I doubt it's related to bilingualism.
#192245 to #192225 - anon
Reply 0
(07/26/2015) [-]
Can confirm its mostly neurological and probably not because of your bilingual
#192246 to #192245 - victhree
Reply 0
(07/26/2015) [-]
Well then, could it be serious?
#192230 to #192225 - schurftinator
Reply 0
(07/26/2015) [-]
this does not sound like it is related to any language, but neurological. I would definitely see a doctor about this.
#192217 - yourinvisiblegf
Reply 0
(07/26/2015) [-]
whatcha thinking about my new text color ?
#192218 to #192217 - braveblue
Reply +7
(07/26/2015) [-]
It's green.
#192300 to #192218 - blueninja
Reply 0
(07/27/2015) [-]
should have picked blue
#192212 - nonbenderinlife
Reply +1
(07/26/2015) [-]
What are some good topics to talk about in parties or in general with friends and other people?
I went to a party yesterday and through I initiated conversations with other people they died after a while. Specifically, I asked 2 people what they study but we didnt have anything else to talk about after we covered that up.
Im not very talkative and I found myself looking at the surroundings whenever I couldnt look at someone because they were talking.
Thanks in advance
#192282 to #192212 - UNIQUELOL
Reply +1
(07/27/2015) [-]
Man this has to be one of the most major dilemmas to life in general.

Pretty much all I can say is know the type of people you're trying to initiate a conversation with.

Pushing your type of humor on them could be very risky, but most people have a twisted sense of humor anyways so you should be able to always fall back on that.
#192201 - anon
Reply 0
(07/26/2015) [-]
This post is pointless
Sometimes I think maybe if I didn’t try so hard everything would be easier and I could live a happier life.
But I know that’s not how it is because I think I’ve tried it.
The truth is that I’m not the person that doesn’t try and just everything works out for them
I try desperately to force my life to go exactly where I want it to
And it works. From the outside, it would seem that I’m pretty successful, and I’m doing well in everything that I do. But it’s so hard. Like everything is a battle to be how I want to be. Even when I win, it still takes a toll. And I wonder how long I can keep doing this. Indefinitely? Will I just always be this way? I’m not sure if I like it or not. Because I’ve prided myself on the battle, I guess. Part of what makes me who I am is the fights that I endure, the strange struggle for a better life that’s freeing and suffocating at the same time.
I don’t know. I just know that it’s impossible to go with the flow because you make the flow yourself. If you stop fighting, there is no flow. But it’s not a peaceful stillness. It’s an ugly, putrid stagnancy.
And it’s so easy to just let it take you. Just sit and be and let nothing happen, and all the mold and the slime will creep up on you until you’re black and rotten inside.
I guess you realize that it doesn’t make you very happy.
And mold is hard to get rid of. It’s hard to get up and start functioning after your insides have been sitting in filthy nothing and taking up space for so long.
I don’t know. I don’t know that the answer is. A person must find their own way and their own flow, but it feels like there isn’t a flow that flows.
I sound edgy as fuck and I really don’t care. Fucking edgy preteen babby needs to let out some feelings. Well, fuck it, I do need to. Everyone does. I don’t care.
#192204 to #192201 - metajunky
Reply 0
(07/26/2015) [-]
I don't think it's edgy. "Edgy" only applies to petty people who are trying to be dark or badass in an attempt to make people fear/respect. You're not edgy, just someone getting stuff off their chest in a poetic way

As for the meat of you're post, well it's vague as hell and I'm not the best at these kinds of things, so I don't know how much help I can be. But from what you describe, it seems like you are "winning" at life. Even if it does take a toll, your victories are still piling up. You're Eisenhower, and life is Nazi Germany cowering back to Berlin. You're losing a ton of good men, but you're air raids are decimating life's means of production, and your ground troops are tearing life up from the opposite front. Life's putting up a meager resistance, but it's fighting a lising battle. Your hard work is too much for it to overcome
#192196 - anon
Reply 0
(07/26/2015) [-]
This gon' be long

Long story short, I'm a 23 year old dateless virgin. As far as everything else is going though, I think I'm doing alright with myself. I don't think I'm all that bad looking. I work out. My family life is good. I'm in graduate school working to become a pharmacist. I have a small but tight knit group of friends. Just got back not too long ago from a family trip to Europe. Overall, I'm pretty happy with how things are going for me

