Oblivious Single Motherfuckers.... This made me cringe a little.... 21 Men That Are Now Single For A Reason. It' s Hard Not To Feel Sorry For These Girls. I. A  compilation single cringe
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Oblivious Single Motherfuckers...

Oblivious Single Motherfuckers.... This made me cringe a little.... 21 Men That Are Now Single For A Reason. It' s Hard Not To Feel Sorry For These Girls. I. A

This made me cringe a little...

21 Men That Are Now Single For
A Reason. It' s Hard Not To Feel
Sorry For These Girls.
I. A girl once asked me to keep my dorm
door unlocked so that she could wake me
up in the morning. The next morning she
crawled into bed with me, and I couldn' t
understand why she would come over if
she was " tired.
I stayed perfectly still so that she would be
able to sleep.
2. A girl once asked to use my shower, and
left the door wide open as an invitation.
So I thought i' d be a funny guy and throw
ice cubes at her.
3. This girl and I were alone in my apartment,
and we' d Just finished watching a movie.
She' d had her head resting on my lap the
entire time. Afterwards we were spooning
on the couch, she cuddled up against me,
kissed me on the cheek, and looked up at
me expectantly. I stared at her for a few
moments and then said, "so... what do
you want to do?". After a while I ended up
taking her home.
4. In high school, a girl asked me for a ride
home from a football game one time, to
which I agreed. She asked if I wanted to
come in and see her room it forget why
this seemed like a normal thins)» and that
it wouldn' t bother her parents because
they weren' t home.
So, I went in and had a tour of her house,
then left. I was pretty pissed off when t
Figured it out a while later.
5. She ordered an Icescream cone,
accidentally' smeared it on her cheek, and
asked me to get it off. I grabbed the last
napkin and wiped it off. Persistent as ever,
she 'accidentally' smears Icescream on her
other cheek and politely informs me that I
can get it off with my mouth, given our
napkin dermit. [just said, "Nah, I hate
strawberry", and used my dry elbows to
get It off.
In hindsight, I should have used my shirt.
6. Her: "No one has even asked me to
homecoming!"
Me: "Yeah, me either. so what are you
going to do?"
Her: ''well, I guess if no one is going to ask
me... I' ll probably just stay home."
Me: "That' s probably what I' ll end up
doing too."
Her: "Yeah, so... it would be really nice to
go though."
Me: ''I agree, but oh we'll"
Me: "Mind If I call you that night?"
7. I once had a cute female In my bed. Said
she was cold. So... I gave her another
blanket.
g. I was dropping my date off at her
apartment after a nice evening. She asked
me up for coffee, but I politely declined,
stating ''I can' t drink coffee late at night, it
keeps me up"
Lady, if you' re out there, I didn' t realize
that coffee didn' t really mean ... well,
whatever.
9. One time, a girl kissed me on a school bus
without warning and told me that I could
get off at her stop and we could walk to
her house because her parents weren' t
home. I said no because I was going to
Miss Dragonball z.
IO. Sitting next to her at a school play:
Her: "My hands are cold."
Me: "Mine too"
Continue to do nothing
11. I was coming back home and I was at the
bag pickup. This really cute girl and I
started talking. The conversation was
about how she was Just visiting Miami and
really didn' t know where to go. After a
while we realized that we were the only
