The most horrific tard event. . Anonymous 10/ 3 f/ f 3( Thu) f 9: 1 f :53 No. 513691304 I witnessed the most horrific Tard event. in school ll!. chalking down c thatguywithpants 4Chan
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The most horrific tard event

Anonymous 10/ 3 f/ f 3( Thu) f 9: 1 f :53 No. 513691304
I witnessed the most horrific
Tard event.
in school
ll!. chalking down crowded
214 KB we corridor
tard holding sandwich
tard is known for flipping out violently and
a wrangler is nowhere to be seen.
Spuddenly, amongst the crowd, someone
bumps into the tard and knocks his sandwich
out his hand.
slice of ham lands on some quiet kid who is
by his locker
the horns of Jericho, the tard lets out
noise that could bring down the walls of a
fortress
two leaps on the quiet kid and tackles him to
the ground, eyes glazed over in feral rage
jpg
tard sinks his teeth into this kid' s upper
thigh, but somehow still roaring
allittle did I know, thta the quiet kid was
suffering from PTSD from a violent dog attack
flips his **** and unleashes an epic
fist combo into the tards face
PAS the punches keep landing, the tard' s face
is slowly becoming mushier and redder
tard increases his bite strengh and his
growl grows louder
quiet kid is now bawling his eyes out but
he doesn' t cease his furious punching
Xblood is beginning to be splattered about the
hall from the tard' s face
who bite mark is now flowing freely with blood
as well
llike lightning, the quiet kid grabs the tard' s
forehead with one hand and right hooks him in
the jaw with the other.
who tard flops off the kid and begins writing on
the floor, smearing blood and saliva
everywhere
tthe quiet kid looks at his bloodsoaked fists,
pukes and passes out (probably from the pain
of the bite)
he broke a tard' s jaw to free himself
the hallway looks like the *******
somme
at least 10 kids had to have counselling
after seeing this
Also, Tard stories general.
...
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Views: 37920
Favorited: 255
Submitted: 11/08/2013
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Comments(227):

