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Could use the advice

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Submitted: 01/06/2013
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What do you think? Give us your opinion. Anonymous comments allowed.
#27 - lordnerevar (01/06/2013) [-]
Tell them "Okay," and go live on your own for two years. Missionaries get minimal contact, so you don't have to tell them crap. Only issue with that plan is money. I suggest starring in a porno as a masked vigilante/super stud and become a crime fighting badass so you can win the girl. You will also need a side-kick with a dildo strapped to his head, or this plan is sure to fail. Good luck!
User avatar #30 to #27 - lexivex ONLINE (01/06/2013) [-]
After much deliberation, I now think that is the way to go!
User avatar #32 to #30 - lordnerevar (01/06/2013) [-]
And you should invest in an arm-mounted cannon, much like Samus Aran's, that makes people orgasm when you fire at them. Trust me, it will save you a lot of hassle.
User avatar #34 to #32 - lexivex ONLINE (01/06/2013) [-]
Bahaha, an orgasm gun? How would that work?
#36 to #34 - lordnerevar (01/06/2013) [-]
Go watch a movie called "Orgazmo."
Go watch a movie called "Orgazmo."
#56 to #34 - Glitched (02/01/2013) [-]
What the movie Orgasmo.
#60 to #30 - lordnerevar (06/18/2015) [-]
Did you do it?
User avatar #61 to #60 - lexivex ONLINE (06/18/2015) [-]
I sure did! I just got back a few months ago. Everything is great now
User avatar #62 to #61 - lordnerevar (06/18/2015) [-]
Oh, so you went on your mission instead of telling your parents you didn't want to?
User avatar #63 to #62 - lexivex ONLINE (06/18/2015) [-]
I was talking about the whole being in a super hero porno. heh

In truth, I told my parents shortly after I made this post and in general things went just fine.
User avatar #64 to #63 - lordnerevar (06/18/2015) [-]
good to hear
I'm totally not stalking you or anything
.. heh
User avatar #1 - madkip (01/06/2013) [-]
Sacrifice a goat in your living room while chanting Satanic mantras.

Problems this will solve -
1. They won't think you're Atheist
2. You won't have to go on mission in 2 years
3. Goat meat for a week
User avatar #3 to #1 - lexivex ONLINE (01/06/2013) [-]
You have some good points sir
#15 - KungFuZerO ONLINE (01/06/2013) [-]
I know this is hard to hear, especially because they are your family, but if they dont love and accept you for who you are, they are bad people and worse parents
Be who you are and good luck.
User avatar #16 to #15 - lexivex ONLINE (01/06/2013) [-]
That's very true
#51 - IceViper (01/16/2013) [-]
tell them you are gay and when they freak out just be like "just kidding im only an atheist and they will be relieved
tell them you are gay and when they freak out just be like "just kidding im only an atheist and they will be relieved
User avatar #52 to #51 - lexivex ONLINE (01/16/2013) [-]
Bahaha, you have a great idea, my friend!
User avatar #11 - mournicate (01/06/2013) [-]
Tell them that being in a cult isn't for everybody. I'm sure they'll understand.
User avatar #17 to #11 - lexivex ONLINE (01/06/2013) [-]
Hehehe, I might want to use different wording
User avatar #37 to #17 - mournicate (01/06/2013) [-]
I can understand that you love your family, but it's important to tell them what you want. I would think that if they were really worth worrying so much about, they would understand. Worst case scenario, you have an opportunity to move on and pursue a life on your own. That or they murder you for heresy. Philistine.
User avatar #38 to #37 - lexivex ONLINE (01/06/2013) [-]
Yeah, I realize now may be the time for a complete "pulling back of the curtains" on my somewhat sheltered life. Nothing is puppies and rainbows. I'm gonna hurt people, and they're gonna hurt me
User avatar #39 to #38 - hebs (01/06/2013) [-]
i wish you luck and hope everything ends well
User avatar #53 - jiraiyasannin (01/16/2013) [-]
Just ******* say no, I am Atheist and if you can't respect me for that, than you truly don't love me.
#42 - TehNinjaOkina (01/07/2013) [-]
If your family can't accept, love and support you for who you are. Then they aren't your family and are not worth your consideration and compassion.
