(untitled). .. and then she found out she had a twin brother who was put up for adoption (untitled) and then she found out had a twin brother who was put up for adoption
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#1 - dahlirious
Reply +1161
(04/23/2014) [-]
and then she found out she had a twin brother who was put up for adoption
#207 to #1 - phaegitt
Reply 0
(04/23/2014) [-]
welcome to the internet.
#218 to #1 - dwarfman
Reply 0
(04/23/2014) [-]
#264 to #1 - demrogz
Reply 0
(04/24/2014) [-]
1000th thumb
#276 to #1 - checkedem
Reply 0
(04/24/2014) [-]
**checkedem rolled image** nice one *high five*
**checkedem rolled image** nice one *high five*
#287 to #1 - nought
Reply +2
(04/24/2014) [-]
congrats on 1000 thumbs
#79 to #1 - HarvietheDinkle
Reply +70
(04/23/2014) [-]
go on...
#166 to #1 - chibullsa
Reply +6
(04/23/2014) [-]
**chibullsa rolled image** hawt
**chibullsa rolled image** hawt
#164 to #1 - killerliquid
Reply +7
(04/23/2014) [-]
#51 to #1 - darkangeloffire
Reply +10
(04/23/2014) [-]
Comment Picture
#2 to #1 - jibb
Reply +14
(04/23/2014) [-]
thats how I thought this would end
#9 to #2 - sparkyoneonetwo
Reply +9
(04/23/2014) [-]
as did I
#3 to #1 - qauronexoforce
Reply +35
(04/23/2014) [-]
maybe if we turn this into green text...
#67 to #1 - kaboozle123
Reply +42
(04/23/2014) [-]
i too thought that was how this was going to end. but as i finished reading i remembered that i am not on funnyjunk reading a 4chan post. i am on funnyjunk reading a tumblr post.
i too thought that was how this was going to end. but as i finished reading i remembered that i am not on funnyjunk reading a 4chan post. i am on funnyjunk reading a tumblr post.
#204 to #67 - childofnephilim
Reply +4
(04/23/2014) [-]
Thank you for voicing the sum of that thought for me.   
   
My work here is done.
Thank you for voicing the sum of that thought for me.

My work here is done.
#203 to #1 - hudis
Reply 0
(04/23/2014) [-]
#132 to #1 - anon
Reply 0
(04/23/2014) [-]
420 likes blaze it
#13 to #1 - timmity
Reply +3
(04/23/2014) [-]
my twin brother or sister is dead
#105 to #13 - oceanfrank
Reply +6
(04/23/2014) [-]
tell me more
#168 to #105 - timmity
Reply +3
(04/23/2014) [-]
they were miscarried while I survived
#176 to #168 - oceanfrank
Reply +6
(04/23/2014) [-]
I'm super impressed.
#282 to #168 - ffinfinity
Reply +1
(04/24/2014) [-]
sorry about that, even if you never knew your sibling it is sad to know your twin died. Same happened to my sister
#5 to #1 - lordmacflurri
Reply +249
(04/23/2014) [-]
#239 to #5 - hipickausername
Reply +3
(04/24/2014) [-]
And then everybody died.
#261 to #239 - dyalibya
Reply 0
(04/24/2014) [-]
And some people came back from the dead
#15 - pappathethird
Reply +497
(04/23/2014) [-]
They must both really suck at sex if they have time to smalltalk
#74 to #15 - oaaaa
Reply -3
(04/23/2014) [-]
exactly. and how is she able to talk if he ***** her mouth / asshole? i or he is doing something wrong
#231 to #15 - emptysuperman ONLINE
Reply 0
(04/24/2014) [-]
I thought I was the only one thinking this. I treat sex like a ******* sport (lol pun). I go all out and am always trying to improve.
#246 to #15 - horsecrab
Reply 0
(04/24/2014) [-]
The best sex is sex that goes beyond just *******.

