Military Punishments. part 1. 20 Punishments Handed Down By Superiors In The Military. These Are Horrifying But Genius. A private was caught walking to the show Military Punishment
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Military Punishments

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20 Punishments Handed Down
By Superiors In The Military.
These Are Horrifying But Genius.
A private was caught walking to the showers
without wearing his clothes. (Just holding his
towel and walking nude). The showers were in
the same bay, and it was just males in the bay,
but a female Drill from another platoon came in
and saw him, and made him drop and give so
pushups while nude.
USMC here. In our unit we had one guy that
would constantly hum songs. Well one day our co
had enough of his behavior so he Tells him to
Report to his Locker. so he goes to his locker and
stands in front of it, co tells him to get inside the
locker. when he does he shuts and locks the door
with him inside. He reaches into his pocket and
pulls out a quarter and pushes it through the vent
holes and tells the guy to start singing, and tells
him that whenever someone puts a quarter in the
slot he was to sing another song. this went on for
6 hours, the guy made around 15 bucks in
quarters and we were all in pain from laughing at
Needless to say he acquired the name 'jukebox'
and never hummed again
What are they going to do? Bend my dog tags?
Take my birthday away? chuckle chuckle"
Uhm.. Yep, apparently a Navy Captain did just
that once on purpose by deliberately sailing
parallel to the International Dateline then slipping
across it right on midnight.
Tomorrow suddenly became yesterday and no
birthday for you this year ya chuckle head.
During Beast at USAFA, one of my fellow cadets
started laughing at one of our Flight
whistling that "To the left, to the left" song. Cadre
went off on him...
Basic Cadet woo, are you laughing!?"
Yes, sir
why are you laughing, do you know what
happened today?"
No excuse, -"
Today is a day of national tragedy! We need to
memorialize his death. Pick up one of those
Does sal
This is now the Bruce Willis Memorial Rock.
What should we name RI?"
Sir, I do not kno-"
WE' RE GONNA NAME IT BRUCE! From now until
the end of Basic, you will carry Bruce with you at
all times! If I ask you how Bruce is doing, you will
show me Bruce and sound off "r' , sir."
Do you understand!?"
One of the other flights in my squadron had their
command for "forward march" changed to
Autobots, roll out." They had to make the
transformation sound from the old cartoon before
they were allowed to start marching,
In Basic training, one soldier hast his
canteen and asked the Drill Sergeant if he had
seen it. The Drill was angry at this for some
reason and made the private wander around for a
few hours asking all kinds of inanimate objects if
they had seen his canteen. Stt things like: "Truck,
have you seen my canteen?"
Saw a drill instructor (USMC) have a recruit find a
rock, name it Dignity and then throw it. Poor sap
spent the next chrs asking people if they' seen
his friend Dignity and walked around calling out
for it.
Got caught on basic with my Wed and I ran
around the camp for near 2 hours with my ipod
over my head shouting "i' m a stupid f** k for
bringing my ipod in the field" as the "enemy" was
attacking our camp. I then proceeded to put my
ipod in a plastic hag then taped it onto my helmet
and from there on I responded to Private mod.
When my instructor shouted play I had to sing,
skip I had to switch song etc... It lasted 2 weeks,
even during the night when I had hours to
A service member was a total f** , to put it
gently. Couldn' t be on time, couldn' t show up
dressed to standards, constantly forgot
professional courtesies, so on. When he was on
his last straw, his squad leader pulled him aside
and more or less started yelling, then stopped
lilo. You know what? I' m done yelling at you. It
doesn' t work. Stay right here; don' t go
anywhere." He stormed off into the company
building. The phrase, "stay right here, don' t go
anywhere" is typically the precursor to something
horrible happening when said in anger. The squad
leader eventually emerged carrying a smalldick
potted tree which he hands to the service
You will keep this tree alive. You will carry this
with you where ever you go in uniform. You will
take it to PT, you will take it to chow, you will
take it to work. If anyone asks you why you' re
carrying this f'" king tree around, you will tell
them, 'It' s to replace the oxygen I stole from
everyone else.'
Views: 51922 Submitted: 05/17/2014
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> hey anon, wanna give your opinion?
#6 - chcknchsr
Reply +271 123456789123345869
(05/18/2014) [-]
I had to check, but Bruce Willis is still alive.
I had to check, but Bruce Willis is still alive.
#51 to #6 - hazelnutqt
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(05/18/2014) [-]
#165 to #6 - anon id: 817af3ea
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(05/18/2014) [-]
Well, you know what they say about old habits...
User avatar #67 to #6 - jonajon
Reply +9 123456789123345869
(05/18/2014) [-]
It was probably for when Die Hard 5 came out.
#1 - tazzerz
Reply +128 123456789123345869
(05/17/2014) [-]
I love these military training punishment things so damn much. Some of them are pure evil genius.

