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Astral Porjection

 
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Submitted: 05/01/2012
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Comments(139):

[ 139 comments ]
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#14 - kumabear (05/02/2012) [-]
>be 19
>on first tour
>literally sleep with a gun under my pillow
>hear reports of men dying mysteriously on base
>killed in their sleep which causes rumor of a local monster attacking us
>be talking to some little kids and giving them chocolate
>notice red stain on kids shirt
>report to CO who says says to put pots and pans tied to strings around our beds
>MFW pots and pans clang
>OpFor was using kids to kill us
User avatar #23 to #14 - ChippiAble (05/02/2012) [-]
what did you do to the kids?
User avatar #46 to #23 - kumabear (05/02/2012) [-]
built them a barracks on base, locked it from the outside at night, basically just housed and fed them, they were orphaned by the war so the OpFor was feeding and housing them in exchange for killing us, once we started doing the same they weren't eager to lose their source of care
#47 to #46 - ChippiAble (05/02/2012) [-]
oh ok, thumb'd you up for your awsome story
User avatar #48 to #47 - kumabear (05/02/2012) [-]
thank you good sir
#26 to #23 - anon (05/02/2012) [-]
Ate them.
User avatar #6 - mrfourtysevenman (05/02/2012) [-]
i woke into an AP and i knew i wasnt sleeping cuz ******* family matters wuz on. anyway i look up and see through the couch and see my body. look down nothing but black
NOPE.
get back into body
hear a vvhispering voice talk but wisper at the same time (i did not know this was possible until after experience and i tried talk-whispering) it said
hello
i think to myself "did i imagine that?"
the voice says "no"
goes on to explain it's existance but is mubling
NOPE.
wiggle my toe, come to, some strong force is pulling me back to sleep.
feelsgoodman.jpg
OH GOD NOPE.
wake up with all my might
get up astonished
text friend
eat a burrito
****
fap
User avatar #24 to #6 - ChippiAble (05/02/2012) [-]
What a happy ending. :)
#56 - daednevar (05/02/2012) [-]
if they were watching you sleep, and they turned around and came towards you
were they walking backwards?
#65 to #56 - anon (05/02/2012) [-]
herp, he wasnt in his physical body. which they were watching. so they turned around to his astral body and came towards it
User avatar #33 - lolwutthef (05/02/2012) [-]
>be 13
>falling asleep
>hear my name form the hallway
> stand up and walk to close the door
> look back for some reason
>see myself sleeping
> WTF?
>look back at the door
>black tall figured looking at me
>not freaked out, but exited. black figure points at me sleeping
> ask what is happening
>wake up with sleep paralysis
> **** .jpg. start to freak out
>see black figure again. waves good-bye
>BLACKOUT
>tell mom next morning
>mom says it was only a dream
> been trying to do it ever since but no success
> okay.jpg
#72 to #33 - anon (05/02/2012) [-]
Damn *******
+32
#45 to #33 - TheShitPickle **User deleted account** has deleted their comment [-]
#38 - scottysglasses (05/02/2012) [-]
As a kid I used to sleep a lot, which is natural for a kid, like naps in the middle of the day. Sometimes though, i thought even when i wasn't sleepy my body forced itself to the point of makign me feel dizzy tryign to make me go to sleep ( bare in mind i had over 10 hours a day sleep) and sometimes I'd see something step in front of me as I drifted off.   
It only happened 4 times, 3 in the old house, 1 in this one. I'd wake up at a late time, like 10 or 11pm, and i could hear my parents downstairs watching tv. I obviously walk downstairs as i don't want to be upstairs alone as i couldn't fall back to sleep.   
As I walked down the stairs my legs would lose control, I'd tumble, hitting the wall then floor. At the top of the stairs was a black figure, like a shadow, an outline of a man. He'd start walking down. Me, then 			********		 bricks crawl my ass to the door to the living room hoping to make it, each time I'd black out. It wasn't until the last time years ago my Mom actually heard me banging on the door with me on the ground reaching to get inside. We had talks about what I saw, or thought I saw. I seen a lot of strange 			****		 as a kid and don't know if it was my imagination or the theory that children can see ghosts/demons unlike adults
As a kid I used to sleep a lot, which is natural for a kid, like naps in the middle of the day. Sometimes though, i thought even when i wasn't sleepy my body forced itself to the point of makign me feel dizzy tryign to make me go to sleep ( bare in mind i had over 10 hours a day sleep) and sometimes I'd see something step in front of me as I drifted off.
It only happened 4 times, 3 in the old house, 1 in this one. I'd wake up at a late time, like 10 or 11pm, and i could hear my parents downstairs watching tv. I obviously walk downstairs as i don't want to be upstairs alone as i couldn't fall back to sleep.
As I walked down the stairs my legs would lose control, I'd tumble, hitting the wall then floor. At the top of the stairs was a black figure, like a shadow, an outline of a man. He'd start walking down. Me, then ******** bricks crawl my ass to the door to the living room hoping to make it, each time I'd black out. It wasn't until the last time years ago my Mom actually heard me banging on the door with me on the ground reaching to get inside. We had talks about what I saw, or thought I saw. I seen a lot of strange **** as a kid and don't know if it was my imagination or the theory that children can see ghosts/demons unlike adults
User avatar #8 - SgtObvious (05/02/2012) [-]
If that ever happens again, just take out your dick and start fapping. They'll be so confused they'll leave you alone.
User avatar #128 to #8 - manueldomingues (05/02/2012) [-]
OP reads your comment and trys to do it, what actualy happens:

