Redneck EMT Story
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Still awake. Might as well.
2 call fer shooting and stabbing semes in
2 "Well, which is WA shooting er a stabbing?"
2 "Both. We' re sending you and the . Si). is en scene and theme screaming fortwo ambulances."
2 get an scene of epic redneck family dispute gene horribly wrong
2 Rednecky is slumped against wheel of
2 a huge gash runs his right nipple almost to his right shoulder blade, exposing the lung
2 he' about dead
2 there' s a /30-/ 30 en the heed guarded by a deputy
2 Redneck B is facedown about yards away
2 well, he would be facedown if he had a face
2 Redneck B' s head has been explosively redistributed fer several feet in all directions
2 oh my god, what the fuck, barbecue
2 ignore headless cerise, help first unit en scene work Redneck A, whe predictably doesn' t make it
2 having a completely bisected lung tends to severely impact one' s survival potential
2 we still have fucking idea what transpired out there
Later that day-.
2 everybody gets to write statements forthe DA, which is typical fer homicides
2 deputy fills us in en what went down
2 Rednecky and Redneck B had a tiff ever same cute little machette
2 defending both his haner and hers, Rednecky pummels the unholy fuck out of Redneck B
2 thinking the matter settled, toward his truck
2 Redneck B picks himself up, dusts himself off and runs up behind Redneckasian a fucking huge buck knife
2 Redneck B proceeds to fillet Redneck A
2 Redneck A collapses, as is the custom when fatally stabbed
2 thinking the matter settled, Redneck B begins to walk away
2 unbeknownst to Redneck B, nobody kills Redneck A and gets away with it
2 his waite his feet, retrieves his dun rams his truck and fires a single round befire collapsing
2 boom, headshot and the crowd gees wild
Rednecks fucking scare me way worse than redguards.