[ 227 comments ]
What do you think? Give us your opinion. Anonymous comments allowed.
#73 - miia ONLINE (11/08/2013) [-]
and then quiet kid gets expelled for getting into a fight.
User avatar #79 to #73 - mayormilkman (11/08/2013) [-]
Thanks for posting this comment so I could read this amusing story.
#99 to #73 - usernamecannotload (11/08/2013) [-]
I hate the "zero tolerance" policy that schools have. When I was in school if someone attacked you and you tried to defend yourself, you would get in trouble and the attacker would not, and from what I've heard its gotten even worse since I graduated.
User avatar #117 to #99 - xxhadesflamesxx (11/08/2013) [-]
its even worse on weapons you can get suspended nowadays for drawing a picture of a gun or making a finger gun
User avatar #229 to #117 - ugottanked (11/10/2013) [-]
please tell me thats ********
User avatar #230 to #229 - xxhadesflamesxx (11/10/2013) [-]
nope its happened before in stupid schools but it still happened and if it happened once it will probably happen again
User avatar #231 to #230 - ugottanked (11/10/2013) [-]
..........
#111 to #99 - mummyslittlebitch (11/08/2013) [-]
Even before zero tolerance polices became a thing I got in trouble for that **** all the time. One time some slack-jawed redneck kid started beating me with a big stick on the playground while I was alone minding my own damn business. I blocked one of his swings and threw the stick away and told him to leave me alone, so he went and told a teacher that I stole his stick and instead of doing some investigative work they just gave us both after-school detention. Wasn't the only time **** like that happened to me. **** that school.
User avatar #186 to #111 - AnomynousUser ONLINE (11/09/2013) [-]
One time, when I was in 5th grade, some 6th grader started beating up my friend, and I saw that my friend was losing, so I ran up and hit/shoved him away with one move, so the 6th grader turned around, sucker punched me, and then the rest of my friends got to us and broke it up. The teachers didn't even know until some 3rd graders from the other side of the playground told on us. The little **** tried to say that I ran up from behind and started hitting him for no reason, but when the principal saw my black eye and heard my side of the story, I ended up getting a day or two of lunch duty while he had detention or suspension or some **** like that.
#104 to #99 - Visual (11/08/2013) [-]
My school degenerated into this new policy: People who crowd around a fight are contributors to the fight because they unintentionally block police and administrators from stopping the fight and are will be punished as well.
#201 to #104 - fullmetaloptimist (11/09/2013) [-]
I think my school has it worse. Even if you're nowhere near the fight, you'll get in trouble for not doing anything to try and stop it.
#156 to #104 - anon (11/08/2013) [-]
Eh, that's fair.
You are blocking the people in charge from doing their jobs.
User avatar #138 to #104 - zafara (11/08/2013) [-]
I think that's the law outside of schools, too, unless I'm mistaken.
User avatar #50 - ishallsmiteyou (11/08/2013) [-]
I have my own mini tard story, the kid ended up dying.
>in tech class
>no serious injuries 20 minutes in, a first for this class
>hear screaming coming from hallway
>think nothing of it, continue working on my strongbox
>screaming grows louder and louder, fire alarm goes off
>tard bursts through the doors and runs straight towards a table saw
>he ******* dives into the thing and it chops a section of his head off, leaving him unconscious and bleeding everywhere
He died in the hospital with a small chunk of his brain missing. Since then the school has instructed the tech teacher to keep the doors locked at all times.
User avatar #236 to #50 - aussiepridevil ONLINE (11/15/2013) [-]
naturalselection.sat
#153 to #50 - sabashii ONLINE (11/08/2013) [-]
Comment Picture
#95 to #50 - demicus ONLINE (11/08/2013) [-]
#110 - largilloquent ONLINE (11/08/2013) [-]
>be in 9th grade
>tard shows up mid year
>lesson starts to get real slow, so tard can follow
>bored.jpg
>his trigger word for anger is "socks"
>every no and again people would just whisper it and he would freak out
>DID SOMEONE SAY SOCKS
>one day the teacher says it mid lesson (dont remember why)
>ITS ALWAYS BEEN YOU!!!!
>teacher=wut
>tard jumps the poor lady and beats her unmercifully
>some kids in class restrain the fool
>mfw 1 is suspended and the other two are expelled
>mfw tard gets no punishment
#31 - tabarzins (11/08/2013) [-]
I would have passed out  from laughter
I would have passed out from laughter
User avatar #1 - stilch (11/08/2013) [-]
Great, but nowhere near as gooda s the story of Neal.
#59 to #1 - anon (11/08/2013) [-]
holy **** neal is that dude. I love neal.
User avatar #136 to #1 - punishlife (11/08/2013) [-]
Sweet jesus ******* christ. Thank you for opening my eyes to these epic events
#183 to #1 - KIKORBV (11/09/2013) [-]
Related to one of the stories! Uncircumsized!
Related to one of the stories! Uncircumsized!
User avatar #188 to #1 - ompalomper (11/09/2013) [-]
*sigh* oh neal, the lulz you brought...
User avatar #191 to #1 - ompalomper (11/09/2013) [-]
what about Fats McGee and his Retard Three?
not to mention the sequel "Fats McGee II: To Kill a Tardburd"
User avatar #192 to #191 - stilch (11/09/2013) [-]
Fats McGee was very funny, but I find some of the sentences incorrect. No way the planets can align to make such a story. But it was still a 9/10
User avatar #194 to #192 - ompalomper (11/09/2013) [-]
possible, but it's like boxcar joe the magic hobo, it's simply so amazing that you want to believe it is
#93 to #1 - fauxshores ONLINE (11/08/2013) [-]
BYE PILL!
#3 to #1 - strigt (11/08/2013) [-]
Do tell...I enjoy a good story.
User avatar #75 to #19 - twdeathnote (11/08/2013) [-]
Jurastard Park.

In space no one can hear you haypil.
User avatar #176 to #19 - daelril (11/09/2013) [-]
The most i've ever laughed with a green text
User avatar #232 to #19 - atheistzilla (11/10/2013) [-]
i want moar

gibbe moar plz
0
#233 to #232 - timelimit has deleted their comment [-]
User avatar #106 to #19 - pickstar (11/08/2013) [-]
This isn't full. I remember the full one ending with the fake baseball story. Unless this one is arranged differently.
#20 to #3 - phuquogh (11/08/2013) [-]
www.funnyjunk.com/channel/4chan/The+Story+of+Neal/qRzMGdE/

i wanted to post the picture but its too big, so here's the link. A lot to read, but it's worth it
User avatar #165 to #20 - olgregg (11/09/2013) [-]
It's been years since I've willingly picked up a book in years, but I read this as though it were the finest of literature. Excellent share.
User avatar #195 to #58 - dyllygaf (11/09/2013) [-]
This is the full one if anyone is interested
#234 to #3 - timelimit (11/11/2013) [-]
Alright so apparently I have a version that's longer than any of the others posted here.

