BAMF Cassowary. 'tis true. Cassowaries are badass. This right here is 7 feet of pure, unadulterated assholery. A cassowary can run at speeds up to / h and will  dinosaursharkbir
x
Click to expand

BAMF Cassowary

Cassowaries are badass.
This right here is 7 feet of pure, unadulterated
assholery. A cassowary can run at speeds up
to / h and will freakin' bulldoze anything
that gets in its way. Happily. See that dinosaur
helmet she' s got going? That thing will mess
you up. Also, she can jump high enough to
kick you right in the tit.
Oh, and she has a llcm claw on each foot.
Did you hear that? . 5 inches. Go
measure that. I' ll wait.
Yeah. YEAH, DID YOU SEE THE LENGTH OF THAT
THING? That thing can take off limbs. It can
disembowel a grown human. It can do these
things, and if will. Happily.
It even swims, IT SWIMS. Okay? Yeah, that' s
right. like you needed another reason not to
go in the water. Nobody wants to swim with a
leaping .
It has been named the deadliest bird in the
world and has the aggression of a Pmsing
dragon.
If confronted by a cassowary, you need
to stand tall, look it in the eye, hold your
ground, and die like a little bitch.
...
  • Recommend tagsx
+454
Views: 34052
Favorited: 75
Submitted: 05/09/2013
Share On Facebook
Add to favorites Subscribe to walkerassassin Subscribe to fucking-science submit to reddit

Comments(44):

[ 44 comments ]
What do you think? Give us your opinion. Anonymous comments allowed.
#7 - dragonpaint (05/10/2013) [-]
**** THIS LITTLE *******
#1 - Tailsfan ONLINE (05/09/2013) [-]
WERF FLAMMEN AT IT!
#21 - agentmoleman (05/10/2013) [+] (2 replies)
Good thing I brought along 20 health syringes..
#39 - ntxjoker (05/10/2013) [-]
Did anyone think of Boss Cass?
User avatar #4 - GrimTheRealReaper (05/10/2013) [+] (1 reply)
'Cept i **** that bitch up in Farcry 3.
User avatar #11 - djjeroenski (05/10/2013) [-]
but does it lift?

it doesn't need to, does it?
#10 - nikkeem (05/10/2013) [+] (1 reply)
MF everytime i see one of those creatures
MF everytime i see one of those creatures
#42 - drhoffable (05/10/2013) [-]
ill just blow its heart out with a shot gun instead..
#24 - stabiloboss (05/10/2013) [-]
Comment Picture
User avatar #22 - welfarekid (05/10/2013) [+] (3 replies)
Good thing I'm never going to Queensland
User avatar #28 to #26 - welfarekid (05/10/2013) [-]
Well, Goodluck.
I'm surprised you made it this far in that poison wasteland.
User avatar #38 - plutarkus (05/10/2013) [-]
They are awesome, i saw it live in miami's parrot jungle once. i got to touch it
#36 - anonymous (05/10/2013) [-]
I remember when I saw my first cassowary in Far Cry 3. I stopped a minute to laugh at it for awhile because I thought it looked dumb. I then proceeded to initiate a battle with some pirates to gain a new outpost and kill a couple tigers.

I had just won and was just about to go and loot everything, when this ghastly screeching washes over poor Jason. He turns around and bam, rainbow gay bird in your face, tearing you to pieces. It finished of my health in like two hits
User avatar #35 - LaBarata (05/10/2013) [-]
Batman kicked one's ass.

He stabbed it with a poisoned hummingbird.
User avatar #33 - messerauditore (05/10/2013) [-]
i found an island full of them in far cry 3. i was more afraid of them than the 3 sharks that attacked me on my way to the island.
#32 - anonymous (05/10/2013) [-]
"Cassowaries are very shy, but when provoked they are capable of inflicting injuries to dogs and people, although fatalities are extremely rare." Google it :)
User avatar #20 - subaqueousreach (05/10/2013) [+] (2 replies)
"And die like a bitch"

**** that, I'd pick up a stick and charge it, same way you're supposed to do to a cougar. I'd rip that wanna be dinosaur a new asshole before it got it's claws in me.
#34 to #20 - anonymous (05/10/2013) [-]
I don't think you grasp just how many pieces a cassowary is capable of tearing you into.
#19 - evilkingganon (05/10/2013) [-]
**evilkingganon rolled a random image posted in comment #1976771 at Friendly ** #2 badass in the world
#12 - jessieroxx (05/10/2013) [+] (2 replies)
ahh stralia, what a happy place im in!
#5 - cydom (05/10/2013) [+] (3 replies)
******* HELL! If I add enough CUNTING swear words I can make this ******* comment ******* padded out and make it sound ******** EXTREME! Yea? You get me? YEA? But what if I make you reflect. MOTHER ******* REFLECTION PERIODS actually on the inside of this MOTHER CUNTING TEXT you will suddenly become ADDICTED TO IT, because that's how my strangely worded FACTS! FACTS ************ !! Come across. Yea? Not just attracted, ADDICTED. Yea, you see that bro? You see that and you react in the way I MOTHER ******* DICTATE!

I have not been a fan of these posts.
#9 to #5 - anonymous (05/10/2013) [-]
I dunno why you're getting red thumbs, have a green on me.
[ 44 comments ]
Leave a comment
 Friends (0)