Pic semi-related
User avatar #161 to #1 - nandaaz
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(05/18/2014) [-]

here's more, I'm pretty sure everything in the comp is from this thread
User avatar #12 - leonkierrn
Reply +104 123456789123345869
(05/18/2014) [-]
There is nothing like making private spend his whole Saturday in full gear to "sweep" the sunlight out of a parking lot.
#60 to #12 - lokischosen
Reply +3 123456789123345869
(05/18/2014) [-]
Comment Picture
User avatar #61 - guiguito
Reply -45 123456789123345869
(05/18/2014) [-]
I would just stare blankly at the commander and say: no.
Seriously how hard it it?
User avatar #145 to #61 - durkadurka
Reply +1 123456789123345869
(05/18/2014) [-]
No you wouldn't. You'd piss your pants and do what you were ordered to do. Saying no just makes things worse.
User avatar #158 to #61 - tealcanaan
Reply +2 123456789123345869
(05/18/2014) [-]
What sissy European conscript army did you serve in?
User avatar #109 to #61 - karlKroenen
Reply +3 123456789123345869
(05/18/2014) [-]
Lol. That's the exact thing every cocky kid thinks they will say. Some actually say it, once.
User avatar #77 to #61 - iamnuff
Reply +7 123456789123345869
(05/18/2014) [-]
yeah, the Ipod thing would have done it for me.

1 or 2 hours sleep a night over taking personal effects out with you?


you need to be asleep for atleast three hours (or thereabouts) to drop into REM sleep, which is the one that actually lets your brain rest, so he basically had zero sleep for two weeks, which is obviously a lie because you start hallucinating after about four days, and after seven you risk dropping dead.

assuming he managed to get enough sleep to stave off the worst of it and made himself functional, it's still torture.

if someone wakes you up for that **** while you are sleeping, tell them no, kick their ******* ass. if your sargent continues with that ********, report him.

that sort of behaviour is literally banned by the Geneva convention.

if you can't get away with treating prisoners of war that way, they you can't treat your own troops that way either.

you can talk about "respect and discipline" as much as you like, but respect has to be earned, and abusing your power over your subordinates loses you it, not earns it. as for "discipline" in the military, that's basically code for "do as i say without question" and in a firefight, sure, thats good.

following random ******** orders that exist only to make you suffer? no.

no reason for it, no purpose, no gain.