static.fjcdn.com/large/pictures/34/84/348476_4749161.jpg

Here it is. Enjoy.
#21 - houseofbrick (11/08/2013) [-]
Y'know, I'm not a fan of treating people badly for things they have no control over, but why don't we do what Japan does with the mentally handicapped and send them to special schools to learn how to do simple labor? It makes sure they get employment and keeps them away from the rest of society at the same time, lowering the risk of there being cases like this.
Y'know, I'm not a fan of treating people badly for things they have no control over, but why don't we do what Japan does with the mentally handicapped and send them to special schools to learn how to do simple labor? It makes sure they get employment and keeps them away from the rest of society at the same time, lowering the risk of there being cases like this.
#29 to #21 - gisuar (11/08/2013) [-]
germans did it too at least that separating part didn't teach them anything though just killed them
User avatar #41 to #29 - houseofbrick (11/08/2013) [-]
out of curiosity, are you trying to subtly compare me to Hitler or are you just referencing the only other example you can think of, unfortunate example as it is?
#52 to #41 - gisuar (11/08/2013) [-]
the fact that you favor the idea of trying to keep them away from the rest of society makes it look like you think they are not worth being a part of it

even though they are handicapped retarded or just damn potatoes doesn't really justify the idea of separating them from the rest of society
User avatar #53 to #52 - houseofbrick (11/08/2013) [-]
I just don't think society has to wear a hair shirt to feel better about itself.
#61 to #53 - gisuar (11/08/2013) [-]
it's not about feeling better that's the point of society otherwise we could remain being egoistic
#69 to #61 - houseofbrick (11/08/2013) [-]
I'm not advocating ******* concentration camps, just vocational schools. Now get off your high horse and stop getting upset when people view the severely handicapped as a burden on society. I'm not even talking about those with learning disabilities or mild-to-moderate autism, but the ones who will never function in society because they mentally can not be a part of society.
User avatar #38 to #21 - aznzeus ONLINE (11/08/2013) [-]
well the thought is that if we sent them to special schools they wouldnt be exposed to regular people and not know how to function in society which is mostly regular people. But if japan is able to make it work why the **** not?
User avatar #149 to #38 - ThatsSoFunnyHeHe ONLINE (11/08/2013) [-]
Even in regular schools they are very rarely exposed to other people.
The only time they'll even be around 'regular people' is while walking through halls (And they'll be guided by others), and probably during lunch (Where they'll likely have a special section that they must stay in)
#26 to #21 - anon (11/08/2013) [-]
because these Tard stories are ******** . I was attacked by a 'special student' once, even if theyre big, they dont act like animals, the fight like any other idiot would, grabbing and hitting.
#30 to #21 - squamousness **User deleted account** (11/08/2013) [-]
I like this idea. This is a good idea.
User avatar #45 - roflstorm ONLINE (11/08/2013) [-]
I have my own tard tale to tell.
It is the story......of Dallas.

> Be in 10th grade
> Be in office for some ******** .
> Waiting to be called upon when a pudgy kid flumps down next to me.
> Starts staring at me and drooling on his 3 sizes too small power rangers t-shirt.
> I put headphones in and tune out surrounding ******** .
> He grabs my headphones and throws them on the floor and goes back to eyeing me like a Hyena over a dying antelope.
> "Can i help you?"
> Continues judging my soul with this stare
> ..........................
> "MI NEM ITH DALLITH"
User avatar #48 to #45 - roflstorm ONLINE (11/08/2013) [-]
> "Hi Dallas......"
> Look around, growing uncomfortable
> "WHA MUZIG U LISN TO"
> Try to act cool
> "Rock"
> Uneasy silence. Which is odd because the office is normally a seething cauldron of noise and sounds.
> You can almost hear the gears in his head grinding against each other.
> Dallas slowly moves closer to me.
> Starts shaking and twitching
User avatar #54 to #48 - roflstorm ONLINE (11/08/2013) [-]
> I think i may have broken this creatures fragile grip on reality
> He moves close enough to ******* smell the all bran Tardobits he had for breakfast
> Looks me dead in the eye and let's out a bloodcurtling wail that could crack the concrete beneath us.
> I get up and try to flee
> Nope.jpg
> ******* go-go-gadget extendo-arm grabs me and pulls me back and pulls me back into my chair hard enough to crack the glass behind my head.
> The teachers in the office try to calm the raging beast but was nigh
> There was no brakes on the rage train. Only gas.
> He continues his bellowing screech and his grip tightens around my arm
User avatar #66 to #54 - roflstorm ONLINE (11/08/2013) [-]
******* page decided to move on while i was typing.

