Who would win?. .. what if the dogs are nice puppies and you are stereo typing?
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#50 - trystanvierra (12/04/2013) [-]
Fixed
#31 - newall (12/04/2013) [-]
people often forget that we are at the top of the food chain for a reason. Pitbulls CAN (not always, requires deliberate training, NOT nature.) be very aggressive. BUT, they are not the strongest dog. a human physically fighting for it's life, one, for example, as strong, and physically imposing, as Jason Statham, would probably win.

We have opposable thumbs. A single human of that size would EASILY overpower a single pitbull. two may be a challenge, but an Adrenal response has the very real possibility to cause a massive surge of strength, and, the ability to ignore incredible wounds.

My money is on the Male human.
User avatar #61 to #31 - commontroll (12/04/2013) [-]
Don't forget that when a dog attacks, it makes its neck come to you, it's vulnerable then. You get a dog in a headlock, and you can do anything you want to them. If you had a knife, you could end it quickly, no knife and you can do your best to quickly break the dog's spine, or crush its throat. Two will be a challenge for an unarmed man, but if they are in say, a forest, where he can climb and pounce, and have elevation against the dogs? Human wins hands down. Our other strong point is our brains. Throwing a dog off of a high ledge is a great strategy for fighting them.
#32 to #31 - iknowiwazthere (12/04/2013) [-]
Especially if that human is Kai Greene. Well maybe not, he's too damn nice.
#34 to #32 - newall (12/04/2013) [-]
kai greene is my ******* idol.

Seriously. i cant say why he didn't win the Arnold, but even without his physical appearance, he's the greatest personality in bodybuilding, and one of the greatest in sport, in general.

He deserves to be more popular than he is, a lot of people could learn a lot from him.
User avatar #67 to #34 - jaypaul (12/04/2013) [-]
in my book he wins with his dread alone. i'm mean, c'mon. just look at dem dur aesthetic braids. aww yiss
#36 to #34 - iknowiwazthere (12/04/2013) [-]
I agree entirely, one of the best videos to show his personality. www.youtube.com/watch?v=1hUSqvjjZ-4
Not many other people in the bodybuilding community would do that during a competition. Not to mention is fantastic posing routines. The head stand quad pose during last years Olympia was fantastic! lol
#40 to #36 - newall (12/04/2013) [-]
agreed. He's a genuinely nice guy. his routines are new, and interesting, if a little out of the ordinary, and his physique is flawless.

and let's be honest, the whole grapefruit thing is hilarious.
#3 - ZeGerman (12/03/2013) [-]
Dags.
#71 to #3 - disasterbater (12/04/2013) [-]
yea, dags.
User avatar #60 - commontroll (12/04/2013) [-]
Depends, is the human allowed to use simply tools? If so, most definitely the human. And if not, then if the human is trained in anything involving grappling, as soon as he incapacitates the first dog, he has definitely won.

Another thing is environment. An empty room with nowhere to climb or hide? That will be more difficult. However, it's not about having no bias. Humans succeed because our strength is situational awareness. Not to mention, a dog's most dangerous point is their head. They attack you and they're also putting their most vulnerable parts right at you.

In summary, if it was an empty field (room would be an advantage due to being able to jump off the wall to quickly change directions or jump onto one of the dogs) the human would be wounded severely, but would beat the dogs.

If the human was allowed to use simple tools (rocks, branches as clubs, possibly a knife or spear) then human hands down. Minor cuts and scrapes probable, completely unwounded possible.

If the human was not allowed simple tools, but was in a forest, or area with different elevations and hiding spots, again, human.

We're very very strong creatures. We just don't know our potential. And we're talking a human in prime condition, the cream of the crop. That means they can keep their cool. It also means they know how to fight smart. Our biggest strength isn't our muscles, it's the way our body works, and our brains. We can easily suppress animals with our bare hands without killing them, or kill them if we choose. We can grab them, choke them, break their legs, gouge their eyes, whatever, all while having our vital organs, neck, and brain at arms-length. Dogs cannot do this.

I've wrestled a pit bull before, it started as playing and then it began to panic and really tried to get out of my grip and it couldn't. There's a reason humans are the ones dogs follow, and not the other way around.

TL;DR: Humanity, **** yeah.
#5 - croc (12/03/2013) [-]
Depends, is the human horny?
#6 - furrysheaperd ONLINE (12/03/2013) [-]
what if the dogs are nice puppies and you are stereo typing?
User avatar #11 to #6 - zytherman (12/03/2013) [-]
There is nothing to mention fighting, I like to believe it means which would win in a belly rubbing contest.
#14 to #11 - Rascal (12/03/2013) [-]
The comment section of an internet webpage actually made me happy.

