Dog Feels

It's been half a year since it happened, so I've decided to share this story with whoever will read it. This is just a simple, sad story, nothing spectacular.
>Be 2005
>Family decides to get a dog
>Older sister interns at a pound, go there
>Among the angry, barking dogs, there is an ugly brown dog lying down, staring at nothing
>Going "Kennel Crazy"
>Literally days until she would've been put down
>Family takes a closer look at her
>Her name is Lady, sign says she's a girl, but a typo says she was neutered
>I point this out, everyone laughs, we get her
I never knew if that was why we got her, but i always liked to think so
>Learn she hates other dogs, murderously so, but otherwise nicest thing ever
>Only bit if stepped on, never broke skin
>She fit into our family perfectly
>Fast forward 8 years, 2013
>Over the years, Lady bonded the most with my mom
>Loved us all, we all loved her, but she was my mom's dog
>Lady's 13 by this point, old as hell for a dog
>Lost all of her energy by this point, can't get up easily
>Huge benign tumors all over her body
>I said for a while that we'll have to put her down soon
>She stays alive for months
>Eventually my mom, my younger sister, and I all go to the vet with lady
>I volunteered, thinking that i would be helping my mom with lady's passing
>It's time
>Lady needs to be lifted into the car
>Energetic as fuck for about 5 minutes, then falls asleep in the seat
At this point, i saw myself as incredibly emotionally strong, but seeing this was breaking my heart
>Near silence as we get closer
>Arrive
>Go inside, staff is incredibly kind and understanding
>Kind of wish they weren't, felt terrible
>Go into the room
>Lady lies on the rug, my mom holding her head
>My sister and I on the side, watching
>She's stone faced, i'm barely holding back tears
>After a few minutes for closure, vet comes in
>Puts in a muscle relaxant, so she'd be still for the next shot
>Lady's twitching a bit, eyes closing, looks confused
>i fucking lose it, but pull it together a bit
>Vet leaves, I'm bawling freely
>Mom's sniffling, sister's still stone faced
>Door opens, time for the next shot
>Next, final shot goes in
>I lose it again
>Lady stops twitching
>She's gone
>I cry until I get home
>Mom joins me when we get back to the car
>Sister still silent
>Get home, sleep
Now my mom got a new dog, and i'm in college. When I go home I can't help but compare this tiny, smelly dog to Lady. It doesn't come close to matching up to her legacy. I feel bad.