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[ 272 comments ]
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164 comments displayed.
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+456
#4 - anon (09/28/2015) [-]
Weak insults.

These roasters couldn't reheat a microwave hotdog.
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0
#247 to #4 - anon (09/29/2015) [-]
Eh, to each their own. I actually find the Marilyn Monroe one to be pretty funny.
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+1
User avatar #216 to #4 - lapsushominum ONLINE (09/29/2015) [-]
Glad I'm not the only one who thought so, most of these were really generic and uninspired.
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+19
#148 to #4 - capnkrunch (09/29/2015) [-]
This was the greatest roast on this post
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+42
#18 to #4 - anon (09/28/2015) [-]
I thought the office toner one was pretty hilarious
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+43
User avatar #137 to #4 - Javapenguin (09/29/2015) [-]
Party on, Garth made me ******* cry
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+53
#38 to #4 - thecrayzeeman (09/28/2015) [-]
The clock hand one was savage tho.
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+201
#1 - chokinandtokin ONLINE (09/28/2015) [-]
"Party on, Garth"
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+15
#119 to #24 - anon (09/29/2015) [-]
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+13
#22 - charak (09/28/2015) [-]
Roast Me!!
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+1
User avatar #193 to #22 - bme (09/29/2015) [-]
I can actually hear you playing free bird in this picture.
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+13
#61 to #22 - redrangerpower (09/29/2015) [-]
Saw you in the Dollar Tree freezer isle.
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0
#111 to #22 - christhulu (09/29/2015) [-]
You look like you freebase cheetos, and probably play like you're high off of them too.
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-3
User avatar #136 to #22 - ppheadbuttface (09/29/2015) [-]
You look like Chum Lee's redneck cousin.
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-1
#199 to #22 - anon (09/29/2015) [-]
You wanna clean off the BBQ sauce from your face there bud?
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0
User avatar #221 to #22 - stardustdragonlord (09/29/2015) [-]
No billy bob, no! Don't eat the guitar! Thats all your daddy left you when he finally kicked the bucket, tripped on it, and cracked his skull on your crib all of 10 years ago.
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0
User avatar #231 to #22 - HURLEYSURFERDUDE ONLINE (09/29/2015) [-]
Instead of getting the Pick of Destiny, you shouldve sold your soul for a ******* gym membership.

You're a cool guy and I love you.
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+6
#72 to #22 - anon (09/29/2015) [-]
the only thing cheaper than that ****** ass stock guitar is a the 5 dollar blowjobs you get off your sister
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+6
User avatar #73 to #72 - charak (09/29/2015) [-]
It's actually modded quite extensively
Zack wylde active EMGs, modded pickup selector to act as killswitch
Bullhorn knobs
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0
#75 to #73 - anon (09/29/2015) [-]
cant polish a turd mate
cheap wood/ cheap build is still cheap ****
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+2
User avatar #76 to #75 - charak (09/29/2015) [-]
It's the best model ibanez has that doesn't go into their prestige models.
Getting a baritone guitar next month to try and make it look like a normal guitar on me.
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+6
User avatar #99 to #22 - rickysbweiner (09/29/2015) [-]
I bet you refrigerate syrup and put the milk in before the cereal.
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0
User avatar #162 to #99 - kumiuchi (09/29/2015) [-]
What's wrong with refrigerating syrup? Have I been doing it wrong this whole time?
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0
User avatar #266 to #162 - rickysbweiner (09/29/2015) [-]
why would you put something cold on a meal that's meant to be hot? It also makes if flow slower.
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0
User avatar #272 to #266 - kumiuchi (09/30/2015) [-]
I don't know. I also refrigerate ketchup and then put it on a hot cheeseburger. I was told to do it in a dream. By God. At least, I think it was God.
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+14
#52 to #22 - foodyquest (09/28/2015) [-]
Due to your weight you don't seem to be the healthiest person in the world. Your fashion sense isn't very sensible also the football team you support is not the same as the football team I support there for you have poor judgment and taste.
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0
User avatar #55 to #52 - charak (09/28/2015) [-]
Had me untill football, I don't wtch any sports
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+4
User avatar #67 to #55 - lemonlord ONLINE (09/29/2015) [-]
Not surprising, you'd probably consider that exercise.
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0
User avatar #241 to #67 - hopetheworm (09/29/2015) [-]
OOOOOOOHHHHH SNAP SON
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-1
User avatar #58 to #55 - foodyquest (09/29/2015) [-]
That looked like a raiders hat
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+7
User avatar #78 to #22 - barterbrothers (09/29/2015) [-]
You're the human version of those yellow stains white t-shirts get in the armpits.