Sex is one of the most personal, intimate activities the human body can go through. ******* is one thing, but having sex with someone is something far, far better.
#93 to #15 - tarnis
Reply +1
(04/23/2014) [-]
you dont have any idea what you are talking about.
#101 to #93 - pappathethird
Reply +1
(04/23/2014) [-]
how so?
#104 to #101 - tarnis
Reply +1
(04/23/2014) [-]
If you have had a decent amount of sex you can clearly understand were there is room for this kinda ****. However being that the story states this is the first time between these two i kinda doubt its real.
#106 to #104 - pappathethird
Reply +1
(04/23/2014) [-]
You are absolutely right in both aspects. I wasn't trying to make a point. I was just trying to be funny
#109 to #106 - tarnis
Reply +1
(04/23/2014) [-]
131 thumbs says you were
#113 to #109 - pappathethird
Reply +1
(04/23/2014) [-]
I try my best
#115 to #113 - tarnis
Reply +4
(04/23/2014) [-]
#126 to #115 - pappathethird
Reply +1
(04/23/2014) [-]
Comment Picture
#127 to #126 - tarnis
Reply +2
(04/23/2014) [-]
I find your modesty sexy, and deeply arousing.
#153 to #15 - DrDanny
Reply +6
(04/23/2014) [-]
If you can't laugh with your partner during sex, you aren't doing it right
#154 to #153 - pappathethird
Reply +9
(04/23/2014) [-]
My sexual partners don't usually laugh.
My sexual partners don't usually laugh.
#155 to #154 - DrDanny
Reply +5
(04/23/2014) [-]
...is this a rape joke?
...is this a rape joke?
#156 to #155 - pappathethird
Reply +10
(04/23/2014) [-]
yes   
   
mfw
yes

mfw
#163 to #156 - mywood
Reply +3
(04/23/2014) [-]
sause?
sause?
#171 to #163 - pappathethird
Reply +1
(04/23/2014) [-]
I, robot.
#158 to #156 - DrDanny
Reply +2
(04/23/2014) [-]
8/10 would blow air out of my nose faster than usual again
#96 to #15 - jajathezombie
Reply +14
(04/23/2014) [-]
Sex gets like 7 times better if you're laughing your ass off during. A while ago I was hooking up with this girl who was on her period, and the entire time she's going down on me I'm making really bad period jokes. At one point she started laughing so hard she raspberried my genitals a strange, yet not unpleasant sensation.
#35 to #15 - ciacheczko
Reply +15
(04/23/2014) [-]
Well, maybe if you can finish in two minutes or so.... How are you not supposed to talk at all during a 2hour sex gallore? Damn right I chat with my man, we laugh at silly stuff, just like in the story.

Of course there also is the sexy talk which seems to be a bit more related, but that's an entirely another thing.

#262 to #35 - anon
Reply 0
(04/24/2014) [-]
You never had sex , have you ?
#295 to #262 - ciacheczko
Reply 0
(04/24/2014) [-]
Ohhh.... you're right, anon. The thing that I did for 2 hours whilst occasionally chatting with my man was actually pottery class all along!

Bitch, please.
#120 to #35 - anon
Reply 0
(04/23/2014) [-]
you lost all credibility when you said you have sex for 2 hours
#278 to #120 - penileburglar
Reply +1
(04/24/2014) [-]
You lost all masculinity when you think sex for two hours isn't possible.

No one says you're physically pumping for two hours straight, but with foreplay, some kinky stuff in-between, and a good two or three rounds (assuming you're not a minute man), two hours is not even remotely unreasonable.
#224 to #120 - blbrian
Reply 0
(04/23/2014) [-]
Of course it's possible. Wether or not it's still enjoyable is another matter
#211 to #120 - marinepenguin
Reply 0
(04/23/2014) [-]
It's incredibly possible. I've had a 4 hour session before. Granted I had to reload a few times...
#130 to #120 - ciacheczko
Reply 0
(04/23/2014) [-]
I say it from a female perspective. Yes, there ARE men like that and thank goodness for them.

Let me hit you with some knowledge. A man can learn how to control himself during sex. It's a technique known for ages, mainly in India and such, where a man could hold multiple wives. It was a written law that he's supposed to treat them all equally - therefore, also please them equally. And I know there are some excercises that allow to achieve that. Just like women can excercise their vaginas to tighten at will, sometimes really powerfully.