it's wasteful and stupid.
User avatar #102 to #77 - ChewyConor
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(05/18/2014) [-]
Sleep cycles are typically 110 minutes but can be anywhere from about 60 to 150 minutes. As you get sleep deprived, your early sleep cycles get shorter. REM is the last part but will almost certainly be done if you've been asleep for a couple hours.
One uninterrupted sleep cycle is supposed to put off the worst sleep deprivation symptoms for another 12-18h.
You can get by on two sleep cycles per night on a long term basis.
User avatar #66 to #61 - agrani
Reply +92 123456789123345869
(05/18/2014) [-]
Youve never been in the army have you?
User avatar #68 to #66 - guiguito
Reply -9 123456789123345869
(05/18/2014) [-]
I did the obrigatory service when i turned 18, aparently my superior officers play by the book.
User avatar #70 to #68 - agrani
Reply +16 123456789123345869
(05/18/2014) [-]
You got lucky then
Fistly, its a matter of respect for your superior, and a matter of discipline
Second, saying no to a superior would make it hell of alot worse
User avatar #71 to #70 - guiguito
Reply -4 123456789123345869
(05/18/2014) [-]
Actually one dude in my company was gay, so my superior was kinda harsh on him, one day he stood for himself and the commanding officer got spelled, discipline is one thing, teaching the hardships of the battlefield is also one thing, but stupid **** that is either fabricated to entretain FJers and milk thumbs or to simply amuse someone using a berret is a completly different story.
User avatar #72 to #71 - agrani
Reply +11 123456789123345869
(05/18/2014) [-]
Its not bad behaviour if youre being bashed for being gay, but most of these dudes were being dicks
User avatar #75 to #71 - lolollo
Reply +8 123456789123345869
(05/18/2014) [-]
The difference being that most lawyers will have jumped on ANY case pertaining to guy bashing, making the option to say "no" much more tangible than doing it in a situation where you're simply humming a lot.

Other than that, I do agree with you. Any time my Drill SGTs went over the top with anything, it was warranted. Anytime someone tried to explain something, they listened (after a while). Any time they wanted to act stereotypical just to be funny, it was always minimal, like lording over someone who got a care package and making an extra big deal that their "momma loves her little action figure!" Granted, even if it was warranted, they'd still do **** that was socially permanent, since it's still a thing that half of the punishment be through your peers (for some reason). While I don't agree that most of the punishments involved getting the rest of the company to hate you, since that **** just degrades overall morale, and breaks down the "level of cohesion" they said they were trying to build, I guess I am lucky they didn't do it frivolously.
User avatar #166 to #71 - TheExile
Reply +1 123456789123345869
(05/18/2014) [-]
Although some of these are made up, I can tell you a lot of these things do happen. In my 8 short weeks of basic, we had one troop who had to keep a mothball the MTI found in his locker. It was named Steve, and the troop had to keep track of it and all it's information. It had a social security number, birthday, phone number, and some other basic info. MTI would always drill him on it. When he lost it one day, MTI asked to see Steve. He brought up another mothball, and somehow he knew it was not "Steve". Screamed at him, then made him go to the gardens and give a 21 gun salute by himself to Steve at the garden. When he came back to the dorms, the kid had to flush the "Commie Spy" mothball down the toilet, then stand guard with his training rifle for 3 hours to make sure he didn't come back. Stupid **** like that happens all the time.
User avatar #98 to #68 - kirkbot
Reply +3 123456789123345869
(05/18/2014) [-]
I don't know what book they play by, but our superiors would warn you once to obey and if you didn't they would put you in jail for a couple days
User avatar #9 - caffeinecommissar
Reply +20 123456789123345869
(05/18/2014) [-]
Sorry, but could someone,explain to me the issue behind walking naked to the shower?

I know military life is all strict-discipline and all, but it just strikes me as odd.

Now whichever militaryexplain / armyexplain / usarmyexplain explains it, I don't care.
User avatar #10 to #9 - windson
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(05/18/2014) [-]
das gay yo
User avatar #40 to #9 - usarmyexplain
Reply +1 123456789123345869
(05/18/2014) [-]
Well, for one he was out of uniform. The showers are usually in a room attached to the bay, with a changing room outside the shower area. The post doesn't say anything about footwear but you also need to have shower shoes on when you are in the shower.

Uniforms are kind of extremely a big deal in the military.
User avatar #82 to #9 - armyexplain
Reply +1 123456789123345869
(05/18/2014) [-]
It's nearly the same in all armies.
You're supposed to wear clothing to anywhere you go.