> I try time and time again to flee the kung fu grip of Dallas. But it was all for not as he pulls me back in my chair.
> Teachers start swarming Dallas as they try to release his grip from my arm.
> Dallas continues his death shuttering wail and starts to move up and down in his seat.
> The principle barrels down the starts to see what the commotion is all about.
> He witnesses my agony and the rapidly increasing tantrum of Dallas and calls in the Tard squad.
> The entire time Dallas is wailing and screaming loud enough to shake the ******* windows and the teachers are still trying to pry his meaty finger loafs from my arm.
> People from the outside do nothing but watch as the mad fatter goes into overdrive
> Some even take videos.
> One girl in particular takes a flash photgraph
> Ohdeargodwhathaveyoudone.png
User avatar #68 to #66 - roflstorm ONLINE (11/08/2013) [-]
> He stops DEAD.
> His insufferable wailing ceases and he stops bouncing in his seat. Still firmly latched to my arm
> He has acquired a new target.
> Faster than you can say "Madre de Dios", Dallas relinquishes his grip on my arm and bolts out the door.
> Everyone runs for dear life.
> Dallas tries to make the tight corner but slides into some boxes full of book orders and paper.
> This does nothing but further enrage the beast.
> He tears into every box and dumps everything out.
> Dear sweet Neptune, the tard squad has arrived.
> They run in and try to subdue the angry Dallas
User avatar #71 to #68 - roflstorm ONLINE (11/08/2013) [-]
> The tard squard try to rope the beast but Dallas counters with the boxes that are still full of paper.
> 2 20 lb boxes soar through the air and one squad member is hit.
> Dude actually got his rib cracked
> The force of the screaming and wailing mustve been too much for Dallas' intestines for they have emptied their contents into Dallas' scooby doo pants.
> Dallas is still sitting in a pile of feces, book orders and printing paper.
> Dallas starts crying as he continues to throw empty boxes at tard squad alpha.
> My arm is still ******* numb.
> 2 more trucks, Tard squads "Bravo" and "Charlie" pull up and wait outside for further instructions.
> Teachers from surrounding classrooms peek out and see if they can see the destruction.
User avatar #77 to #71 - roflstorm ONLINE (11/08/2013) [-]
Still story is still ******* going, by the way.

> Dallas' crying slowing grows in volume as another member of Tard squad Alpha tries to drag the behemoth out of his box fortress.
> Ihavemadeagravemistake.jpg
> Dallas clamps down on the squad members arm and from personal experience, will not let go.
> Dallas appears to know how to deal with these guys and proceeds to ******* BREAK the members arm. Like, ******* crack it.
> A seasoned tard veteran.
> 2 members of tard squad Alpha are down for the count.
> Dallas' wailing continues to grow as the smell of **** , tard tears and the fruity tard bits he ate from breakfast envelope the office.
User avatar #80 to #77 - roflstorm ONLINE (11/08/2013) [-]
Almost done.

> With 2 members of tard squad Alpha down, they call in Tard squad "Bravo" and "Charlie" in to take him out.
> Meanwhile, i'm still in my seat clutching my ruined arm in awe at what i am witnessing
> 8 guys in uniform run in and quickly pin the sobbing beast to the concrete floor.
> Eventually they get Dallas out of there and they check up on me to see if my arm is ok.
> The tard squads drag Dallas out and he takes the next 3 weeks off from school.
> Most people recognize me as "The man that survived Dallas".