People who have some idea about sex and care about it could tell you a LOT of interesting stuff. Or you could look it up and read it yourself
#288 to #130 - necrophyxia
Reply 0
(04/24/2014) [-]
Let me hit YOU with some knowledge

I know this trick, so teach it to people you bed if at all possible. It's simple just clench your lower abs as tight as you can. IT won't affect the stroke, but the focus it takes to maintain tension will stave off orgasm indefinitely
#294 to #288 - ciacheczko
Reply 0
(04/24/2014) [-]
Few of them already can do it, I won't teach others how to have good sex. If someone sucks at it, it's not my problem, really ;P
#128 to #120 - anon
Reply 0
(04/23/2014) [-]
Probably means with foreplay involved. Sounds pretty regular to me with that included
#143 to #128 - ciacheczko
Reply +2
(04/23/2014) [-]
I mean literal penetration, bro. Foreplay is cosmetic.
#124 to #120 - anon
Reply 0
(04/23/2014) [-]
don't you?
#17 to #15 - thumbingthumbing
Reply +58
(04/23/2014) [-]
Not really, sex is really fun and enjoyable if you can have a laugh at the same time.
You realize that when you have one night stands all your life but then have a partner.

Comfortablenesssss.
#108 to #17 - tarnis
Reply +29
(04/23/2014) [-]
lets make ****
lets make ****
#256 to #17 - chillingbear
Reply 0
(04/24/2014) [-]
Everyone is different when it comes to their approach to sex whether it be one night stands or sex with your significant other. How you spend your time doesn't ******* matter as long as both are enjoying the moment.

Personally I can't imagine talking about such a mundane thing like birthdays during sex. I can talk all I want after, but when I am having sex? Bitch please I am showing how I feel with my body, accept my nonverbal delivery!
#271 to #256 - justanotherblablab
Reply 0
(04/24/2014) [-]
>Showing how I feel with my body

Could you put that in a more cliche way, please.
#297 to #271 - chillingbear
Reply 0
(04/24/2014) [-]
Probably not, but my point still stands.
#25 - rockergamer ONLINE
Reply +359
(04/23/2014) [-]
mfw sex has become so mundane that people can have small talk when doing it

mfw this generation is having sex at like 11 and i'm gonna be a wizard

mfw the only person that shared the same birthday as me was my uncle

mfw he's a wizard

mfw every sex related post

mfw my hand is my gf
#205 to #25 - infested ONLINE
Reply 0
(04/23/2014) [-]
It's not really the fact that it's mundane, it's just that if you're in a stable relationship for a while and you're just having some not so hardcore sex you can talk to each other about stuff.

Everyone else in this thread is right by the way, sex is pretty good, and sometimes it's really ******* awesome, but its nothing to spend your entire life clamoring for.

Pic semi related I guess
#260 to #25 - anon
Reply 0
(04/24/2014) [-]
I too will soon be a wizard, and I've no way of knowing if sex is no better than jacking off, or if its mind-blowing. Too bad it will always be a mystery
I too will soon be a wizard, and I've no way of knowing if sex is no better than jacking off, or if its mind-blowing. Too bad it will always be a mystery
#90 to #25 - turretbuddy
Reply +1
(04/23/2014) [-]
#111 to #25 - fuckingtrolls
Reply +1
(04/23/2014) [-]
It's cause ur fat
#217 to #25 - thiswasnttaken
Reply +1
(04/23/2014) [-]
**thiswasnttaken rolled image** tfw no gf
#26 to #25 - elgolas
Reply +4
(04/23/2014) [-]
me too to me sex is a sensual important act not to be taken lightly. i am still a virgin at 19 and i don't want to have sex till i meet someone i love. so i may become a wizard too
#270 to #26 - celestiusnexus
Reply +1
(04/24/2014) [-]
Totally agree. I'm enjoying life just by being a virgin and waiting for love.
#178 to #26 - anon
Reply 0
(04/23/2014) [-]
Dude, it's just sex, you're overvaluing a short physical encounter. Enjoy your life. That said, it's not big deal if you don't have sex either, just know that when you do it's not going to be some amazing thing that you can't get over.
#81 to #25 - SnacksJr
Reply +5
(04/23/2014) [-]
#28 to #25 - Jesusnipples ONLINE
Reply +34
(04/23/2014) [-]
You and elgolas should probably chill the **** out on the matter, it is not nearly as big a deal as you make it sound like. You're overvaluing its importance because you're virgins, once/if that changes you'll know what I'm talking about
#59 to #28 - minutes
Reply +26
(04/23/2014) [-]
While i am not as desperate as that guy, being a virgin, i can understand him. It may just be a small thing to have sex but it's something everyone around you seems to be getting really easily and often, while you miserably fail at it. It's like a basic human task which everyone wants to do and almost anyone is able to which makes it really painfull if you aren't.

