Xenophobia?. ... or Anthropophobia?. h. ini' new stunts Milan universes so settim treat humans as a boring. dowel everyman species or even the mama and WEI spec
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Xenophobia?

 
Xenophobia?. ... or Anthropophobia?. h. ini' new stunts Milan universes so settim treat humans as a boring. dowel everyman species or even the mama and WEI spec

... or Anthropophobia?

h. ini' new stunts Milan universes so
settim treat humans as a boring. dowel
everyman species or even the mama and
WEI
species.
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AFTER YOU SHOOT IT
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WAITING
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your eye um you just
die
We are new
...
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Views: 41543
Favorited: 315
Submitted: 10/30/2013
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Comments(198):

[ 198 comments ]
What do you think? Give us your opinion. Anonymous comments allowed.
#89 - htmm (10/31/2013) [-]
"Our response to natural disasters is to just rebuild our buildings in the exact same places."
"Our response to natural disasters is to just rebuild our buildings in the exact same places."
#127 to #89 - sonofthedeepsouth (10/31/2013) [-]
Have I ever tell you the definition of insanity?

Citra is the one that made Vaas crazy
#96 - vpngtn (10/31/2013) [-]
#194 to #96 - fourtitwo (10/31/2013) [-]
I should have gone to bed an hour ago, I've just been sitting in my chair reading :3
I'm gonna be wasted tomorrow...
#14 - jaevel ONLINE (10/31/2013) [-]
A collection of these kind of stories, for those who would like!
#122 to #14 - swedotcom (10/31/2013) [-]
Man, I love stories like theese! Thanks a bunch!
#157 to #14 - dereken (10/31/2013) [-]
/tg/ writes the best **** .
#193 to #14 - fourtitwo (10/31/2013) [-]
If anyone can give me the title of a novel that goes along these lines, I will ram a thumb so far up your rear, you'll be pissing green for weeks.
I now realise that sounds kinda weird... Imma just gonna post it anyways ^^b
#79 to #14 - personz (10/31/2013) [-]
I have a lot more if you want them.
#15 to #14 - jaevel ONLINE (10/31/2013) [-]
#16 to #15 - jaevel ONLINE (10/31/2013) [-]
#17 to #16 - jaevel ONLINE (10/31/2013) [-]
#18 to #17 - jaevel ONLINE (10/31/2013) [-]
#32 to #18 - kingofthenoobz (10/31/2013) [-]
its been a long time since i have read something that made me laugh so enjoy 5 thumbs
#33 to #32 - jaevel ONLINE (10/31/2013) [-]
My pleasure!
My pleasure!
#65 to #18 - megpoidgumibear (10/31/2013) [-]
i'll keep an eye on you, and i'll love you more than a dog.
#1 - mudkipfucker ONLINE (10/30/2013) [-]
#34 - anon (10/31/2013) [-]
Pursuit Predation sounds just like what Slenderman practices.
Pursuit Predation sounds just like what Slenderman practices.
#113 to #34 - insaneguy (10/31/2013) [-]
pretty much dead on
User avatar #101 - whitie (10/31/2013) [-]
the entire mass effect series is an ego trip for humanity,

we're aggressive and expansionistic

we're the most overall usefull species ( by that i mean turians are 10/10 soldiers, asari are 10/10 biotics, salarians are 10/10 engineers, and humans are 8/10 in all 3 categories, not the best at any but the best overall)

we're innovative as **** (in the series all life in the galaxy uses medi gel, a human invention, as the standard for medicine less than 20 years after humans arrive on the galactic stage)

we're known to never give up under any circumstances

other species fear our immense power

we're the most genetically varied (which i find preposterous, brother and sister chimps have more genetic diversity than any two random humans, meaning the aliens would have to practically be clones) and therefore are the best test subjects

we have the galaxies 2nd best tactics and intelligence and the best diplomats

and finally our army is considered to be devastatingly efficient, it's considered to be able to stand toe to toe with turians in an all-out war, despite being described as a relatively small volunteer army with a low percentage of our population (3%) in active duty, the turian hierarchy requires all turian citizens serve actively in the military (100%) discounting children, the sick and the elderly it's a real percentage of (99.9%)
User avatar #106 to #101 - azumeow (10/31/2013) [-]
This is pretty true. Honestly, the ONLY reason Krogans didn't ********** humanity into submission on day one was because of the Genophage.

Also, as for the Salarians and Asari, their lifespans are their main advantages. Salarians burn twice as bright as humans (intellectually that is) but have as long, whereas Asari are nigh immortal compared to humans, meaning that an Asari raised by humans, or christ forbid Salairans, in the respective culture would be pretty much the most well-rounded monster the Galaxy ever saw. Just think about it: In the time that Asari are considered children, humans (and almost every OTHER species) live their whole lives. An asari child could easily rival Stephen Hawking, Tesla, Edison, and Einstein before they were considered an adult.