The end
User avatar #81 to #80 - roflstorm ONLINE (11/08/2013) [-]
Epilogue:

Remember when i put my headphones in at the start?
And he asked what i was listening to?
I was about to listen to "Eye of the Tiger" by Survivor.
And the entire time all this was going on, you could faintly hear "Eye of the tiger"
And it was ******* awesome.
#96 to #80 - hellboundstrength (11/08/2013) [-]
hearing these tards having violent tantrums makes me think of the perfect way to rid of these tards helping the population crisis in a entertaining way...UFC for tards
hearing these tards having violent tantrums makes me think of the perfect way to rid of these tards helping the population crisis in a entertaining way...UFC for tards
#137 to #80 - harleycurnow (11/08/2013) [-]
I'm cringing at the thought of your headphones getting ripped to shreds after dangling in all the commotion.
#83 to #77 - iamwillygean (11/08/2013) [-]
**iamwillygean rolled a random image posted in comment #53 at My brain......hurts ** is that it holy **** !
#141 to #83 - iamderzerstorer (11/08/2013) [-]
My mind is full of **** right now.
User avatar #70 to #66 - idkbruh (11/08/2013) [-]
I lost it at "tard squad"
User avatar #78 to #54 - jimjoejohnson (11/08/2013) [-]
Lost it at go-go-gadget extendo-arm
#72 - puremadmentalged (11/08/2013) [-]
Long, but a good read
User avatar #107 to #72 - vgmddg (11/08/2013) [-]
That was an amazing tale. Seriously.
#115 to #72 - mummyslittlebitch (11/08/2013) [-]
ahahaha "please go, you're disrupting my classroom". That is exactly how I would react to that situation.
User avatar #162 to #72 - carbohydrates (11/09/2013) [-]
A thumb for you good sir, may Fats Mcgee stay far away.
User avatar #181 to #72 - craaabs (11/09/2013) [-]
Definitely up there with the NealTard story.
#189 to #72 - xelaalex ONLINE (11/09/2013) [-]
That might just be one of the best 4chan posts I've read
#105 to #72 - toncheky (11/08/2013) [-]
That was just... wow.
User avatar #86 to #72 - roflstorm ONLINE (11/08/2013) [-]
Fats Mcgee and the retard three