It's just my nonexistent love life bothers me every single day. It legitimately keeps me up at night. My biggest fear is coming home from a stressful day of work to an empty house with nothing to keep me company but my loneliness. I have friends who I've known since we were kids, but I can't tell if we will still to visit and bullshit around 10 years from now, and I'm not really good at making new friends, especially not good friends like these guys. I want to be able to meet new people, including a prospective girlfriend

And I'm not in this only to lose my V-Card. I truely desire a meaningful relationship. Sure, I'm perfectly fine with having a little fun before starting any serious relationships, but I want to someday fall in love and find some girl who is equal parts partner and best friend. But I think the people I've associated with throughout my life never made me feel pressured into finding a girl right away. My closest friends are made up of neighborhood kids who I grew up with, but I'm older than most of them by like 4 or 5 years. My good friends and I in high school mostly bullshitted around and cracked jokes at each other. And in undergrad I only made two really good friends, both computer nerds who never set foot outside our apartment, one of whom has been engaged to the same girl since high school and the other is likely worse than me as far as women go

I never really had any outside pressure or opportunity to form any sort of "game." It doesn't help that I was brutally bullied in middle school, which made me become very shy and wary of going to any big social events (clubs, parties, etc.) Whenever I do, it takes a lot out of me

I know I'm probably just looking for excuses for what's likely just cowardice, but I feel like I don't know the first thing about talking to a woman other than small talk and using common sense. I find it hard talking to any new person I meet at great lengths. I TRY, but I always think I'm too boring of a person. There are too many times where I meet someone and the conversation just results in awkward silence, where we don't know what else to say, where it feels like I'm making them suffer by talking to me. I can't imagine what it would be like trying to charm some girl with NO practice at doing so, NO experience with relationships and how to make them work, and being a complete amateur in bed, especially at my age. I dread the thought that it's too late for me to find a girlfriend, that I've gone way past a sort of acceptable "deadline" where I'm just a freak or loser for not having gone through these things first hand

Sometimes I feel I'm even letting my family down. I feel like it's a sort of elephant in the room that I have gone so far in my life without any experience with the opposite sex. My family is full of outgoing people who make friends everywhere and are just fun to be around. I'm sometimes not sure I fit in with them, and it upsets me because I want to be that way too

But ultimately, I shouldn't care what my family and friends think, and I don't. I want to get better with girls for my own benefit. I want to be desirable and I want to find myself in a happy relationship, if just so I can more sociable and fun to be around. So gang, how should I go about improving myself?
#192301 to #192196 - blueninja
Reply 0
(07/27/2015) [-]
ok man counter story time I lost the vcard around 17 and was relatively often sexually active from then on. then i turned 23 and I cant explain why but seeking out sexual partners became lower and lower on my priorities list. this is not to say i had a decrease in libido I jerk off as almost a pre sleep ritual these days but rather a growing disinterest in pursuit of sexual activity. to the point where now at 27 I spent 26 essentially celibate made out/fondled not withstanding finding the right girl to fuck, optimistically for the rest of my life, became more and more important. I took this as an indication of maturity and further sign that i am a monogamist at heart. so do not lose heart my young friend, you discovered what it took me much longer to figure out (who you are and what is important to you.) the world has put too much stock into promiscuity as an almost mandatory staple of adolescence without taking into consideration that for every norm there is an enigma. Do not fear being ostracized, but stand in defiance of anyone that makes you feel like you should not be who you are. and don't worry statistically there are thousands of partners perfect for you.
#192440 to #192301 - anon
Reply 0
(07/28/2015) [-]
That's an interesting perspective, but it made me fewl better so thanks man
#192263 to #192196 - thebestpieever
Reply 0
(07/27/2015) [-]
The more you treat women like scary others you have to learn your way around the less close you'll get to any of them in any real sense. They're people, normal people. Just get a bit of confidence in yourself, learn to carry a conversation and you'll find someone who likes you. There's no "game" or strategy to develop. Just be comfortable in your own skin and learn to deal with people. That's what a healthy relationship is built of: two people who like each other as they are, but very importantly don't need each other to feel well about themselves. As for a bit of casual fun, that's very superficial and simple: Just talk to people you find attractive -in an appropriate setting, obviously, not like in line at a bank- and be clear about your intentions. If you know how to talk to people -seriously, this is an important skill for everything in life-, they find you good looking and that's the kind of stuff they're down for then you're set.