WHAT SORCERY IS THIS!!?
#7 to #6 - Rascal (12/03/2013) [-]
What if the prime human is a pacifist that refuses to harm animals?
User avatar #8 to #7 - furrysheaperd ONLINE (12/03/2013) [-]
what if all three are peaceful and have a lovely day at the dog park?
User avatar #9 to #8 - crazyolitis (12/03/2013) [-]
I vote for this option.
#69 to #8 - Rascal (12/04/2013) [-]
The City Council would like to remind everyone that dogs are not allowed in the dog park. People are not allowed in the dog park. DO NOT APPROACH THE DOG PARK.
User avatar #59 - guffspeak (12/04/2013) [-]
wtf is this **** .
We have established that humans are ******* monsters from the abyss. Set some conditions that would actually be a challenge. Like:

Who: Single naked Human vs Shark
Where: 15 ft of water over a reef
When: After the Human jumps overboard because he was caught banging the captain's wife.

OR

Who: Single Human vs Polar bear
Where: Arctic Circle
When: After kicking the shark's ass, the human swims to the arctic circle to nutstomp a bear because he wants white undies.

We are the Terminator's of Earth, Do not **** with us.
or we will make undies out of your fur.
User avatar #86 to #59 - hyeroshi (12/04/2013) [-]
I feel bad for the chinchilla that had its fur turned into underwear, but damn that **** is soft.
User avatar #56 - shroomftw (12/04/2013) [-]
Actually, that's just a stereotype. They're not all aggressive killers and fighters, some are actually quite nice. I own one and he's never attacked anyone and serves me loyally. Yes, not all humans are dangerous killers like they're made out to be.
#75 to #56 - kuros (12/04/2013) [-]
mfw i realize where your comment was going...
mfw i realize where your comment was going...
User avatar #43 - nurucio (12/04/2013) [-]
Depends on who raised the dogs. If the dogs were raised well, then the human would win (unless the human attacked the dogs' owners, because pit bulls are insanely loyal and will do anything for their mommies and daddies)
User avatar #79 to #43 - zomgwaffle (12/04/2013) [-]
LOL so much no. You're blinded by ignorance. I agree the way they're raised has a huge impact on the dog(s) but how well they're bred can have a much greater impact. There are many times pittbulls have turned on the people who care for them.
User avatar #81 to #79 - nurucio (12/04/2013) [-]
I have had many dogs who were pups from a long line of abused animals bred to fight in dog fights. None of them were nasty, at all, because we knew how to train the dogs properly. A lot of love goes a long way.
User avatar #84 to #81 - zomgwaffle (12/04/2013) [-]
I work at a no kill shelter. We have many dogs here that will end up living here until the end of their lives because of the abuse and neglect they've been through. We have an American Bulldog I'd love for you to come by and give your love to. Hell if you last 5 minutes with him I'll suck your dick dry.
User avatar #85 to #84 - nurucio (12/04/2013) [-]
Again, it depends on who RAISED the dogs and if they are raised WELL. I think you didn't read that part. Parentage has nothing to do with a dog's behavior if they're raised right.
User avatar #87 to #85 - zomgwaffle (12/04/2013) [-]
By no standards is this dog mean. He just plays very rough (I'd know he bit me twice in the leg). He was surrendered because his owners from my understand had some ****** luck and had to move to a much smaller place and couldn't have their dogs anymore. One was just fine and got adopted and the other obviously isn't. So come on by and show me your training abilities then if you live you can lecture me about how poor breeding isn't a factor in a dog's temperament.
User avatar #90 to #87 - nurucio (12/04/2013) [-]
I highly doubt I and my family could take the time to train every single job that needs it. We have only ever had one dog at a time, because we focus very intently on making the dog as happy and well behaved as possible. I don't say that we are the best, but we definitely believe that a dog trained well from birth can be amazing and loving, no matter how their parents were bred and treated.
The only dog we have ever had a slight issue with was a dog we adopted, he was abused so badly that the previous owners had broken his leg and done nothing about it, and now he can't use it to walk. The only issue we had was that he had insane issues with food, and would defend it, but he is well past that and we can easily take his food bowl away now, and he patiently waits for it to be returned.
User avatar #91 to #90 - zomgwaffle (12/04/2013) [-]
I was being sarcastic about you training the dog. This dog would tear you in half the second you get inside his run. Training a dog to let you take it's food is something we have to do with 1/4 of the dogs that come to us it isn't very difficult, luckily most of the problems an abused or neglected can be taught out of them.
User avatar #92 to #91 - nurucio (12/04/2013) [-]
Abuse does unfortunately often include a lack of food.
User avatar #93 to #92 - zomgwaffle (12/04/2013) [-]
You see a lot of possession issues with dogs that have been strays for long periods of time. When it's not severe keeping them in our office with a rawhide and taking it from them every couple minutes and returning it after a simple command is followed will have them rehabilitated by the end of the day.
User avatar #26 - somenerd (12/04/2013) [-]
The dogs would win unless the man used his greatest weapon. His rifle is the only thing he needs mind you.
User avatar #37 to #26 - brucekillah (12/04/2013) [-]
i see what you did there, it was clever
User avatar #21 - arsyro (12/03/2013) [-]
I'm 99% sure that Jason Statham can defeat anything that challenges him
#2 - solarisofcelestia (12/03/2013) [-]
Human. They're my favorite combat oriented species.
#17 to #2 - sinery (12/03/2013) [-]
Pony with brony inside joke outside of ponytime with 5 greens.
#30 to #17 - jimthesquirrelking (12/04/2013) [-]
...this doesn't make any sense
User avatar #74 - tonytails (12/04/2013) [-]
dogs. by far.
numbers, man. the guy might be able to hold his own against one, but two is a bit too much to handle.
User avatar #52 - formerlvtwoeight (12/04/2013) [-]
I don't get why people are so scared of dogs. Honestly, you're bigger than them and you can just kick them off of you. You have a good 100-200 pound advantage on them (Depending on your weight) and you can easily curb stomp a dog if it bites your leg or something.