Forever a legendary tale.
#67 - titilanious (11/08/2013) [-]
Small tard story of my own.
> be in a small school only a few kids in the class
>one of them is tard not full tard but still tardy none-the-less
> im not a small kid was actually the biggest in my class at this point
> some asshole steals tard's day planner and is playing keep away
> asshole throws it to me
> i go to give it back to tard and he bites me on the arm
> wind up and punch the tard free of my arm and throw his planner at him
>tard walks away holding his face and planner then proceeds to tell the teacher this
> " the tall one threw the radiator at me"
> MFW....
User avatar #5 - doctorgolgo (11/08/2013) [-]
I'm curious, OP. What did the tard write on the floor?
User avatar #14 to #5 - willshire (11/08/2013) [-]
I'm sure it's a typo of writhing.
User avatar #98 - solidderking (11/08/2013) [-]
looks like admin tried to bite someone again
#108 to #98 - mummyslittlebitch (11/08/2013) [-]
SSSHHHHHHH! He's watching
#49 - FatherPedobear (11/08/2013) [-]
Be a Sophomore.   
Want to be a good person, join a best buddies (Be friends with a tard) thing at school.   
Get the least retarded but still something not quite right one.   
We shall call him "I PUT MAH PANTS ON" or Ipmpo.   
All he does when we hang out is beg to play Zombies.   
Sometimes decide to dominate him in Halo 4  May be bad, but I rocked at that 			****		.    
He always begged to take home whatever we had to drink..   
Got a "Wat Up" text everyday begging to hang out.   
Finally fed up.   
Text him " I just don't have anymore time for our friendship, I'm sorry."   
"Ok."   
Mfw I broke up with a retard.   
I have another good Ipmpo story if anyone cares.
Be a Sophomore.
Want to be a good person, join a best buddies (Be friends with a tard) thing at school.
Get the least retarded but still something not quite right one.
We shall call him "I PUT MAH PANTS ON" or Ipmpo.
All he does when we hang out is beg to play Zombies.
Sometimes decide to dominate him in Halo 4 May be bad, but I rocked at that **** .
He always begged to take home whatever we had to drink..
Got a "Wat Up" text everyday begging to hang out.
Finally fed up.
Text him " I just don't have anymore time for our friendship, I'm sorry."
"Ok."
Mfw I broke up with a retard.
I have another good Ipmpo story if anyone cares.
User avatar #51 to #49 - ishallsmiteyou (11/08/2013) [-]
I care.
#60 to #51 - FatherPedobear (11/08/2013) [-]
Okey dokey.   
Before he started texting me non-stop, Ipmpo went with me, my brother, and a friend to a party. Mostly outside.   
Big mistake.   
Kids started smoking weed in corner.   
"Chase,  yes that's my name deal with it are they doing drugs?   
Yes Ipmpo, it's for medication.   
He buys it.    
Someone tries to give him a drink.   
"My mom will kill me if she finds out I drank a beer."   
It ain't beer bud.   
He drinks from his solo cup a wonderous concoction of hawaiian punch and something too 			*******		 strong for a tard.   
Ipmpo gets very buzzed.   
Ipmpo finds a razor scooter.   
Decides to go for a spin.   
Faceplants in front of every 			*******		 person in tthe party.   
I have to fix his glasses for him.   
Ohgodwhy.jpg.   
It was a bad party.   
I brought a tard to a high-school party.   
The impact in the gif is accurate of how hard he hit the asphalt. Tard could not possibly get airtime though.
Okey dokey.
Before he started texting me non-stop, Ipmpo went with me, my brother, and a friend to a party. Mostly outside.
Big mistake.
Kids started smoking weed in corner.
"Chase, yes that's my name deal with it are they doing drugs?
Yes Ipmpo, it's for medication.
He buys it.
Someone tries to give him a drink.
"My mom will kill me if she finds out I drank a beer."
It ain't beer bud.
He drinks from his solo cup a wonderous concoction of hawaiian punch and something too ******* strong for a tard.
Ipmpo gets very buzzed.
Ipmpo finds a razor scooter.
Decides to go for a spin.
Faceplants in front of every ******* person in tthe party.
I have to fix his glasses for him.
Ohgodwhy.jpg.
It was a bad party.
I brought a tard to a high-school party.
The impact in the gif is accurate of how hard he hit the asphalt. Tard could not possibly get airtime though.
#64 to #62 - FatherPedobear (11/08/2013) [-]
Ipmpo still tries to message my mother on Facebook to see if I can hang out. And my friends. He is now collectively ignored because he is a mildly-tarded and round mooch who dominates my xbox.
#140 - patriotpenguin ONLINE (11/08/2013) [-]
''hallway looks like the somme''
#173 to #140 - toastedspikes (11/09/2013) [-]
>enlarge
>stare into eyes
>never sleep again
#171 to #140 - lavitts (11/09/2013) [-]
Right down to the thousand yard stares of the horrified onlookers.
User avatar #175 to #171 - toastedspikes (11/09/2013) [-]
That's ww2 but jesus christ that's an amazing painting.
User avatar #177 to #175 - lavitts (11/09/2013) [-]
Sorry, it was the first thing on Google.
#196 to #177 - stgfilitov (11/09/2013) [-]
Well you are correct in some ways. The paintings name is "The thousand yard stare" and yes it's WWII in the painting
User avatar #197 to #196 - lavitts (11/09/2013) [-]
I was just talking about the WWII thing.
User avatar #198 to #197 - stgfilitov (11/09/2013) [-]
I know.
#167 - Byte (11/09/2013) [-]
So I'm just sitting in class, taking an exam with fellow students.
It's about noon, around the time the special kids are let inside from their special recces.
They're special so they get three while we get one. lol'k.
Anyway, they're usually pretty quite aside from one that needs to wear a diaper that always yells "OMNOMOMNOMNOM" or some **** , and another gently bumping his head against things.
Today, that kid was wearing a helmet and had been more vigorous with the bumping.
Teacher tells him to stop
Special kid lets out a primal yell and sprints down the hall way, then BAM! Triceratops the lockers next to my classroom. Wall shakes. We go look out in the hall to see he BROKE his helmet, and had bent the top locker door inward.

MFW Super Tard-ceritops.
#74 - wizardbaker (11/08/2013) [-]
>Cousin has full on retardation
>Speaks in grunts and moans, with the random word or phrase thrown in
>He's overall a pretty hilarious guy though, fun to hang around with.
>One day, and I'm pretty young at this point, I'm at my aunt's house
>Walking down the stairs, minding my own business
>Suddenly, out of nowhere, like he just teleported there, my cousin is standing next to me
>"Oh, hey [INSERT COUSIN'S NAME HERE]"
>He just looks at me, silent
>He suddenly grabs my hand with the force of a thousand suns
>Pulls it towards his mouth
>I need to use all my strength to pull back
>He's trying to eat my ******* hand
>Rip it out of his grasp
>He walks off like it was nothing

