Someone PLEASE help make sense of my exgirlfriends actions. ()
submitted 4 months age by f
TL; DR - My boyfriend kept his wealth a secret from me throughout our entire relationship. I ended the relationship
on the pretext that he wasn' t money/ career motivated, he didn' t say anything to the contrary. if
I  have been dating Will [) for most of 2014; I met him on New Years Eve, we exchanged numbers,
scheduled a coffee date and have been seeing each other ever since. He' s tall and shy, with long thick hair like Eddie
Vedder. He lives in an older house by himself and drives a 1997 Toyota. He dresses very casually - I don' t think he
even owns a collared shirt - and all his clothes are minimum years old. For income, he told me he "ran a few
websites" and picked up as a 'session guitarist'. He is also very frugal. He never took me out for fancy
dinners or anything. In the beginning it was always coffee dates, walks, hikes, etc. If we go out, he insists on Tre-
drinking' and refuses to buy drinks at a bar. Most nights he was content staying in, watching Netflix and playing his
I never outright asked how much maney he made, but given his lifestyle, clothes, furnishings, etc. plus the fact that
he rarely worked, I assumed it wasn' t much. I would lightly prod him with questions about the future, if he had any
career goals - he would say that he "saw me in his future", but also he was "happy the way things were".
I have Facebook and am on it every day, usually when work is slow. Lately my newsfeed has been filled with my peers
getting married, buying houses, having babies, and other various accolades. I can' t help but feel Jealous by this; it
seems like everyine but me is making significant gains in their lives and relationships. Three weeks ago, after seeing a
girl I knew from high school buy her rrd property with her husband, it felt like my relationship with Will was Juvenile
and had no future.
The next time I was ever at Will' s (after he served me potato soup for dinner and was torrenting a documentary for us
to watch later) I ended the relationship. I was perfectly honest about everything - he was a great guy, I loved him and
his personality, but I felt he lacked career/ life ambition and we wanted different things for the future. He sat and
listened to everything, seemingly unmoved by it. When I finished talking, he said "fine by me" and asked me to leave.
I went to hug him on my way out, instead he Just guided me out the door and slammed it shut behind him.
With prior boyfriends, we' d still talk or text a bit after we' d be broken up. Sometimes we' d even still hook up. I dunno,
I' Just never had a 'bad breakout' and always try to remain en good terms. I haven' t heard a fucking word from Will,
even after texting him multiple times and calling him ence.
I saw two of Wills friends at the gym today. I went ever and made small talk, asked how he was, etc. I tried to explain
myself, saying he was a great guy but em views on maney and the future didn' t seem to mesh. To this, ene friend
chuckled to himself and walked away. I asked the other friend that' s about it, and he says "Yeah, we heard, The
thing is, Will' s leaded. He inherited his grandpas land which is leased to oil and gas companies. I' seen the quarterly
checks he gets and they' re mere than my yearly salary. Good luck getting him to spend it, though. He has a 'if it aint
broke, dent fix t type mentality. Just look at that piece of shit he drives!"
This has completely baffled and upset me. I dated him for 10 months when I thought he was penniless, proof I' m not
a fucking . I am a 26 year old woman who needs to be pragmatic, I can' t Just indefinitely date someone
with the future being so uncertain. He ' said something, ANYTHING during em break up when I was explaining
my doubts about em relationship. Instead he said nothing, and now he refuses to talk to me. It makes absolutely no
Ijust feel so low right now. If a man with disposable income meets a woman he likes, deosn' t he want to treat her? He
said he "saw me in his future", why didn' t he care enaugh to share these things with me? He could have easily kept
our relationship alive by being forthcoming. Someone please help me make sense of this situation.