I am only 18 and my situation isn't that bad to be honest, i know i will get laid in some time probably but i can still understand his feels.
#91 to #59 - kanduhuskedetder
Reply +3
(04/23/2014) [-]
Don't wanna break yout heart, but that's exactly what it is. A basic human task everyone instinctively wants to do.

Personally, that's how it went for me, you kinda get a sense for when a female (Don't know about males, they probably whip their cocks out) is horny for you and sends you signals. I was one of the early ones, and many of my guyfriends were nervous like you, but eventually it happened for them and it started to get a completely normal thing. You don't even brag about getting laid any more after a while.

Heads up.
#50 to #28 - Sethorein
Reply +14
(04/23/2014) [-]
you overvalue everything until you get experience with it... That's kinda human nature...
#29 to #28 - rockergamer ONLINE
Reply +3
(04/23/2014) [-]
After watching porn for at least a decade now I think I can confirm that sex feels great.

What am I supposed to do? Shrug and say "pffft sex isn't so great"?

#52 to #29 - rheago
Reply +15
(04/23/2014) [-]
Porn totally isn't an accurate respresentation of what real sex is like you know...
And like andovaredoras said : It's kinda overrated
#53 to #52 - andovaredoras
Reply +7
(04/23/2014) [-]
Well said.   
   
People think the real thing works like porn, but in the industry they pretty much have to work at least 12h just to produce one ''scene'' (so, like 20min?). It's all just an act, with the director yelling what to do next (dat perv.).
Well said.

People think the real thing works like porn, but in the industry they pretty much have to work at least 12h just to produce one ''scene'' (so, like 20min?). It's all just an act, with the director yelling what to do next (dat perv.).
#48 to #29 - andovaredoras
Reply +6
(04/23/2014) [-]
Sex is overrated.
Sex is overrated.
#99 to #48 - tehavatar ONLINE
Reply +3
(04/23/2014) [-]
yeah but all the happy hormones guys get when they look at boobs makes them think otherwise.
#95 to #48 - scandaldog
Reply +3
(04/23/2014) [-]
#47 to #29 - ScottP
Reply +3
(04/23/2014) [-]
In my experience, blowjobs aren't as good as everyone makes them out to be.
#233 to #47 - paraplegicdinosaur
Reply +1
(04/24/2014) [-]
And that isn't even real 100% of the time
#31 to #29 - elgolas
Reply +2
(04/23/2014) [-]
you should take porn with a pinch of salt. it is all for show. the only real thing is penis -> vagina part
#30 to #29 - Jesusnipples ONLINE
Reply +1
(04/23/2014) [-]
No you can't, not until you have it. You can't do it vicariously through a pornstar, it's something you've got to actually do to understand. I'm not saying sex isn't great, I'm saying that once you finally have it, you'll stop thinking about the fact that you're a virgin (because you won't be anymore) and then there won't be nearly as much societal pressure to go have sex, which will make you realize that even though it's pretty ******* awesome, it's not all it's hyped up to be
#32 to #30 - rockergamer ONLINE
Reply +1
(04/23/2014) [-]
So it's pretty great, but it's not that great?
#43 to #32 - rockergamer ONLINE
Reply +1
(04/23/2014) [-]
doctornick y u delete your comment?

