Meanwhile, in Markarth. We find the Dragonborn of Skyrim within the great walls of Markarth attempting to get directions from one of the local guards; and is co
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Meanwhile, in Markarth

We find the Dragonborn of Skyrim within the great walls of Markarth attempting to get directions from one of the local guards; and is constantly met with blatant remarks by the guard about the Dragonborn's career choices while whining about the stone cold beds. The Dragonborn, being frustrated, tries to step away from the guardsmen as the guard talks about once being an adventurer until an arrow in the knee changed his life forever. and that his cousin is out fighting dragons while he gets stuck with guard duty. The Dragonborn slips away and warns another guard about the previous one, just to be warned that he shouldn't be lollygaggin.

[Detailed description as asked by Admin]

THIS LOCAL M P
I' LL HAVE TO ASK FOP
A IS A MESS.
DIRECTIONS O?
I' M NEVER’ GOING TO GET ANYWHERE...
AHEM... EXCUSE ME,
GUARDSMAN, COULD YOU“?
WHOAA, EASY NOW/ I' LL KEEP MY
HANDS RIGHT WHIPE YOU CAN SEE
WHAT? NO, I WAS JUST
WONDERING IF YOU COULD...
FINE, I ADMIT " You
omen's ME. NOW PLEASE
K I no
an I JUST SAID...
I USED TO BE AN ADVENTURER? LIKE YOU BUT
THEN I TOOK AN IN THE KNEE,
my SW To A
LET ME GUESS, SOMEONE
STOKE YOU? SWEETROLLS’
DON' T TQY TO BAXTER
WITH ME LIKE I' M ONE
THOSE DAMNED
SHOPKEEPER'S
it KNOW %' GUILD
WHEN I SEE ONE! YOU' PE NOT
FOOLING ANYONE.’
TO HIDE IT ALL YOU WANT.
AND SO 00 THE OTHER .
I KNOW vow:
mo, ALWAYS
ABOUT.
MY ’ S OUT FIGHTING
DRAGONS AND WHAT
DO I GET? GUARD DUTY!
CAN' T BEL
IEVE I' M
TED HOPE. EVEN
THE BEDS APE MADE
OF STONE. 'SOB'
GOT ME THINKING. MAYBE I AM THE DRAGONBORN
AND I JUST DON' T KNOW IT YET.
YALI' LIKE ME, gm
DON' T FANCY THOSE CLUNKY
WEAPONS.
BUT YOU' RE EQUIPPING... A BATTLE an
OH, FORGET ABOUT " ON A SECOND
THOUGHT MAYBE I' LL JUST... GO.
YOU GO FIDDLING ANY
LOCKS ABOUND HERE AND
WE' GOING TO HAVE A
DEAL PEOBLEM!
DISRESPECT
THE LAW AND YOU
DISRESPECT ME!!!
YOU KNOW, I THINK
THERE MIGHT BE SOMETHING
WRONG WITH YOU?
PARTNER OVER THEQK...
CE LINDA KINDA 9019
...
+1376
Views: 60863
Favorited: 131
Submitted: 01/12/2014
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Comments(175):

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#1 - burdensomebucket (01/12/2014) [+] (18 replies)
**burdensomebucket rolls 58**
#13 - yologdog (01/13/2014) [+] (7 replies)
I'll Gag whatever Loli I want.
#6 - kcwsooners (01/13/2014) [+] (1 reply)
THANK YOU FUNNYJUNK POSTING HUMAN!!!

IT"S 'IN THE KNEE' NOT 'TO THE KNEE'

YOU GOT IT RIGHT!
#115 - infamoustrapper (01/13/2014) [-]
Some guards can be pretty weird, but I mean it's stressful life. It gets to your head. Like take this one instance I had really scarred me.
>Be guard at whiterun
>would quit, but only thing I can get because of knee injury
>hear Dragonborn becomes thane
>See him coming in full iron armor.
>keep it cool
>comment on his iron armor, doesn't respond
>then I got idea to stay updated in all the late news to keep him in the loop
>nobody ever breaks any laws anyways
>find out the craziest **** like dark brotherhood, and thieves guild
>one day he looks more flustered than usual
>stops in his tracks
>suddenly draws weapons and starts slaughtering everybody
>no one is spared
>shoots me in knee with arrow (guess he thought it would be ironic with my injury, sick bastard)
>no one left besides me
>about to bleed out
>he stops in his tracks again
>suddenly find myself at beginning of shift
>entire town looks as if nothing had happened
>wtf.jpg
>Dragonborn looks like he just blew off some steam
>to this day do not know what the **** happened.
#29 - toguro (01/13/2014) [+] (13 replies)
User avatar #11 - mkgt (01/13/2014) [+] (6 replies)
"Took an arrow to the knee" is old Norse slang for "Getting married"
+41
#12 to #11 - testaburger has deleted their comment [-]
#14 - newdevyx (01/13/2014) [+] (7 replies)
**newdevyx rolled a random image posted in comment #7196427 at Safe For Work Random Board **
>the safest city in the reach

**** that it ain't safe at all.
#19 to #14 - groovierpoet (01/13/2014) [-]
duuude..
User avatar #15 - alphagex (01/13/2014) [+] (4 replies)
fiddle with some cock and we're have a real party around here

thank u internet
User avatar #10 - kirkbot ONLINE (01/13/2014) [-]
wow after all these years, finally someone gets the joke right
iit's an arrow IN the knee, not TO the knee
User avatar #7 - cubanwhiteman ONLINE (01/13/2014) [+] (4 replies)
Makes me miss the oblivion guards. You could ask them for directions to different buildings in town. Now they just sort of... well look at the ******* post again.
#78 - eiramart (01/13/2014) [+] (5 replies)
I lost so much time
#21 - redstonealchemist (01/13/2014) [+] (11 replies)
but... but...
#97 - intenso (01/13/2014) [+] (1 reply)
**intenso rolled a random image posted in comment #9 at I just had a similar conversation **
User avatar #25 - lollygod (01/13/2014) [+] (6 replies)
I got into the beta for elder scrolls online... Been playing allll weekend almost non stop! It's awesome!
#156 - moewolf (01/13/2014) [+] (2 replies)
"don't go fiddling around with any cocks around here or we'll have a real BIG party."
#88 - jellykuba (01/13/2014) [+] (9 replies)
I hear the "I might be the Dragonborn" a lot more then any of the others.
#52 - numbertwozeldafan (01/13/2014) [+] (31 replies)
I ******* Hate Markarth so ******* MUCH that I make it my personal mission to kill everyone who can be killed in that town and set it ablaze. Seriously; **** Markarth.

It's not even a random hatred: I genuinely detest that town (mostly because of the conspiracy) more than any other in that game, or any Elder Scrolls game for that matter.
User avatar #93 - JuliusC (01/13/2014) [+] (5 replies)
i see everyone bought skyrim during the holiday steam sale
>.>
i did too
cant argue with all dlc for only 35.99
#142 to #93 - TheForbiddenOne (01/13/2014) [-]
I got it for like 20 something.
User avatar #47 - threetoedsloth (01/13/2014) [+] (1 reply)
Here's a link to the author's Deviantart page if anyone's interested... she does some really good stuff!

You need to login to view this link
User avatar #48 to #47 - threetoedsloth (01/13/2014) [-]
*artist's
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