Not that anyone would ever want to hurt a dog though. I ******* love dogs.
#55 to #52 - cokeymcsmokey (12/04/2013) [-]
yeah I agree, but instinctively they go for the neck, so if they even get a chance to get you there, you could be screwed if they puncture your throat.
User avatar #57 to #55 - formerlvtwoeight (12/04/2013) [-]
Yeah, if they bit your neck it would all be over
#54 to #52 - hxcwaywardson (12/04/2013) [-]
my buddy's dog has a good 50 pounds on me. he's such a pushover though, love that great dane to death
User avatar #58 to #54 - formerlvtwoeight (12/04/2013) [-]
Yeah, I used to have a dog that weighed like 145 pounds He passed away recently
But i've never seen a 150+ pound pitbull
User avatar #63 to #58 - commontroll (12/04/2013) [-]
Aren't they usually only about 70 or so pounds? Light enough that you could swing 'em into a wall, that's for sure. If you got a good grip at least.

I agree with you though, they're not that hard to beat. Protect your neck (which you will do instinctively) and put them in headlocks, stomp on them, etc. I love my dog, but if any dog comes at me viciously, I'm ready to kill it with my bare hands if necessary. They are predators, and they are dangerous. If I'm surprised by them, I lose my edge on them, which is my mind.
User avatar #46 - poetsofthefall (12/04/2013) [-]
Those pitbulls have been fed a diet of steroid dog food. The average pitbull evenif it's been trained and exercised, isn't that big.
#38 - Rascal (12/04/2013) [-]
Just one dog? The human.
Both dogs? Depends on who trained them.
#25 - Rascal (12/04/2013) [-]
such humen caus doges cant evn raed! wow
#13 - Rascal (12/03/2013) [-]
The sad fact is a decent kick could put a dog out of the fight .
User avatar #16 to #13 - mechaemperor (12/03/2013) [-]
True. A powerful kick to the ribs of a dog can really mess them up.

Also, noses are soft spots. A strong punch to the snout and they start sneezing like crazy.
User avatar #41 to #16 - mutzaki ONLINE (12/04/2013) [-]
They also have naturally smaller and thinner bones than we, and less flexibility. If they bite down on your arm or leg, you might go into shock and freeze up, but if you're prepared for it, you will continuously pummel at them until they break. You can also dig your fingers in their eyes or yank their tail really hard. The size difference simply outweighs the whole "dogs would win because" thing people throw out.
#24 - juffs (12/04/2013) [-]
The dogs

Holy **** the dogs

You have no idea how hard those dogs would win

Those dogs would win so hard, they'd win everything else just by proxy.
User avatar #27 to #24 - duvallwhitey (12/04/2013) [-]
What if the human didn't act human?
Maybe he would act so savage that we couldn't even call him "him"
So savage, we call the human "it"
Like an animal
User avatar #39 to #27 - Imbtrtenu (12/04/2013) [-]
Damn ***** you high as **** .
User avatar #62 to #24 - commontroll (12/04/2013) [-]
I think you underestimate how strong the human body is, and how many ways of fighting things we have. We're talking about a PRIME human. Top of the line. Imagine, Bruce Lee against two pitbulls.

Yeah, I think ol' Brucey would win.
#1 - kambin (12/03/2013) [-]
Depends on the dogs.
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