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+9
User avatar #31 to #22 - thematthew (09/28/2015) [-]
you're so fat your chin got hungry and ate your neck.
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+11
#33 to #31 - charak (09/28/2015) [-]
i've heard better
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+41
User avatar #37 to #33 - thematthew (09/28/2015) [-]
you're quoting people who hear you play aren't you?
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+4
User avatar #54 to #37 - highkey (09/28/2015) [-]
nice
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+1
User avatar #39 to #37 - charak (09/28/2015) [-]
Oooh, that's the closest thing to damage you've done since you got here obvious reference
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+12
User avatar #27 to #22 - emptysuperman ONLINE (09/28/2015) [-]
Unroastable. You are the perfect man.
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0
#164 to #22 - lvengeancel (09/29/2015) [-]
I bet you shred.....your sausage fingers on the guitar strings. But the you'd have a snack for after you get exhausted from 2 minutes of flailing around.
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0
User avatar #87 to #22 - raybanned (09/29/2015) [-]
I didn;t know the singer from blues traveller was still alive!
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+4
User avatar #187 to #22 - laspussy (09/29/2015) [-]
Well if we did then we might be able to solve world hunger for a day or two
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0
#230 to #22 - IamPinhead (09/29/2015) [-]
How's it feel knowing you're probably just talented enough as a musician to express your sorrows over your sister rejecting you, but not educated enough to describe how she's also your mother?
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+4
#124 to #22 - dillweed (09/29/2015) [-]
You look like your wife left you because you are a hopeless guitar player who only plays at harvest festivals and summer camps
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0
#209 to #22 - rakes (09/29/2015) [-]
You only have that goatee because if you didn't, it would look like you don't have a chin.
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+3
User avatar #139 to #22 - thejusticar (09/29/2015) [-]
aw sick when does autistic slayer come to Oregon?
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+1
#149 to #139 - charak (09/29/2015) [-]
roasted
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0
User avatar #178 to #149 - slycoop (09/29/2015) [-]
"Four, I mean five, I mean FIRE!"

I ******* love that show.
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-5
User avatar #147 to #22 - kyteflyer (09/29/2015) [-]
You look like a fedora atheist and a redneck had a child
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+3
#114 to #22 - damiar (09/29/2015) [-]
Hey man at least youve answered a question fat guys everywhere wonder "if i have one supermassive glob of flesh instead of a chin where does my goatee end?" Plus I'm sure you are quite well off in whatever white supremacist group you belong to. So kudos to you my friend and good luck with the whole blaming the Mexicans for you not having a job thing I'm sure it had nothing to do with your GED or that 3rd DUI.
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+1
User avatar #118 to #114 - charak (09/29/2015) [-]
Savage
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0
User avatar #112 to #22 - letting [OP] (09/29/2015) [-]
Fluffy is that you? When did you learn to play the guitar?
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+3
#81 to #22 - anon (09/29/2015) [-]
You look like a bald teddybear but with pubic hair.
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0
User avatar #98 to #22 - rebornpotato (09/29/2015) [-]
Is your bands name the rolling doughnuts?
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+4
User avatar #74 to #22 - resbiansrock (09/29/2015) [-]
With fingers like that, there's no way you can play that guitar, maybe one of your chins can help?
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+15
User avatar #104 to #22 - articulate (09/29/2015) [-]
You're pretty metal. Even your weight is heavy.
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+4
#106 to #104 - charak (09/29/2015) [-]
Best one so far!
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+90
#6 - thefirstporkchop (09/28/2015) [-]
Outside of some of these insults being kinda weak, some of these girls were hot as **** .
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0
#191 to #6 - anon (09/29/2015) [-]
I like the "Garth" girl
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0
User avatar #205 to #6 - twiceasfun (09/29/2015) [-]
Yeah, that is typically what happens when you roast something
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0
User avatar #271 to #6 - penileburglar (09/29/2015) [-]
It's easier to have the courage to let yourself get roasted when you already know that you're actually very attractive.
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+14
#43 - Awesomenessniss (09/28/2015) [-]
Roast me
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0
User avatar #180 to #43 - laspussy (09/29/2015) [-]
Put on some weight
you're practically all skin and bones
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+5
#117 to #43 - christhulu (09/29/2015) [-]
*tsssssssss* *flip* *tsssss* *move a little bit* *tssss* ...
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+25
#60 to #50 - garymuthafuknoak (09/29/2015) [-]
when you roast pork chops so hard it turns into steak
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+4
#93 to #60 - mahusername (09/29/2015) [-]
that was pork? **** !
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+1
User avatar #86 to #50 - rebornpotato (09/29/2015) [-]
That's savage dude, damn.