that pizza comparison was pretty good
#44 to #43 - doctornick
Reply +1
(04/23/2014) [-]
Idk, I didn't feel like i explained it good enough.
#45 to #44 - rockergamer ONLINE
Reply +1
(04/23/2014) [-]
but it did tho
#46 to #45 - doctornick
Reply +1
(04/23/2014) [-]
oh well, at least you read what I wrote so I somewhat made a point
#33 to #32 - Jesusnipples ONLINE
Reply +1
(04/23/2014) [-]
It's great but it's not as mindblowingly awesome as people like to pretend it is
#42 to #32 - doctornick
0
has deleted their comment [-]
#263 to #28 - anon
Reply 0
(04/24/2014) [-]
I love that you threw "IF" in there
#84 - lazaman
Reply +181
(04/23/2014) [-]
"His penis literally inside my vagina"
Literally
WOW THANK YOU FOR SPECIFYING!
BECAUSE IF YOU HAD NOT, I MAY HAVE THOUGHT IT WAS METAPHORICALLY INSIDE YOUR VAGINA!
#138 to #84 - HomerSimpson
Reply -3
(04/23/2014) [-]
Shut up
Just shut up
it isn't a big deal
at all
#142 to #138 - chrispoot
Reply 0
(04/23/2014) [-]
Think again, humanity tends to make big deals out of logically no big deal things
#88 to #84 - legitimately
Reply +3
(04/23/2014) [-]
Comment Picture
#89 to #84 - turretbuddy
Reply +3
(04/23/2014) [-]
well with the feminazi definition of rape...
#85 to #84 - mikasuh
Reply +4
(04/23/2014) [-]
Comment Picture
#117 to #84 - NutHut ONLINE
Reply +7
(04/23/2014) [-]
It was used for emphasis.
It was used for emphasis.
#118 to #117 - lazaman
Reply +19
(04/23/2014) [-]
No
#121 to #118 - NutHut ONLINE
Reply +4
(04/23/2014) [-]
You just gotta feel the chill, man. Ya know?
You just gotta feel the chill, man. Ya know?
#161 to #118 - anon
Reply 0
(04/23/2014) [-]
Lost it.
Mind if I borrow that image forever?
#235 to #117 - lasmamoe
Reply 0
(04/24/2014) [-]
Literally no
#92 to #84 - jajathezombie
Reply +35
(04/23/2014) [-]
> For the first time in possibly ever someone on the internet uses the word "literally" correctly
> People get mad about it
#98 to #92 - halloweenwillcome
Reply +12
(04/23/2014) [-]
>You literally used the word literally   
So by your logic, I'm the second person possibly ever on the internet that used the world literally correctly, literally.
>You literally used the word literally
So by your logic, I'm the second person possibly ever on the internet that used the world literally correctly, literally.
#94 to #92 - lazaman
Reply +5
(04/23/2014) [-]
IT WAS UNNECESSARY!
She probably didn't even mean to use it right.
Tumblr users use literally in every other sentence.
They treat it like a ******* decorative word.
"He literally had brown hair"
That is correct sure, but it was not needed.
#136 - nightmarecorpse
Reply +148
(04/23/2014) [-]
>Tumblr   
>A penis inside a vagina   
>Not rape
>Tumblr
>A penis inside a vagina
>Not rape
#197 to #136 - AlanbalMIT
Reply 0
(04/23/2014) [-]
well it was okay since the girl was the one ******* him. If it was the opossite dude would be in jail.
#144 to #136 - spanishninja ONLINE
Reply +5
(04/23/2014) [-]
all of my this
all of my this
#141 to #136 - fuckoatmeal
Reply +9
(04/23/2014) [-]
#162 to #141 - arstya
Reply +13
(04/23/2014) [-]
Here you go.
Here you go.
#181 to #162 - helenwheels
Reply -3
(04/23/2014) [-]
Picture is bettter
#6 - learmy
Reply +36
(04/23/2014) [-]
Basically what they looks like...
#36 to #6 - fozzoul ONLINE
Reply -3
(04/23/2014) [-]
STOP
#97 to #36 - happypony
Reply +8
(04/23/2014) [-]
HAMMER TIME!
HAMMER TIME!
#7 to #6 - anon
Reply 0
(04/23/2014) [-]
the days of reckoning is upon you soon, lad.
#11 to #6 - anon
Reply 0
(04/23/2014) [-]
#100 to #6 - shion
Reply 0
(04/23/2014) [-]
wow i love ponys keep posting pls

