Please Read My 1st FanFic? (Link Works). !!LINK WORKS NOW!!! www.fimfiction.net/story/10966/Chronicles-of-Roxas%3A-Birth-By...-Amnesia%3F- Password: roxas This  I love my bronie
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Please Read My 1st FanFic? (Link Works)

Please Read My 1st FanFic? (Link Works). !!LINK WORKS NOW!!! www.fimfiction.net/story/10966/Chronicles-of-Roxas%3A-Birth-By...-Amnesia%3F- Password: roxas This

!!LINK WORKS NOW!!!

www.fimfiction.net/story/10966/Chronicles-of-Roxas%3A-Birth-By...-Amnesia%3F-

Password: roxas

This is my very first FanFic. It is about a pegasus pony named Roxas. He wakes up in the Everfree Forest with no memory at all except his name and his age. He does not know his past, his friends, or how he got his cutie mark. Follow along as Roxas threads his memories and friends back together, and stops a great, dark evil that threatens Equestria...

I mix elements and concepts from:
>Kingdom Hearts
>Final Fantasy
>My Little Dashie

Please read it, it's my very first FanFic.
*brohoof*

Pic Related: Roxas' cutie mark

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Views: 1555
Favorited: 0
Submitted: 02/16/2012
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What do you think? Give us your opinion. Anonymous comments allowed.
#41 - kapurass (02/17/2012) [-]
well done! I read the whole thing, very nice   
   
mfw reading about the parents
well done! I read the whole thing, very nice

mfw reading about the parents

#42 to #41 - dmtsmoker (02/17/2012) [-]
thanks for reading!   :D   
part 2 is under writing now, I plan it to be ready in 1-3 days   
here, have some Dash   
   
Brushie brushie brushie /)'3'(l
thanks for reading! :D
part 2 is under writing now, I plan it to be ready in 1-3 days
here, have some Dash

Brushie brushie brushie /)'3'(l
#43 to #42 - kapurass (02/17/2012) [-]
awesome, keep up the good work   
/)'3'(\   
   
also thank you, more Dashie for you too
awesome, keep up the good work
/)'3'(\

also thank you, more Dashie for you too
#39 - Rascal (02/16/2012) [-]
i read it all 9/10 out of ten
#1 - mrgreatreturns (02/16/2012) [-]
It's really good so far! (I'm about half way through chapter one, just thought you should be absolutely sure that someone is taking the time to read it :3 )
#2 to #1 - dmtsmoker (02/16/2012) [-]
Thank you! :D *brohoof*

I really tried hard making an intense and 20% Cooler story

Pic Related: You
#3 to #2 - mrgreatreturns (02/16/2012) [-]
I can see that, the first chapter was really good, the story was awesome!

However, I must say one thing.

Best Pony? Fluttershy.
#4 to #3 - dmtsmoker (02/16/2012) [-]
It's all opinionated. She's too shy for me I guess.
The story has an EPIC 4th chapter like I made Roxas' history 150% Epic!!!
#5 to #4 - mrgreatreturns (02/16/2012) [-]
I look forward to reading it, i'll get back to you when I have :D

Right now, i'm about half way through chapter 2, shouldn't take too long at all.

(For the record, i agree with you, there is no superior pony, it's just a friendly competition thing, like supporting sports teams)
#6 to #5 - dmtsmoker (02/16/2012) [-]
Thanks for reading it. :)
User avatar #7 to #6 - mrgreatreturns (02/16/2012) [-]
Wow, that was really good! (Up through chapter 4, I mean, I haven't finished it just yer)

It's pretty evident that you put a lot of thought into your OC pony, and that's not something many people can pull off!
User avatar #8 to #7 - dmtsmoker (02/16/2012) [-]
Really? I really tried developing him throughout, so as he re-experiences something he forgot, the reader AND Roxas will learn about him at the same time.
Chapter 4 ties in with My Little Dashie
User avatar #9 to #8 - mrgreatreturns (02/16/2012) [-]
I noticed that, it's a good idea, although (it seems to me that) some of the aspects of your version conflict with some details of the original authors. Not a big deal, just thought I should bring that to light. So far the stories quite fun to read!
User avatar #10 to #9 - dmtsmoker (02/16/2012) [-]
Yea I debated whether to change that or not, but eh its FanFic. Did you like chapter 4? That was the hardest one to write.
User avatar #11 to #10 - mrgreatreturns (02/16/2012) [-]
I did, actually! Just finished the last chapter, and it's looking good!


