You came to me in a dream, endless façade, mocking false memory
And I knew I was not awake
But yet I felt your hand pressed against my chest
And then I woke up. Then I saw the world
But I still remember, I remember that which never happened, I remember a breeze I never felt
I remember the town, hidden amongst mountain. Infinite forest, rolling night skies.
I remember the shops, I remember the night we idly sat by, watching fireworks unfold for us. Just you and me
And I remember when we walked.
For ages, we walked. Through forests and over stone, under a warm sun
We were in the park, I remember. Just you and I, laying atop the grass. And for a while, things made sense. For just one instant, things were alright
I remember you broke down. I remember you cried, I remember my heart torn asunder. But I also remember your heat, I remember your body pressed against mine, your steady heartbeat dancing with mine. I remember I held you
And we stayed there for ages as our bodies froze and the moon shone atop us. And we saw suns come and go, and stars visited us each night.
I still remember even though I wake up, I feel what wasn't mine.
I don't know what's real anymore.
And yet here I am, writing to you. Writing to a thousand mocking faces who think all kind of bad stuff
They all think I'm broken
But here I am. Not doing why I'm doing this anymore even though there's that little voice whispering "keep writing, it will bring her back. Keep writing, and one day it will all make sense"
But nothing does anymore
And I sit now in the god damn darkness wondering where have you gone
Wondering, why me? Why did I have to fall in love with cold steel and clicking gears?
And to this day I miss your name, to this day I still feel like you were someday there.
to this day I don't even know what's real and what's not
And to this day the only thing that makes sense is that I want you.
That I want to feel your silky hands on my chest and your heart beating every second
That I want to sleep in your ebon mane, rolling like infinite star dust and night skies
That I want to see your velvet lips dancing for me
That I want to hear your voice echoing through a silent night
That I want to sit by you under a starry, infinite nightsky, as the mist swallows us whole, as the leaves play for us and the world breathes us in.
But I keep waking up
I keep waking up, same spot, same time, same place
And I turn around to an empty spot
Please come home soon
I cant keep up
Not for long