two people who haden' t gotten their bags
cause we were at the wrong conveyor.
After some joking and a trip to the
baggage claim we got our bags and stayed
there talking for a bit. My mom called me
telling me that she was outside. I said I
had to go and I saw a small look of
confusion/ frown on her face. I got into the
car and then it hit me: she wanted me to
show her around town, duh. I just look at
my mom and said, "you have raised the
biggest idiot on the planet."
12. Hung out with girl regularly and she
proceeds to walk me out to my car every
night we are together. We stand around
the car for 20 minutes having what seems
to be awkward conversations every time.
Did nothing and left.
13. I was at my tutor' s house, and for some
reason was in her bedroom. I lay down on
the bed (feet touching floor), and she
came over and straddled me. Must kind of
stared up at her; she looked down at me
for a few moments, then got off and said
OK, let' s do the lesson.
It wasn' t until a couple of months later
that t was like hey, she was waiting for me
to make a move. I was clueless because
she was my teacher, and she talked about
her boyfriend fairly frequently anyway.
M. Gave a girl a ride home, "Want to come in?
My parents are at work." Nah, I' m gonna
go hang out with my buddies.
15. Girl comes over, changes into a pair of my
boxers and lays in bed. Did nothing,
wondered why she' s wearing them, they
are obviously too big for her.
Drunk with friends playing card game. Two
girls go upstairs and motion me to come.
Hold on, I need to finish this game."
17. After dinner and a movie, we went to a
convenience store, she told me to go
inside and get "anything I needed". So I
come out with a bag of sun chips and two
raspberry flavored water bottles. She does
a face palm.
18. High school, sophomore year. A really cute
girl who lived down the street called me at
around to say that her skirt zipper
was broken and she couldn' t take it off.
She goes on to say her family isn' t home
and no one else is in the house to help her
remove it, and could I come over and help
her because "it' s an emergency".
She adds that she' ll reward me with a
glass of wine, since she just had one
herself and her parents aren' t home.
I, being the utter genius that I am, walk
her through (over the phone) how to
dissect a zipper, complete with getting
angry at her for being slow to get pliers
from her dad' s garage like I directed her to
After hanging up I felt like a great citizen.
Now when I look back on It, I just want to
hang myself.
19. Her: so this girl I know likes this guy I
know but he' s been oblivious to all of her
signals, so what does she have to do to tell
him she likes him?
Me: I don' t know, Just tell him she likes
him?
Her: Like, ''I like you?'' Just like that?
Me: Yeah, like that.
Her'. I like you.
Me: Yeah, tell her to tell him that, and
she' ll be all set.
pause
Me: Yup, you' got it... was there
anything else?
20. Girl made me a mix CD with gooey love
songs. Listened to two, threw it away
because the music sucks.
21. on a walk with a . "My hands are
cold." My thoughts "OH SWEET]
BROUGHT GLOVES, SHE' LL LOVE THIS."
Procure gloves, girl says no thanks with a
puzzled look. My thoughts: "What is she
crazy? These are DESIGNED to warm up
hands."
...
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Views: 63925
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Submitted: 04/18/2014
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Comments(552):