Showering in that case is a private activity, though, you wear bathing shoes ( Slippers ) shorts and a T-shirt to your shower.

As said below, in certain armies uniformal discipline is a highly appreciated discipline.
#13 to #9 - needmore
Reply +3 123456789123345869
(05/18/2014) [-]
Typically it wouldn't of been a problem seeing as it was in an all male squad bay, but since a female drill instructor stepped in it turned south real quick for the poor dude.
User avatar #15 to #13 - caffeinecommissar
Reply +6 123456789123345869
(05/18/2014) [-]
Makes me think there is a punchline to a joke here, somewhere...

So a female drill sergeant walks into an all-male bay...

...*something about privates dropping*.

Thanks for the answer though.
User avatar #41 to #15 - usarmyexplain
Reply -1 123456789123345869
(05/18/2014) [-]
"dropping" is just what they call doing push ups
User avatar #42 to #41 - caffeinecommissar
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(05/18/2014) [-]
Wow, your private parts can do push-ups, amazing?
User avatar #45 to #42 - usarmyexplain
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(05/18/2014) [-]
Private is the first rank in the army, and yes the rank is used as the butt of many jokes.

"Look at you, privates! Ya'll some nasty ass privates! It smells like feet in here! Don't worry, I'll teach you to be clean. 'Cause ya'll my privates, and I like my privates clean. Some of ya'll need to shave. I like my privates smooth."


"Look privates, I like you. You my privates. Nobody gets to touch my privates. Not even I touch my privates. If anybody touches you, you come find me and tell me. Some people think we should beat privates, I even want to beat my privates some times, but that's not good for privates."
a Drill Sgt explaining that they were not allowed to hit us.
User avatar #24 to #13 - leonkierrn
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(05/18/2014) [-]
That depends, last i knew that in an area that this kind of "exposure" could happen even if it was a male ds or di that he could have gotten in trouble.
#29 to #24 - needmore
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(05/18/2014) [-]
well I guess things change, when I went through boot camp I was running with only a towel around my waist into the shower, sometimes the towel would fall off, nothing came of it
#37 to #29 - superduperpuper
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(05/18/2014) [-]
So the towel dropped and nothing came of it... interesting
User avatar #34 to #29 - leonkierrn
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(05/18/2014) [-]
It might also depends much more if your basic was coed, mine was. Some still are not.
#11 to #9 - leonkierrn
Reply +42 123456789123345869
(05/18/2014) [-]
The military had to buckle down on sexual harassment cases. In an open bay, a room full of beds and wall lockers there are no places hiding places. So a dude walking down 100ft long room naked, while female DS can come and go is bad as it can lead to more issues.
The military had to buckle down on sexual harassment cases. In an open bay, a room full of beds and wall lockers there are no places hiding places. So a dude walking down 100ft long room naked, while female DS can come and go is bad as it can lead to more issues.
User avatar #14 to #11 - caffeinecommissar
Reply +6 123456789123345869
(05/18/2014) [-]
So... they trust them to be able to protect the country, but not to protect themselves?

I mean, I understand the whole 'sexual-harassment is bad mmmkay', but in a field of work that deals with guns and war it seems weird to expect people not to know some sort of self-defence.
User avatar #18 to #14 - leonkierrn
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(05/18/2014) [-]
You can't always have a good apple-tree without bad apples. After basic most people get slotted into their job and that job can take a long time to learn, many forget basic soldiering techniques. Not everyone even sees war, some people never leave the USA to go over seas. Not to mention if your not infantry then you'll almost never go over the stuff again. I was signal, after I finished training that was it. Sides few times at paintball training, which was once a year for me.
User avatar #25 to #18 - caffeinecommissar
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(05/18/2014) [-]
Fair point.
#17 to #14 - anon id: bd23ca5d
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(05/18/2014) [-]
Wait, who should "be able to protect themselves"?
User avatar #19 to #17 - caffeinecommissar
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(05/18/2014) [-]
#20 to #19 - Temari
0 123456789123345869
has deleted their comment [-]
User avatar #22 to #20 - leonkierrn
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(05/18/2014) [-]
he asked why the soldiers couldn't they protect themselves from sexual harassment and assault
#28 to #22 - anon id: bd23ca5d
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(05/18/2014) [-]
Wtf, thats like saying that instead of preventing house fires, we should learn how to properly evacuate a house that's on fire. That's ridiculous. It's very easy to get harassed as a female soldier and nearly impossible to get help for it, numbskull.
User avatar #88 to #28 - caffeinecommissar
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(05/18/2014) [-]
Now you are just putting words in my mouth or twisting those that are there already. Not even sure I care which one.