Still a pretty cool guy though. Didn't ******* watch the kids movie I bought for him though.
#145 - arollinggolem (11/08/2013) [-]
>Be me   
>Freshman betafag in new town   
>Tard's trigger: "I got your nose"   
>In hallway walking past library which is across from TardWarts   
>Babysitters teaching 1st grade 			****		 to tards   
>Do they send them here to not scare children?   
>Friend walking with says it's not that bad watch   
>Yells trigger word   
>thiscantbegood.jpg   
>Tard eyes turn red and finds closest victim   
>Turns out its a kid adept in MMA   
>Tard begins to unleash hell on little rich mexican   
>Deals with it for a moment obviously getting pissed   
>hereitcomes.jpg   
>Kid goes Bruce Lee unleashing the fury of ten-thousand suns on tard   
>Tard doesn't stop becasue he is a tard   
>MMA jumps up and FLYING ROUNDHOUSE KICKS TARD IN HIS BLOODIED FACE   
>Tard collapses unconcious and MMA walks away like nothing happened   
>mfw me and best friend watching tard get the hell beat out of him   
>mfw nobody knows who shouted trigger word
>Be me
>Freshman betafag in new town
>Tard's trigger: "I got your nose"
>In hallway walking past library which is across from TardWarts
>Babysitters teaching 1st grade **** to tards
>Do they send them here to not scare children?
>Friend walking with says it's not that bad watch
>Yells trigger word
>thiscantbegood.jpg
>Tard eyes turn red and finds closest victim
>Turns out its a kid adept in MMA
>Tard begins to unleash hell on little rich mexican
>Deals with it for a moment obviously getting pissed
>hereitcomes.jpg
>Kid goes Bruce Lee unleashing the fury of ten-thousand suns on tard
>Tard doesn't stop becasue he is a tard
>MMA jumps up and FLYING ROUNDHOUSE KICKS TARD IN HIS BLOODIED FACE
>Tard collapses unconcious and MMA walks away like nothing happened
>mfw me and best friend watching tard get the hell beat out of him
>mfw nobody knows who shouted trigger word


#28 - adu (11/08/2013) [-]
I have nothing against the mentally disabled, but I believe in treating a person like they act. If an irredeemable retarded person flies off the handle to that extent, then I don't even think they're worth tax dollars. If you're going to attack someone like a rabid dog, then you should be put down like one.
#57 to #28 - thegreatanime (11/08/2013) [-]
Just a random question, but where is the pic from? Like who is that?
#63 to #57 - adu (11/08/2013) [-]
The character is Sanji from One Piece, and the picture is from DeviantArt.
#155 to #63 - anon (11/08/2013) [-]
It always throws me off when you can read things both ways and it still makes perfect sense.
User avatar #65 to #57 - adu (11/08/2013) [-]
That last spoilertag was horrifically inconvenient, so here's the link:
#160 to #28 - themole (11/09/2013) [-]
My profession is what would be considered a "wrangler". I've been punched, kicked, and bitten to the point of blood being drawn myself, and at no point have I ever wished or thought death upon the kids. They are some of the kindest and sweetest children you'll ever know. Saying they need "put down" is disgusting. I can't imagine how you would feel if your child was born with autism or any other form of a mental handicap and people thought that he/she should be put down because they act on impulses.
#163 to #160 - adu (11/09/2013) [-]
Autism doesn't make kids want to tear chunks out of each other. Someone who would inflict that kind of pain on a stranger for a sandwich is not someone I would describe as "kind" or "sweet" in any sense. If they behave violently, then at least put them where they can't hurt anyone. The fact that this one was even known for having violent outbursts shows extremely poor judgement on both the parents and the school board.

If I had a violently retarded kid, I would at least keep him away from others so that he wouldn't hurt anyone when he inevitably flies off the handle. I'm just sick of people pretending that they'll be productive members of society at one point, because they really won't, they're a burden and a danger to themselves and everyone around them.
#170 to #163 - themole (11/09/2013) [-]
Yes, yes it does actually. Autists get set in a frame of mind where they can't think of anything but one particular thing. In this case, it was leaving the "de-escalation room" at the school I work at. This particular room is that "safe haven", or the place away from others. The same night it happened (parent-teacher conferences), the child came into the gym and him and I re-enacted scenes from DBZ, one of his favorite shows.

You're only seeing how the act happened, not why it happened.

Honestly, I think that until you work with children like that first-hand and understand their behaviors more than being "violently retarded", you shouldn't have such a strong opinion about it to think that death should come first.