But seriously, the more at ease you feel with yourself and in your skin, in social situations or otherwise, the more people will feel at ease when being with you. Likely many people already do, you're just too tense to notice it.
#192439 to #192263 - anon
Reply 0
(07/28/2015) [-]
Thanks man. I think I just worry about things too much sometimes. I never really tried to put myself out there. That's the first hurdle. I think things will fall into place after that. Much appreciated friend
#192229 to #192196 - anon
Reply 0
(07/26/2015) [-]
stop being a lily liver faggot
#192202 to #192196 - kegget
Reply 0
(07/26/2015) [-]
"My biggest fear is coming home from a stressful day of work to an empty house with nothing to keep me company but my loneliness."

Get a dog. Keeps you company, something to work on, and chicks love dogs.
#192176 - anon
Reply 0
(07/26/2015) [-]
loaded shotgun by my side, thoughts on suicide for years.

The only thing that keeps me from going through with this is my parents, I can't let them see me with my brains all over the place. But I really don't enjoy living, I don't get it.

I doubt ill kill myself anytime soon but shit, what do i do to become happy, I have no drive, no friends, and no one to talk to. Hell even my family hardly wants anything to do with me.

Going to college in less than a month, I have my doubts that I can do well, I never really did great in school, im not sure if im dumb or not. Diagnosed with depression and anxiety disorder in middle school. I stopped getting good grades around 7th grade and since around then I just have no desire to do anything, my only escape is video games and anime.

what do guys
#192237 to #192176 - anon
Reply 0
(07/26/2015) [-]
I never could kill myself because I know if I do then at one point I'm going to be on a gurney somewhere in the coroners office and I'll be naked I don't know jack about how they deal with dead people and if I'm naked people are going to see my tiny prick. I can't go out like that
#192227 to #192176 - dingdongsingsong
Reply 0
(07/26/2015) [-]
wait till college , you'll meet new people, start over , you don't have anything to live for right now because you're not even trying,set goals, meet people , live for yourself.
#192190 to #192176 - mataleao
Reply +1
(07/26/2015) [-]
Hey, if you want to you can PM me. I don't know how much help i can be, but Id love to try and offer you any help i can
#192186 to #192176 - icefried
Reply 0
(07/26/2015) [-]
eat your weight in psychedelic shrooms.
#192187 to #192186 - icefried
Reply 0
(07/26/2015) [-]
not at once of course
#192184 to #192176 - alexanderburns ONLINE
Reply 0
(07/26/2015) [-]
Run at least three times a week and eat more ice cream
#192185 to #192184 - anon
Reply +1
(07/26/2015) [-]
I run 5 times a week. I guess i could add more ice cream.
#192188 to #192185 - alexanderburns ONLINE
Reply 0
(07/26/2015) [-]
Ice cream is v good
#192189 to #192188 - anon
Reply 0
(07/26/2015) [-]
True that
#192181 to #192176 - anon
Reply +1
(07/26/2015) [-]
school is only as hard as you make it. you wanna do well in school? do your first two years at a comunity college where things are easy as shit. sometimes in major schools professors are unreasonably hard on the freshmen to get them to change majors or drop out. This shouldn't happen in gen eds because that is stupid as fuck. in community college no one gives a flying fuck about anything, so the material is easy and you get great grades to transfer over.

if you don't do well this semester it's not the end of the world, just transfer to a community college then transfer back later. it's a lot easier to work while at community college too, as homework is rare and/or easy as shit. then transfer back in a year or two and finish up your degree.
#192178 to #192176 - mattempire
Reply 0
(07/26/2015) [-]
Suicide is not ever the answer. PM me fella, even talking shit out can help.
#192179 to #192178 - anon
Reply 0
(07/26/2015) [-]
did i say id kill myself? I mean if you cant factor in the rest of what i said i doubt you can help.
#192180 to #192179 - mattempire
Reply 0
(07/26/2015) [-]
The loaded weapon by your side was my main concern, but my point is any thing can help, even a stranger at the end of a phone happy to listen. Don't discount anything before you give it a chance?
#192182 to #192180 - anon
Reply 0
(07/26/2015) [-]
#192183 to #192182 - mattempire
Reply 0
(07/26/2015) [-]
...
#192168 - mattempire
Reply 0
(07/26/2015) [-]
I've just come back from a night out, got kicked out of a club. Ask a very very alcohol britbong anything
#192228 to #192168 - dingdongsingsong
Reply 0
(07/26/2015) [-]
did you lose your vCard like that ?
#192169 to #192168 - kegget
Reply 0
(07/26/2015) [-]
Happens to the best of us
#192173 to #192169 - mattempire
Reply 0
(07/26/2015) [-]
Trying to stop a fight between your best friend and a random is cause for getting chucked out but ahh well, good night had by all
#192200 to #192173 - kegget
Reply 0
(07/26/2015) [-]
They're the best kind of nights