I'd expect a soldier to defend themselves, yes, because their job description is pretty much "defending the country".

But that being said, I never said there shouldn't be any form for rape prevention.
User avatar #30 to #28 - leonkierrn
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(05/18/2014) [-]
That's what i was telling him
#33 to #30 - anon id: bd23ca5d
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(05/18/2014) [-]
Yeah, that was meant for caffeinecommissar, sorry.
#21 to #20 - Temari
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has deleted their comment [-]
User avatar #23 to #21 - caffeinecommissar
Reply +2 123456789123345869
(05/18/2014) [-]
Some anonymous guy asked me whom I meant should be able to defend themselves.

I answered soldiers.

I just figured, soldiers would - in case they were going to get into a combat situation - know how to defend themselves from the stuff you find in a war zone.
User avatar #27 to #23 - Temari
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(05/18/2014) [-]
Oh I get it. I totally misread this conversation. It's 3 am, I'm not awake enough for all of this. Sorry.
#36 to #27 - anon id: 0c0eef07
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(05/18/2014) [-]
You, **** you for deleting your own comments just because you are afraid of red thumbs.
User avatar #185 to #36 - Temari
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(05/18/2014) [-]
Afraid of red thumbs? Look at my comments, that's not true. I deleted them because they were useless, they were questions that were answered.
#26 to #23 - anon id: bd23ca5d
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(05/18/2014) [-]
Anon is back. I thought you were saying that since theyre soldiers, they should be able to defend themselves agains't sexual assault, which is a horrible thing to say. Blaming the victim and saying that prevention shouldn't happen, etc.
User avatar #31 to #26 - caffeinecommissar
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(05/18/2014) [-]
Well, I was kind of trying to say that being taught self-defence of various forms would logically function as some sort of prevention, though of course not 100% successful.

I'm not trying to condone rape of any sorts (male on female, male on male, female on male or female on female - all of them happens) - unless of course we are talking rape fantasies, but that is a matter of fetishists and tends to be prearranged within a set number of circumstances - but we are talking a profession here that deals with war, so naturally I had an expectation that people knew some self defence.

To be honest, I hoped for a better explanation than "Because of rape" for why you aren't allowed to be naked on your way to the shower, but it is a good enough reason for me.
#32 to #31 - anon id: bd23ca5d
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(05/18/2014) [-]
Rape in the military is a play on power, though. And females can't tell anyone because they won't believe them or the person they told is in cahoots with the rapist.
User avatar #35 to #32 - caffeinecommissar
Reply +1 123456789123345869
(05/18/2014) [-]
Which is why there is such a thing called Military Police (or more specifically the aspect referred to as 'Provost').

Though of course as you implied it can be embarrassing to report it, but people not reporting rape isn't something isolated to the military.
User avatar #43 to #32 - usarmyexplain
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(05/18/2014) [-]
In any given unit their are 3, independent ways for anyone to report rape or sexual assault.