User avatar #2 - dearleader (01/06/2013) [-]
Just lay it out there plain, explain why you believe what you do and why you don't believe what they do. I am atheist and one of my friends is mormon and one of our mutual friends is catholic. So long as everyone is respectful about it, it shouldn't be a big deal really
User avatar #4 to #2 - lexivex ONLINE (01/06/2013) [-]
That's what I'm hoping for. My current plan was to wait until I can support myself, and THEN tell everyone, so if need be I can separate myself from them for a while. Kind of difficult when I say "Hey, everything you've tried to teach me about religion, I don't agree with!" and then have to have breakfast with them the next day
User avatar #5 to #4 - dearleader (01/06/2013) [-]
yeah, sounds awkward but day-to-day activities should be fine, i'm atheist, my mom is baptist (no not westboro), and my stepdad is non-denominational. and we get along just as well as everyone else i know
User avatar #6 to #5 - lexivex ONLINE (01/06/2013) [-]
How old were you when you told them? How did they react?
User avatar #7 to #6 - dearleader (01/06/2013) [-]
14, and after i explained my reasoning they were cool with it
User avatar #8 to #7 - lexivex ONLINE (01/06/2013) [-]
If you don't mind my asking, what were your reasons?
User avatar #12 to #8 - dearleader (01/06/2013) [-]
not a problem at all. My beliefs are that Religion while useful is a relic that should take a step out of the spotlight. In the dark ages when Religion came to power it was useful as a bandage to explain things that were unexplainable. Now religion attempts to contradict science when science has evidence supporting its claims. I also have trouble believing that any monotheistic religion can be correct. Monotheistic religions believe one all powerful and all knowing entity created everything. Nothing is perfect ever under any circumstance. Take Protestant christianity. "God created heaven for humans. God created Earth to give to humans. God created humans. God must test humans to see if they are worthy of heaven." Why would a being go through all that extra work when it could just create the humans worthy of heaven and place in heaven to begin with.
User avatar #14 to #12 - lexivex ONLINE (01/06/2013) [-]
Yep, that's pretty similar to what I think.

Now, do you think telling them now would be better or worse then telling them when I'm 19, right before I'm suppose to go on a mission?
User avatar #18 to #14 - dearleader (01/06/2013) [-]
Well it would probably be better to tell them before they start making cuts in their normal day-to-day lives to set aside funds for you on the mission if you aren't going to go but putting it off won't hurt any unless you never get around to it. Your conscious might eat at you while you wait.
User avatar #19 to #18 - lexivex ONLINE (01/06/2013) [-]
Yeah, that's the thing that really prompted this post. My mom just told me how she's gonna start putting money aside, even though she really doesn't have the funds. I love my mom to death, and it hurts knowing I'm gonna have to break this to her one way or another.
User avatar #22 to #19 - dearleader (01/06/2013) [-]
might help to tell them one-on-one starting with who you believe will take it the easiest, and asking they not break it to anyone else
User avatar #26 to #22 - lexivex ONLINE (01/06/2013) [-]
That may be the best way to go. Thanks for your help! I'll let you know how it turns out if I decide to tell them soon
User avatar #28 to #26 - dearleader (01/06/2013) [-]
ok, hope all goes well for you
User avatar #40 to #4 - dkiscoo (01/06/2013) [-]
It depends on how strongly into the church your family is. I personally waited until I was moved out and financially stable. This was just because my parents were religious crazies. The time I tried to not go to church they flipped their **** and stole the blankets from my bed. I went through the motions until then. I gotta admit it can be a lot of fun being an atheist at bible camp.
User avatar #9 - lunarlizzy (01/06/2013) [-]
They are your family, tell them what you believe and i promise that they will accept you. that is both the most stereotypical answer and the most solid one. You should feel the need to hide from the people who love you. You would be miserable on mission, and I'm sure that no one wants you to be unhappy.
User avatar #10 to #9 - lunarlizzy (01/06/2013) [-]
wow see where i said you "should" feel the need to hide etc, yeah i meant to say "shouldn't". that could have been a problem.
User avatar #21 to #10 - lexivex ONLINE (01/06/2013) [-]
Heh, figured as much
User avatar #13 to #9 - lexivex ONLINE (01/06/2013) [-]
That's a good point. Overall they've been very loving and nurturing, it's just that my mom (easily the most religious person) has said at certain times how distraught she'd be if any of her kids turned away from the church.