There is no way that I can make you see kids like that like I do, so I can't see this discussion going anywhere good. At that, I will wish you a good night.
User avatar #32 to #28 - localbees (11/08/2013) [-]
I tend to agree
#152 to #125 - cockonopolis (11/08/2013) [-]
Worth the read.
User avatar #158 to #125 - richardastley ONLINE (11/09/2013) [-]
In case anyone's wondering, this is worth the read!
0
#161 to #158 - mangostormlegend has deleted their comment [-]
User avatar #159 to #158 - richardastley ONLINE (11/09/2013) [-]
lol And someone else already said it.
#174 to #125 - mangostormlegend ONLINE (11/09/2013) [-]
And now, the second act
#178 to #125 - ChrisCmagicbananas ONLINE (11/09/2013) [-]
That was ******* great ................................................................................ ...........................................................................Yep still laughing
User avatar #182 to #125 - bigsaltyballs (11/09/2013) [-]
that thread... that thready thread... that theard that reeks of


TARDMCGEE AND HIS RETARD THREE
User avatar #204 to #125 - darkangeloffire (11/09/2013) [-]
I agree with the consensus, it's worth the read. The Tale of FatsMcgee and his Retard Three.
User avatar #226 to #125 - fatsmcgee (11/09/2013) [-]
Always happy to meet the fans.
#113 - onlytofap (11/08/2013) [-]
I work with retarded people (we prefer to call the developmentally disabled) and some times it is just so ******* infuriating.

Just this morning, i had to wake a downy up and get him ready for work. Everything is going good, but this fat ass downy loses his **** over food. He didn't get what he wanted and so he started trashing his room, even throwing a lamp at me. I calmly try to redirect him, but he says, "I'll rip your ******* head off." and punches me in the back of the neck. This **** is ridiculous but i put up with it to help those who need it.

tl;dr
retards ****** cray cray
#130 to #113 - phoenixactual (11/08/2013) [-]
If that's true, you are an amazing human being for doing this on a daily basis
#139 to #130 - onlytofap (11/08/2013) [-]
well thank you, and it's very true. If I wanted to make a fake story for thumbs i would have added in the "super human retard strength" which is utter bull **** .
#148 to #139 - phoenixactual (11/08/2013) [-]
No problem. I work at a soup kitchen wednesdays, I know how good it feels to do something just to help
User avatar #116 to #113 - ithyphallophobia **User deleted account** (11/08/2013) [-]
My mom used to work with them at a school and she quit because she just got tired of being bitten and spit on and having her hair pulled. I don't blame her it sounded kind of miserable lol
#118 to #116 - onlytofap (11/08/2013) [-]
I totally get where she's coming from. People try to do this job because it pays decent and they want to help them live normal lives, atleast that's why I started this job, but some times I just want to quit. I feel like kicking some retard ass. Some of them can't help what they do, but for the most part, downies are just like normal people and it pisses me off that they get away with this **** .
User avatar #150 to #118 - inanimateobject (11/08/2013) [-]
Man, my Aunt does that same work, but she provides care to what is basically a fully on ******* mega-tard with a serious case of the grumpies.

This tard with pull my aunt's hair, punch her, spit on her, bite her, and chuck her used napkins/tissues at her. That's on a good day... I've got a lot of stories, but I don't feel like typing unless there's interest. But I totally get what you mean, the tards are ******* terrible. The tard I mention above has her own house, she pays no bills, is provided 24/7 care, all paid for by the government. It literally lives and eats for free. It even has a boyfriend, but that's another story.
User avatar #120 to #118 - ithyphallophobia **User deleted account** (11/08/2013) [-]
Yeah I hear ya. She did it for the cause and money too, she worked there right after I was born and she couldn't handle it for very long so now she's an occupational therapist instead...swapped out working with the mentally handicapped to working with mostly old folks haha
#121 to #116 - jazzytheferret (11/08/2013) [-]
They should just be locked up in a staged environment. We'll set up a town for them with things necessary for survival (food, clothes, shelter, etc.). their day to day lives and outbursts will be televised on t.v. and the profits will go to funding schools where people who will contribute to society are taught. let's make them useful instead of them just being a drain on resources and other peoples lives.
User avatar #131 to #121 - zafara (11/08/2013) [-]
I think they do that somewhere. I forget where, but it might have been mentioned in one of those tard stories comps about a year back.

Or I could be thinking of Honey Boo Boo, or that other reality show with the fat redneck who loves potatoes (not Sasha, she's not a redneck or fat).
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