>demons see you fapping
>they like it (they represent evil, 1 deadly sin is lust, fapping is pure lust)
>they get an even worse smile
>they rape you and torture you instead of instantly killing you
>????
>profit

yeah.... dont do that, i know it´s just a joke but, discussing this in a more seriously way i would NEVER do that, i would piss my pants and run for my life, also if they caught me i would try to take one with me...... sorry for the long text, i know it was just a joke but i want to write >:)
User avatar #31 - personalreality (05/02/2012) [-]
i'm an avid astral projector/lucid dreamer. been doing it for years. had those experiences the first few times.

it's a projection of your unconscious mind. as far as your mind is concerned, AP/OBE is an unnatural experience. in truth, it's the most natural thing ever. but our lives of fast paced entertainment (ie the internet) and instant gratification have made us complacent and addicted to "waking reality". it's kind of like how morpheus tells neo when they're in the "gatekeeper training program" (the one with the woman in the red dress) that most people in the matrix are so addicted to it that they are unable to live without it and will fight to stay in it. point is, your unconscious mind sees AP/OBE/Lucid Dreaming as the same thing, a threat to it's sense of what reality is. so, in order to defend itself, it creates our deepest fears (which for most people in the world is based on superstitions of demons, devils and other "evil" things) to greet us as we cross that threshold into the "otherworld" or the dreamtime (the place that australian aboriginals believe all life is born from, the place that carl jung believed archetypes existed in).

or you could be superstitious and believe that there are actually demons there to attack you because AP/OBE is unnatural and against "God's Will". whatever. but i'll tell you this, once you understand how addicted your own mind is to the monotonous drone of daily life in "waking reality" and the lies you're told by those you have faith in, you can overcome them and experience a reality beyond anything you could imagine. I suggest you keep at it. but that's just me. i very well may be dellusional and bat nuts crazy. who knows.
User avatar #35 to #31 - maadmai (05/02/2012) [-]
LT;DR
User avatar #36 to #35 - personalreality (05/02/2012) [-]
acceptable
User avatar #39 to #36 - maadmai (05/02/2012) [-]
just kidding! :D totally agree by the way! once you convince yourself it's just in your mind it slowly dissapears, then you can enjoy flying and ****
User avatar #43 to #39 - personalreality (05/02/2012) [-]
also, for OP and anyone else who cares...