I get kicked out of clubs or refused entry 70% of the time and still have a blast
#192163 - gramernazi
Reply 0
(07/26/2015) [-]
Does anyone have a guideline on how to like act like another human? Like a outgoing type, one that talks to people? Like I feel like I could do that, but I'm just antisocial as shit. I just want to know what everyone else does.
#192191 to #192163 - delphine
Reply +1
(07/26/2015) [-]
Exposure. Spend more time with humans, less time with electronics.

Honestly, sometimes I think technology is causing us to not be able to function the way we're supposed to. Humans are supposed to be social animals, and we need it. With technology we don't have to talk to people face-to-face as much anymore. Kids play video games or watch TV together, instead of playing in the backyard and making up pretend games. Teens text each other and instagram instead of making conversations. I got much more outgoing my sophomore year in college, when I left my video games and computer games at home. Instead, I got out there and did stuff with other people, and made friends.

That's just what I did.

#192171 to #192163 - mattempire
Reply +1
(07/26/2015) [-]
I agree with the post above. Getting really drunk helps, but honestly your main mental blockage is you thinking you're not interesting or whatever. Just force yourself outside of what you'd normally do. You know what, you're at least brave enough to come out and admit your own shortcomings, you're braver than fucking 95% of the population. You want to be more social, you walk up to that person and ask them about themselves. Genuine interest is the best driver of conversation, unless you're a HUGE introvert and you don't give the slightest shit about anyone else on this planet, you'll be grand. I really really really really hate to suggest this, but unless all else goes wrong, Google RSD (real social dynamics) julian. He has tonnes of videos based around conversation flow and what you can do. Granted its aimed at sad old men who want one night stands, but it helped me get an idea of how you can help guide conversations if you think you aren't doing well. I can't stess enough you're an amazing person no matter what, and the confidence that stems from that should steer you in the right way.

Worst comes to worst, you can't be as bad as joshlol
#192170 to #192163 - anon
Reply +1
(07/26/2015) [-]
Think of someone who know who's really confident like you'd like to be. Don't copy them, but try and impersonate things like how they hold themselves, how loud they'd be, when they think it's acceptable to talk and who they'd go up and talk to.

Get some nice clothes and a good haircut is good start though, do something that makes you feel good about yourself.
#192164 to #192163 - anon
Reply +3
(07/26/2015) [-]
just force yourself to do shit is what I do. I hate dancing, drinking, I hate doing social things but I end up feeling better for having done them. Like, seriously force yourself out of your comfort zone. Pretend you're confident and happy and funny and you'll end up being it, pretty much.
#192140 - misscleoisotaku
0
has deleted their comment [-]
#192302 to #192140 - blueninja
Reply +1
(07/27/2015) [-]
honestly....try to learn from this is my best advice, I'm not saying don't smoke weed cause its bad its not I'm saying don't do shit where the risk/reward is skewed out of your favor with big consequences on the table
#192203 to #192140 - kegget
Reply +2
(07/26/2015) [-]
My friend worked as a pharmicist and had a drug test coming up. He was on ketamine and weed every day and was only told a day before that there would be a test.

He got my other friend who's completely clean off drugs to piss in a bottle before he set off to work. He kept the bottle down his pants wrapped in a sock to keep it warm and it worked.

He later lost the job for stealing drugs.
#192162 to #192140 - youngneil
Reply +2
(07/26/2015) [-]
Drink a shitload of water and eat cranberries. That's what a friend of mine does and he's passed every drug test he's ever taken. I was told it should clear your system in a few days.
Also, I'm pretty sure you can't get arrested for failing a drug test for a job. At least that's how it is here.
#192144 to #192140 - whathaveyoudone
Reply +2
(07/25/2015) [-]
buy piss from someone else
#192172 to #192144 - lgninjaleetful ONLINE
Reply 0
(07/26/2015) [-]
doesnt work usually, they see if your urine on hand is warm. if not then they know its not yours.
#192143 to #192140 - unitedabominations
Reply 0
(07/25/2015) [-]
Unless the drug test is required by your PO and not the employer, you just don't go.