User avatar #20 to #13 - lunarlizzy (01/06/2013) [-]
that was before she knew your thoughts
User avatar #23 to #20 - lexivex ONLINE (01/06/2013) [-]
Yeah, doesn't necessarily make them less true. I love her to death, and I'm just so afraid of hurting her. I'm now realizing it's probably inevitable.
User avatar #24 to #23 - lunarlizzy (01/06/2013) [-]
it is; be respectful. my father, little sister, older bro, and i are atheist, my father even teaches evolutionary anthro, my mom is methodist
User avatar #29 to #24 - lexivex ONLINE (01/06/2013) [-]
Yeah, I think the best route may be just to figure out truly why I am an atheist, put it into words and all that, and then tell them
User avatar #31 to #29 - lunarlizzy (01/06/2013) [-]
i dont know if i can help you with that; ive never been anything but atheist. even when i explored religion, being atheist just always made the most sense
User avatar #33 to #31 - lexivex ONLINE (01/06/2013) [-]
Well thanks for the advice, I really appreciate it
User avatar #35 to #33 - lunarlizzy (01/06/2013) [-]
ain't no thang. welcome to the brotherhood haha
User avatar #57 - lunadw (02/13/2013) [-]
You shouldn't do something you don't believe or don't want to just to please them. tell them the truth, as your family they should love you no matter what, even if your beliefs are different then theirs
User avatar #46 - shemaledong (01/08/2013) [-]
My grandma is a Mormon, too.
My uncle was in the same situation like you.
However his despise of mormon believes and what he called a bias philosophy, he did go on the missionary. He went from Germany to the US and even though he hated the missionary work, he states that it was a life-enriching expirience.
Maybe you can take the experience and leave after you build up an indipendent life.
That would require a certain amount of recklessness and determination.
Both characterisations are not very honorable. So if you chose to keep it real, you should bear in mind that if your family does not support you in your decision, they value an imagination higher than you.
User avatar #47 to #46 - shemaledong (01/08/2013) [-]
On second thought. It might be the best thing to be just brutally honest.
Tell them. If you are truthfull, you are just. If they do not understand. Screw them.
It is your life after all.
User avatar #45 - yojo ONLINE (01/08/2013) [-]
I admitted it to my religious parents and very religious grandparents when I was just 11 years old. They took it well and they just stopped taking me to church or trying to teach me about their beliefs. As long as I'm as well-behaved as I've always been, they're happy.
#44 - bariumman **User deleted account** has deleted their comment [-]
User avatar #43 - ponchosdm (01/07/2013) [-]
send jobs applications or intership in the field of what you are studying to cover your expenses of living alone and away from any relative, dont ever open facebook or any other social network, return after the 2 years like you were on mission,if they ask anything, say you make a vow of silence to what you share with their god in that time, if you liked living alone then you have 2 years of experience, end your studies, live your life, travel, make a family, tell them what you did, and only agree them to meet your family after they agree to recognize your atheism, tell them you love them for who they are and not for what they believe in. and you want to share your new life with them
maybe i started to be incoherent, still good luck, and sorry for any english trouble you had reading it
#25 - fjbrowser (01/06/2013) [-]
go on mission to Amsterdam as they need the moral goodness stuff that your selling the most because of their ways, then just have a fun time, backpack Europe and **** , most people want to do that sometime in their lives anyway...
If you want talk to people in Europe about your situation, enlightenment for you and in some sense you tried to open someone elses mind to the religious stuff that your family wants to spread so you won't have to lie to them either about your religious conquests!
User avatar #41 - noideawhatimdoing (01/06/2013) [-]
Take 2 year vacation on their/the churches dime. Profit.
#59 - ddylann (05/07/2013) [-]
you gotta tell them as early as you can otherwise it will be worse
User avatar #58 - LookinHereWhy (02/24/2013) [-]
just tell them you're an atheist, pussy
#55 - anon (01/31/2013) [-]
be completely cool like "actually, I'm an atheist" and if **** starts boiling, be armed with religious hyprocritycal ******** like "don't judge others" and "your religion tells you to respect everyone" and throw their precious beliefs right in their faces. Beat them with logic
#54 - blakhawk (01/31/2013) [-]
Tell the truth. If they love you they will understand that and accept who you have become.
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