You need to login to view this link

the best AP forum out there. very helpful.
User avatar #58 to #35 - sphighderman (05/02/2012) [-]
Long tale; did read?
User avatar #57 to #31 - bazingaman (05/02/2012) [-]
That sounds deep and **** , but when I lucid dream I **** any woman close to me.
User avatar #159 to #57 - personalreality (05/04/2012) [-]
also a mental trap. i had the same problem as well (thought i didn't hink of it as a problem at the time). but trust me, if you can get past all that, there are wonderous moments to be had. it really widens your perspective in waking life.
User avatar #5 - beardedtoads (05/02/2012) [-]
All of this is created by your imagination, that being said don't try it.
User avatar #66 to #5 - MenstruelSandwich (05/02/2012) [-]
You used italicize... I have to ask... why not try it? Imaginations are harmless - its a dream essentially no?
User avatar #136 to #66 - beardedtoads (05/02/2012) [-]
well it's just straight up a bad experience.
User avatar #1 - theaddviser (05/01/2012) [-]
how do you do it? I want to fight demons
User avatar #2 to #1 - nukacolamayhem (05/01/2012) [-]
en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Astral_projection
I looked it up on Wiki since I was curious.
User avatar #3 to #2 - theaddviser (05/01/2012) [-]
thank you. FOR THE ALL FATHER!
#11 to #1 - anon (05/02/2012) [-]
You're an idiot
User avatar #55 - CiaranPM (05/02/2012) [-]
What the hell is astral projection?
#60 to #55 - perdyismysheltie (05/02/2012) [-]
Where your soul and body separate. That means I can be laying on my bed physically, but I can be wondering around my house. It is kinda freaky.
User avatar #61 to #60 - CiaranPM (05/02/2012) [-]
Riiight.
#67 to #61 - anon (05/02/2012) [-]
Go **** yourself who are you to judge other people's beliefs
+1
#74 to #67 - linkDrkguy **User deleted account** has deleted their comment [-]
+1
#85 to #60 - kelciekupkakes **User deleted account** has deleted their comment [-]
#97 to #85 - perdyismysheltie (05/02/2012) [-]
I don't know, but there is a site somewhere, where a lady talks about her trips every night. She can travel the world and so on. She can even visit her past lives. All I know about the site is that it has a blue background. I want to do it, but I don't know how.
+1
#102 to #97 - kelciekupkakes **User deleted account** has deleted their comment [-]
#110 to #102 - perdyismysheltie (05/02/2012) [-]
Yeah, but it takes a long time to just leave your body. Before then you need to start meditating or something. I just couldn't find the time.
0
#114 to #110 - kelciekupkakes **User deleted account** has deleted their comment [-]
#123 to #114 - perdyismysheltie (05/02/2012) [-]
Yep, but I still try. I will die try at least.
#59 to #55 - tvrulestwo (05/02/2012) [-]
A mental state when your mind leaves your body... myth.

btw not sure if trolling but still trying to be a nice chick

#52 - RoyalMillard (05/02/2012) [-]
Sleep ?? What Sleep...
User avatar #9 - gihadflab (05/02/2012) [-]
does this remind anyone of the movie Insidious?
User avatar #10 to #9 - skipnips (05/02/2012) [-]
Only because both the movie and the post involve astral projection.
#4 - batgod (05/01/2012) [-]
I'm not an avid believer in this sort of thing, but it seems the best thing you can do is not be scared. I've read that "negative entities" feed on your "energy", and a very easy way for them to do that is if you're terrified of them. I also read that you can call upon "good entities" to help you, but I currently view this all as fiction and I'm not sure if it would work at all.
User avatar #145 - assdoreponyfucker ONLINE (05/02/2012) [-]
What i read:
<Be 14
<very interested anal project
User avatar #7 - formerlvtwoeight (05/02/2012) [-]
I think i might've pooped a little.
User avatar #80 - supersparta (05/02/2012) [-]
that's a pretty boring and fake story bro
#41 - punchanun (05/02/2012) [-]
well im not sleeping tonight thanks funnyjunk brothers and sisters
also duck tape thread?

User avatar #162 - ZoeZamboni (05/11/2012) [-]
Ever seen "Insidious"?
User avatar #54 - foelkera (05/02/2012) [-]
8 yrs old
Asleep one night
Wake up
See a hooded man
Mottled brown skin
No facial features
Engage blanket defenses
NOPE self to sleep
#101 - zzforrest (05/02/2012) [-]
The first thing I thought of was this.
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