why i carry. . My girlfriend asked me last night why I carry my gun around the house, what am I afraid of? I looked her straight in the eye and said, "The Decep
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why i carry

My girlfriend asked me last
night why I carry my gun around
the house, what am I afraid of?
I looked her straight in the eye
and said, "The *************
Decepticons." She laughed, I
laughed, the toaster laughed, I
shot the toaster, it was a good
time.
...
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Views: 32940
Favorited: 78
Submitted: 06/25/2014
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User avatar #2 - charagrin (06/25/2014) [-]
Except that every form of Transformers media in the history of ever has shown that a human weapon is as useful against a transformer as a dentist drill is against a mountain.
User avatar #9 to #2 - pasadenamudslide (06/26/2014) [-]
Magnesium rounds were used in the Michael bay movies and they seemed to work, but hey theres always nukes
#52 to #2 - dogziller (06/26/2014) [-]
not in michael bays movies.
User avatar #12 to #11 - Mustafa (06/26/2014) [-]
bro, what in the **** was that?

besides being glorious of course
#13 to #12 - chaosmaxis (06/26/2014) [-]
Beast Wars, old as hell but still funny.
#26 to #2 - twilightdusk (06/26/2014) [-]
Most transformers are the size of buildings though, this is one that's the size of a toaster like one of Soundwave's little minions or something.
#4 to #2 - waffies (06/26/2014) [-]
Actually, the soldiers in the Michael Bay movies do alright at the climax of each action scene. I mean they'd all die horribly if not for Optimus and Co., but they take a few enemies down each movie
Actually, the soldiers in the Michael Bay movies do alright at the climax of each action scene. I mean they'd all die horribly if not for Optimus and Co., but they take a few enemies down each movie
User avatar #32 to #4 - chimpaflimp (06/26/2014) [-]
We do not speak of the Michael Bay movies.
User avatar #35 to #32 - waffies (06/26/2014) [-]
Honestly they're not bad... they just have too much of Shia La-not-so-buff chasing tail
User avatar #37 to #35 - darkangeloffire (06/26/2014) [-]
I liked them too. 'cept Dark of the Moon pissed me off by saying "HEY GUISE WE GOT SHOCKWAVE, SHOCKWAVE'S GONNA BE IN IT, HEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEY WE GOT SHOCKWAVE!!!!!1!!11!" and then giving him one line, and killing him.
User avatar #50 to #37 - thelastamerican (06/26/2014) [-]
I just couldn't handle the gigantic planet appearing out of nowhere right next to earth and there not being a single problem with gravity. Cybertron was huge after all. Other than that... Y U kill my favorite autobot?
User avatar #61 to #50 - darkangeloffire (06/27/2014) [-]
Okay, of all the things that happen in any movie ever, why do people complain about the lack of gravity or physics realism in Dark of the Moon. It's a show about giant Alien Robots and people are worrying about gravity?

It just seems like a really pointless bit to get hung up over.
User avatar #62 to #61 - thelastamerican (06/27/2014) [-]
Ever since I started playing Kerbal Space Program I just about can't watch anything involving space without thinking: That's not how that works! It's partially me being proud of myself for knowing that, and partially me being disappointed in myself for not realizing how wrong was earlier.
But back to gravity and cybertron...
Something that big just appearing out of nowhere that close to earth would pull the planet appart. Mountians would fall over, plates would shift feet in seconds, every active volcano on the side of the planet facing cybertron would erupt from the mantle sloshing around. And when the planet dissipated earth's orbit would be erratic as **** . I don't watch very many movies because I've got two jobs. That means that I've got a lot of time to think about the movies I DO get to watch, witch means that I have a lot of time to nitpick. It's not that the movies are bad, it's just that I have too much time to think about them.
User avatar #60 to #35 - chimpaflimp (06/27/2014) [-]
The first one was decent enough, but the other ones should have been renamed "Shia LeBoeuoeuoeuoeuf whining about how much his life sucks, despite getting to hang out with badass alien robots", there are way too many explosions for them to be fun or exciting and a bunch of them aren't even the right ******* vehicle.
User avatar #10 to #4 - kevinator (06/26/2014) [-]
Silverbot, that ******* guy !!! Wasn't he with the autobots before?
#25 to #10 - chaosmaxis (06/26/2014) [-]
Nope he was with the preds first. Realized there were evil cunts, left and tried to convert Black Arachnea.
#7 to #4 - John Cena (06/26/2014) [-]
I have the guy in the foreground in a box somewhere and i'm amazed that it's the exact i don'thds even just **** it
User avatar #5 to #4 - charagrin (06/26/2014) [-]
I honestly don't remember them taking down even one normal transformer without using heavy ordinance.
User avatar #6 to #5 - waffies (06/26/2014) [-]
Aah, just looked it up. First movie, they claim to use SABOT rounds fired from 40mm grenade launchers, but no such weapons actually exist in the military apparently.