And Turians....they look cool, I guess.
#192 to #106 - fourtitwo (10/31/2013) [-]
If the human ingenuity is a racial trait more than a cultural one, than a salarian or an asari raised on earth, wouldn't necessarily be much different from one raised on their respective homeworlds. It might even hinder their progress, if they don't process information in the same way as we do. A great example would be a salarian. He could learn much, much more on his own, than he could from humans. Our culture might simply slow down his impressive cognitive abilities :b
#109 to #101 - rototornjik (10/31/2013) [-]
and then there is 40k.
User avatar #93 - kanatana (10/31/2013) [-]
"We poison our air and water to weed out the weak! We set off fission bombs in our only biosphere! We nailed our God to a stick! Don't **** with the human race!"
#141 to #93 - istalir (10/31/2013) [-]
Not just fission bombs, but Fusion bombs, and we weren't sure that they wouldn't ignite our atmosphere when we did.
User avatar #144 to #141 - kanatana (10/31/2013) [-]
True. I think I remember reading somewhere that the full power of the original hydrogen bombs were something like ten times as destructive as the designers originally thought they would be.
#129 - chaosnazo (10/31/2013) [-]
Hell yes.
0
#168 to #129 - beamersmack **User deleted account** has deleted their comment [-]
User avatar #170 to #129 - fauxshores ONLINE (10/31/2013) [-]
Never thought about Avatar that way. Thumb for you.
#37 - lysham (10/31/2013) [-]
Ok guys.why Humanity Bad ass Dump
User avatar #107 to #37 - mattdoggy (10/31/2013) [-]
Thanks for posting these
i always love reading them
especially the zone of madness one
User avatar #148 to #37 - lesolan (10/31/2013) [-]
It took me so long to read them all, and I thank you so much for it. I think I fell in love~! <3
#95 to #37 - heshua (10/31/2013) [-]
I just spent about 2 hours reading all of this
#115 to #37 - quesocnkane ONLINE (10/31/2013) [-]
oh my god this is cool.

I'm going to write this up in Word (Credit WILL be given) so I can just easily share this.

I might edit it slightly just to make it easier to read/more appealing.



I'll post a link to it in a few days if anyone is interested in this file.
#197 to #115 - lysham (11/01/2013) [-]
send me the link if u have done it   
 u better do it
send me the link if u have done it
u better do it
User avatar #176 to #115 - thekeeperofthumbs (10/31/2013) [-]
You do that.
#62 to #61 - lysham (10/31/2013) [-]
there's some funny i think
#69 to #68 - lysham (10/31/2013) [-]
i'm tired...
#71 to #70 - lysham (10/31/2013) [-]
hope u guys enjoy
#72 to #71 - lysham (10/31/2013) [-]
do people even want to read all this?
#77 to #76 - lysham (10/31/2013) [-]
im done
#98 to #77 - danilawleit (10/31/2013) [-]
Nice read(s?). That was awesome.
User avatar #135 to #77 - horsefear (10/31/2013) [-]
That was pure gold.
User avatar #118 to #72 - satrenkotheone (10/31/2013) [-]
I have actually read almost all of the things posted here... twice.
User avatar #195 to #72 - treefox (10/31/2013) [-]
yes
User avatar #153 to #71 - dabronydude (10/31/2013) [-]
holy **** that is good
User avatar #149 to #63 - warzon (10/31/2013) [-]
I read that in zaeeds voice.
User avatar #134 to #58 - dabronydude (10/31/2013) [-]
this **** is amazing, we have countless stories of aliens being the best so
this is refreshing.
#78 to #37 - lysham (10/31/2013) [-]
If u guys have something that i dont have pls share it
If u guys have something that i dont have pls share it
User avatar #90 to #78 - xxbutthurtxx (10/31/2013) [-]
Done reading all this stuff took me a while, thx for sharing.
#54 to #53 - lysham (10/31/2013) [-]
look at those purple lines
#55 to #54 - lysham (10/31/2013) [-]
such word
#57 to #56 - lysham (10/31/2013) [-]
User avatar #108 to #54 - sonicthefast (10/31/2013) [-]
You got sauce on this one?
User avatar #196 to #108 - lysham (11/01/2013) [-]
no sorry
#3 - oosulley (10/30/2013) [-]
Remnids me so much of this post
#158 - anon (10/31/2013) [-]
/pol/¨s sci-fi story
User avatar #163 to #158 - Firenter (10/31/2013) [-]
That's a good one right there!
#161 to #158 - xxhadesflamesxx (10/31/2013) [-]
thanks
thanks
#111 - killerblue (10/31/2013) [-]
>space orcs
>orcs
>c

OI get da boyz this is gonna be a WAAAAAAAAAAAAAGH!
#165 to #119 - killerblue (10/31/2013) [-]
Not enou'g dakka
#160 to #111 - MrDeadiron (10/31/2013) [-]
now you listen here you little green ****
#164 to #160 - killerblue (10/31/2013) [-]
OI wacha go na do, 'ummie. Cause we boyz ant afaid of kaos
#123 to #111 - warzon (10/31/2013) [-]
Time to move planets.
#169 to #123 - killerblue (10/31/2013) [-]
OI toe, whatcha do' 'ere, this is only fo da big boyz
#173 to #169 - warzon (10/31/2013) [-]
Finding the target range.
#175 to #173 - killerblue (10/31/2013) [-]
Silly toe nees more dakka if he gonna fight da boyz
#116 to #112 - acemcgunner (10/31/2013) [-]
by your side my brother
#121 to #112 - killerblue (10/31/2013) [-]
Krieg troopers are awesome
#125 - larknok (10/31/2013) [-]
If any of you guys have played Halo, I'm sure you are familiar with these cheeky little ******* . They breath methane, which was the Halo Sci-fi way of saying that "they breath really strange **** ."