Otherwise, you're fucked.
#192142 to #192140 - alexanderburns ONLINE
Reply 0
(07/25/2015) [-]
Not go to test
#192136 - anon
Reply 0
(07/25/2015) [-]
best non contract cellular carriers? preferably something "bring your own phone"
#192175 to #192136 - mattempire
Reply 0
(07/26/2015) [-]
If you're in britbong giffgaff worked amazingly for me. They sent you a SIM free, and £9.99/month ish got you unlimited texts, 100 minutes (from memory) and 2gb data. It was entirely non committal and was like you paid a tenner and got a months worth of the above. No strings attached it worked a wonder for me in my first two years of uni
#192138 to #192136 - unitedabominations
Reply 0
(07/25/2015) [-]
Metro was good for me until I swapped to Verizon. Only time I really have outages is in North Carolina and West Virginia.

I travel for business, so I figured it out pretty quick where their map was full of shit lol.
#192130 - mcdonaldsexplain
Reply 0
(07/25/2015) [-]
awww
#192141 to #192130 - joshlol
Reply 0
(07/25/2015) [-]
sucks
#192135 to #192130 - schurftinator
Reply 0
(07/25/2015) [-]
huh how come?
#192205 to #192135 - hellomynameisbill ONLINE
Reply 0
(07/26/2015) [-]
faking rolls?
#192211 to #192205 - schurftinator
Reply 0
(07/26/2015) [-]
that is... actually very probable now you mention it
#192107 - gozoglontz
Reply 0
(07/25/2015) [-]
What is the quickest, painless way to kill oeself?
#192231 to #192107 - kegget
Reply +1
(07/26/2015) [-]
If i PM'd you a picture of my tits can you not kill yourself?
#192272 to #192231 - misticalz
0
has deleted their comment [-]
#192236 to #192231 - gozoglontz
Reply 0
(07/26/2015) [-]
Regardless of your gender by the way, tits are tits.
#192273 to #192236 - misticalz
Reply 0
(07/27/2015) [-]
did u get tits lmao
#192235 to #192231 - gozoglontz
Reply 0
(07/26/2015) [-]
Yes. 100% positive I won't. I can send you a pic of my faec in return.
#192177 to #192107 - mattempire
Reply 0
(07/26/2015) [-]
Ending it is never the best way out. PM me (or anyone else for that matter. I can't imagine anyone would actively, seriously encourge suicide unless in very very extenuating circumstances). Talking it out can always help, even if you think that no one can help. FJ is a big autistic community who're always happy to help, lay it on us.
#192166 to #192107 - whathaveyoudone
Reply 0
(07/26/2015) [-]
boot to the head
#192165 to #192107 - prominant
Reply 0
(07/26/2015) [-]
I almost drowned, honestly it's not that bad. The struggle is the worst bit but actually it's chill, although I don't recommend killing yourself lol, like, just kill yourself when you're 70 or something instead. Might as well, like, we're pretty lucky to be here, you could totally like, see what the rest of your life brings you. Plus even if you feel fucked, you could still do some good, you feel? Maybe leave some sort of legacy, I don't know. Try it, you might like it.
#192116 to #192107 - dragondust
Reply 0
(07/25/2015) [-]
Pills or asphyxiation
hopefully this is all theoretical.
#192117 to #192116 - gozoglontz
Reply 0
(07/25/2015) [-]
Not really. Sorry man.
#192111 to #192107 - captainfuckitall
Reply 0
(07/25/2015) [-]
Jumping off a building, gun, what anon said, chainsaw to neck, etc.