[ 552 comments ]
What do you think? Give us your opinion. Anonymous comments allowed.
User avatar #77 to #7 - hackhazardly (04/18/2014) [-]
Is that a sign of there interest though, is it.srsly though, i don't ******* know.
User avatar #201 to #7 - bothemastaofall (04/19/2014) [-]
AND EVEN THEN!
"I like you"
"Yup you've got it anything else?"
#420 to #201 - swagbot (04/19/2014) [-]
mfw #19
mfw #19
#103 - Freelon (04/18/2014) [-]
"So I thought i'd be a funny guy and throw ice cubes at her"

are you ******* serious?
#23 - Proximity (04/18/2014) [-]
Similar cold hand thing happened to me, but I wasn't as dense about it

Her: "My hands are cold"
I smoothly hold her hand with mine and say "Doesn't feel that cold to me..."
because that's the smoothest thing I could think to say in the moment
Her: "That's because your hands are ******* freezing"


Well ****
#66 to #23 - Rascal (04/18/2014) [-]
That wasn't your fault, brah. Still got those smooth moves.
#20 - allennis (04/18/2014) [-]
>In hindsight, I should have used my shirt
#471 to #20 - gitanisme (04/19/2014) [-]
wow, we read the same content   
i am so surprised
wow, we read the same content
i am so surprised
#390 to #20 - trueraiderfan (04/19/2014) [-]
This is immediately what I thought of touching her face when he said dry elbows sorry for the mental image
#9 - probrem ONLINE (04/18/2014) [-]
Who's Miss Dragonball z?
I think he made the right choice going to her instead.
number 10
#513 to #9 - checkedem (04/19/2014) [-]
**checkedem rolled image** i wouldnt miss DBZ either, its a bold strategy cotton, it does pays off
User avatar #416 to #9 - willgum (04/19/2014) [-]
that was number 9
#216 to #9 - tehlawnpwner (04/19/2014) [-]
i am miss dragonball z aswell
User avatar #2 - btgsxd ONLINE (04/18/2014) [-]
This sounds like every main character in every anime ive ever watched
#110 to #2 - bluzzerstream (04/18/2014) [-]
"Almost every"
#415 to #110 - cpupurpleheart (04/19/2014) [-]
To be fair he actually had a brain on him the only issue was that he was the true man whore and the person who caused that was Sekai. If she didn't make her ignorant move then the whole would've never happened. At least I think that's what would happen.
User avatar #365 to #110 - chiopet (04/19/2014) [-]
that's not anime, thats ****
#336 to #110 - kyngee (04/19/2014) [-]
That isn't mentioned around here
#43 - prodick (04/18/2014) [-]
#16 dude you missed one and only chance to have a 3some, I am truly sorry for your loss
#14 - kinginthenorth (04/18/2014) [-]
Somehow, it makes me feel better knowing that i'm not the only dense ************ out there
#367 to #14 - rebaj (04/19/2014) [-]
yea...but still
#470 to #367 - kinginthenorth (04/19/2014) [-]
It's not that i'm dense at everything, i'm just terrible at picking up hints
#525 to #470 - rebaj (04/19/2014) [-]
I just had to put it, you made me
Plus thats for me and you bro. There are heavy situations where I need a love guru telling me "Yo, dense ****** , she wanted you to tap that ass"
User avatar #350 to #14 - RisenLichen (04/19/2014) [-]
There are many like us man, we'll learn eventually


Eventually
User avatar #363 to #350 - zaxzwim (04/19/2014) [-]
just not any time soon
User avatar #375 to #363 - RisenLichen (04/19/2014) [-]
Eventually
#144 - Rascal (04/18/2014) [-]
I always used to over think when girls acted like this around me, "What if she's just making fun of me?" etc. Happened wayyy~ too often, and I probably missed out on loads of opportunities.   
   
One day I actually took in the "signs" that I had always over looked, and asked this particular girl out.   
"No anon, I was only messing with you. This is how I am with most guys you know."
I always used to over think when girls acted like this around me, "What if she's just making fun of me?" etc. Happened wayyy~ too often, and I probably missed out on loads of opportunities.

One day I actually took in the "signs" that I had always over looked, and asked this particular girl out.
"No anon, I was only messing with you. This is how I am with most guys you know."
User avatar #147 to #144 - maisymiss (04/18/2014) [-]
that was just one girl though. i'm sure most girls wouldn't be like that
User avatar #154 to #144 - assrocket (04/18/2014) [-]
'I was just messing with you'.
******* attention whore.
#45 - confusedasian (04/18/2014) [-]
This sounds like everything I would do. Except I would never realize it. Which makes me wonder. How many times has this happened to me without me knowing?
This sounds like everything I would do. Except I would never realize it. Which makes me wonder. How many times has this happened to me without me knowing?
#378 to #45 - Rascal (04/19/2014) [-]
I'm pretty sure i've done the same thing
#444 to #45 - fourtitwo (04/19/2014) [-]
I was thinking the exact same thing. Thank you for voicing my thoughts. I'll just do lie in a ditch somewhere.
User avatar #47 to #45 - danster (04/18/2014) [-]
Never. Women can smell obliviousness.
#306 to #45 - justabass (04/19/2014) [-]
These are the questions that keep people up at night.
These are the questions that keep people up at night.
#13 - sma (04/18/2014) [-]
> Miss Dragonball z   
   
dragonball is the only maiden for me
> Miss Dragonball z

dragonball is the only maiden for me
#10 - mrhaihoang ONLINE (04/18/2014) [-]
Met with the girl I had crush on in 7th grade after 7 years.
Went to lunch and coffee to catch up
She had boyfriend already
Asked me all the suggestive questions like: how are you in bed? whiff my neck and said "I like your natural smell"...
Finally asked me: I'm having something on my mind, you wanna go somewhere?
I got some idea but thought to myself "nah she got boyfriend, she doesnt mean anything", too beta to act.
By the end she had to go, she lol and told me "pay more attention next time".
User avatar #424 to #10 - monkeysniper ONLINE (04/19/2014) [-]
You should have given the boyfriend a heads up, so he knows really what kind of girl he's with
User avatar #433 to #10 - cazabrow (04/19/2014) [-]
That's not really such a massive miss, you knew she had a boyfriend so if you had, you'd have been a dirtbag for doing so.