I know what you mean, there's always a specific chapter of any fic that is, to put it simply, a bitch to write. XD
User avatar #12 to #11 - dmtsmoker (02/16/2012) [-]
lol right?
I'm going to start writing up a sequel tomorrow.

And I think chapter 5 is a good rap up with a good battle scene
User avatar #13 to #12 - mrgreatreturns (02/16/2012) [-]
If I may ask, how long did it take you to write that story?
User avatar #14 to #13 - dmtsmoker (02/16/2012) [-]
2 days:

1st day:
>Organizing thoughts
>Chapters 1 & 2

2nd Day:
>Chapters 3-5
>Side Notes
>Promoting it
User avatar #15 to #14 - mrgreatreturns (02/16/2012) [-]
You wrote all of that in less than two days?
User avatar #16 to #15 - dmtsmoker (02/16/2012) [-]
Yea.
Why is that, good?
User avatar #17 to #16 - mrgreatreturns (02/16/2012) [-]
Well, seeing as I started my fic last year, and I only have 6 chapters out, that's quite good!
User avatar #18 to #17 - dmtsmoker (02/16/2012) [-]
Oh, thank you.
So out of 100%, what would you grade it?
User avatar #19 to #18 - mrgreatreturns (02/16/2012) [-]
Hmm... at least a 90, although I'm terrible with evaluations, it's probably more XD
User avatar #20 to #19 - dmtsmoker (02/16/2012) [-]
And can you tell me your favorite 3 things out of this list?
1) The combat
2) His childhood history
3) Him and Rainbow Dash
4) Zecora's speech (That was hard to think of, lol)
5) The plot as a whole
6) The dialogue between characters
7) How well portrayed the characters were
8) The Mega Rainboom
9) Originality
10) Character development

Thank you :)
User avatar #21 to #20 - mrgreatreturns (02/16/2012) [-]
Probably... 5, 6, and 9.
User avatar #22 to #1 - dmtsmoker (02/16/2012) [-]
Thanks. Did you like how Pinkie Pie sang Zecora's song XD
User avatar #23 to #22 - mrgreatreturns (02/16/2012) [-]
Haha, I did notice that! XD
User avatar #24 to #23 - dmtsmoker (02/16/2012) [-]
I'll read yours when its done :) Ill start outlining part 2 now
Im adding u as friendpony
User avatar #25 to #24 - mrgreatreturns (02/16/2012) [-]
Alright, man, sounds good! :D
User avatar #26 to #25 - dmtsmoker (02/16/2012) [-]
what is yours about?
#27 to #26 - mrgreatreturns (02/16/2012) [-]
Well, it's the aftermath of Trixie's visit to Ponyville. She feels sad, someone notices, that same someone takes her under her hospitality, the two become friends (Nothing more, I don't feel comfortable writing shipping) and some more **** happens, but that's all i'm telling you >:D
User avatar #28 to #27 - dmtsmoker (02/16/2012) [-]
Seems awesome.
I cant wait for the read
User avatar #29 to #28 - mrgreatreturns (02/16/2012) [-]
www.fimfiction.net/story/73...

There's chapter one, for whenever you're ready.
User avatar #32 to #29 - dmtsmoker (02/16/2012) [-]
it was go-- it was great! I love how it picks up right where the story leaves off, making it easy to refer back to. Also the imagery and how they both acted fits their personality. Very well done 1st chapter!
User avatar #30 to #29 - dmtsmoker (02/16/2012) [-]
I'll brb
User avatar #33 to #31 - dmtsmoker (02/16/2012) [-]
it was go-- it was great! I love how it picks up right where the story leaves off, making it easy to refer back to. Also the imagery and how they both acted fits their personality. Very well done 1st chapter!
#34 to #33 - mrgreatreturns (02/16/2012) [-]
Haha, thank you!
User avatar #35 to #34 - dmtsmoker (02/16/2012) [-]
Well, im going to bed, inform me when chapter 2 releases. goodbye
User avatar #36 to #35 - mrgreatreturns (02/16/2012) [-]
Oh, dude, the first 6 chapters are already out.
User avatar #37 to #36 - dmtsmoker (02/16/2012) [-]
oh okay. ill read them tomorow, ill inbox you my thoughts. goodnight
User avatar #38 to #37 - mrgreatreturns (02/16/2012) [-]
Good night!
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