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0
User avatar #100 to #50 - Awesomenessniss (09/29/2015) [-]
Wha-, steak? WHAT THE **** DID YOU DO TO ME?
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+96
#2 - anon (09/28/2015) [-]
Over half of these "Roasts" where just half baked. Seriously, kindergarteners makes up better insults than that.
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+3
#44 - mrjweezy (09/28/2015) [-]
dont give me any weak sauce
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-4
#116 to #44 - christhulu (09/29/2015) [-]
You look like a ******* reject from the Backstreet Boys, and your face reminds me of some kind of cartoon chipmunk.
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-2
#120 to #44 - damiar (09/29/2015) [-]
You shouldn't leave the house with that pesky ankle bracelet on bro wouldn't want to go back to jail. It's gonna be ok though you'll be back on the streets looking for those sexy sexy children in no time. But seriously you look like the type of guy that takes a photo outside of his neighbors house so a bunch of people on the Internet don't know he still lives in his parents trailer.
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-1
#152 to #44 - anon (09/29/2015) [-]
Weak sauce is what your dad tells you to manually extract from his lower extremity.
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0
#196 to #44 - chupavisor (09/29/2015) [-]
You look like you're waiting for your cousin to come over so you can Netflix and Chill
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0
#238 to #44 - IamPinhead (09/29/2015) [-]
When your face ends up on the inmate roster for your county, nobody is going to say they 'never would have thought [it would be] streaking through a Stuckey's high on mescaline'.
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-3
#47 to #44 - superphil (09/28/2015) [-]
you're a man.
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+1
User avatar #169 to #47 - mrjweezy (09/29/2015) [-]
this is news to me.
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+1
User avatar #85 to #44 - rebornpotato (09/29/2015) [-]
You look like if Jordon Maron CaptainSparklez had a half retarded and forgotten brother.
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+1
User avatar #90 to #44 - raybanned (09/29/2015) [-]
so ugly your beard started to run away
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0
User avatar #173 to #90 - mrjweezy (09/29/2015) [-]
do not enter that sauce in the county fair.
If you do it will lose
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+1
User avatar #97 to #44 - rickysbweiner (09/29/2015) [-]
I bet you jerk off into condoms.
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+2
User avatar #107 to #44 - articulate (09/29/2015) [-]
If you were cast as a dwarf you wouldn't need a nose prosthetic.
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+4
#59 to #44 - donfailed (09/29/2015) [-]
Don't need to. It looks like you came from it.
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+5
User avatar #80 to #44 - barterbrothers (09/29/2015) [-]
You look like you make your reflection uncomfortable.
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+20
#48 to #44 - mrlawl ONLINE (09/28/2015) [-]
I bet you film vertically.
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+11
#5 - anon (09/28/2015) [-]
The one with the clock hands was cold as **** .
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+5
#17 - jjvoodoo (09/28/2015) [-]
roast me faggots
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0
User avatar #115 to #17 - articulate (09/29/2015) [-]
Politicians line their pockets while people like you live their whole life with undiagnosed autism.
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0
#133 to #17 - damiar (09/29/2015) [-]
I'm confused as to why a FJ regular would actually have a neckbeard. I mean 70% of the front page has at least one insult to neckbeards in the comments. It even looks like youve shaved part of your face bro. Do you seriously go out of your way to look like you have nothing going on in your life? Do you actually try to look like bitch at your mother for over cooking the meatloaf?
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0
User avatar #179 to #133 - jjvoodoo (09/29/2015) [-]
well i do have more hair on my face but you cant really see it in this pick (still mostly neck beard though)
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0
#153 to #17 - anon (09/29/2015) [-]
That moment when you just sharted...
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0
#197 to #17 - chupavisor (09/29/2015) [-]
You look like you were startled by this pic even though you too it yourself
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+1
User avatar #69 to #17 - pedestrianx (09/29/2015) [-]
Haven't your genes already done enough?
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+1
User avatar #92 to #17 - rebornpotato (09/29/2015) [-]
You look like you'd yell at your mom that your clutching on a video game. That's a reference.
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+1
User avatar #105 to #17 - letting [OP] (09/29/2015) [-]
You look like you shaved your pubes off and glued them to your neck.
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+4
User avatar #25 to #17 - InfiniteFetus (09/28/2015) [-]
You're so ugly that your retreating hairline has pulled your eyes wide open.
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+5
User avatar #28 to #17 - thematthew (09/28/2015) [-]
a while ago i saw a **** cringe comp, one of the images was of a guy who got a sex change, he still looked like a dude but with a nasty ass vag, you look like that guy.