That and comment #60.
#218 to #10 - soldiertwo (04/19/2014) [-]
IMO: people who dos basic cheating should burn in hell. ofc there can be small side things, like if the girl gets beaten up by her current BF and need some love from someone who dosen't got a voilent personality
IMO: people who dos basic cheating should burn in hell. ofc there can be small side things, like if the girl gets beaten up by her current BF and need some love from someone who dosen't got a voilent personality
User avatar #239 to #218 - Visual (04/19/2014) [-]
Even then, she should just dump her boyfriend after the first hit. Abusive relationships are rarely fixed.
#237 to #218 - billywonka (04/19/2014) [-]
..or she doesn't cheat and instead, calls the cops on the guy that just beat her up.
#300 to #237 - Rascal (04/19/2014) [-]
Yeeeeeah abusive relationships are not that simple.
User avatar #241 to #10 - Visual (04/19/2014) [-]
I don't blame you, you should never really get together with a cheating girl because that makes you a little ******* hypocrite if you ever date a girl and get mad when she cheats on you.

If my best female friend has a boyfriend and is basically nude, lubed up and rubbing all all over me, I still wouldn't **** that. Now it would be a completely different story if we were both single.
#421 to #10 - swagbot (04/19/2014) [-]
Yeah, man - sounds like that one was a cunt.

"Pay more attention"!?

smfh
#515 to #10 - lordofpenis (04/19/2014) [-]
'I like your natural smell'
#150 to #10 - pinkfloyd ONLINE (04/18/2014) [-]
If she sniffs your neck and says "I like your natural smell" its time to bail
User avatar #72 to #10 - sinonyx (04/18/2014) [-]
"I like your natural smell"


NOPE leaving now!
User avatar #60 to #10 - lillpip (04/18/2014) [-]
If she'll cheat with you, she'll cheat on you.
#67 to #60 - Rascal (04/18/2014) [-]
Best way anyone could've said it.
#151 to #60 - whyamihereagain (04/18/2014) [-]
Agreed. giving in to stuff like that is guaranteed misery.
Trust me on that.
#532 to #60 - ihaveabigpenis (04/19/2014) [-]
doesnt matter had sex
doesnt matter had sex
User avatar #4 - dabronydude (04/18/2014) [-]
some of these is just being nice and not wanting sex all the time with everything...
User avatar #100 to #4 - landofbabe (04/18/2014) [-]
please dont thumb this comment anymore up or down
User avatar #101 to #100 - landofbabe (04/18/2014) [-]
2 late ;(
#107 to #4 - Rascal (04/18/2014) [-]
But I thought all guys wanted was sex?
User avatar #16 to #4 - theugandanhero (04/18/2014) [-]
Kind of what I just commented
User avatar #187 to #16 - theugandanhero (04/19/2014) [-]
In my defence, I said it like I was agreeing with him, not being a snarky asshole about it.
User avatar #248 to #4 - indonesia (04/19/2014) [-]
this.
everyone said "man, you're total retard" or "man, why you not had sex with her?" but I don't want to had sex with her because she's total bitch, having sex with other person, cheating on me twice, and STILL waiting for me. ******* whore
#344 to #4 - lilhanna (04/19/2014) [-]
This is for every one who just assume sex is top priority.   
(I agree with dabronydude)
This is for every one who just assume sex is top priority.
(I agree with dabronydude)
#5 - ryendan (04/18/2014) [-]
One time I had a girl from work meet up with me while i was playing basketball.
Being awesome and having a great pick up game, score winning points.
Go back to my house, room mates are out so it's just us.
Me: "Hey I need to change real quick to get out of this basketball stuff"
Her: "Want me to come in?"
Me: "Nah I'll be out in a minute"