Second movie you're pretty right. I mean lots of shooting, but its heavy artillery that does it

The third movie has then sniping out the eyes on a few big guys, and i think they get up on one guys back and shove an explosive in his neck joints, but otherwise they use Tomahawk missiles and stuff.

And in the next movie, they just decided " **** it" and are giving Mark Wahlberg an alien-tech rifle
User avatar #63 to #6 - thelastamerican (06/27/2014) [-]
The asymmetric warfare stuff was getting a little old. We've been watching movies where we somehow miraculously win against highly advanced weapons for so long that I'm really pleased that they're taking this avenue.
User avatar #3 to #2 - istartedthewar (06/26/2014) [-]
Against a toaster sized transformer?
It'd be fine
#8 to #2 - citruslord ONLINE (06/26/2014) [-]
Comment Picture
#14 - springbok (06/26/2014) [-]
I will easily blend into your human society
#16 - metajunky (06/26/2014) [-]
Now's my chance

Grimlock is the best transformer
#36 to #16 - darkangeloffire (06/26/2014) [-]
That's not what Megatron looks like.
#57 to #36 - dogziller (06/26/2014) [-]
nor us that what omega prime looks like. scrub.
User avatar #39 to #16 - sovietsamurai (06/26/2014) [-]
YES!

FINALLY SOMEBODY AGREES WITH ME!!!!

I ******* loved the Dinobots ...

I loved how they were vicious as **** and powerful weapons, and hunted down Decepticons and **** and never showed mercy
#53 to #16 - greatgranpapy (06/26/2014) [-]
>Implying there's a possibility that the best transformers is not Grimlock
>Implying there's a possibility that the best transformers is not Grimlock
#23 to #16 - IamPinhead (06/26/2014) [-]
>implying it's not Tidal Wave

#30 to #23 - John Cena (06/26/2014) [-]
>implying Grimlock isn't better than practically any other transformer. ever
#27 to #23 - chaosmaxis (06/26/2014) [-]
Impling it isn't omega prime.
#56 to #27 - dogziller (06/26/2014) [-]
i love omega prime, and sharkbyte from transformers rid.
#31 to #27 - IamPinhead (06/26/2014) [-]
I used to have Ultra Magnus

I wish I could have made Omega Prime
#28 - chaosmaxis (06/26/2014) [-]
Tumblr.
#38 - thesilentwindow (06/26/2014) [-]
hfw shooting the toaster
hfw shooting the toaster
#59 - xxazeritsxx (06/26/2014) [-]
HFW toaster laughs.
#43 - John Cena (06/26/2014) [-]
He must be stoned as **** . Thinking he got a girlfriend.
#44 to #43 - deriax (06/26/2014) [-]
**** forgot to login..
User avatar #45 to #44 - gragasvlad (06/26/2014) [-]
It's time for you to use auto login
#48 to #45 - deriax (06/26/2014) [-]
My phone keeps forgetting that..
User avatar #49 to #48 - gragasvlad (06/26/2014) [-]
stab it into submission!
#51 to #43 - John Cena (06/26/2014) [-]
**anonymous rolls 36,247,579**
0
#54 to #51 - mesocorny has deleted their comment [-]
User avatar #41 - gaydolph (06/26/2014) [-]
this is the most reposted joke in all of repostia.
User avatar #58 to #41 - targaryren (06/26/2014) [-]
never seen it
User avatar #55 - frenulum ONLINE (06/26/2014) [-]
>inb4 stan smith shooting a toaster gif
#17 - zerith (06/26/2014) [-]
GIVE ME THUMBS!
GIVE ME THUMBS!
#64 to #17 - jacodpwns ONLINE (06/30/2014) [-]
Comment Picture
#65 to #64 - zerith (06/30/2014) [-]
Comment Picture
#20 to #17 - fzjoss (06/26/2014) [-]
**fzjoss rolled image**
Well you didn't specified which thumbs did you? Enjoy your thumbs my friend
#24 to #17 - mrbobert ONLINE (06/26/2014) [-]
Comment Picture
User avatar #18 to #17 - luddethebunny (06/26/2014) [-]
nooooo
#22 to #18 - John Cena (06/26/2014) [-]
"give me thumbs!"

*Thumbs down

you just gave him/her a thumb
it is a bait
User avatar #40 - foamytesquirrel (06/26/2014) [-]
You're an idiot who clearly made this up. We all know that transformers don't exist.
#42 to #40 - gaydolph (06/26/2014) [-]
but he said decepticons not transformers.
User avatar #46 to #42 - thelastamerican (06/26/2014) [-]
**** , I read that in meatwad's voice.
#47 to #46 - gaydolph (06/26/2014) [-]
is it possible not to?
-16
#15 - sekundab has deleted their comment [-]
-1
#33 to #19 - sekundab has deleted their comment [-]
#1 - shallowandpedantic (06/25/2014) [-]
**shallowandpedantic rolled image** Tv's face when
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