But you already knew all this, did you not? It doesn't seem like you want to die, you just want pain to stop; I suggest talking with someone, old chap.
#192115 to #192111 - gozoglontz
Reply 0
(07/25/2015) [-]
Talking does not get rid of blood cancer, weight, or arrogance. Thanks for the advice though, sincerely.
#192120 to #192115 - makotoitou
Reply 0
(07/25/2015) [-]
pretty sure putting down the fork fixes all of those
#192131 to #192120 - thedudeistheman
Reply 0
(07/25/2015) [-]
How does eating less cure cancer?
#192121 to #192120 - gozoglontz
Reply +1
(07/25/2015) [-]
I will try, first I gotta put down your mum though.
#192118 to #192115 - alstorp
Reply 0
(07/25/2015) [-]
Is it Leukaemia? How long do you have?
#192119 to #192118 - gozoglontz
Reply 0
(07/25/2015) [-]
Ye, and I beat it half a year ago, I have been going to the gym every second day and handling my diet since then, and I basically lost 0 weight and I lost faith, and I see no point in trying anymore.
#192129 to #192119 - hoban
Reply 0
(07/25/2015) [-]
I dont mean to sound like a dick or make you feel bad but seriously? you beat cancer thats beyond awesome you shouldnt think about ending it you have done something so many others have tried to do and they failed. You have a second chance see the positive side to that. Lossing weight can be really hard trust me i know. What do you focus on at the gym? if you need some tips on diet and what not feel free to inbox me.
#192123 to #192119 - alstorp
Reply 0
(07/25/2015) [-]
Well that sucks anus. You'd think beating leukaemia would give a lot of faith. Maybe try a different diet again? You gotta burn more calories than you gain.

If you're 100% certain though, gas asphyxiation is good (don't do normal asphyxiation via rope, it will hurt extremely much towards the end), gun is good, OD is good. Don't jump in front of a train or something dumb like that which hurts other people.
#192108 to #192107 - schurftinator
Reply 0
(07/25/2015) [-]
Hi!

I honestly wouldn't know an answer to your question, but if you maybe want someone to talk to then I'm here for you
#192101 - kokicakokos
Reply 0
(07/25/2015) [-]
Hey fj i didnt know where to post this but i would like some help.
recently i got into lucid dreaming and im not about to quit but if im doing something wrong pls tell me. I go to bed as usuall and sleep for about 5 hours. Then i wake up and just walk around the house for 20min. I go back to bed and lie on my back, relax as much as i can ,and stare into the blackness of my closed eyelids w8ing for hypnagogic imagery. I sometimes lose focus for a few secs but all i can see are some blobs like when you squeeze your eyes with your fingers. i w8 around 20-60 min yet nothing changes... btw sry if this is weird
#192110 to #192101 - captainfuckitall
Reply 0
(07/25/2015) [-]
You're going about it wrong; you're doing a method to get into dream paralysis.

For Lucid dreaming, you need to recognize you ARE dreaming without waking up. There are a few ways you can do this.

To start, you have to recognize what a dream is, so keep a diary, both for real life and a dream diary, it'll help you pick out similarities between your dreams that's different from real life.

Second, you can draw things on your hand before sleeping and look at them, so when you dream and notice the marks NOT on your hands, you know something's up.

Third, sometimes act out in real life. Whether pinching yourself, saying something odd, or otherwise disrupting a casual day; by people's reactions, you will know you're awake, so when you do it in a dream and they roll with it, you know it's a dream.
#192122 to #192110 - kokicakokos
Reply +1
(07/25/2015) [-]
Ty captain
#192104 to #192101 - anon
Reply 0
(07/25/2015) [-]
Sounds gay.

Just go get laid.
#192105 to #192104 - kokicakokos
Reply 0
(07/25/2015) [-]
Yep....it does
#192102 to #192101 - kokicakokos
Reply 0
(07/25/2015) [-]
Ps. I have been doing this for a week... or more
#192100 - pookahootycreeks
Reply 0
(07/25/2015) [-]
I just got 21K and I'm super scared about something that good happening to me what do?
#192147 to #192100 - chokebee
Reply -2
(07/25/2015) [-]
Invest in a dictionary.
#192093 - anon
Reply 0
(07/25/2015) [-]
I've always wanted either one of my dogs or cat to sleep on my bed
(i've got a huge ass bed passed down to me so theres plenty of room)
Also my bed doesn't have a frame so they get up just fine.
But they never seem like they want to stay
how would i be able to get them to chill
#192099 to #192093 - foreveranonymous
Reply 0
(07/25/2015) [-]
Bring them to bed with you, and when they're in bed pet them a whole lot. Eventually you should be able to pat the bed and they'll realize "oh they want me there". Maybe get them in bed and then give them a treat? I've always had very strong bonds with my cats so I've never had to worry about this. They just follow me into bed... and the kitchen, and the bathroom, and the living room...
#192095 to #192093 - dingdongsingsong
Reply 0
(07/25/2015) [-]
start petting them on your bed till they fall asleep