BAMF Cassowary. 'tis true. Cassowaries are badass. This right here is 7 feet of pure, unadulterated assholery. A cassowary can run at speeds up to / h and will
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BAMF Cassowary

'tis true

Cassowaries are badass.
This right here is 7 feet of pure, unadulterated
assholery. A cassowary can run at speeds up
to / h and will freakin' bulldoze anything
that gets in its way. Happily. See that dinosaur
helmet she' s got going? That thing will mess
you up. Also, she can jump high enough to
kick you right in the tit.
Oh, and she has a llcm claw on each foot.
Did you hear that? . 5 inches. Go
measure that. I' ll wait.
Yeah. YEAH, DID YOU SEE THE LENGTH OF THAT
THING? That thing can take off limbs. It can
disembowel a grown human. It can do these
things, and if will. Happily.
It even swims, IT SWIMS. Okay? Yeah, that' s
right. like you needed another reason not to
go in the water. Nobody wants to swim with a
leaping .
It has been named the deadliest bird in the
world and has the aggression of a Pmsing
dragon.
If confronted by a cassowary, you need
to stand tall, look it in the eye, hold your
ground, and die like a little bitch.
...
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Views: 32945
Favorited: 75
Submitted: 05/09/2013
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Comments(44):

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#1 - Tailsfan (05/09/2013) [-]
WERF FLAMMEN AT IT!
#21 - agentmoleman (05/10/2013) [+] (2 replies)
Good thing I brought along 20 health syringes..
#39 - ntxjoker (05/10/2013) [-]
Did anyone think of Boss Cass?
User avatar #4 - GrimTheRealReaper ONLINE (05/10/2013) [+] (1 reply)
'Cept i **** that bitch up in Farcry 3.
User avatar #11 - djjeroenski (05/10/2013) [-]
but does it lift?

it doesn't need to, does it?
#10 - nikkeem (05/10/2013) [+] (1 reply)
MF everytime i see one of those creatures
MF everytime i see one of those creatures
#42 - drhoffable (05/10/2013) [-]
ill just blow its heart out with a shot gun instead..
#24 - stabiloboss (05/10/2013) [-]
Comment Picture
User avatar #20 - subaqueousreach (05/10/2013) [+] (2 replies)
"And die like a bitch"

**** that, I'd pick up a stick and charge it, same way you're supposed to do to a cougar. I'd rip that wanna be dinosaur a new asshole before it got it's claws in me.
#34 to #20 - anonymous (05/10/2013) [-]
I don't think you grasp just how many pieces a cassowary is capable of tearing you into.
User avatar #22 - welfarekid (05/10/2013) [+] (3 replies)
Good thing I'm never going to Queensland
User avatar #28 to #26 - welfarekid (05/10/2013) [-]
Well, Goodluck.
I'm surprised you made it this far in that poison wasteland.
#43 - anonymous (05/10/2013) [-]
they die pretty easily in far cry three so no worries
User avatar #41 - gobnick (05/10/2013) [-]
actually for the most part they are docile, except when it comes to food or violence, that they respond to with pecking and kicking, and rarely has this bird killed anyone, the most gruesome death from this bird was the death of a small child because the bird kicked his neck while he was on the ground and severed an artery in his neck
User avatar #40 - blarghagh (05/10/2013) [-]
I'm pretty sure this is reposted, but it's a cassowary, how common are they, i'm pretty sure we don't need to know how badass they are, they're ******* birds. If it was a velociraptor, that would be pretty ******* sweet.
User avatar #38 - plutarkus (05/10/2013) [-]
They are awesome, i saw it live in miami's parrot jungle once. i got to touch it
User avatar #35 - LaBarata ONLINE (05/10/2013) [-]
Batman kicked one's ass.

He stabbed it with a poisoned hummingbird.
User avatar #33 - messerauditore (05/10/2013) [-]
i found an island full of them in far cry 3. i was more afraid of them than the 3 sharks that attacked me on my way to the island.
#5 - cydom (05/10/2013) [+] (3 replies)
******* HELL! If I add enough CUNTING swear words I can make this ******* comment ******* padded out and make it sound ******** EXTREME! Yea? You get me? YEA? But what if I make you reflect. MOTHER ******* REFLECTION PERIODS actually on the inside of this MOTHER CUNTING TEXT you will suddenly become ADDICTED TO IT, because that's how my strangely worded FACTS! FACTS ************ !! Come across. Yea? Not just attracted, ADDICTED. Yea, you see that bro? You see that and you react in the way I MOTHER ******* DICTATE!

I have not been a fan of these posts.
User avatar #2 - refreshingheroin (05/09/2013) [-]
sounds like my ex
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