But get this. There are very few elemental gases that are extremely toxic to life. Methane isn't one of them. But Oxygen? Oxygen is on par with Chlorine gas (if not worse) to the concept of life. In fact, when the first Cyanobacteria evolved [first oxygen producing species], one of the biggest reasons that they won out against other bacterial species is because Oxygen is one of the most toxic gases to organic compounds. It's highly reactive and it's the most explosive gas. You know what it means to "burn" something? In short, all it means is to "add oxygen" to it.

If we meet other species in Space, unless they also happen to breath Oxygen, they'll look at us and go:

Zimbo: Holy **** Quagzor, these ************* breath oxygen.

Quagzor: The **** ? Oxygen? Oh **** . Yeah, **** that planet and it's scary-ass fire breathing ************* . Let's go to Leyan 4 where they breathe a reasonable gas like Nitrogen.
User avatar #140 to #125 - armageddonite (10/31/2013) [-]
Grunts have an internal skeleton, and an exoskeleton which can only be pierced with immense strenght or a high-velocity projectile. They were still living like barbarians in their little methane-filled craters when the covenant found them.
User avatar #154 to #140 - heartlessrobot (10/31/2013) [-]
And we come in and pistol whip the **** outta them because they aren't worth the bullet.
User avatar #198 to #154 - armageddonite (11/06/2013) [-]
I agree with your tactics, good sir.
#132 - ninjabadger (10/31/2013) [-]
And then we run into a synthetic race.

User avatar #136 to #132 - armageddonite (10/31/2013) [-]
Saliva and mucus can be corrosive to metal. Spit into a vent and they are screwed.
#139 to #136 - ninjabadger (10/31/2013) [-]
If you mean a vent of some mobile platform, good luck trying.

If you mean some larger transport vehicle or facility, good luck getting close.

I mean even if you succeed it takes time to corrode or rust, and that's assuming they don't notice it. And it can be assumed that a synthetic race is exceptionally organized and intelligent. I also assume a synthetic race would be highly adaptive (as their creators probably were) as they can easily modify their hardware and use different materials to prevent such issues.
User avatar #143 to #139 - armageddonite (10/31/2013) [-]
if they run on electricity it could cause a short. Humans are the most stubborn creatures on the planet and will not be outdone by any creature. Where there is a will, there is a way.
User avatar #145 to #143 - ninjabadger (10/31/2013) [-]
Everything has a weakness I guess, although I still think synthetics would be the best adversary to the human race. Would be interesting to say the least.
User avatar #186 to #145 - armageddonite (10/31/2013) [-]
Synths? **** it, in going home and getting my Gatling laser!
#25 - helforce (10/31/2013) [-]
I have a couple of these.
#162 - misterstollo (10/31/2013) [-]
In order to increase muscle strength, humans tear their muscles to have to rejuvenate. Only to tear them again
In order to increase muscle strength, humans tear their muscles to have to rejuvenate. Only to tear them again
#185 to #162 - baitdoesnttalkback (10/31/2013) [-]
that sounds saiyan like
#103 - pineapplepeople (10/31/2013) [-]
One of the reasons humans are so badass is that it was necessary for our survival. We are surrounded by a diverse ecology that is effectively designed to kill us. We developed weapons because we couldn't defend ourselves otherwise, tools to protect ourselves, intelligence to counter instinct.
This would also prove true to other planets. The badassery of the dominant species would probably be related to the time it took them to establish dominance. Over the years, evolution creates and improves species. For one species to become completely dominant, it must be able to not only survive these other species, but also conquer them. If it is unable to do so, and is only marginally better, then it is merely the next best creature that any future species must be able to conquer in order to establish dominance.

TL;DR the longer life on a planet has been evolving, the more badass it's dominant species will be.
User avatar #99 - srskate (10/31/2013) [-]
Consider cheerleading for a moment.

Humans have a sport. It isn't always for glory or victory. It is merely to increase moral for other sports. Yet they risk the highest chance of injury on par with the other human sport known as "american foot ball."
User avatar #102 to #99 - lolzordz (10/31/2013) [-]
i dont think cheerleading is a sport...
User avatar #105 to #102 - srskate (10/31/2013) [-]
en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Cheerleading#Title_IX_sports_status

Most high school cheerleading is defined as a sport. Not just a sport, but a full-contact sport (i.e. it is more hard-core than soccer)
User avatar #117 to #102 - riverofchex (10/31/2013) [-]
Think of it as Happy Gymnastics- you'll feel better =]
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