It took me quite some time to realize the situation at hand...and this girl was insanely hot but I wasn't thinking bout it because i was trying for relationship not sex...but man was i pissed when it fell through anyway and i realized what i turned down
#95 - spycheckingpyro (04/18/2014) [-]
>go to see WWE Raw
>be in the Army and in uniform
>get special seats for service members up front
>seated next to 9/10 Air Force girl also in uniform
>talk all show long
>find out she's into a lot of bro things and single
>out comes John Cena who throws us his shirt
>she bats her eyes and i let her have it
>holds my arm tight and keeps thanking me rest of the night
>after the show, another wrestler, Sheamus (see attached photo), comes by and thanks us for what we do
>asks if we knew any good places to drink and if we'd want to join him
>she says "nah, i think we got better plans to do"
>makes most realistic ;) i've ever seen any human being make at me
>tell Sheamus " **** YEAH! THERE'S THIS KICK ASS PLACE A FEW BLOCKS FROM HERE!"
>Air Force girl walks away

noregrets.jpg
#114 - Rascal (04/18/2014) [-]
Few years back on msn   
Girl: I'm going to the park after college   
Me: Cool, who else is going?   
Girl: Probably just me, lol   
Me: Well have fun : )   
Later...   
Her: Back~   
Me: Cool how was it?   
Her: I was alone... luckily I had my ipod with me, lol.   
<mfw realising
Few years back on msn
Girl: I'm going to the park after college
Me: Cool, who else is going?
Girl: Probably just me, lol
Me: Well have fun : )
Later...
Her: Back~
Me: Cool how was it?
Her: I was alone... luckily I had my ipod with me, lol.
<mfw realising
#30 - boxofwonderz (04/18/2014) [-]
#10 Holy 			****		 I think i have done that.... Dammit!
#10 Holy **** I think i have done that.... Dammit!
#35 to #30 - Rascal (04/18/2014) [-]
wait, so when girls say that they really mean they want to hold hands? I'm dense as hell when it comes to these things.
#59 - icefried (04/18/2014) [-]
I have done so many of these..   
Well, at least i'm not alone.
I have done so many of these..
Well, at least i'm not alone.
User avatar #480 to #59 - jordanish (04/19/2014) [-]
I've done about half but can honestly say I've never thrown ice cubes at a girl in my shower. Yet
#346 to #59 - lilhanna (04/19/2014) [-]
it just means your raised as a good guy. Trust yourself, when you want sex and you see the signs. You'll take them.
User avatar #73 to #59 - toadkillerdog (04/18/2014) [-]
join the club brother. I think I actually went on a date with a chick without even ******* realizing it.....
User avatar #75 to #73 - icefried (04/18/2014) [-]
Me too. Actually i had a girlfriend for a while without realizing it.. thought she was joking, proceeded to sort of ignore her for a couple of months before she said we had to brake up, but by that point i completely forgot what the hell she was talking about.
Can i apply for club president?
User avatar #78 to #75 - toadkillerdog (04/18/2014) [-]
actually I think we need ranks. Here this outta do :www.lenntech.com/periodic-chart-elements/density.htm
I'm probably uranium dense
User avatar #81 to #78 - icefried (04/18/2014) [-]
Marvelous.
I'd say i'm platinum. Osmium is reserved for the dense ************ who passed up the threesome for magic the gathering.
User avatar #185 to #81 - ronniesan (04/19/2014) [-]
what? How is that dense, maybe he knew and wanted to make the bitches wait like a man.
User avatar #299 to #73 - chezburgadominator ONLINE (04/19/2014) [-]
Don't feel bad. This girl I haven't talked to in months starts talking to me on facebook saying something along the lines of "Wow we haven't talked in a long time I missed this" and I said "Yeah hey wanna get something to eat sometime?" solely because I was hungry at the time, not realizing I just asked her out and she took it as a date and I meant it as a friend.
#508 - theluppijackal ONLINE (04/19/2014) [-]
Now this guy has his priorities right
User avatar #546 to #508 - theejoshster (04/21/2014) [-]
I was totally going to comment on that one. Nothing wrong with that.
#463 - dross (04/19/2014) [-]
Number 17:

>"Get anything you need".
>Come back out with a box of condoms
>"Jesus Christ you pig, how dare you assume that?"
>Walk a ******* long way home at night from a convenience store.

UN-WINNABLE SITUATION.
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