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#52 - thechosentroll (05/07/2013) [-]
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What a lucky coincidence. I have a cool story to tell.

So, I've been playing Dwarf Fortress for quite some time now. If you don't know what it is, it's basically SimCity, except bloody and bloody fun. The motto of the game is "Losing is fun" since you can never really "win" the game.

Anyway, I decided to try something new and do some modding ingame. After completing several custom races and making a species of meatballs that vomit blood all over you, called ************** , I decided to do something more interesting. I tried making a ressurection machine that brings dead dwarves back to life. That way I wouldn't have to train up a new craftsman or soldier every time the old one gets gutted by a goblin or falls into a volcano. So, I coded in the ressurection machine, made all the preparations and picked "alchemy" as the labor required to operate it, since it's not used for anything else. I ordered my dwarves to build the machine, got the corpse of a lucky "volounteer" and fired it up. The machine worked. Sort of. It disassembled the corpse into its' basic tissues and organs and then reassembled them into place. The problem is that I probably ****** up the code and the tissue wasn't connected into a creature - it was just meat, bones and guts floating in place. Then for some reason the parts spread out rapidly. The corpse ******* exploded. I don't even know how. That's supposed to be impossible. Luckily only one dwarf was harmed in the explosion - the one operating the machine. He was bruised and bleeding heavily. Why was he bleeding? Because his ************* right hand was ripped off and his left leg was crushed. Then the game slowed down, crashed and kept crashing every time I tried to generate a new game.

Sound farmiliar?

TL;DR version: I accidentally reinacted Fullmetal Alchemist in Dwarf Fortress. Then the game got pissed that I tried to play god and didn't let me do anything. Had to reinstall it.
User avatar #82 to #52 - garymotherfingoak (05/07/2013) [-]
fukken awesome.
User avatar #65 to #52 - royalwerewolf (05/07/2013) [-]
I ******* love you
User avatar #66 to #65 - thechosentroll (05/07/2013) [-]
Yeah, the meatballs that spew blood were an awesome idea. I should make those again. Maybe turn them into a race. They'll have their own civilisation that's built on blood.
User avatar #67 to #66 - royalwerewolf (05/07/2013) [-]
oh god yesh
but the resurrection machine
#68 to #67 - thechosentroll (05/07/2013) [-]
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I still think it could work. I just have to tweak it a bit. But later. Right now I'm trying to add magic items to the game and test something. There are kobolds in tha game. The little thieving bastards usually die off pretty quickly since they can't mine or build. They just live off of stealing. What if I made insanely powerful magic items and just left them out in the open for kobolds to steal? Would their survivalability increase? Would they become a force to be reckoned with? Find out in the next thrilling episode of Dwarf Fortress.

Also, before I try ressurection I should try something easier like turning water into wine beer.
User avatar #69 to #68 - royalwerewolf (05/07/2013) [-]
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