First would be the chain of command, it's very public,very messy, and if proven ends very poorly for the offender jail time is actually a vacation after what the army does to most people who are punished under the UCMJ .
Second is the EO rep, anyone can make an undocumented report in order to receive no questions asked support, medical care, and counseling. There are usually multiple onces to choose from, one for each level of command Company, battalion, brigade, ect.. .
Third, the option always exists to go to the IG office and make a report, totally anonymous as the IG is independent from their CoC, but that is more if you suspect that the above options are not feasible. Going to the IG office will get your entire CoC in a huge amount of trouble if the allegations are proven.
User avatar #16 to #11 - caffeinecommissar
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(05/18/2014) [-]
Thanks for the answer though.
#53 - anon id: 63e18ea0
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(05/18/2014) [-]
User avatar #62 to #53 - mkgt
Reply -12 123456789123345869
(05/18/2014) [-]
I'm a ******* Major General, so watch your ****, son.
User avatar #76 to #62 - blokrokker
Reply +2 123456789123345869
(05/18/2014) [-]
Are you the very model? The very model...of a modern Major General? Do you have information? Information...vegetable, animal, and mineral?
User avatar #213 to #76 - mkgt
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(05/18/2014) [-]
Vegetables- Yuck
Animal- Yum
Mineral- Nah
User avatar #122 to #62 - dawggz
Reply +1 123456789123345869
(05/18/2014) [-]
Major Cunt?
#80 to #62 - anon id: c1e92ea8
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(05/18/2014) [-]
lol ******
#56 to #53 - neoexdeath
Reply +3 123456789123345869
(05/18/2014) [-]
I'm in the Coast Guard, so **** you.
I'm in the Coast Guard, so **** you.
User avatar #159 to #56 - tealcanaan
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(05/18/2014) [-]
"I'm lucky, so **** you"
User avatar #55 to #53 - thegrimgenius
Reply +34 123456789123345869
(05/18/2014) [-]
User avatar #83 to #53 - BwainPhreeze
Reply +41 123456789123345869
(05/18/2014) [-]
You found my Dignity!
#87 - PenguinsOfMars
Reply +36 123456789123345869
(05/18/2014) [-]
i ship to usaf basic training in 9 days, glad i chose the pussy branch
#90 to #87 - anon id: 0e3c15bd
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(05/18/2014) [-]
Have fun at the golf course
User avatar #129 to #87 - coolchalkyxxx
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(05/18/2014) [-]
Good luck in the "Chair force".
#131 to #129 - PenguinsOfMars
Reply +1 123456789123345869
(05/18/2014) [-]
deployed army and marines do r&r on air force deployed locations, i regret nothing
deployed army and marines do r&r on air force deployed locations, i regret nothing
User avatar #133 to #131 - coolchalkyxxx
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(05/18/2014) [-]
Haha I know man I was just messing. Sides' Im in the Navy and we have our fair share names we get called. GL in basic.
User avatar #151 to #87 - leonkierrn
Reply 0 123456789123345869
(05/18/2014) [-]
You (can) get paid more if you get stuck in different military barracks then usaf, because other barracks will not be up to the usaf standards of livings.
#172 to #87 - Lulzilla
Reply +2 123456789123345869
(05/18/2014) [-]
I don't know of this USAF you talk about...
We have the Marines...Army...Navy...Coast Guard (Sorta), Then we have the Chair Force. No Air Force here.
#73 - threeofclubs
Reply +28 123456789123345869
(05/18/2014) [-]
A guy in my unit went AWOL. After the army quit paying him he called his SGT and asked why. His SGT told him to go to any police station and explain to them the situation, being government employees they'd be able to help him out. We never heard from him again.
User avatar #125 - tonicwater
Reply +21 123456789123345869
(05/18/2014) [-]
I've got one
USAF Basic Training
It was pretty early on in training (about 1st or 2nd week) and the flight was just starting to come together as a group but most people still had a hard time moving with a purpose. One day, the training instructor calls a column of files to bring the flight inside and everyone does their usual slow paced meander inside. This time the instructor is not having that ****. He has everyone form back up outside at double arm intervals. This is a dead giveaway that we are going to get put on our faces. "It is clear to me that you all can not get it though your thick skulls that you are supposed to move with a purpose out here! Every flight that I push is the best at what they do and if you want to move slow, we are going to be the slowest damn flight in the history of the air force! How many of you have seen the Matrix?" Most of the flight raises their hands. "Good. Now I am sure that you all have seen the scenes where they are all moving in slo-mo to dodge bullets. I want you to move no faster than that! Get on your faces!" Everyone takes nearly a full minute to get into pushup position. We do several 20 second pushups (10 seconds going down 10 going up). During these pushups two girls from another flight march by and he pulls them aside and tells them to go meet up with the rest of their flight and tell them about how slow our flight was and to write home to their families about how slow our flight was. He then calls us to go inside once more and everyone does this awkward (and slightly painful) slow motion walk to go inside. If anyone took more than 1 step every ten seconds he would yell " Woah Trainee! Thats way too fast! You might overexert yourself!" It took the entire flight over 20 minutes to climb 2 sets of stairs to our dormitory. Needless to say, we never half-assed anything for the rest of training.

