Tumblr comp. . twinkle twinkle little prick you have a really tiny dick stop shaming girls for who they screw just because it isn' t you gre‘ acurate: I can' t  Tumblr comp twinkle little prick you have a really tiny dick stop shaming girls for who they screw just because it isn' t gre‘ acurate: I can'
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twinkle twinkle little prick
you have a really tiny dick
stop shaming girls for who they
screw
just because it isn' t you
gre‘ acurate:
I can' t hang out tomorrow i' m too
busy doing nothing alone sorry
simmer
If I ever see you guys in real life
I' m screaming your URL as loud
as I can
I dare you.
one time this kid sneezed in
class and i said "goodnight"
basically my social skills
i seriously laughed at this hr like 3
years
it' s kinda funny how when you
get older you start to enjoy the
things you hated as a kid like
taking naps and getting
spanked
the second one was kind of
unexpected
but no one is disagreeing
I can hear my brother have sex with
his girlfriend next door and there is
just a lot of bed creaking and I just
heard her say 'Are you even trying?'
and I laughed so hard my brother
came into the room to tell me to fuck
off
taillow:
is that a knife in your pocket or are
you just happy to yeah fuck he' s got
a knife everyone run
my grandpa has a date tonight
and hes really old and in a
wheelchair and has to drag
around this breathing machine but
hes just sitting there waiting for
the hospice shuttle to take him to
pick up his date and he looks
SUPER EXCITED and its the cutest
thing Ne ever seen
update he came home and i asked
him how it went and he said, "i
should have taken an extra tank of
oxygen because she took my
BREATH AWAY"
today i accidentally dropped my
pencil and when i reached down to
get it i had this really awkward hand
touch with a guy that was going to
pick it up for me and he goes "oh i
see how it is" with a flirty face and i
panicked so i Just blurted 'Tm a
lesbian" and then he got really quiet
glammetal:
so i came up with a joke the other
day while i was showering
and it' s quite possibly the dumbest
thing We ever thought
but i laughed for a good tive minutes
out loud in the shower
my mom thought something was
wrong with me
okay here was an attorney defends
a man sued for walking around town
in his underwear. it was a brief
case.
mime
when i was in tth grade a boy liked
me but i thought he was annoying,
so on the playground he tried to ask
me to be his girlfriend and i said no
and i had to think of an excuse so i
started hugging a tree and i told him
the tree was my boyfriend. then later
i saw him kicking the tree and i felt
kinda bad
I THREW A GRAPE IN THE AIR
TO CATCH T IN MY MOUTH
BUT IT WENT TOO HIGH AND
HYTHE CHUNG AND THERE
WAS A SPADER THERE AND
THE SPIDER FELL AND SO
DID THE GRAPE AND THEY
BOTH LANDED ON MY FACE
AND I STILL HAVEN' T
STOPPED SCREAMING
read the first line in my head in
an tune clean me maybe rm so
stupid
I threw a grape in the air
I wanna catch it i swear
It hit a spider that tell
and now they' re on my has
I ALMOST GOT INTO A CAR
CRASH JUST NOW MY LAST
WORDS WOULD' BEEN "THAT
CLOUD LOOKS LIKE A DICK."
STOP REBLOGGING THIS YOU
ASSHOLES I COULD’ DIED
I) was
at salad
in int
still no!
we ll Its
we M
war
In my in
England and
gray m
Amara.
like you KIDDING
its no BEEN
THIS SINCE IRAS
mus use Ts
not
uemm
WHAT ABOUT CANADA.
may
WHAT ABOUT .. 2
one time this guy was hitting on me
and he said 'Tm loving the whole
blonde hair, blue eyes thing" and I
said "so did hitler" I literally said that
to a person
my Junie insect is ill! tty because " name is actually
what d 6003
so does a use
an yes. the allusive use known lo! owing
you have not
experienced true panic
until you come face to
face with an
overflowing toilet
at a trated' s house
During a lane): party.
And that' s the only bathroom.
And there' s a line.
what depths of hell did you guys
spawn from
true self control is waiting until
the movie starts to eat your
popcorn
why would the movie eat my
popcorn
in Mesh,?
...
+1773
Views: 76025 Submitted: 10/28/2013