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+2
User avatar #29 to #28 - jjvoodoo (09/28/2015) [-]
maybe i am that guy
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+3
User avatar #30 to #29 - thematthew (09/28/2015) [-]
wouldn't surprise me.
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+7
#57 to #17 - donfailed (09/29/2015) [-]
Neckbeard so strong the rest of the beard left in embarrassment.
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+8
User avatar #41 to #17 - charak (09/28/2015) [-]
Your surprised look makes me believe that you're finally looking in a mirror for the first time.
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+10
User avatar #19 to #17 - ziirak (09/28/2015) [-]
Your mustache looks like its being sucked into the caverns you call nostrils
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+6
#14 - joshualegitsky (09/28/2015) [-]
ROAST ME
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+1
#239 to #14 - IamPinhead (09/29/2015) [-]
Did you have a stroke shouting that in your head or is the left half of your face just as lazy as your cleaning?
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0
User avatar #268 to #239 - joshualegitsky (09/29/2015) [-]
Looking at the picture now, I really do have a lazy eye and I never really knew that
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+2
User avatar #34 to #14 - thematthew (09/28/2015) [-]
i don't want my BBQ to get acny.
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+2
User avatar #66 to #14 - jamesisawesome (09/29/2015) [-]
You look like someone tried to abort Draco Malfoy.
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0
User avatar #184 to #66 - laspussy (09/29/2015) [-]
or the cloning process went horribly wrong
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+2
User avatar #91 to #14 - raybanned (09/29/2015) [-]
nice to see your face is as messy as your room
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+2
User avatar #96 to #14 - rickysbweiner (09/29/2015) [-]
You look like the kind of guy that, after his friends fall asleep, he sniffs their dick.
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+6
#20 to #14 - ziirak (09/28/2015) [-]
You're only worth using comic sans
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0
User avatar #62 to #20 - joshualegitsky (09/29/2015) [-]
Those are my roommates btw
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0
User avatar #68 to #62 - ziirak (09/29/2015) [-]
The real roast was with the comic sans. Just needed a reason to use it.
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User avatar #158 to #68 - joshualegitsky (09/29/2015) [-]
Oh okay ha
0
#198 to #14 - chupavisor has deleted their comment [-]
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0
User avatar #270 to #198 - joshualegitsky (09/29/2015) [-]
I was looking for the "you look like the type of guy" more than the pizza faces
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+3
User avatar #26 to #14 - xenblood ONLINE (09/28/2015) [-]
You're a bigger mess than your room.
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+3
User avatar #40 to #14 - charak (09/28/2015) [-]
The only thing dirtier than your room is your face.
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+3
User avatar #83 to #14 - rebornpotato (09/29/2015) [-]
You look like you are the "I would've gone professional in baseball if i didn't hurt my shoulder" type of guy.
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+1
User avatar #159 to #83 - joshualegitsky (09/29/2015) [-]
That's actually so true haha
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+3
User avatar #109 to #14 - letting [OP] (09/29/2015) [-]
It cost your parents half-a-year's salary to pay for the retouch on your school photos.
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+6
#15 to #14 - anon (09/28/2015) [-]
Make your bed, young man
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+5
User avatar #16 to #14 - lulzinmyroflcopter (09/28/2015) [-]
If you brush your teeth and buy proactive, you could be a 6
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+1
User avatar #154 to #14 - bdevils (09/29/2015) [-]
Jesus Chist, clean your ******* room
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+1
User avatar #42 to #14 - eezo (09/28/2015) [-]
Take out the ******* trash
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+2
User avatar #141 to #14 - thejusticar (09/29/2015) [-]
you kinda look like that guy that drinks beer at the back of a party and scopes fat women with both of your wandering eyes
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0
User avatar #195 to #14 - bme (09/29/2015) [-]
You look like that guy who plays on all the sports teams in high school and tries to touch people's dicks in the locker room and then says kidding no homo.
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+2
#123 to #14 - damiar (09/29/2015) [-]
I imagine if Jesse from breaking bad was actually on meth he might look something like you.
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+8
User avatar #21 to #14 - InfiniteFetus (09/28/2015) [-]
Is that a weak-ass smile or another one of your pores filled to the brim?
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+5
#36 - whatwhen (09/28/2015) [-]
**whatwhen used "*roll picture*"**
**whatwhen rolled image** most of these are decent looking woomans
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+4
#10 - gomugomuno ONLINE (09/28/2015) [-]
what is happening with the arms? is that the chair

she is holding that piece of paper with her right hand where is the left?
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0
User avatar #11 to #10 - gomugomuno ONLINE (09/28/2015) [-]
dont worry i see, there is no chair it's a selfie at a weird angle.