I have a few others but this one is the best.
User avatar #169 to #125 - TheExile
Reply +1 123456789123345869
(05/18/2014) [-]
Man. The two funniest things I ever saw were things trainees did, not what MTI's did (not to say there wasn't a lot of crazy **** they did, but these two people just kill me).

First was some kid who managed to skip out on EC duty for most of basic. 6th week, he's on it for the first time. MTI came up to the door and knocked. When the kid went to verify his name, he said the MTI was not verified. I was Bed 1 as EC Monitor, and could tell I was ****** for not training him right away. He kept going through the steps, asked if he could refer him to his MTI wat , the CQ. . . MTI said no to everything. Instead of starting over like he should, they just stared at each other for a good 30 seconds. Then, the kid sealed his own fate. After the staredown had long been awkward, he slowly closed the window flap and tried to walk away. Apparently, our MTI had keys, and that trainee had one hell of a day after.

The other kid had waited until our MTI had left, then when he was cleaning the office, he found the MTI's hat. Instead of assuming he would come back for his hat, which is part of regulation, he assumed that the hat would be there for the night. He started marching around our dorm in nothing but his dress shoes, socks, and the MTI hat. Our MTI returned just in time for him to do a facing movement and face the MTI. He slowly approached the kid and just took the hat then walked away and left without a word. Next day he paid hell for it, though.

Originally we thought the second kid only got off that night because it was so late and our MTI had somewhere to be. . . our MTI later told us it was because it took every ounce of self control he had to burst out laughing in front of us.
#168 to #125 - Lulzilla
Reply +3 123456789123345869
(05/18/2014) [-]
Here's a good one.
USMC Parris Island

My Senior Drill Instructor had a funny way of getting rid of people he did not like. If you proved to be to pathetic for him he'll suddenly decide to start trying to sell you gerbils and cats at night. He would be on your ASS during the day but once lights out came he'll creep up on you in the middle of the night while you sleep. Brings magazines and books about gerbils and cats while he begins to tell said recruit random facts out of these books. Some facts he made up. He would ask him if he'd want any gerbils or cats since he had a couple. Tell said recruit to write back home asking if they want any cats or gerbils. When morning came he would completely ignore the fact that he ever did that. If ANYONE asked he'd deny it but we all knew it happened. This would drive recruits insane within a week.

Another favorite tactic he does is if you are bed rest for whatever reason but if he did not like you. He would completely block out the windows with black paper so NO light comes in. Take away any clocks around that they could see from their rack. No one was allowed to tell him the time. No one. The only way he'd know what time it was is by when he's fed and various dead give aways. He'd have the lights shut off when no one else is in the squad bay other then you but would not let you sleep until you're allowed too. Drove a recruit insane within 3 days.
#81 - samoaspider
Reply +15 123456789123345869
(05/18/2014) [-]
I read the whole damn thing and I gotta say, the Jukebox one was the best in my opinion
User avatar #86 to #81 - loopymoomoo
Reply +1 123456789123345869
(05/18/2014) [-]