the ponys my little friend is magic, so cool xD
#248 to #6 - somerandomrant
Reply 0
(04/24/2014) [-]
well, now we know there are 28 bronies on funnyjunk
#300 to #6 - thefrozen
Reply 0
(08/12/2014) [-]
WHAT IS THAT EVEN, LIKE, WHAT IS IT, WHUIT
#58 to #6 - focusrite
Reply +3
(04/23/2014) [-]
Comment Picture
#12 to #6 - madcoww
Reply +147
(04/23/2014) [-]
Stop thumbing down these pony posts you stupid *****! If you earnestly want to stop pony spam, stop feeding the goddamn trolls.
#23 to #12 - wonderglue
Reply +15
(04/23/2014) [-]
***** who the **** cares? if he wants to be a faggot then let him be. i see the levels as a faggot scale where 0 is a casual faggot and -344 is a successful self-made faggot.
let him have his ******* faggot thumbs for his ******* faggot levels.
#27 to #23 - katapage
Reply +5
(04/23/2014) [-]
***** just went full *****. Never go full *****.
#222 to #23 - doktorzombie
Reply -1
(04/23/2014) [-]
Has got a point you know?
#61 to #12 - soopfox
Reply +4
(04/23/2014) [-]
The sooner he reaches -400 the sooner we can get rid of him
#56 to #12 - abstractpink
Reply +4
(04/23/2014) [-]
You're a ******* retard, they want -400, let them ******* have it, it aint gon stop till someone ******* wins, you ass
#146 to #56 - chrispoot
Reply +2
(04/23/2014) [-]
Care to update me again, I tend to forget, what happens to a profile once it reaches negative 400?
I do recall something about a special badge, and/or colored text. This is, if my memory is correct of course
#148 to #146 - abstractpink
Reply 0
(04/23/2014) [-]
I'm not sure, some say you get a pink name. I'd like that myself, but I'm too lazy
#149 to #148 - chrispoot
Reply +2
(04/23/2014) [-]
Well, it would certainly fit your username.
#82 to #56 - bongldr
Reply +2
(04/23/2014) [-]
#39 to #12 - blokrokker ONLINE
Reply +2
(04/23/2014) [-]
Comment Picture
#139 to #12 - tanisrapedmygoat
Reply +1
(04/23/2014) [-]
if they reach -400 maybe they will stop trying to troll so ******* hard Atleast that's what I hope
#40 - fuggy
Reply +99
(04/23/2014) [-]
I thought this was going to turn out with them being twins or something.
#64 to #40 - thechosentroll
Reply +4
(04/23/2014) [-]
I think most of us did.
#65 - captainfuckitall ONLINE
Reply +85
(04/23/2014) [-]
I don't know whether it's really bad or really clever that my first thought was "Oh ****, they're gonna be twins, aren't they"
#86 to #65 - kanduhuskedetder
Reply +2
(04/23/2014) [-]
You're not alone.
#152 to #65 - thempc
Reply +3
(04/23/2014) [-]
it's tumblr, not /b/
#147 - infedel ONLINE
Reply +48
(04/23/2014) [-]
so is anyone going to address the fact that they where having small talk during sex?
so is anyone going to address the fact that they where having small talk during sex?
#150 to #147 - defender
Reply 0
(04/23/2014) [-]
small talk
small talk
#179 to #147 - thebaseballexpert
Reply 0
(04/23/2014) [-]
i think everyones addressing that fact you ******* illiterate
#187 to #179 - fearlessteacup
Reply +1
(04/23/2014) [-]
Bad punctuation, zero points for you.
#186 to #147 - majorandrew
Reply 0
(04/23/2014) [-]
So is anyone going to address that random ass gif?
#188 to #147 - Gandalfthewhite
0
has deleted their comment [-]
#221 to #147 - doktorzombie
Reply 0
(04/23/2014) [-]
At first I was disturbed but then I lol'd!
At first I was disturbed but then I lol'd!
#167 to #147 - angreif
Reply +1
(04/23/2014) [-]
That's what I've always done.
#159 to #147 - ncharlie
Reply +2
(04/23/2014) [-]
what even is that gif?..
#172 to #159 - herpehderpen
Reply 0
(04/23/2014) [-]
If you're looking for source, Yondemasuyo Azazel-san, TV release, probably from 2011, haven't seen the 2013 release yet.
#177 to #172 - ncharlie
Reply -1
(04/23/2014) [-]
thanks brah
#160 to #159 - anon
Reply 0
(04/23/2014) [-]
Seconded.
#10 - Maroon
Reply +24
(04/23/2014) [-]
That's also my birthday. Why wasn't I invited?
#190 to #10 - dogwars
Reply 0
(04/23/2014) [-]
Because you're going to die alone.