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0
#177 to #10 - lvengeancel (09/29/2015) [-]
No, her arms are that fat. That's why her boobs are so saggy.
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+3
#101 - anon (09/29/2015) [-]
Nine out of ten of these are **** .
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+3
User avatar #13 - wltwitch (09/28/2015) [-]
These insults are so weak, they could be Anita sarkeesian at a debate.
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+1
#217 - twiceasfun (09/29/2015) [-]
Roast me, fj
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0
User avatar #242 to #217 - baconhero (09/29/2015) [-]
Not really a roast, but you'd be a pretty decent trap. Unless you already are one.
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+1
#243 to #242 - twiceasfun (09/29/2015) [-]
>Sees decent(?) looking girl
>"You'd make a good trap"
Smooth as asphalt, dear. This is why you guys can't get laid Maybe I am
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0
#244 to #243 - baconhero (09/29/2015) [-]
If you are, then good on you, sir. You're prettier than some women I know.
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0
#255 to #244 - twiceasfun (09/29/2015) [-]
"Sir" How dare you, ********
..In all seriousness though, thanks I suppose. Can't say "prettier than some other women" is quite the highest praise I've ever received, but I'll accept the compliment
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0
User avatar #228 to #217 - letting [OP] (09/29/2015) [-]
You look like you are a dude.
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+1
User avatar #229 to #228 - twiceasfun (09/29/2015) [-]
Someone already beat you to the punch dear
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+2
User avatar #233 to #229 - letting [OP] (09/29/2015) [-]
No, you don't understand. He said you looked like you USED to be a dude.

I said that you look like a dude.

No transformation has taken place, clearly.
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+1
#235 to #233 - twiceasfun (09/29/2015) [-]
#triggered
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0
User avatar #237 to #235 - letting [OP] (09/29/2015) [-]
#offensive
#NoTriggerWarning
#sexist
#racist
#misogyny
#cis scum
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0
User avatar #240 to #237 - twiceasfun (09/29/2015) [-]
Whoa there, buddy. Racist? Are you implying it's possible to be racist toward me? A white person? But muh made up definition of racism disagrees
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0
User avatar #245 to #240 - letting [OP] (09/29/2015) [-]
With you being white, you're automatically privileged. It does not matter if you are male or female, questionable creature, as you were automatically born to serve the male dominated patriarchy. Your only hope of redemption is to deny your white heritage and begin identifying as a genderfluid albino otterkin.
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0
User avatar #246 to #245 - twiceasfun (09/29/2015) [-]
Well, obviously I'm already otterkin. I identify so strongly with otters that I used a reaction gif of an otter once
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User avatar #249 to #246 - letting [OP] (09/29/2015) [-]
Fantastic news, your transformation is complete, and you may migrate to the promised land of Tumblr, where the landwhales roam free and the cis-gendered men's torturous cries can be heard like gentle music in the breeze.
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0
User avatar #251 to #249 - twiceasfun (09/29/2015) [-]
I have waited all my life for this moment
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0
User avatar #254 to #251 - letting [OP] (09/29/2015) [-]
Go, my child, and have a wondrous life beyond these forsaken walls of FJ. Do as you see fit, love, laugh, cry, and feel. Bond with the otterkin, as they are your family now, but do not fear venturing beyond such a limit. There are many -kins yet to discover, and because logic and reason are absent in that land, you can identify as as many things as you so wish.
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+1
User avatar #256 to #254 - twiceasfun (09/29/2015) [-]
Shut up, ******** . You're interrupting my transendence
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+1
#257 to #256 - letting [OP] (09/29/2015) [-]
You are ready.
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+1
User avatar #222 to #217 - bme (09/29/2015) [-]
You look like you used to be a dude.
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+2
User avatar #227 to #222 - twiceasfun (09/29/2015) [-]
So I've been told
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+2
#138 - internetnick (09/29/2015) [-]
All of the insults that have nothing to do with their picture are stupid.
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+2
#132 - corybufkin (09/29/2015) [-]
pro tip: dont include roasts about girls being ugly when theyre actually really pretty and everyone on fj would easily **** them...js
pro tip: dont include roasts about girls being ugly when theyre actually really pretty and everyone on fj would easily **** them...js
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+2
User avatar #7 - bogbean (09/28/2015) [-]
all of these were girls
it's like they all desperately need someone to point out what's wrong with them
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+3
#3 - rockergamer (09/28/2015) [-]
some of these were ******* lethal
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+2
User avatar #8 - adviceweed (09/28/2015) [-]
Can't tell whats worse.

These girls who need to be insulted for some kind of self-validation, or the people who humor them on it.
123>
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